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My Little Airman pt 5 Foooooooood

By: PonyAirman on Apr 21st, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 6.92 KB  |  hits: 444  |  expires: Never
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  1. Part 5 Foooooooood
  2.  
  3. >As the two of you leave, your attention falls onto your escort.
  4. Hey, Twilight, what was that spell?
  5. >She stops and gives you a funny look
  6. >"Anon, it should be obvious. You know our language because of that spell."
  7. Well, I mean I know that. What I meant to ask was... is it always that painful?
  8. >She considers this, and a puzzled face appears upon her visage. "Actually, no. It's supposed to be quick and easy. It wasn't supposed to last that long or hurt you."
  9. >That's good to hear. Always good.
  10. ...How long was I screaming?
  11. >"You were in that state for about 40 minutes. I tried to help you, but the Princess told me to watch and wait. We thought that since you're not part of our world, our magic might take longer to work, if it did at all. We were starting to get worried that you wouldn't snap out of it, and we were about to..."
  12. About to what?
  13. >She looks down
  14. Oh. Well, I wouldn't have blamed you if you had. I wouldn't want to live the rest of my life in that sort of pain.
  15. >"...Sorry that the spell hurt you...When I did it..."
  16. >You cut her off
  17. It's not a big deal. I've been through worse in SERE training.
  18. >She gives you a curious look, wanting an explaination. Damn, she really does want you to explain everything. Well, maybe sometime...
  19. >Meanwhile, your stomach growls loud enough to shake the castle
  20. >She giggles. "How about we get some lunch before we head back to Ponyville?"
  21. >You can't argue with that. Maybe you can get something more substantial than a salad
  22. >The two of you walk around Canterlot for around 10 minutes, your stomach growing louder every second
  23. >Damn, everybody is staring at you. You're almost tempted to shout at them. "Never seen a soldier before?"
  24. >You realize that you're probably the only human any of these ponies has ever seen.
  25. >God damnit, you hate being conspicuous. It only makes you a bigger target.
  26. >Just think about the food.
  27. >Yeah... Imagine a salami and beef sandwich
  28. >Tomato, swiss cheese, bacon ranch dressing, lettuce... no, FUCK LETTUCE
  29. >"We're here! Anon, are you ok?"
  30. >Uh... no. You were drooling over your dream sandwich
  31. >You wipe the drool from your mouth and look up to find you're at something called the E. Street Cafe...
  32. >Disbelief sweeps you as you examine the shop. An atmosphere typical of Starbucks hangs over this place, with not quite thesame but similar enough lighting. One thing that calms you down is it appears that food is the main focus, drinks being second.
  33. >You turn to Twilight
  34. What's the E stand for in this place?
  35. >"Equestrian, of course! What else could it be?"
  36. >Enlisted. Like the Enlisted Club. Those were always fun...
  37. >As an officer, how often did you go there?
  38. >God damnit brain, why?
  39. >Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band... No way he'd be here. But it might make things bearable. That was one of your favorite rock bands, not to mention your father's band of choice. Listening to Bruce with him, it always had the feel of those father-son moments that television specials talked about so often
  40. >...
  41. >Nothing to say about that, brain?
  42. >No, that's accurate. Except you forgot how he...
  43. >"Excuse me Anon, what do you want to eat?"
  44. >Train of thought de-railed
  45. "I'm sorry, the shock of being here must be getting to me."
  46. >She offers a sympathetic smile. "I'll help you out as much as I can, including helping you get home, but please do try not to stare off like that."
  47. >Thousand-yard stare. Have you been traumatized enough to warrant such a stare? Maybe on Earth...
  48. >Registry corruption has occured. Would you like to restore system back to an earlier backup? (Y/N)
  49. >Y
  50. >File not found
  51. >You snap yourself out of it this time
  52. Yeah, of course. Sorry.
  53. >"It's not a problem. So what do you want to eat?"
  54. >Let's not make this complicated
  55. >Despite what you just said about FUCK LETTUCE, you find yourself craving a hometown favorite
  56. A BLT would hit the spot right now
  57. >"A BLT?"
  58. Yeah, a bacon, lettuce and tomato
  59. >"...Bacon? What's that?"
  60. >Ah shit. Logic brain, now!
  61. >Well, they are ponies. On home, they were herbavores, so eating other animals probably wouldn't ever occur to them. At least the sane ones
  62. >You shudder at the thought of a cannibal pony
  63. >Shit, looks like you're going to have to suck it up right now
  64. ....Never mind. Salad sounds fine right now
  65. >"Ok." she says awkwardly. Her face looks like she suspects something
  66. >Shitshitshit. She KNOWS
  67. >Pokerface.jpg
  68. >The two of you sit at a table after Twilight orders for both of you
  69. >Looking around, there are ponies. So many ponies. So. Many. Fucking Ponies.
  70. >Of so many colors. Every pony has a tattoo on it's ass. Some have horns, some have wings. Some have neither. SO MANY QUESTIONS
  71. >There's an outdoor section but you're inside windows windows are there for easy access in a-
  72. >You find yourself habitually memorizing the layout of the cafe.
  73. >Curious habit
  74. >You force yourself to stop, as you can tell Twilight is focused on you
  75. >"So... Anon. What is bacon?"
  76. >Fuuuuuck
  77. >Let's get this over with
  78. Listen Twilight, I belong to a sentient species. We call ourselves Homo Sapiens...or human is the non-scientific term
  79. >She leans in, clearly very interested in everything you have to say.
  80. We have many different...tastes in food. We eat fruits, vegetables, berries...and we also eat meat
  81. >Her eyes widen
  82. Waitwaitwait a minute, come on. Let me explain before you freak out
  83. >She leans away and you still see some hint of fear from her
  84. As with other carnivores, I can't fulfill my body's dietary protein requirement on plants alone. I need a generous supply of protein to live, and the only way to fulfill that requirement is on meat.
  85. >That did nothing to comfort her. She looks like she's about to scream any second
  86. >Thinkthinkthink
  87. But, I want you to know that we don't eat ponies. And almost all of us have strong feelings about killing another living things.
  88. >She starts to settle down, and only looks slightly uncomfortable
  89. >"Ok. There's not much I can do about changing your physiology. BuI think Fluttershy can help you there. She takes care of plenty of animals, mostly herbivores, but some... are carnivorous in nature. I'll ask about that when we get back to Ponyville."
  90. I would greatly appreciate that. Thanks for understanding.
  91. >"It's what friends do." Her smile returns and she is no longer visually uncomfortable.
  92. >The waiter comes back with your food and Twilight gives him a few gold coins
  93. >You asshole
  94. >You could've been a vegetarian
  95. >Fuck that noise
  96. >I'm not changing anything if I can help it
  97. >You may have to defend human nature more then
  98. >....Don't care
  99. >You dig into your salad
  100. >It's DELICIOUS
  101. >Less than 2 minutes later, it's gone.
  102. So when are we supposed to get back to this... Ponyville?
  103. >"There's actually a train to there in half an hour. The Princess made arrangements for us to take it."
  104. How long will it take?
  105. >"It should be about a 3 hour long ride."
  106. >GROAN
  107. >She giggles and finishes her sandwich
  108. >And like that, the two of you are off to the train station. And your shoulder couldn't agree more.