Title:           First Story: Part Two
Author:          NapalmOctopus
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/rnDjUPDt
First Edit:      Wednesday 2nd of October 2013 10:11:39 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Wednesday 2nd of October 2013 10:11:39 PM CDT

"Yes, Anon?"
"Who the fuck do you think you are, coming into my apartment and giving me shit in here?! Get the fuck out!"
"I beg your pardon, Anon. But as I am forced into Celestia-knows-where your hovel is, I would appreciate you acting like a responsible host and provide some hospitality for your guest!"
>She turns away from me and trots off like some snotty bitch.
>I've had enough.
"You know what, fine! Let me take this fine opportunity to be a better host to my GUEST and show you where you'll be staying right fucking now!"
>Into the fucking broom closet you go, bitch!
"Oh! How dare you! Let me out this instant! I-" *SHRIEK!* "It's even filthier in here! Oh, there's dust collecting on my mane and there's-"
>Fuck, I forgot how nasty it is in there. Maybe it's because I rarely use whatever's in there. There's probably going be some fuckin' mold or something growing in there.
 "Eeeek! Oh, there's mold on my hoof! Ohhh, somepony help!"
>Huh, mystery solved.
>Alright, while she's in there. I should think over how I'm going to handle this fucking mess.
>I doubt kicking her out will end well. I really don't give a fuck if she gets the shit stomped out of her but since she's some freaky pony, unicorn...thing! All it would do is just create unwanted attention and I have a feeling that it would come back and tear a chunk out of my ass. I REALLY have to be careful with how this handled.
"I have had just about enough of this! I demand you let me out this instant or I shall be provoked into using force!"
>I really should let her out. The noise she's making will just piss off the neighbours and...well, it's fucking nasty in there.
"Okay, you have enough y-"
"HYA!"
*CLANG!*
"Ow! Son of a bitch!"
>Did she just throw bucket at me? How the hell did she do that?
"You're absolutely vile! How dare you force a lady into such a horrendous ordeal you created at your own negligence!"
"Don't you think that's the whole point of what I was trying to do?"
"Hmph! I have had enough of this! You, are beyond the worst pain I have ever met in my life and I am leaving!"
"Wait! You can't go outside!"
"Oh really now, Anon. This has gotten old far too quickly and I will not stand for this barbarity!"
"I'm not fucking around Rarity! You go outside, you're just going to attract unwanted attention and get yourself fucked up in the process!"
"Oh? And just what do you propose I do, reside in this pigsty?"
"Well, yeah."
"...You must be joking."
"Honestly, I really wish I was."
"Oh how could such a fate fall upon a pony such as moi? Exiled into some horrifying dimension where I am being held captive by some vicious brute who mercilessly torments me to no end! This is the worst possible thing there is!" *sob sob*
*Scrape!*      
>Holy shit! The couch just moved!
"Agh! This couch is absolutely horrendous! Just how far does the negligence of your surroundings reach, you beast?!"
"I don't give a shit about the fucking couch! How the hell did you move the goddamn thing?"
"What, haven't you seen magic before?"
"No. I mean, shit like this isn't something you'd see every day. Maybe in a cartoon or some shit..."
>I'm fucking shocked right now. I can't believe something like this actually exists. Does that mean...
"Hey, so the bucket that hit me in the face was-"
"Well deserved?"
"Thrown with magic?"
"Yes indeed."
>Holy fuck, this is too much. I need to step outside right now.
>I should probably make some of my drop-offs while I'm at it too.
"I'm stepping outside."
"Wh-Hey! What am I supposed to do in here by myself?"
"I dunno, you said you were going to try and make the place a little more comfortable to live in, right? That sounds like a fine fuckin' place to start."
"Ah-Hey! Get back here!"
*Slam!*
"Hmph! Ohhh, that-! If he really wants me to clean the place while he's out, I'll make sure to do such a thorough job that it will be completely beyond his recognition when he returns!"