- >So there you are, just minding your own business then BAM!
- >Some stupid little wachamacallit slams right into you!
- [HEY! I'm flying here!]
- >Not being the airborne sky master you claim to be, you take a few seconds to rebalance yourself.
- >You look after it. A small black streak traces off into the distance.
- >It’s fast.
- [Jahvise.]
- >**Already tracing it, Sir.**
- >The loading symbol appears on your screen as you speed off for whatever mad pony thought it was a good idea to hit a flying metal can with lasers.
- >**Sir, I cannot track the pony. It’s biological signature is not on my records..**
- [What do you mean? I programmed you to follow the BioSigs of earth ponies, pegasi, and unicorns.]
- >**Yes, I know. The issue is that THING is none of those.**
- >None of them? But that’s impossible.
- >All griffons you’ve seen have been brown and white, never black. Besides, it was too small to be a griffon.
- >Flying dragons are never that small either. Jahvise is malfunctioning, it MUST be a pony!
- >Well…what else could it be?
- [Can you follow a heat trail?]
- >**No. The being emits no heat for me to follow.**
- [W-well…]
- >**I looked over everything, Sir. I cannot track it.**
- >Well shoot.
- [Jahvise, save this location and what direction we we’re heading in.]
- >**Saved.**
- >Hopefully the whatever continues to fly straight and you can come back later. Right now its party time!
- >Kind of!
- >You arrive where Pinkie said the party would be but it’s more of a get-together.
- >Just the usual 6 gals and a couple others.
- >What, nobody likes you suit?
- >Stupid, uneducated mongrels.
- >No one can seem to appreciate science here but Twilight and even her insignificant brain pales in comparison to your superior human mind.
- >Wow, whered that come from?
- >You racist son of a gun.
- >Oh well, just pass it off—
- >No! Don’t pass it off! Ever since you got here, whenever something strange happened you brushed it aside and told yourself to check back later, only to never do it.
- >You know what? Time to think!
- >Grabbing a couple *cough* dozen *cough* bottles of beer and stuffing them into a sac, you say goodbye to the girls.
- [Thanks Pinkie. I really do feel a lot better.]
- >”Oh really? That’s great, Anon!”
- >Whatever unintelligible sentence was escaping her mouth was unheard to you, as your jets carried you off into the sky.
- [Jahivse, load the save point.]
- >Wow, what a sense of accomplishment.
- >You haven’t even done anything yet but fly straight for 2 hours and yet you feel like you’re finally getting things done.
- [J-Jahvise are we almost home yet?]
- >**You weren’t going home, Sir. You wanted to follow the strange creature from earlier.**
- [Oh yeah dash right.]
- >Your faceplate opens up, allowing all the wind to blow into your eyes.
- >With them closed, you pop open a beer bottle and hold it out in front of you. The liquid courage pours from the bottle and directly into your mouth.
- >You’ve had…lots of practice.
- >Why do ponies even have beer bottles?
- >…
- >Oh yeah! You’re following blacks.
- >**Sir, my maps say we’re entering Changling Isle.**
- [Changlan Whatle?]
- >**Changling Isle. Home of the changelings.**
- [Well fancy that! Imma make some new friends tonight!]
- >Your bag falls from your shoulder.
- >You would be sad if it weren’t empty.
- >**Pony Law, last updated 3 years ago, clearly states no ponies are allowed within a 3 hooflometer radius of the island.**
- [Hoofwhameter?]
- >**On Earth it would be kilometers.**
- […]
- >**Think of miles but not.**
- [Oh pish posh, I'm not a pony! I can do whuever I want! I can even go poopies if I want!]
- >**Please don’t.**
- [I NEVAH SAID I WUS GOING TOO!]
- >With that, a warm stream of liquid runs down your leg in the armor.
- >**Sir…**
- [Thas not pee…]
- >You giggle and land on a tall rock right outside the island.
- >Time to enter a new…time to enter a new paradise.
- >I said, time to enter a new paradise.
- >Come on leg, move.
- >Leg?
- [Jahvise kum on man don’t even be lake that.]
- >**I will unlock the armor in the morning when you are sober again.**
- [Jahvise iss my armer en I can do whu I wan with itz.]
- >**You’re too drunk for your own good.**
- >Curse his logic and your drowsiness.
- >Maybe it would be best to catch a few Zs anyway.
- [J-Jahvise?]
- >**Yes, Sir?**
- [Ah love yew.]
- >**I love you too.**

