Title:           Normal Norman - Normality is Heretical #1
Author:          Octavianon
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/3jcDBDpj
First Edit:      Tuesday 23rd of July 2013 02:16:00 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Tuesday 23rd of July 2013 02:16:00 PM CDT

>Be Imperial Guardsman Norman
>Just another number in the Canterlot 103rd Regiment
>My stupid mouth, plus the actions of one particular sanctioned psyker, has me suspect of Chaos worship, plus xenophilia
>THANKS PURPLE
>At this point, I'm just glad I haven't gotten BLAM'd
>Yet...
>Not that that will matter in the next couple of minutes, seeing as fucking orks have part of the regiment trapped in a canyon
>"The xenos come for us all, darlings! Give your worst to those uncouth ruffians and show them the might of the Imperium!" - said the most beautiful being I'd seen in my pathetic life
>My commissar...
>As the ork assault approached, I jumped behind Red's sandbag as instructed, ready to help defend his position
>His heavy bolter was a good incentive to do so as well
>"Red."
>"Hm?" - he replied
>"If we don't make, I just want you to know, it's been a pleasure killing xenos with you." - I said
>"Eeyup."
>In an instant, the air was filled with laser fire and heavy ordnance being targeted at the green horde
>Not that it did anything to stop their momentum, as they started overwhelming our positions, one after the other
>Things became even more dire as Red began firing on what had a second earlier been Orange's position
>Last thing I saw before turning away was her, beating down a number of greenskins with the butt of her lasgun
>As a "killa kan" closed in on us, I knew our time was up
>Goodbye my dear Commissar Aryan Beauty
>Atleast you didn't BLAM me
>The world suddenly started to spin as a tremendous shockwave knocked me to the ground
>Getting up, I saw a Banblade where the Kan had been a second ago, apparently having dropped from the canyon's cliffside
>"BRADICAL!" - came over the vox
>"THE BRADBLADE IS HERE TO DELIVER TEN BARRELS OF PAIN! ALL GUARDSMEN, FOLLOW ME TO GLORY!"
>On Holy Terra, high up in the Imperial Palace on the Himalaya's, sitting upon the Golden Throne, the decaying form of the Emperor cringed