Oneshots

By: Ordnung on Dec 8th, 2012 | syntax: None | size: 24.59 KB | hits: 149 | expires: Never

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>You are Ordnung
>Day Saturday on Earth
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Go downstairs
>Many Anons from the Flutterrape threads are here
H-hello guys...
>Silence
>One speaks up
>"Hey..."
>Knock on the door
>Guess what?
>It's yellow quiet!
>"Hi, Ordnung."
Hey
>More silence
>"Can I come in?"
S-sure
>She follows you in, seeing the other Anons
>"So many Anons!"
Um... Would you... like to cuddle with us?
>"Uh... okay."
>You bring in everybody for a big cuddle
>It feels warm
>"Hey, Ordnung?"
Yeah?
>"Where are all of the other writers?"
Silly Fluttershy. They're all at the gay bathhouse.
>Day 1 more year closer to death in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>The rest of your morning goes by
>That's strange
>Fluttershy's usually here by now
>Hear knock on the door
>ohboyherewego.tiff
>It's actually Twilight
>Why is she here?
>"Anon, I have some terrible news."
Terrible news? What is it?
>"It's what airs on TV, but that's not important right now. Fluttershy's dead!"
>You gasp
>She was a creep, but she didn't deserve to die
>Later, you, Fluttershy's animals, and friends are at her funeral
>Rarity walks up to you with a note and gives it to you
>"Darling, Fluttershy said she wanted to give you this note after she died, and she wanted nop0ny else to read it. She loved you so much."
>You open up the note
>Read it
>"Is necrophilia your fetish?"
>...
>Punch Rarity across the room
>Throw Fluttershy's corpse into the river outside
>Light the funeral house and the daycare center next to it on fire
>Go home
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day fuck I can't even think of anything to put here in Equestria
>Wake up
>Fuck, what is the normal morning routine?
>Go downstairs
>What usually happens next in the story?
>Hear a knock on the door
>Now I'll never know what happens next...
>Answer it
>It's goddamn what's-her-face
>"Anon, is amnesia your fetish?"
I don't remember.
>"D-does that mean-"
Who are you?
>"What?"
Huh?
>"When?"
Why?
>You two just stare at each other for hours
>It's nightfall
Hey, what's-your-face.
>"Yes, talking monkey?"
What should go after this part of the story?
>"Well, I'm looking at previous stories in the thread and they all end in '>Fucking Fluttershy,' so...um...do we fuck?"
That seems to be the only logical conclusion.
>You two go upstairs in your bedroom
>And here, the story ends, with you,
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day irritated eyes in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Grab a bowl of Big-Mac-Os
>No
>Fuck that
>You're making some goddamn pancakes
>Knock knock
Who's there?
>"It's me, Fluttershy."
Fluttershy who?
>"Just please answer it, Anon"
>You open the door
>Fluttershy is equipped with some sort of backpack with a hose attached to it
>It's labeled "Hydrochloric Acid"
>She shoots you in the eyes with it
>"So, are burning eyes yo-"
AAAAAAHHHHHH
AHHH IT'S IN MY EYES
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
>You are stumbling outside
>Blinded
>Still screaming
>And you're flailing your arms
>You smack Fluttershy to the ground
>You start heading to P0nyville
>To a construction site
AAAAAAHHHHHH
>You walk onto a girder
>It's lifted up by a pulley as you walk on it
>You walk onto the building being worked on
>As you walk, a wrecking ball barely misses you
AAAAHHHHHH
>You walk into a tube
>It turns and leads you to an elevator
>You walk into the elevator as it takes you back to ground level
>You've upset the building so much, it collapses
>It lands on you
>You are impaled by a girder
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day who the fuck would major in underwater basket weaving in Equestria
>You are the laziest anon ever to exist
>Wake up
>Lie in bed for about 30 minutes before actually getting up
>Shit on the floor
>Fuck, the bathroom's too far away
>Eat some slices of cheese for breakfast
>That's weird, Fluttershy usually kno-
>Hear a knock
>There we go
>Answer the door
>No one
>Hear the knock again
>It's coming from your bathroom
>Dafuq?
>Your legs have had too much for the day
>You take out your handy-dandy grappling hook
>Grapple onto the bathroom door upstairs
>Open it
>Fluttershy's head is sticking out of your toilet
>"Are you sick today, Anon? One of your warm, cute, and wonderful pieces of poop usually comes from your pipes and into my bedroom by now."
I shit on the floor today.
>"Okay, good. Can I have it?"
Sure.
>Fluttershy walks out of your toilet
>Which reveals that she actually has a spider body with a big pony head
>Spidershy slings her web and grabs your shit
>"Thank you!"
>You say nothing and flush that bitch down the toilet
>Fucking Flutterweb
>Day Happy Happy Joy Joy in Equestria!
>Wake up on the right side of the bed!
>Oh joy, another beautiful day to spend with my friends!
>You skip to the bathroom while whistling!
>Make sure to scrub everywhere in the shower!
>Brush your teeth because you don't want cavities!
>You gargle your mouthwash while still humming!
>Shave so you look nice and clean!
>You hear a wondrous knock on the door!
Oh, that must be my friend, Fluttershy!
>Better get dressed!
>How embarrassing to be naked at the door!
>Your animal friends help dress you!
>Just like in a Disney movie!
>You moonwalk to the door in such a silly willy manner!
Hi, Fluttershy, old buddy, old pal!
>"Hi, Anon! Wanna play with me?"
I'd absolutely, positively love to!
>You two race each other to the middle of a field!
>You won the race! You were the fastest!
Haha! Better luck next time, Flutterwutter!
>"I've been improving!"
>You two grab both of each other's hooves/hands in such a lovely manner!
>It's so sweet!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTvhWVTwRnM
>You two spin around in circles for hours!
>Silly Billy Flutterwilly!
>Day Shit I need to eat breakfast instead of writing this in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Get on computer
>Start writing in the Flutterrape thread
">Day Shit I need to eat breakfast instead of writing this in Equestria..."
>Fluttershy bursts through ceiling
>"Anon, are recursive stories yo-"
No
>Continue writing story
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day Bad Joke in Equestria
>Wake up
>Yadda yadda yadda
>Fluttershy breaks your door down
>Walks up to you in the kitchen
Fluttershy, what the fuck?
>"I just came in here to ask you something."
What?
>"Is dendrophilia your fetish?"
>Then all you hear is a laugh track so obnoxious, the Big Bang Theory would be jealous
>You can hear clapping as the audience's sides are reaching maximum warp
>Everyp0ny in Equestria can hear the laugh track
>They're all covering their ears
>"Make it stop! Make it stop!"
>"Good heavens, what is that dreadful noise?"
>All the glasses and windows break
>Twilight comes in
>"I'll stop it!"
>She attempts a volume control spell, but it just sends her back flying conveniently into Celestia's throne room
>"Celestia, help us!"
>"I'm sorry; I cannot."
>"Why not?"
>Before Celestia can say anything, her face starts to melt and there is soon nothing left of her except her bones
>The audience's sides have all grown and combined into a giant, interdimensional-travel-capable monster
>The monster then proceeds to eat all of reality as we know it
>There is nothing that exists but sides
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day Bronchitis in Equestria
>You are lung
>You don't wake up because you never sleep
>Sleep is for the weak
>It's still dark outside
>You crawl out of the dumpster you were resting in
>It had a bunch of rats you could eat for food
>Shit was tasty
>You even had one in your clutch right now
>Well, the head, anyway
>You add it to the rat head collection you hang behind the dumpster
>Time to move
>You muster up some air and proceed to fly your way to Fluttershy's house
>You loved Fluttershy
>Not for who she is, but because she tormented your master, Anon
>What a bastard, always keeping you in his chest
>You reach Fluttershy's cottage
>Trying to decide which way to go in, you decide to go in through the chimney
>Ho ho ho, motherfucker
>While you're in the holiday mood, why not eat some cookies?
>Plus, you're fucking hungry
>You raid Fluttershy's fridge and eat all of her cookies
>Fucking delicious
>You go upstairs into Fluttershy's room
>A lung's gotta please his woman
>You crawl into her bed and make your way up her pussy
>It's a tight squeeze, but you manage to sneak in there
>Fluttershy moans in pleasure, but is still asleep
>"Oh, Anon!"
>Did she just say, "Anon?"
>Bitch, I'm lung
>Holy fuck, you're mad
>You begin ripping her insides
>You throw her reproductive system out her hole
>She's still moaning in pleasure
>"Aaahh!"
>You eat her stomach, and pummel her kidneys
>Then you decide to go Tasmanian Devil on her
>You make a tornado inside her body, which kills her
>Bitch
>You crawl out of her mouth
>Grab the nearest scythe
>Cut her head off
>Take it back to your dumpster to add to the rat head collection
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day What's Up in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Eat breakfast
>Daily knock on the door
What, Fluttershy?
>No answer
Hm...
>Open door
>Nop0ny
That's strange
>Step outside
>Take a deep breath
>Get real high
>Scream at the top of your lungs
What's going on?!
>Fluttershy pops out of a bush
>"Are 4 Non Blondes your fetish?"
No
>Go back inside
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day The Termiraper in Equestria
>You are Ordnung
>You and Fluttershy are rapist partners for life
>Ever since that whole "CMC rape" fiasco
>Getting hot monkey dick and sweet pony ass
>Wake up
Morning, Flutters.
>"Good morning, Ordnung."
>You both do the morning routine
>Together, at the same time
>It was awesome
>Shower sex!
>Anyways, you both go downstairs after finishing and look at the calendar
>"Who's next?"
You know who it is.
>You rip off yesterday's date (which was the CMC) to reveal...
>picklehead42!
>"Oh boy, that sounds like fun! Teehee."
You bet.
>"How are we going to get him?"
I know.
>"What?"
It'll be a surprise.
>"I like surprises."
Me too, Flutters, me too.
>You go to the fridge and grab [hiddenitem]
>You place it in your backpack
Let's go.
>Later, you go to the Everfree Forest where picklehead usually hangs out
>He said something about deforestation and building a pickle empire
>Where is he?
>You're walking in the forest for what seems like miles
>The only sense of direction you and Fluttershy had was the smell of pickles
>After a long trek, you reach picklehead weeping on the ground
>He's holding a pickle in his hand and looks paranoid
What do you think is wrong with him?
>You whisper
>"I don't know; let's find out."
>You both walk up to picklehead
Um...picklehe-
>"HALT! Who goes there?"
It's us, Ordnung and Fluttershy.
>"Ordwho and Whattershy? I don't know you? Where is my pickle jar? I want my pickle jar!"
>He's swinging his pickle at you
>"Back, you crazy beasts! I know picklefu!"
>He gains a fighting stance that would make Justin Bieber laugh
>"What's picklef-"
>"IT'S WHAT'S GOING TO GET MY PICKLE JAR BACK, THAT'S WHAT!"
>He looks pissed now
Picklehead, calm down. We'll help you find your pickle jar.
>"You will?"
>He raises his arms up in the air, as if thanking the heavens
>"Oh, glorious day! Thank you kind sir and madam!"
>He crawls towards you
>He begins kissing your feet and Fluttershy's hooves
On one condition.
>He looks up at you
>"What is it? Anything!"
>You and Fluttershy give each other a look and smile.
Picklehead...
>"Yes?"
>"We think it's about time you..."
Went bananas!
>You pull out a banana bunch
>"Oh, no no no no no no no no..."
>He's backing away
>Fluttershy pounces on him and nails him to the ground
>"Please, oh sweet Celestia, no! My one weakness!"
Let's go apeshit.
>You take bananas off the bunch one by one
>Shoving each one into every orifice of picklehead
>He has bananas sticking out of his hears
>Two in his nostrils
>A few in his mouth
>And the rest up his virgin ass
>"Mmmph! Mmmmmmmmmph!"
>Tears are rolling down his cheeks as the bananas burn his body
>His skin is steaming hot
>"Ordnung, I think he's in heat."
Hahaha. Good one.
>"Haha."
>You both begin licking picklehead's burning body
>The bananas are too strong for him
>Your saliva helps cool him down
>You both take turns using the bananas as dildos
>Fluttershy eventually gets on picklehead's body and starts shoving her tongue in his mouth
>You begin having a cockfight with his penis using a banana
>The rape goes on for quite a while during the night
>Until eventually, picklehead is full of your semen and literally cannot take anymore
>It's dripping out of his nose, mouth, and anus
>He's just whimpering in horror
>His body has turned all yellow, the color of a banana
>It's going to take while for that to heal
Hey, picklehead.
>He just looks at you
Your pickle jar is right behind you
>And you were right
>It has been there the whole time
>He grabs the jar, still in shock
>"Well, that was fun. Let's go home. Bye, picklehead!"
Bye, picklehead!
>You both wave and continue back home
>It feels great knowing that you finally were
>Fucking picklehead42
>Day The Cheapest Strategy in Equestria
>Wake up
>Enter bathroom
>Pointed stones dug into Anon!
>Look at your health bar
>You lose 1/8 of your health
Ouch! What the fuck?!
>Fluttershy's head bursts through your bathroom floor, so her head is just sticking out of a hole in it.
>Pointed stones dug into Fluttershy!
>She loses 1/4 of her health
>"Yipe!"
What is it now, Fluttershy?
>"I was just wondering if Stealth Rock was your fetish."
No! Now, get rid of it!
>"Whatever you want, babe."
>Fluttershy begins rapidly spinning in your bathroom, getting rid of those damned rocks
Great, now get out.
>"Wanna trade fluids?"
Out.
>"I have a shiny flank."
>She begins to shake her butt
Now.
>"Alright, same time tomorrow?"
>You don't answer
>She smiles
>"Buh-bye, honey."
>She leaves
>Fucking Smogonshy
>Day Hey Cousin in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Eat breakfast
>Go outside and steal the nearest car
>"Hey!"
>Throw that bitch out
>Run over as many ponies as you can
>4 stars and police are after you
Shit.
>While driving away, you crash into town hall
Fuck!
>Jump out of the car
>It catches on fire and explodes
>Cops are still after you
>Bring out your phone
>Go to the cheats menu
>Get shot by a cop
Fucking hell.
>Put away your phone
>Duck behind car
>Quack quack
>Bring out phone again and go to cheats
>Delete your 4 stars
>The cops suddenly get amnesia
>"Why are we chasing this guy again?"
>"I don't know; let's get some donuts."
>They all leave
>Someone calls your phone
>Answer it
>"H-hey, Anon! W-want to go b-bowling?"
NO, FOR THE LAST TIME, I DON'T WANT TO GO FUCKING BOWLING!
>"So is bowling not your fetish?"
>Hang up
>Fuck some slut on the street instead of
>Fucking Romanshy
>Day Shit Bang Theory in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Sit in your spot on the couch
>You're too autistic to sit anywhere else
>Start eating french toast
>Laugh track
>Fluttershy walks in the door
>Laugh track
>"Anon, how do I internet?"
Delte syst 32
>"What?"
Bazspinga
>Laugh track
>"What's your wifi code? lol Im a nurd cuz I no wat wifi be."
Check yur fone.
>"What's a fone?"
Bizberger
>Laugh track
--------------------
>You and Fluttershy stare in disgust at the abomination on the TV
Fluttershy, what the fuck did we just make?
>"I don't know, but is making bad TV shows with your lover your fetish?"
No. Get out.
>You scruff Fluttershy and throw her out the window
>Then you take the disc out of the CD player and break it in half
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day Electric Soldier Fluttergon in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>No knock on the door
>But Fluttershy bursts out of the socket in the wall
>"Hi, Anon!"
What the fuck?
>"I know your fetish. I'm sure of it."
>She flashes her marehood to reveal a light socket has been placed on it
>There are wires connecting to it
>"Come here, honey bun."
>She grabs you by your head and brings you down to her marehood
>She forces you to lick the light socket
HHHHBBBTHTBHT
>You are shocked by the electricity
>Your body flashes and you can see your bones
>The shock stops and you're covered in soot
>"Are licking light sockets your fetish?"
>You get up and gather yourself
>Then you rub your feet on the carpet
>After you gather up enough static electricity, you poke Fluttershy, giving her a shock
>"Yipe!"
>She jumps and goes through the ceiling
>After that, she is sent flying off into the distance
>"Fluttershy is blasting off again!"
>Ding
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day interrupted normal routine in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower...
>The water stops for a second
What the...
>Maybe the pipe is clogged
>A yellow pegasus bursts from the pipe, breaking your shower and landing on top of you
>Fluttershy
>She gets up
>"Is showering with your lover your fetish, Anon?"
No.
>You take the cover off the drain and shove Fluttershy down the pipeline
>Finish your shower
>Shave
>Fucking Fluttershy
>"He who would cross the bridge of death must answer me these questions three!"
"Well.. Okay then."
>"WHHHAT, is your name?"
"Anon the Human."
>"WHHHHAT, is your quest?"
"To get away from Ponyville."
>"WHHHAT, is your fetish?"
>The old man is actually Fluttershy.
"What do you mean, an African or European fetish?"
>"Oh, uh, gee...I don't knoowAAAAAAaaa"
>She dies a horrible death and you aren't
>Fucking Fluttershy
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>ArewvsERgtsE
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------------------------------
Fluttershy.
>"Yes?"
Why are you on my computer?
>"I thought typing was your fetish."
No.
>"Oh well, it was too hard anyway. Hopefully you are too."
Not a chance.
>"Same time tomorrow?"
Same time tomorrow.
>She leaves your house
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day Flutterape in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Eat breakfast
>A giant, hairy animal bursts through your door
>Oh wait, it's just Fluttershy in a costume
Let me guess: you think apes are my fetish, right?
>Fluttershy squeaks
>"...yes."
It's not. Go get that stupid costume off and get a life.
>Fluttershy turns around
>"Sorry, guys."
>A bunch of Fluttershy's ape friends say, "Aw..."
>They all leave in disappointment
>Slam the door
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day December 31st on Earth
>You are partying with your friends for the New Year
>Your high school crush walks up to you
>"Hey, Anon."
H-h-h-h...
>C'mon man, get it together
Sup?
>You put on your best cocky face
>She laughs
>"Oh, Anon, you are so awkward. I kind of always liked that in you."
>You talk for a while
>She seems to be interested in you
>it'shappening.gif
>You spot Fluttershy
>She's walking up to you
>Goddammit
>Hopefully, she doesn't ruin your chances
>"Hey, boyfriend!"
I'm not your-
>"Boyfriend?"
>"Of course! We love each other so much!"
>Fluttershy hugs you
No, we're-
>"Wow, Anon. I didn't know you two were dating. You make a cute couple."
But we're not-
>"He is cute, isn't he?"
>"You're one lucky mare. Sorry to bother you, Anon. See ya."
You weren't bothering me. Please come ba-
>You hear the TV in the background
>"Five, Four, Three, Two, One!"
>The New Year starts and Fluttershy is smothering you with kisses
>And here you are, cockblocked by
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day Selene in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Open the fridge
>Fluttershy is in it
>"This time, you're mine!"
>She tackles you to the ground
Get off!
>"You won't be saying that after I prove to you I know your fetish!"
What is it this time?
>"Oh, I was just wondering if not finishing stories were your fetish."
>Day Frustration in Equestria
>You are the AVGN
>Wake up
>Shit in the toilet, shit in the shower, shit in the fucking sink
>It's all worthless garbage that bitch Fluttershy gave you anyway
>Your shower didn't get you clean enough
>The water's so fucking filthy
>You might as well have bathed in horse semen that's been digested by every mare in p0nyville twice
>You cut yourself when shaving
>That's real nice, they couldn't make a smooth razor?
>Why is it made out of wood?
>Who in the right mind would do such a thing?
>Anyway, you go down to eat breakfast, but the only thing have to eat is some mashed potatoes and apple sauce
>What are you supposed to do with these, shove the apple sauce up your ass and wait for Applejack to take a dildo to fish it out?
>You eat your apple sauce and mashed potatoes, but Flutterslut interrupts your meal with a knock on the door
>You open the door and greet her
What is it now?! You couldn't do something different every day? This is the same old shit over and over again! It gets too repetitive! It's like someone shoving your dick in a pencil sharpener constantly every day; it's painful and it fucking sucks! At least be creative!
>"S-sorry, I was just wondering if bad games were your fetish..."
>Your face twists and turns, failing to truly express your anger
AAAARRRRGGGHHHH
>You get your fucking Power Glove and return to the door
You wanna know what I think about your shitty games, Fluttershy? Well, this is what I think of them!
>You go into the woods and find the nearest bear
>You knock the bear out in one hit, what a goddamn pussy
>A voice out of nowhere says, "FINISH HIM!"
>Your nerd rage goes up to 11 and you tear out his heart right out of his chest
>Yeah, that's the stuff
>Ripping a bear's heart out after you beat him up
Now go back to where you came from.
>"O-ok-k-kay..."
>She runs off
>Fucking Fred Fuchs
>I can't take a break
>I wish the world weren't so rapid in development
>Stop and take rest for one day, get left in the dust
>Everything goes by too fast
>No time for a breather
>I try to slow it down, but only get cajoled for doing so
>Keep it up, and the world will get rid of me
>Delete my existence
>For we are a society of the here and now
>Not of the future, and everything it yields
>I try to preach about the journey, and not the result
>But nobody ever listens
------------------------------------
>You are in your bedroom on Earth, crying your eyes out
>There's no time to stop and look at the scenery
>Only time for more work
>Forced into a harsh reality
>You wish you could escape it all
>And live in fantasy
>"H-hey, Anon..."
>The answer to your prayers is beside your bed with a dark hoodie that covers her entire body except for the face
Hi, Fluttershy.
>"Why do you keep rejecting me, Anon?"
You know we could never have a relationship. You're a pony, and I'm a human. Plus, you're not real.
>"Don't be like that, please. Nothing can stop love."
Fluttershy, you're the only one who has ever cared about me. I wish I could.
>"Now, you can. Follow me."
>She extends her hoof, only to reveal that it is only a bone
>"I want you to have a chance to see a place where reality cannot harm you. A place of peace of mind and sanctuary. I love you, Anon. I cannot stand to see you in this place."
>Your hand is drawn to her bony hoof as if it had a mind of its own
>You grab it
>"You won't regret it."
>A cloud of smoke appears behind her and you both walk into it
>Finally, you rest in peace
------------------------------------
>The police and ambulance are at your house
>A cop turns to the TV camera
>"We believe it was suicide, but don't be so sure about it. There could be a deranged killer on the loose. Make sure to lock your doors windows at night."
>Doctors are taking your corpse to the ambulance
>One doctor is talking to a policeman
>"So, how is this guys funeral going to go? He has no immediate family (they're all dead), no siblings, no friends, and the person he knows best is his boss."
>"What a loner. Let's just bury him and call it a day."
------------------------------------
>Day 1 in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>You had planned a date with Fluttershy this evening, so you spruce yourself up in your nicest suit
>Rarity made it for you
>Gotta smell nice for the lady
>You put on your nicest-smelling cologne
>You straighten your tie
Ah, I hope this goes well.
>You go downstairs and open the door
>Fluttershy has her hoof up
>Apparently, you caught her right before she was going to knock
>She looks really beautiful, too
>Her hair is tied up, diamond earrings hang on her ear, and a black dress shrouds her
>"Oh, uh, hi!"
Anxious?
>"Oh, I just couldn't wait! Come on!"
>She grabs your hand and runs, dragging you, to the restaurant
>The date goes very well
>It's the end of the night, and you walk Fluttershy to her cottage
Hey, that was fun.
>"I thought so too."
>Your smile extends and you blush
So, I guess I'd better get going now. Er, unless it's okay for me to come inside, Fluttershy.
>She kisses you on the cheek
>"Come in."
>She brings you up to her bed, where you spend the rest of the night
>Fucking Fluttershy

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>You are Ordnung
>Day Saturday on Earth
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Go downstairs
>Many Anons from the Flutterrape threads are here
H-hello guys...
>Silence
>One speaks up
>"Hey..."
>Knock on the door
>Guess what?
>It's yellow quiet!
>"Hi, Ordnung."
Hey
>More silence
>"Can I come in?"
S-sure
>She follows you in, seeing the other Anons
>"So many Anons!"
Um... Would you... like to cuddle with us?
>"Uh... okay."
>You bring in everybody for a big cuddle
>It feels warm
>"Hey, Ordnung?"
Yeah?
>"Where are all of the other writers?"
Silly Fluttershy. They're all at the gay bathhouse.

>Day 1 more year closer to death in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>The rest of your morning goes by
>That's strange
>Fluttershy's usually here by now
>Hear knock on the door
>ohboyherewego.tiff
>It's actually Twilight
>Why is she here?
>"Anon, I have some terrible news."
Terrible news? What is it?
>"It's what airs on TV, but that's not important right now. Fluttershy's dead!"
>You gasp
>She was a creep, but she didn't deserve to die
>Later, you, Fluttershy's animals, and friends are at her funeral
>Rarity walks up to you with a note and gives it to you
>"Darling, Fluttershy said she wanted to give you this note after she died, and she wanted nop0ny else to read it. She loved you so much."
>You open up the note
>Read it
>"Is necrophilia your fetish?"
>...
>Punch Rarity across the room
>Throw Fluttershy's corpse into the river outside
>Light the funeral house and the daycare center next to it on fire
>Go home
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day fuck I can't even think of anything to put here in Equestria
>Wake up
>Fuck, what is the normal morning routine?
>Go downstairs
>What usually happens next in the story?
>Hear a knock on the door
>Now I'll never know what happens next...
>Answer it
>It's goddamn what's-her-face
>"Anon, is amnesia your fetish?"
I don't remember.
>"D-does that mean-"
Who are you?
>"What?"
Huh?
>"When?"
Why?
>You two just stare at each other for hours
>It's nightfall
Hey, what's-your-face.
>"Yes, talking monkey?"
What should go after this part of the story?
>"Well, I'm looking at previous stories in the thread and they all end in '>Fucking Fluttershy,' so...um...do we fuck?"
That seems to be the only logical conclusion.
>You two go upstairs in your bedroom
>And here, the story ends, with you,
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day irritated eyes in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Grab a bowl of Big-Mac-Os
>No
>Fuck that
>You're making some goddamn pancakes
>Knock knock
Who's there?
>"It's me, Fluttershy."
Fluttershy who?
>"Just please answer it, Anon"
>You open the door
>Fluttershy is equipped with some sort of backpack with a hose attached to it
>It's labeled "Hydrochloric Acid"
>She shoots you in the eyes with it
>"So, are burning eyes yo-"
AAAAAAHHHHHH
AHHH IT'S IN MY EYES
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
>You are stumbling outside
>Blinded
>Still screaming
>And you're flailing your arms
>You smack Fluttershy to the ground
>You start heading to P0nyville
>To a construction site
AAAAAAHHHHHH
>You walk onto a girder
>It's lifted up by a pulley as you walk on it
>You walk onto the building being worked on
>As you walk, a wrecking ball barely misses you
AAAAHHHHHH
>You walk into a tube
>It turns and leads you to an elevator
>You walk into the elevator as it takes you back to ground level
>You've upset the building so much, it collapses
>It lands on you
>You are impaled by a girder
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day who the fuck would major in underwater basket weaving in Equestria
>You are the laziest anon ever to exist
>Wake up
>Lie in bed for about 30 minutes before actually getting up
>Shit on the floor
>Fuck, the bathroom's too far away
>Eat some slices of cheese for breakfast
>That's weird, Fluttershy usually kno-
>Hear a knock
>There we go
>Answer the door
>No one
>Hear the knock again
>It's coming from your bathroom
>Dafuq?
>Your legs have had too much for the day
>You take out your handy-dandy grappling hook
>Grapple onto the bathroom door upstairs
>Open it
>Fluttershy's head is sticking out of your toilet
>"Are you sick today, Anon? One of your warm, cute, and wonderful pieces of poop usually comes from your pipes and into my bedroom by now."
I shit on the floor today.
>"Okay, good. Can I have it?"
Sure.
>Fluttershy walks out of your toilet
>Which reveals that she actually has a spider body with a big pony head
>Spidershy slings her web and grabs your shit
>"Thank you!"
>You say nothing and flush that bitch down the toilet
>Fucking Flutterweb

>Day Happy Happy Joy Joy in Equestria!
>Wake up on the right side of the bed!
>Oh joy, another beautiful day to spend with my friends!
>You skip to the bathroom while whistling!
>Make sure to scrub everywhere in the shower!
>Brush your teeth because you don't want cavities!
>You gargle your mouthwash while still humming!
>Shave so you look nice and clean!
>You hear a wondrous knock on the door!
Oh, that must be my friend, Fluttershy!
>Better get dressed!
>How embarrassing to be naked at the door!
>Your animal friends help dress you!
>Just like in a Disney movie!
>You moonwalk to the door in such a silly willy manner!
Hi, Fluttershy, old buddy, old pal!
>"Hi, Anon! Wanna play with me?"
I'd absolutely, positively love to!
>You two race each other to the middle of a field!
>You won the race! You were the fastest!
Haha! Better luck next time, Flutterwutter!
>"I've been improving!"
>You two grab both of each other's hooves/hands in such a lovely manner!
>It's so sweet!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTvhWVTwRnM
>You two spin around in circles for hours!
>Silly Billy Flutterwilly!

>Day Shit I need to eat breakfast instead of writing this in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Get on computer
>Start writing in the Flutterrape thread
">Day Shit I need to eat breakfast instead of writing this in Equestria..."
>Fluttershy bursts through ceiling
>"Anon, are recursive stories yo-"
No
>Continue writing story
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day Bad Joke in Equestria
>Wake up
>Yadda yadda yadda
>Fluttershy breaks your door down
>Walks up to you in the kitchen
Fluttershy, what the fuck?
>"I just came in here to ask you something."
What?
>"Is dendrophilia your fetish?"
>Then all you hear is a laugh track so obnoxious, the Big Bang Theory would be jealous
>You can hear clapping as the audience's sides are reaching maximum warp
>Everyp0ny in Equestria can hear the laugh track
>They're all covering their ears
>"Make it stop! Make it stop!"
>"Good heavens, what is that dreadful noise?"
>All the glasses and windows break
>Twilight comes in
>"I'll stop it!"
>She attempts a volume control spell, but it just sends her back flying conveniently into Celestia's throne room
>"Celestia, help us!"
>"I'm sorry; I cannot."
>"Why not?"
>Before Celestia can say anything, her face starts to melt and there is soon nothing left of her except her bones
>The audience's sides have all grown and combined into a giant, interdimensional-travel-capable monster
>The monster then proceeds to eat all of reality as we know it
>There is nothing that exists but sides
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day Bronchitis in Equestria
>You are lung
>You don't wake up because you never sleep
>Sleep is for the weak
>It's still dark outside
>You crawl out of the dumpster you were resting in
>It had a bunch of rats you could eat for food
>Shit was tasty
>You even had one in your clutch right now
>Well, the head, anyway
>You add it to the rat head collection you hang behind the dumpster
>Time to move
>You muster up some air and proceed to fly your way to Fluttershy's house
>You loved Fluttershy
>Not for who she is, but because she tormented your master, Anon
>What a bastard, always keeping you in his chest
>You reach Fluttershy's cottage
>Trying to decide which way to go in, you decide to go in through the chimney
>Ho ho ho, motherfucker
>While you're in the holiday mood, why not eat some cookies?
>Plus, you're fucking hungry
>You raid Fluttershy's fridge and eat all of her cookies
>Fucking delicious
>You go upstairs into Fluttershy's room
>A lung's gotta please his woman
>You crawl into her bed and make your way up her pussy
>It's a tight squeeze, but you manage to sneak in there
>Fluttershy moans in pleasure, but is still asleep
>"Oh, Anon!"
>Did she just say, "Anon?"
>Bitch, I'm lung
>Holy fuck, you're mad
>You begin ripping her insides
>You throw her reproductive system out her hole
>She's still moaning in pleasure
>"Aaahh!"
>You eat her stomach, and pummel her kidneys
>Then you decide to go Tasmanian Devil on her
>You make a tornado inside her body, which kills her
>Bitch
>You crawl out of her mouth
>Grab the nearest scythe
>Cut her head off
>Take it back to your dumpster to add to the rat head collection
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day What's Up in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Eat breakfast
>Daily knock on the door
What, Fluttershy?
>No answer
Hm...
>Open door
>Nop0ny
That's strange
>Step outside
>Take a deep breath
>Get real high
>Scream at the top of your lungs
What's going on?!
>Fluttershy pops out of a bush
>"Are 4 Non Blondes your fetish?"
No
>Go back inside
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day The Termiraper in Equestria
>You are Ordnung
>You and Fluttershy are rapist partners for life
>Ever since that whole "CMC rape" fiasco
>Getting hot monkey dick and sweet pony ass
>Wake up
Morning, Flutters.
>"Good morning, Ordnung."
>You both do the morning routine
>Together, at the same time
>It was awesome
>Shower sex!
>Anyways, you both go downstairs after finishing and look at the calendar
>"Who's next?"
You know who it is.
>You rip off yesterday's date (which was the CMC) to reveal...
>picklehead42!
>"Oh boy, that sounds like fun! Teehee."
You bet.
>"How are we going to get him?"
I know.
>"What?"
It'll be a surprise.
>"I like surprises."
Me too, Flutters, me too.
>You go to the fridge and grab [hiddenitem]
>You place it in your backpack
Let's go.
>Later, you go to the Everfree Forest where picklehead usually hangs out
>He said something about deforestation and building a pickle empire
>Where is he?
>You're walking in the forest for what seems like miles
>The only sense of direction you and Fluttershy had was the smell of pickles
>After a long trek, you reach picklehead weeping on the ground
>He's holding a pickle in his hand and looks paranoid
What do you think is wrong with him?
>You whisper
>"I don't know; let's find out."
>You both walk up to picklehead
Um...picklehe-
>"HALT! Who goes there?"
It's us, Ordnung and Fluttershy.
>"Ordwho and Whattershy? I don't know you? Where is my pickle jar? I want my pickle jar!"
>He's swinging his pickle at you
>"Back, you crazy beasts! I know picklefu!"
>He gains a fighting stance that would make Justin Bieber laugh
>"What's picklef-"
>"IT'S WHAT'S GOING TO GET MY PICKLE JAR BACK, THAT'S WHAT!"
>He looks pissed now
Picklehead, calm down. We'll help you find your pickle jar.
>"You will?"
>He raises his arms up in the air, as if thanking the heavens
>"Oh, glorious day! Thank you kind sir and madam!"
>He crawls towards you
>He begins kissing your feet and Fluttershy's hooves
On one condition.
>He looks up at you
>"What is it? Anything!"
>You and Fluttershy give each other a look and smile.
Picklehead...
>"Yes?"
>"We think it's about time you..."
Went bananas!
>You pull out a banana bunch
>"Oh, no no no no no no no no..."
>He's backing away
>Fluttershy pounces on him and nails him to the ground
>"Please, oh sweet Celestia, no! My one weakness!"
Let's go apeshit.
>You take bananas off the bunch one by one
>Shoving each one into every orifice of picklehead
>He has bananas sticking out of his hears
>Two in his nostrils
>A few in his mouth
>And the rest up his virgin ass
>"Mmmph! Mmmmmmmmmph!"
>Tears are rolling down his cheeks as the bananas burn his body
>His skin is steaming hot
>"Ordnung, I think he's in heat."
Hahaha. Good one.
>"Haha."
>You both begin licking picklehead's burning body
>The bananas are too strong for him
>Your saliva helps cool him down
>You both take turns using the bananas as dildos
>Fluttershy eventually gets on picklehead's body and starts shoving her tongue in his mouth
>You begin having a cockfight with his penis using a banana
>The rape goes on for quite a while during the night
>Until eventually, picklehead is full of your semen and literally cannot take anymore
>It's dripping out of his nose, mouth, and anus
>He's just whimpering in horror
>His body has turned all yellow, the color of a banana
>It's going to take while for that to heal
Hey, picklehead.
>He just looks at you
Your pickle jar is right behind you
>And you were right
>It has been there the whole time
>He grabs the jar, still in shock
>"Well, that was fun. Let's go home. Bye, picklehead!"
Bye, picklehead!
>You both wave and continue back home
>It feels great knowing that you finally were
>Fucking picklehead42

>Day The Cheapest Strategy in Equestria
>Wake up
>Enter bathroom
>Pointed stones dug into Anon!
>Look at your health bar
>You lose 1/8 of your health
Ouch! What the fuck?!
>Fluttershy's head bursts through your bathroom floor, so her head is just sticking out of a hole in it.
>Pointed stones dug into Fluttershy!
>She loses 1/4 of her health
>"Yipe!"
What is it now, Fluttershy?
>"I was just wondering if Stealth Rock was your fetish."
No! Now, get rid of it!
>"Whatever you want, babe."
>Fluttershy begins rapidly spinning in your bathroom, getting rid of those damned rocks
Great, now get out.
>"Wanna trade fluids?"
Out.
>"I have a shiny flank."
>She begins to shake her butt
Now.
>"Alright, same time tomorrow?"
>You don't answer
>She smiles
>"Buh-bye, honey."
>She leaves
>Fucking Smogonshy

>Day Hey Cousin in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Eat breakfast
>Go outside and steal the nearest car
>"Hey!"
>Throw that bitch out
>Run over as many ponies as you can
>4 stars and police are after you
Shit.
>While driving away, you crash into town hall
Fuck!
>Jump out of the car
>It catches on fire and explodes
>Cops are still after you
>Bring out your phone
>Go to the cheats menu
>Get shot by a cop
Fucking hell.
>Put away your phone
>Duck behind car
>Quack quack
>Bring out phone again and go to cheats
>Delete your 4 stars
>The cops suddenly get amnesia
>"Why are we chasing this guy again?"
>"I don't know; let's get some donuts."
>They all leave
>Someone calls your phone
>Answer it
>"H-hey, Anon! W-want to go b-bowling?"
NO, FOR THE LAST TIME, I DON'T WANT TO GO FUCKING BOWLING!
>"So is bowling not your fetish?"
>Hang up
>Fuck some slut on the street instead of
>Fucking Romanshy

>Day Shit Bang Theory in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Sit in your spot on the couch
>You're too autistic to sit anywhere else
>Start eating french toast
>Laugh track
>Fluttershy walks in the door
>Laugh track
>"Anon, how do I internet?"
Delte syst 32
>"What?"
Bazspinga
>Laugh track
>"What's your wifi code? lol Im a nurd cuz I no wat wifi be."
Check yur fone.
>"What's a fone?"
Bizberger
>Laugh track
--------------------
>You and Fluttershy stare in disgust at the abomination on the TV
Fluttershy, what the fuck did we just make?
>"I don't know, but is making bad TV shows with your lover your fetish?"
No. Get out.
>You scruff Fluttershy and throw her out the window
>Then you take the disc out of the CD player and break it in half
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day Electric Soldier Fluttergon in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>No knock on the door
>But Fluttershy bursts out of the socket in the wall
>"Hi, Anon!"
What the fuck?
>"I know your fetish. I'm sure of it."
>She flashes her marehood to reveal a light socket has been placed on it
>There are wires connecting to it
>"Come here, honey bun."
>She grabs you by your head and brings you down to her marehood
>She forces you to lick the light socket
HHHHBBBTHTBHT
>You are shocked by the electricity
>Your body flashes and you can see your bones
>The shock stops and you're covered in soot
>"Are licking light sockets your fetish?"
>You get up and gather yourself
>Then you rub your feet on the carpet
>After you gather up enough static electricity, you poke Fluttershy, giving her a shock
>"Yipe!"
>She jumps and goes through the ceiling
>After that, she is sent flying off into the distance
>"Fluttershy is blasting off again!"
>Ding
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day interrupted normal routine in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower...
>The water stops for a second
What the...
>Maybe the pipe is clogged
>A yellow pegasus bursts from the pipe, breaking your shower and landing on top of you
>Fluttershy
>She gets up
>"Is showering with your lover your fetish, Anon?"
No.
>You take the cover off the drain and shove Fluttershy down the pipeline
>Finish your shower
>Shave
>Fucking Fluttershy

>"He who would cross the bridge of death must answer me these questions three!"
"Well.. Okay then."
>"WHHHAT, is your name?"
"Anon the Human."
>"WHHHHAT, is your quest?"
"To get away from Ponyville."
>"WHHHAT, is your fetish?"
>The old man is actually Fluttershy.
"What do you mean, an African or European fetish?"
>"Oh, uh, gee...I don't knoowAAAAAAaaa"
>She dies a horrible death and you aren't
>Fucking Fluttershy

>;aoiesf
>aiSERVGser
>z,sERGsvergsss
>ArewvsERgtsE
>34dRLKfa
a;oijfe3-0
>fap'jfFf
>AEFfiojsrng4
aoiher4o98
>Wkf[a
>Fuoviaej Fjaea

------------------------------

Fluttershy.
>"Yes?"
Why are you on my computer?
>"I thought typing was your fetish."
No.
>"Oh well, it was too hard anyway. Hopefully you are too."
Not a chance.
>"Same time tomorrow?"
Same time tomorrow.
>She leaves your house
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day Flutterape in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Eat breakfast
>A giant, hairy animal bursts through your door
>Oh wait, it's just Fluttershy in a costume
Let me guess: you think apes are my fetish, right?
>Fluttershy squeaks
>"...yes."
It's not. Go get that stupid costume off and get a life.
>Fluttershy turns around
>"Sorry, guys."
>A bunch of Fluttershy's ape friends say, "Aw..."
>They all leave in disappointment
>Slam the door
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day December 31st on Earth
>You are partying with your friends for the New Year
>Your high school crush walks up to you
>"Hey, Anon."
H-h-h-h...
>C'mon man, get it together
Sup?
>You put on your best cocky face
>She laughs
>"Oh, Anon, you are so awkward. I kind of always liked that in you."
>You talk for a while
>She seems to be interested in you
>it'shappening.gif
>You spot Fluttershy
>She's walking up to you
>Goddammit
>Hopefully, she doesn't ruin your chances
>"Hey, boyfriend!"
I'm not your-
>"Boyfriend?"
>"Of course! We love each other so much!"
>Fluttershy hugs you
No, we're-
>"Wow, Anon. I didn't know you two were dating. You make a cute couple."
But we're not-
>"He is cute, isn't he?"
>"You're one lucky mare. Sorry to bother you, Anon. See ya."
You weren't bothering me. Please come ba-
>You hear the TV in the background
>"Five, Four, Three, Two, One!"
>The New Year starts and Fluttershy is smothering you with kisses
>And here you are, cockblocked by
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day Selene in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>Open the fridge
>Fluttershy is in it
>"This time, you're mine!"
>She tackles you to the ground
Get off!
>"You won't be saying that after I prove to you I know your fetish!"
What is it this time?
>"Oh, I was just wondering if not finishing stories were your fetish."

>Day Frustration in Equestria
>You are the AVGN
>Wake up
>Shit in the toilet, shit in the shower, shit in the fucking sink
>It's all worthless garbage that bitch Fluttershy gave you anyway
>Your shower didn't get you clean enough
>The water's so fucking filthy
>You might as well have bathed in horse semen that's been digested by every mare in p0nyville twice
>You cut yourself when shaving
>That's real nice, they couldn't make a smooth razor?
>Why is it made out of wood?
>Who in the right mind would do such a thing?
>Anyway, you go down to eat breakfast, but the only thing have to eat is some mashed potatoes and apple sauce
>What are you supposed to do with these, shove the apple sauce up your ass and wait for Applejack to take a dildo to fish it out?
>You eat your apple sauce and mashed potatoes, but Flutterslut interrupts your meal with a knock on the door
>You open the door and greet her
What is it now?! You couldn't do something different every day? This is the same old shit over and over again! It gets too repetitive! It's like someone shoving your dick in a pencil sharpener constantly every day; it's painful and it fucking sucks! At least be creative!
>"S-sorry, I was just wondering if bad games were your fetish..."
>Your face twists and turns, failing to truly express your anger
AAAARRRRGGGHHHH
>You get your fucking Power Glove and return to the door
You wanna know what I think about your shitty games, Fluttershy? Well, this is what I think of them!
>You go into the woods and find the nearest bear
>You knock the bear out in one hit, what a goddamn pussy
>A voice out of nowhere says, "FINISH HIM!"
>Your nerd rage goes up to 11 and you tear out his heart right out of his chest
>Yeah, that's the stuff
>Ripping a bear's heart out after you beat him up
Now go back to where you came from.
>"O-ok-k-kay..."
>She runs off
>Fucking Fred Fuchs

>I can't take a break
>I wish the world weren't so rapid in development
>Stop and take rest for one day, get left in the dust
>Everything goes by too fast
>No time for a breather
>I try to slow it down, but only get cajoled for doing so
>Keep it up, and the world will get rid of me
>Delete my existence
>For we are a society of the here and now
>Not of the future, and everything it yields
>I try to preach about the journey, and not the result
>But nobody ever listens

------------------------------------

>You are in your bedroom on Earth, crying your eyes out
>There's no time to stop and look at the scenery
>Only time for more work
>Forced into a harsh reality
>You wish you could escape it all
>And live in fantasy
>"H-hey, Anon..."
>The answer to your prayers is beside your bed with a dark hoodie that covers her entire body except for the face
Hi, Fluttershy.
>"Why do you keep rejecting me, Anon?"
You know we could never have a relationship. You're a pony, and I'm a human. Plus, you're not real.
>"Don't be like that, please. Nothing can stop love."
Fluttershy, you're the only one who has ever cared about me. I wish I could.
>"Now, you can. Follow me."
>She extends her hoof, only to reveal that it is only a bone
>"I want you to have a chance to see a place where reality cannot harm you. A place of peace of mind and sanctuary. I love you, Anon. I cannot stand to see you in this place."
>Your hand is drawn to her bony hoof as if it had a mind of its own
>You grab it
>"You won't regret it."
>A cloud of smoke appears behind her and you both walk into it
>Finally, you rest in peace

------------------------------------

>The police and ambulance are at your house
>A cop turns to the TV camera
>"We believe it was suicide, but don't be so sure about it. There could be a deranged killer on the loose. Make sure to lock your doors windows at night."
>Doctors are taking your corpse to the ambulance
>One doctor is talking to a policeman
>"So, how is this guys funeral going to go? He has no immediate family (they're all dead), no siblings, no friends, and the person he knows best is his boss."
>"What a loner. Let's just bury him and call it a day."

------------------------------------

>Day 1 in Equestria
>Wake up
>Shit, Shower, Shave
>You had planned a date with Fluttershy this evening, so you spruce yourself up in your nicest suit
>Rarity made it for you
>Gotta smell nice for the lady
>You put on your nicest-smelling cologne
>You straighten your tie
Ah, I hope this goes well.
>You go downstairs and open the door
>Fluttershy has her hoof up
>Apparently, you caught her right before she was going to knock
>She looks really beautiful, too
>Her hair is tied up, diamond earrings hang on her ear, and a black dress shrouds her
>"Oh, uh, hi!"
Anxious?
>"Oh, I just couldn't wait! Come on!"
>She grabs your hand and runs, dragging you, to the restaurant
>The date goes very well
>It's the end of the night, and you walk Fluttershy to her cottage
Hey, that was fun.
>"I thought so too."
>Your smile extends and you blush
So, I guess I'd better get going now. Er, unless it's okay for me to come inside, Fluttershy.
>She kisses you on the cheek
>"Come in."
>She brings you up to her bed, where you spend the rest of the night
>Fucking Fluttershy

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