Title:           Fluffy Meets Pony
Author:          PPPone
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/YD7wMF2n
First Edit:      Wednesday 16th of May 2012 07:33:14 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Wednesday 16th of May 2012 07:33:14 PM CDT

>Fluffy Meets Pony
 
>Have a fluffy.
>He’s straw-colored with a dark green mane and you named him Wheat.
>You and Wheat watch a kid’s show about farm life on TV.
>He’s fascinated by the “not fwuffies” (things like cows, goats, and horses) and “othew fwuffies” (sheep and alpacas) he sees.
>He was born in a shelter and thus has never seen actual farm animals.
>Decide that some cultural enrichment is in order.
>Find a “working farm” that allows fluffies on a leash or fluffy-pack.
>Go there one fine spring morning.
>Now that he sees them in person, Wheat is terrified of the “munstas”.
>After tons of encouragement, he finally reaches out with a trembling hoof and pets a cow’s nose.
>Still too scared to feed the animals, so he watches you do it.
>Also eats some of the carrot sticks you brought for the horses.
>Drinks fresh milk from a cow.
>You let him down from his fluffy-pack and put him on his leash, letting him trundle along next to the pony enclosure.  
>Meet a hot chick who also has a fluffy pony.
>Strike up a conversation, taking your eyes off of Wheat.
>After all, he’s on a leash, so what could possibly…
>Shrieking panic.
>”Nuuuu!  Owwies!  Daddy!”
>Wheat has squeezed under the bottom of the fence into the pony enclosure.
>His leash is stuck under a trough and he can’t run away.
>A pony (a real pony) is ripping off big hunks of Wheat’s fluff and chewing them.
>”Hewp!  Munsta eat Wheat!  Pwease no owwies, munsta!”
>Apparently the pony thought the gold fluff was hay and the green fluff alfalfa, or something.
>You’re forced to hop the fence, physically push the pony away, and free Wheat’s leash.
>By this time, staff are arriving.
>Wheat is shivering and hiccupping, moaning in pain.
>He’s missing big hunks of fluff, and many of the places it was ripped away are bleeding.
>”Owwies.”  He whines.  “Why musta take fwuff?  Fwuffy cowd.”
>You take him to the vet.
>Wheat will be fine.  
>However, some of his skin was damaged and the fluff won’t re-grow there.
>Might need a sweater in the winter to make up for lost fluff.
>You look at your patchy, asymmetrical pet and shake your head.
>Stupid pony ruined fluffy!