Canter U: Day 37 Tuesday

>What time is it?

definitely not adventure time.

definitely not summer time

>Game time!

>Wait... game time?

"Yeah! Friday's game day! It's gonna be really big! Against UCLA!"

>Rainbow Dash smiles excitedly, and bounces in front of you.

>Twilight's reading a book right next to you.

>UCLA? They're a D1 NCAA school!

"And if we win, NCAA council's gonna promote CU to D1 next year!"

>Like one game could change that.

>You take a bite of your cereal, as you wait for Fluttershy to come out of her hall.

"Well... we gotta win. And I'm way excited, dude. And you gotta come. You owe me."

>She scoops some of your cereal, and Twilight smirks.

>You'll see about coming later. Friday's days away from now.

>You have three or four things left to take care of.

>Midterms.

>Where is Fluttershy?! Physics class starts soon.

"C-coming!"

>Not cumming.

>You three head over to the lecture halls, where Applejack's waiting for you.

"Mornin' y'all."

>You take your seats.

"Remember class... midterm's on Thursday!

 

A. Notes

B. Twilight

C. Applejack

D. Fluttershy

E. Goof off.

 

>Notes, notes, notes.

>Physics is simple.

>Just put the thing in the thing.

>You've done that before, give or take a few context points.

>It's basic algebra and calculus...

>You take a look at Applejack, and she's studiously taking notes.

>At least you know she's good at math. That's a relief.

>And... she's looking pretty nice today.

>She's... wearing a hat now?

>Indoors?

>Double standard.

>You get your phone out.

Colgate (lunch): Stop texting in class, and we'll see.

>You feel two paper balls hit the back of your head.

>Fucking Colgate.

>You open up the paper balls.

>Chemistry notes! Sweet!

 

>You head out of class, when it's over.

>Twilight skedaddles.

"I'm getting lunch with Shiny!"

>You meet up with the two health girls.

"Hey you three!"

>Colgate smiles, showing dem teeth.

"Howdy."

>You five walk to bio lab.

>Kim Chee Fong smires at you.

>And you split into your groups.

 

A. Work

B. AJ

C. Flutters

D. Health group

E. Slack Off.

 

>You head over to the next lab station.

"Hey there Anon."

"What are you up to?"

>Bored. Lab group's just boring.

>James Dean's working out for you real well.

>Gotta impress them with how much of a try hard you aren't.

"Uhh... sugar cube? We need yer help."

>You sigh and turn back to your lab group.

>And go back to the health group.

>So as you were saying.

"Anon! Those are bad habits!"

>Redheart speaks out.

"O-oh... sorry."

>Well, yeah. Being a tryhard is for lame-o's.

>Do you wanna be a lame-o?

"A-anon... if it's not too much to ask... can we have your help?"

>Fluttershy be screwin up yo game.

>You help Fluttershy.

>Any ways... as you were saying.

"Um... we're done!"

>The two girls scamper off.

"Seeya Anon! Gotta study!"

>You turn back to your lab partners.

>They're struggling.

>You sigh and carry them on your backs...

 

>2 hour break!

 

A. Library

B. Lunch

C. Dorms

 

Dash (lunch): Im down! ill meet u there

Luna (lunch): working, maybe next time

Vinyl (progress and lunch): i can take a break, ill meet u there

Colgate (lunch): [no response]

>Lunch time, mah nigga.

>You see Dash sitting next to Vinyl outside of the dining halls.

"Hey Anon!"

"Hey Anon!"

"Jinx!"

>They both shut up.

>I wonder what's for dinner.

>I mean... lunch.

>Chicken.

>And it's... not as dry as usual!

>Sweet.

>You return to the table with some ice cream and a plate of chicken and guac.

 

A. Dash

B. Vinyl

C. AJ

D. Fluttershy

 

>You turn to Fluttershy, who's not eating the chicken.

>Instead she's eating a salad.

>Since when was she a vegetarian?

"Oh... I've always been a vegetarian. You didn't know?" [spoiler]How's that for character development?[/spoiler]

>Kinda hard to know. When she's always quiet and out of the way and [spoiler]poorly represented by Anons in this thread[/spoiler]

>But... that doesn't mean she doesn't like a bit of meat here and there, right?

"I... try not to eat meat that much."

>That's not exactly what you meant.

>You're asking if she likes... the 'meat'.

"I... don't quite follow."

>Applejack and Rainbow Dash look at you funny.

>What can you say? Your innuendos don't quite meat the quota.

>You go back to your chicken.

>It's... actually kinda good!

>You keep eating.

>Fluttershy's gotta have a fetish... or some kind of sex drive at least.

>You remember that she said something about her ex boyfriend forcing her or something.

>Don't wanna go that route.

 

>You nigger on over to physics lab.

>Trixie and Twilight aren't there yet.

>You sit down.

>Now they are!

>I tried something different.

"Greetings, plebian."

"Hi there Anon."

>Twilight looks beat.

 

A. work

B. Trixie

C. Twilight

D. slack off

 

>Trixie.

>This bitch.

>Does she even know you got into silver?

>She scoffs.

"So? You're still only Silver V."

>Oh wait... she's in Gold.

>Um... also continuity issues.

>You ask her how the bois be treetin her.

>She gives an appalled sigh.

"What do you care? Boys can't resist the Great and Powerful Trixie."

>She couldn't even last through a Great and Powerful Quickie.

>She's so boring and lame, she probably rides a Great and Powerful Fixie.

>I'm done, I promise.

>You attempt to finish up lab.

>Goes well.

>Also, there are labs on midterms week now?

>Also, continuity issues.

 

>You head over to psych class.

"Remember class, the midterm!"

"Uh, Doctor D? When is it?"

>He cackles... and coughs.

>Well.

"And if you're not at the midterm, you get an F!"

>Pinkie slouches in her chair.

 

A. notes

B. pinkie

C. goof off

D. ditch

 

>You turn over to the bouncy ball of energy.

>She was slouching earlier.

>Also, continuity errors.

>It’s a hot summer day.

>And sociology class hasn’t ever been this boring.

>Wow… v-necks? Those are for losers.

>You take off your fedora and sit down, getting ready to take notes on your iPad

>You pull out your iPhone that you totally had all this time.

Colgate (new patient): well come over and check it out

>Anyway, back to Pinkie.

>How’s living solo?

“It can get pretty boring… you know how I love boring!”

>Yeah, I’m still pretty continuous.

>Oh, wait… she’s sarcastic?

“Come on, Nonny! I thought you knew me better!”

>Well, you’re pretty much living alone…

>Spike hasn’t spoken in days. All he does is play League.

“Take his bed!”

>As if you’d want Rarity sentiment-spawned semen sheets.

>Only if they’re yours.

>Class ends. Yeah! Rest of the day off!

 

A. Study

B. Vidya

C. Gym

D. Nap.

 

>It's time to move over into Gainesborough.

>Because, gains bro.

>I reuse jokes.

>I'm this late in the game, I'm entitled to.

>Game Grumps does it.

>Leno even does it.

>You knock madly on the door to the girls hall, munching on a protein bar.

>Twilight opens the door, and sees you in your semi-pro Adidas outfit.

"Rainbow! Anon wants to go to the gym!"

>Hell, looking at Twilight? Maybe she could use a bit of gym time herself.

>She's not getting fat... just... scary skinny.

>Get some meat on that shit.

"Shiny actually said he was going to get dinner... and I thought that I could join him!"

>Lol k.

"Ready to go, bro!"

>Dash comes out of her room in an dazzling dress, and high heels. Something you'd see her going to prom in.

>Just making sure you were paying attention. She's wearing her usual workout shit.

>You two run out of the hall towards the dorms.

>This jog... feels a little tougher than usual.

>You getting out of shape? Or are you just tired.

>Tired has five letters.

>Pussy has five letters.

>Bitch has five letters.

>Gains also has five letters.

 

>You work arms today.

>Although... you don't see much of Dash.

>She goes and does her own thing.

>Soccer lifting way different from normal lifting.

 

"Whew! I'm real tired."

>Rainbow leans on you as you walk back to the dorms.

>A cold Decenovoctober wind blows, and she huddles into you.

>You smirk.

>And immediately pulls away, blushing.

"B-b [spoiler]ill cosby[/spoiler]"

>You pull her in, and she rests, defeated, against your ribs."

>Need warmth somehow.

"Y-you are coming to the game... right?"

 

A. promise her.

B. pencil it in. keep it tentative

C. decline.

 

>Sore no yakusoku desu desu.

"Oh Anon-sama-kun-senpai! You make me go doki doki!"

>Anata no kanojo hanashimashita!

"Doki doki kun! I rabbu yu!"

>Rabu san sha in!

>Demmo...

>Kobayashi sama san chan.

>The Shikenpatsuhatsumatsutatsu technique needs to be learned!

"Are you serious? How do you even manage?"

>Supa kikku!

>Sokka boru!

>Yakusoku... ai shite iru.

>>>/jp/

>>>/a/

>>>/out/

 

>Back at the dorms.

>Brotein and strawberry showers.

"Thanks, dude!"

>Rainbow skips back to her hall, protein shake in hand.

>You feel awesome right now.

>According to Kanye? It's a good life.

 

A. study

B. vidya

C. girls hall

D. sleep

 

>You go over to Pinkie's-

>Wait!

>Dash needs to open the door for you... in like... 5 minutes.

"Sure thing dude. I'll be right here!"

>You text the Colgate.

Colgate (get redheart): K, she'll be right over. I gotta study.

>Redheart's here now!

>I remember when writing was all about "presenting the main ideas."

>Lol nobody's gonna like this story if...

>Redheart and you go to Pinkie's room.

>Pinkie is sick.

>Redheart uses her skills to make her feel better.

>Pinkie is happy again.

>Hey, would ya look at that! I'm done!

>[spoiler]End day 37[/spoiler]

>Pinkie's alright... she doesn't really need medical attention.

>But... a nonprofessional second opinion can't hurt.

>That's exactly what Pinkie needs! More people judging her.

>Redheart performs an extremely limited evaluation...

>Mostly because she's not very capable.

>Redheart sighs and looks at you.

"What are her habits and symptoms?"

>Liver issues. Kidney problems. Hyperactivity. Mood swings. Not having [spoiler]continuity[/spoiler]

>Breaking walls. Fast and slurred speech.

"She's partying too much."

"WHAAAAT?! NONNY!"

>What? This is for her own good.

>She starts to cry.

>Redheart awkwardly leaves.

 

A. Condone partying.

B. Chastise partying.

C. Exit.

 

>Pinkie...

>You take a nice dramatic pause to formulate your argument.

>Can't use the "you've changed" approach.

>You never really knew her before.

>Think about anyone you've ever known for 38 days.

>Oh... I mean... 38 Canter U days.

>Because time's fuckin' weird in these parts.

>But... yeah... maybe you should go with that route.

"What are you gonna say, Nonny? That I need to stop? That I'm not me anymore?"

>Dammit, the fourth wall powers.

>She sobs again.

"Well, the truth is... I'm not me! I don't want to be me! I want to be someone else!"

>Why would you want to do that?

"Because! The old Pinkie was boring! And quiet! And shy!"

>You're totally into shy. That's hot.

"Talk to Fluttershy then! And just let me be me!"

>There's the point. She's not being her.

>Pinkie's desparing rage subsides.

>Almost dying at a party. Almost getting arrested at a party. Almost getting date-raped at a party.

>And she wants to lose herself to that?

>She wants to relinquish any form of sanity and divulge in the worst things that could possibly happen to you, in your already relatively meaningless existence on this earth?

>YOLO? Nolo.

"G-get out."

>What?

"Get out... right now."

>She sounds serious.

>And you've seen serious Pinkie.

>Borderline murderous.

 

A. comfort her

B. leave.

C. Spit in her direction then leave.

 

>No. You're staying right here.

"Fine... you leave me no choice."

>She reaches under the bed... and pulls out a gun.

>Oh shit...

"This? Oh... it's nothing."

>She points it at you. Your spine tingles.

“You’re going to get out… right now. Leave me alone forever. No more questions asked.”

>N-no! Pinkie needs help... and... you really want to help her.

>The tears on her face come again.

"NO! I don't need help! I don't need anybody!"

>Her eyes grow psychotically wide, as she changes the aim of the gun, from your stomach to your head.

"I only need myself! Not you! Not even this old Pinkie!"

>She points the gun to her head.

>Pinkie... don't.

>You step towards her, the point of the gun changing from her temple to your head.

>You're staring down the barrel of a hot metal .45.,,

"Take one more step, and you can have the first bullet."

>You put your hands up and stand still.

>She slowly points the gun back toward her temple.

>NOW!

>You reach for the gun.

>But you're too slow.

>Your last moments are spent. The slowest moments of your life.

>You see her take aim...

>Facial expression changing from desperation to sheer happiness.

>The muscles in her forearm twitch as her finger squeezes to pull the trigger.

>The gun recoils and the slide blows back.

 

>Fuck, that smarts.

"Gotcha Nonny! It was an airsoft gun!"

>Pinkie's laughing hysterically as she drops the gun.

>You sigh and pick it up, taking out the magazine, inspecting the plastic BB that just hit your forehead.

>You rub your forehead to make the pain go away.

>Mommy, kiss the booboo.

"You're a real gullible sucker, aren't you Nonny?"

>Is she crazy? You almost pissed your pants!

"I know... but it was funny though."

>This dense bitch. You put your life on the line to make sure that she was okay and not being a slutty party whore.

"And... Anon?"

>WHAT, YOU MISERABLE CUNT.

"Thanks."

>Pinkie wraps you up in one of her signature hugs.

>Can't be mad now.

"You... passed the test I guess. You really do care about me, don't you!"

>Pinkie smiles and kisses your cheek.

>You're dumbfounded at this point.

"And guess what the best part is?"

>You can't answer.

"I never pledged to Chi Up! I just took all of their free stuff! That partyscene is scary!"

>You sigh and leave, smirking and shaking your head in comic disbelief.

>Fucking Pinkie.

 

End Day "Nonny wait! It was just a joke! I love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!" 37

 

Day 37 "Nonny? Are you still here? Come on! I was joking!" Summary

Pinkie Arc completed

Rainbow Arc advanced.

Gains and brains.

 

>You walk through the girls hall, as you hear Pinkie calling out to you.

>Nope, you're giving that girl the silent treatment for a little while.

>Can't believe she would've killed you.

>You rub your forehead. Shit still hurts.

>You pass by a girl in white sweatpants... purple hair a mess.

>No make up on.

>Who is she? And why is she so... eugh.

>Pinkie's new roommate maybe?

>Nah.

>She doesn't say a word, just passes on through.

>You do the same.

 

>Enter room. Spike's still Leaguing.

>You sigh and open up your computer to check your regulars.

>Steam Train multiplayer? Barry talks? Suzy's in this now?

>Emails have more study guides for your midterm.

>OH FUCK, MIDTERMS!

>You check your Facebook and send one message before spending the night, studying.

Femanon (see you Friday): You too. :)