Title:           Punny Pinkie: Bell Ringer
Author:          PunAnon
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/pZYp0Y2F
First Edit:      Tuesday 28th of January 2014 10:02:36 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Tuesday 28th of January 2014 10:02:36 PM CDT

>Being armless suck
>You'd be able to do so much more if you had a pair, but, unfortunately, you aren't blessed with them.
>Finding a job isn't easy either.
>Ever seen an armless baker?
>There's a reason why you haven't.
>Regardless, you have put food on the table and a roof over your head.
>Using your feet to open the newspaper, you look over the classifieds in hope of finding something.
>Massage therapist?
>No.
>Handyman?
>Nah.
>Pillow fluffer?
>Pass.
>Bell ringer.
>Actually, you might be able to do that one!
>As you approach the town square, Mayor Mare is the first one to greet you.
>"Ah, hello, Anon! What can I help you with today?"
"I'm here about the bell ringer job."
>The mayor gives you an uneasy glance.
>"Are you sure? I mean won't it be difficult—"
"—without arms? Not if I improvise."
>Curiosity sparkles in her eyes.
>"Alright. If you can prove yourself resourceful, I'll hire you."
>Once you reach the top of the tall tower, you stand before the bell and mare.
>"Okay, go ahead."
>Running at full speed, you jump into the air and collide with the bell, causing it to ring.
>"I'm impressed. You have the job. Just ring the bell every hour according to the hour."
----------
>Four months have passed since then and you couldn't be happier.
>A decent job, a happy living.
>....Until today.
>As six o'clock rolls around, you attempt to hit the bell, but miss, plummeting to the ground.
>Ponies across the market come to your aid, some screaming their heads off.
>"Oh Celestia! Is he alright?!"
>"Who is he?"
>Just as death touches you with his cold embrace, you see a devilish, pink smile.
>"I don't know who he is, but his face rings a bell..."