Title:           Mom's Got A Date!
Author:          Mr-Socko
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/KMGNb7hx
First Edit:      Saturday 20th of December 2014 11:42:55 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Last edit on: Monday 22nd of December 2014 10:28:22 PM CDT

Synopsis:
Group Mom Fat E.T. is asked out on a date, problem is, he's a bit rusty. Sammy decides to help him out.
 
Fat E.T.
>Art class, a relaxing environment where there isn't much pressure on students.
>You like to chill out in the back, maybe smoke a little if the teacher isn't paying attention.
>It's the only class you don't share with anybody you live with, the rambunctious bunch.
>They're a great bunch though, just they tend to get a bit out of hand.
>"Hey, you're name is E.T. right?"
>A girl has approached you, not just any girl, Octavia!
"Yup, that's me."
>You've been into her for awhile and would've asked her out if not for all the guys saying she wasn't available.
>"Well, I'll just come out and say it. I would like to go on a date with you."
>If only you were drinking something at the time, the spit take would flood villages in Australia.
"Yeah, sure."
 
Sammy
>Socko and Wampum found something quite odd in the bargain bin today.
>A co-op dating sim, both players work together to romance twin girls and learn their differences.
>It's.... interesting to say the least.
>Though you fear it'll revive Socko's old addiction to dating sims.
>"Don't worry about it" he says, but you can see the glint in his eyes.
>As you and the others watch them play due to a lack of better things to do, E.T. taps you on the shoulder and signals for you to follow him into the hallway.
>"Listen Sam, I need your help, I have a date with Octavia tomorrow."
>E.T. has told you all about Octavia before but this was a surprise.
>You wonder why he's asking you for advice.
>"I'm asking you to help me because the guys can't help me. I want this to be a nice, romantic date. The others would all suggest some crazy shit."
>Each nigga has a unique way of courting girls and E.T. is right, they're all a bit bizarre.
>You assumed E.T. had a way as well, though thinking about E.T. in that situation feels weird, like imagining your mom picking up guys.
>Sometimes you forget he's a teenage boy, a lot of the guys even call him Mom
>Nevertheless, you've always been a fan of the romantic, so you feel confident in helping.
"Well ET, you came to the right place! In less than a day I'll have you acting like a guy in those romantic novels I- uh, I mean that girls read."
>"Great, thanks Sam"
>ET grabs you in a hug, a bear hug!
"We'll start tomorrow morning!"
 
 
>The Next Day, after a couple of hours shopping and styling.
>ET's all cleaned up, he's got the look. Does he have the skill?
"So ET, you need to be able to speak with your sensitive side to win a girl over."
>"What exactly does that entail?"
"Well, simply put, make sure everything you say is from the heart, and show your artistic side as well."
>"Don't listen to her man."
>Oh brother, it would seem that 3rdClass has followed you and ET to the mall.
>3rdClass is a very... emotional person, he's got honor and dignity, but he's also kind of weird.
>"All you gotta do is do what you do man."
"Argh, why are you spying on us?!"
>"I'm not spying, did you forget I work here?"
"Just get back to work then!"
>The Lunatic Fridge shrugs his shoulders and walks back to his workplace at The Booty Butt Burger.
>The only burgers that'll give you that extra umph!
>ET puts his hand over his stomach as it rumbles.
>"How about we order some food from booty butt burger?"
"We have more important stuff to do!"
>Those butt building burgers don't even work.
 
ET
>Later that night, ET is in a suit and still hungry.
>You wait quietly for your date to arrive.
>Eventually Octavia walks into the restaurant and finds her way over to you.
>Like a true gentleman you pull her seat out for her.
>"Thanks ET"
>Such a casual response, but your training causes you to say something quite stupid.
"'Twas not a problem m'lady."
>Now she's looking at you weird.
>You both sit down and give your orders, now it's time for small talk.
>"Remember, be poetic." Those words remain engraved in your mind.
"Octavia, tonight your eyes shine as brightly as the stars of heaven."
>"Thank you ET, you look really nice in a suit."
>That was a miss buddy
"And your voice is as if God himself is creating all things of pleasure."
>"What's with the long winded compliments?"
>Now your confused.
"Just trying to be romantic."
>"ET, do you know why I asked to go out with you?"
>You try to think of a reason but you're honestly stumped.
>The Grey Brit shakes her head and smiles as she grabs your hand.
>"I wanted somebody who was fun to be around and maybe..."
>She looks around cautiously
>"... someone to smoke with."
>In that moment, ET shed the false skin he had donned as he realized something.
>The only reason a girl would ask out a guy is if she liked him, not a character from a book.
 
The End
WEEB TRASH PLAYS OVER SHOTS OF NIGGAS