A Guy, A Lyre, and a Park Bench -Chapter 8-

>You sit on a park bench in the middle of the night, Lyra next to you.

>Well, she's next to you, but at the moment she's forced a kiss onto your face.

>For a split second, you wonder what will happen if you just go with it.

>But then your judgement kicks in and you break away from her lips.

>The look on her face is confused, and her eyes look hopefully up into yours.

>"So... what's it going to be?"

"I... uh... I think I'm gonna need some time to process all of this."

>Her ears sway in different directions as she contemplates your words.

>"Maybe this wasn't the best time to bring up Bon-Bon's and mines bet, huh?"

"I just think that a lot of this is happening a little fast, don't you?"

>Lyra shrugs.

>"Listen, Anon, it's no big deal. Really."

"Really? Really?! Who the hell makes a bet to see who falls for who first? That's... I mean what?!"

>"We both like you. I suggested we just compete with each other to see who can win you over first, that's all."

"...this is so fucked."

>You put your head into your hands and sigh, trying to gather yourself.

>The night was just supposed to be a dinner date, not some weird love-triangle ultimatum.

 

>"You know, you don't HAVE to decide tonight."

"What?"

>"That's be a bit unfair. I mean, you haven't really gotten to know Bon-Bon that much, and I'm just too irresistible to begin with, so.."

>She waggles her eyebrows comically.

>It was as if she was taking this whole situation nonchalantly.

"You seem way too calm about all of this, honestly."

>Another shrug as she leans back onto the bench.

>"That'd because I'm pretty confident, is all. I can take my time, and you can certainly do the same. Either way, we won't be bothered by who you choose."

>The stare you give her is one of disbelief and confusion.

"Let me get this straight. I'm stuck trying to choose between two mares that both have a thing for me. They both KNOW that they have a thing for the same guy, and instead of confronting each other about it in a dramatic fashion, you two have decided to let me decide over a period of time while you both try to woo me as passive aggressively as possible. That about right?"

>"That's about it, yeah."

"I don't know whether to be excited or terrified."

>"Why not both?"

>Huh.

>That could work.

 

>The two of you sit there for a couple of minutes while you run this through your head.

>Lyra, the snarky, peppy musician with an obsession for smoothies and evenings in the park.

>Bon-Bon, the deadpan, monotone, shy chocolatier with a soft spot for dramatic crime thrillers and, apparently, you.

>These were your choices.

>Well.

>Great.

>Lyra clears her throat and looks to you, catching your attention.

>"Soooo... the kiss? How was it?"

"...wha-"

>"Too rushed? It was too rushed wasn't it? I tried to go with the whole, "surprise him with a kiss" thing that Bon-Bon did, but it's not a very good surprise if I, you know, flat out tell you I'm about to kiss you."

>She smiles weakly while shrugging.

>Still peppy and sarcastic as ever, even with the current circumstances.

"Going home now."

>"Hm?"

"Home. Going home. Me. Home. Going to it."

>You get up and start walking to the house, while Lyra scrambles off the bench and catches up to you.

>"Whoa whoa wait are you mad?"

"Nope. Just going home. It's late, gotta a sleep."

>"Seriously, dude, if you're upset just let me know."

"Lyra, really, I'm good. Couldn't be better. There's just one thing that's bugging me."

>"And that is?"

>You sigh as you say the strangest thing you've ever spoken.

"My life is turning into an anime."

>The only way this could get any more cliche is if they competed to see who cooked a better breakfast for you.

 

The Next Morning

 

>You're woken up by the sound of someone knocking on the door to your attic bedroom.

>Stumbling out of bed while rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you make your way to the panel in the floor and let down the creaky ladder.

>Bon-Bon sits at the entrance to your bedroom.

>"Hey."

"Morning."

>"Coming up."

"Wha-"

>Before you can react she's made her way up the ladder and is trotting past you to your nightstand, sitting on your bed.

"Uh... okay, yeah. Come on in. Not like I was sleeping or anything."

>"It's breakfast time."

"Okay, cool. Then why did you come into my room if all you wanted to do was tell me that it was time to eat?"

>"Quick talk."

"Quick talk?"

>"Quick."

"Promise?"

>"Yup."

>You stare at her for a second before sighing and giving in, sitting next to her on your bed.

"Okay, what's up?"

>"She's revealed the bet to you, hasn't she?"

>You give a grunt of a laugh.

"Yup."

>"I knew it."

"So now that I know about this little competition, what are you gonna do?"

>She looks to you, deadpan.

>"Just keep calm and carry on as usual I guess."

"What, no special treatment now that I know you have a crush on me?"

>"Nope. Just going to act like I always do."

>With this said, she gets up and trots to the ladder.

>You smile.

>Bon-Bon always seemed to be the only level headed thing in this house.

>Good.

>You needed some semblance of normalcy.

>"By the way."

"Hm?"

>"We're cooking you breakfast. To see who's you like more."

>...

>God dammit.

 

>You give a groan and follow Bon-Bon back downstairs and into the kitchen.

>Lyra was waiting there, a chef's hat on her head.

"Why are you wearing a chef hat?"

>LYRA: "I'm cooking, aren't I?"

"You don't need a chef's hat to cook, though."

>LYRA: "What? Of course you do, don't be stupid."

"I'm not! Bon-Bon, help me out he-"

>Bon-Bon is wearing a pink apron with the words, "Kiss the Cook" on it.

>Also, she's wearing a matching hat.

>But she still has that expressionless face of hers.

"What... what are we doing? What is this?"

>BON: "Sit."

"But I-"

>LYRA: "Sit."

>You want to retort, but you shut your yap and sit at the table, your chin in your hand.

"Now what?"

>LYRA: "Now we cook waffles!"

"Waffles?"

>BON: "Do you not know what a waffle is?"

"No, I know what a waffle is."

>BON: "Could've fooled me."

>She smirks and goes to the kitchen counter with Lyra as the two of them prepare breakfast.

>This was just silly.

>Competing to see who made better waffles?

>Really?

>It's only until you smell the delicious fried batter that your stomach makes you reconsider.

>Well... maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

>I mean, when would you ever have two mares vying for your affection again?

>Never, that's when.

>So you resign to all of this in your mind, deciding to just deal with it for the time being.

 

>The two of them return to you, a plate in Bon-Bon's mouth while Lyra floats hers over to you with magic.

>The plates are now in front of you, and you can feel your stomach rumble at the sight of the waffles.

>Lyra has made a stack of fluffy blue-berry pancakes with maple syrup.

>Bon-Bon has made chocolate chip waffles with butterscotch syrup.

>Lrya looks to you eagerly, while Bon-Bon simply waits for you to eat something.

>You decide to eat Lyra's first, if only to get her to stop smiling that hard.

>Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise at how good this all tastes. The blueberries are a great addition and pack a nice little punch of flavor.

>You nod to Lyra, your mouth full.

"Thanksh. Thish ish good."

>BON: "Swallow."

>You and Lyra look to Bon-Bon.

>BON: "What? I can't care about manners all of a sudden?"

>You shrug and swallow down the food.

>Then you turn your attention to Bon-Bon's waffles.

>As soon as you start to cut into them, Bon'Bon's ears perk up in anticipation.

>Wow.

>These were...

>Is there... is there something in the chocolate?

"Bon-Bo-"

>BON: "Swallow."

>You do.

"Bon-Bon, this is great. But the chocolate, what is that? Did you put something into it?"

>BON: "Home recipe. Made it at the candy shop last night. There's mint in it, but not too much to make it overbearing."

"Well it shows, this is great."

>You smile and take another bite.

>Bon-Bon grins and looks over to Lyra, a smirk on her face.

>Lyra rolls her eyes and groans.

>LYRA: "So I got beat by the pony that actually MAKES food as a job. No surprise."

"I wouldn't say that. They're both great, really."

>Lyra seems to cheer up at this, and the two of them join you at the table.

 

"You know, I don't think I've had someone make me breakfast in a long time."

>LYRA: "Really?"

"Yeah. Last time a pony made me breakfast was when I was still dating-"

>You stop talking right then and there, glancing to the two of them.

>Lyra's ears are perked in curiosity, as well as Bon-Bon's.

"...what?"

>BON: "You've dated a pony before?"

"Oh."

>Oh.

>Fuck.

>You didn't mean to let that slip.

"Uh... yeah. Yeah I did."

>Lyra's face grows an enormous grin and she scoots her chair in to get closer to you.

>LYRA: "You HAVE to tell us now. You just have to."

"I don't want to talk about it."

>LYRA: "Oh you can't just hint at something like that and NOT expect us to be curious. C'mon, spill the beans already."

>BON: "Was it someone here in Ponyville?"

"Look, guys, I really don't want to get into that right now. It was a messy break up, she had a massive ego, and I've moved on. Besides, it happened like, a year ago. It's not important."

>Lyra pouts and sticks out her tongue.

>LYRA: "Party pooper."

"That's all you're getting out of me. Sorry."

>LYRA: "We WILL learn your secrets, Anonymous. Mark my words. Right Bon-Bon?"

>Bon-Bon nods.

>BON: "That we shall."

>Wow that as eerie.

>Bon-Bon's evil glare disappears as she asks you a new question.

>BON: "Don't you have work today?"

>Oh shit!

>You leap from the table and run out of the house, a waffle still in your mouth.

>Roseluck was supposed to come back to town today, so that means the cafe would re-open.

>And here you were, almost an hour late.

>Great.

 

That Night

 

"Ma'am, please, you need to leave."

>"No."

"Ma'am this is getting us nowhere. You know we don't serve that drink here, you need to stop coming here and asking for it. Besides, it's closing time. You need to leave."

>"Nnnnnnnno."

"Boss? Boss can you please help me out here?"

>Roseluck pokes her head out of her office and walks up to you and the magenta mare that's lying on top of a table.

>ROSE: "Miss, please go."

>"No."

>ROSE: "Miss please."

>"I came for berry punch. I WANT my berry punch."

"We don't HAVE berry pu-"

>"MAAAAAAAAAAAAKE SOOOOOOOOOOME."

"Boss I cannot take this. She keeps coming back. It... it just. Keeps. Happening."

>ROSE: "Okay, fine. I'm giving you permission to throw her out."

"Really?"

>ROSE: "Yes. Don't hurt her though."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

>You pick up the mare and sling her over your shoulder.

>"Where're we goin?"

"outside."

>"Why?"

"There's berry punch out there."

>"Oh wow really?!"

"Nope."

>You drop her on the curb of the side walk and take off your apron, hanging it on a hanger in the cafe, and leave.

>This whole day was just perfect.

>Wake up to feuding mares, end it with a persistent drunk one.

>It could NOT get worse.

 

>"Anon! Hey!"

>You look across the street and see Lyra and Bon-Bon waving at you, motioning for you to go to them.

>Shrugging, you decide to join them.

>Maybe they'd cheer you up, you dunno.

"Ladies."

>LYRA: "Evenin'."

>BON: "Hey."

"What's up? Why are you out this late?"

>LYRA: "Well I was at band practice when our drummer, Ditzy, told me that there'd be a show going on in the courtyard tonight."

"Show? Like a concert?"

>LYRA: "Nah nothing of the musical variety. Just some sort of magic show."

"Oh. Cool."

>LYRA: "Yup! So, I grabbed Bon-Bon from home and decided that we should go see it."

>BON: "She interrupted my TV time."

"What was on."

>BON: "Criminal Minds."

"Oh Lyra, for shame."

>LYRA: "She records every episode. EVERY. ONE. She can do without her TV tonight."

>BON: "I am thoroughly disappointed in your reasoning process."

>LYRA: "So, Anon. Wanna come?"

>You mull it over in your head.

"Sure, why not?"

>LYRA: "Great! C'mon, the show should start soon."

>As the three of you make your way to the courtyard, you feel as though this is all pretty nice.

>They weren't trying to win you over at the moment.

>All of you were just spending a nice evening out, is all.

>A smile creeps across your face.

>No matter where your feelings lie, you could always count on these two to be your friends.

>That was a comforting thought.

>Besides, you hadn't seen a magic show since...

>...

>Oh.

>Oh NO.

>The three of you make it to where the courtyard is, a large wooden caravan sitting square in the center of it all.

>It is at this point that you want to get the hell out of dodge.

>Now.

"Hey you know what? I'm really tired. Yeah, tired. Let's just go home."

>Lyra looks to you confusedly.

>LYRA: "But we JUST got here. And the show hasn't even star-"

"Ah you know seen one magic show seen 'em all, come on let's just go home and go to bed huh? Boy am I tired."

>BON: "You're nervous."

"What? Nervous? Why would I be- no I'm not. Nope, not nervous at all. Just really, really tired."

>BON: "Then why are you talking at a million miles an hour?"

"Pffffft what? Noooo I'm just- I don't know what you're- hey why don't we just go-"

>Suddenly light and sparks fly out of the caravan as it bursts open, a large grand drape pulling back as a voice booms from within it.

>Oh god no.

>"Greetings, Ponyville! It is I, the GREAT and POWERFUL TRIXIE!"

>Just slink away, Anon.

>"I return to your sleepy little town to yet again amaze you with-"

>Slink away before she-

>"...Anonymous?"

>Aww nuts.

>Trixie bounds off the stage, a grin on her face as she approaches the three of you.

>TRIX: "I thought I recognized you! How have you been? Still a busboy down at that little cafe I presume?"

"Oh... hey Trixie, didn't know you were in town."

>Lyra looks from you to Trixie, a confused look on her face.

>LYRA: "Wait, Anon, you know her?"

"Ah... you could say that, yeah."

>TRIX: "Oh come now, you're still not upset at our little falling out are you?"

>LYRA: "Falling out?"

"Uh."

>BON: "You've got to be bucking kidding me."

>All of you turn to Bon-Bon, a look of annoyed shock on her face.

>BON: "You dated HER?"

"UH."

>Lyra spins around to you, her expression the exact opposite of Bon-Bon's.

>She's tittering like a school girl.

>LYRA: "Wait wait wait, really? Rrrreeeaaallly?!"

>TRIX: "The GREAT and POWERFUL TRIXIE cannot believe that her snuggle bear would try to deny the fact that we were an item! Really, Anon, you seem to be still horribly broken up about it."

>LYRA: "Snuggle Bear!? A pet name?!... Oh my god, you were the BOTTOM BITCH!"

>Lyra bursts out into laughter, while Bon-Bon just stares at you , wide eyed and serious.

>This...

>This wasn't going to end well.

 

~END~