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Oneshots

By: MiroslawStanislav on Aug 20th, 2012 | syntax: None | size: 33.66 KB | hits: 35 | expires: Never

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>Day potato in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>Surprise! It's Fluttershy
>She's sitting in a chair, brown liquid dripping down from it and onto your porch, drool coming out her mouth
>She smells like she hasn't bathed in weeks, the everliving stench of piss, scat, and god knows what else has hit your nose
J-just... Just no Fluttershy. Brain damage and birth defects are not my fetish
>She falls out of her chair and you close the door
>You lied
>Brain damage and birth defects ARE your fetish.
>Day negrosexuals in Equestria
>There's a knock at the door
>You open revealing Zecora
Well what a surprise hi Zecor-
>She stabs you in the chest with a knife
>You collapse as she runs inside with 20 Zebra children trampling you
>After 10 seconds they all emerge trampling you again
>Zecora has your TV
>Her kids have all your electronics
>One has your watch
>As they all fade into the sunset you hear a squeak
>"Oh hi anon... Is black on white crime your fetish?"
>You stand up, joints groaning in pain, and walk into your house, Fluttershy trailing behind you
>"A-anon"
>You put on your hood and take out your machete
>"A-an-anon!?!?!"
IT'S KLAN TIME
>"NO ANON NO"
>And on that day, many zebras and ponies were sodomized, and chopped into pieces
>Day Equestria in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>IT IS TIME
>You reach behind your dresser and pull out your latest creation
>It's a musket, loaded with a .50 caliber ball, you must thank Zecora for that saltpeter, sulfur, and charcoal some time
>You cock the hammer fully back, load the pan with some more blackpowder, and aim at the door
>Another knock, you pull the trigger
>BOOOOOOOM
>You quickly run to open the door
>It's Fluttershy, dead on the ground
>Wait Fluttershy is yellow, not white
>...and she doesn't have a horn and rainbow hair
>You just shot Celestia
>You are currently residing in the sun
>Day alcohol in Equestria
>You've cracked open a bear and been casually watching TV, casually
>You take a sip
>PDSGSDFHSDHSHS
>You spit out the foul tasting fluid
WHAT IN UNGODLY FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS BEER
>Suddenly Fluttershy emerges from behind the TV
>"So I guess menstruation and fluids aren't your fetish anon?"
>You don't hear the rest of what she was saying because you're too busy sawing off your head with a bread knife.
>Day Miro in Equestria
>Niggers
>NIGGERS
>HEY I SAID NIGGERS
>ARE YOU FUCKING LISTENING TO ME
>NIGGGERERRRSSSSSSS
No Fluttershy, bad writers are not my fetish
>"Aww..."
>Day Pinkie Pie in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>It's Pinkie Pie
>You fucking HATE Pinkie Pie
>"Hey anon I knew how lonely you were here so I was wondering if you wanted to go on a picknick with me and th-"
>You punch her in the face with the force of a thousand suns
>Her head explodes into cocaine and sugar and rains upon Equestria
>Ponies mix it into their food thinking it was sugar
>The next day 90% of the ponies are dead from heart attacks
>Meanwhile in ponyville
>"M-mommy... Please wake up... Please wake up mommy... Please..."
>Day spaghetti in Equestria
>There's a knock at the door
>Surprise, It's... Fluttershy?
>She's at least 100 pounds fatter, standing upright on two legs, dressed in a shirt with the latest pony anime on it, with glasses, acne, cheeto dust covering all of her in a light blanket
>She smells like she hasn't bathed in weeks
>"H-h-hi a-a-an-an-anon"
>She gasps and takes a deep breath, sweating heavily
>"A-are n-n-neckbeards y-your f-fetish"
>You can see the spaghetti falling out of her cargo shorts
No Fluttershy neckbeards are not my fetish
>"O-ok"
>You shut the door and hear a deafening crack
>You rush to your window and look outside
>Fluttershy has taken off on a rocket of shit and spaghetti
>
>You kill yourself later that night
>Day children in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>Surprise, It's Fluttershy... And scootaloo who's shaking
>Jesus fuck what happened to scootaloo
Uhh... Fluttershy?
>As if on que she starts beating Scootaloo with her hooves, endless backhoove after backhoove, she's really going to town on her
Fluttershy
>"You stupid fucking piece of shit this is what you get for being adopte-"
FLUTTERSHY
>"Yes anon?"
Scootabuse isn't my fetish
>"Aww..."
Come inside scootaloo, Fluttershy, go fuck yourself with a rake
>Once you close the door you pounce on scootaloo
>Tender loving happened
>Good end
>Day Anime in Equestria
>You're masturbating with cheeto dust on your three inch penis
>There's a knock on the door
>You answer without any clothing, your 300 pound gut swaying in the breeze, and the stench of unwashed body flowing through the air
>Surprise, It's Fluttershy
Fluttershy *deep breath* I told you to stop trying, you're not good enough for me
>"Anon Ponyville is evicting you because the smell of your body is sending people into comas"
>You slam the door
>Stupid Fluttershy, thinking she owns you
>Suddenly your house crumples all around you, and you see the mane 6 surrounding you
Aww yeah *Pant* It's orgy time
>Twilight vaporizes you with her horn
>Bad end
>Day tenders in Equestria
>You're masturbating to your favorite video, Big willies in small fillies 4, the return of the mac
>Suddenly, you see nothing but yellow
>"YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY ANON, YOU THINK IT'S OK"
>Your vision clears and you see Fluttershy in high heels, standing over you and your genitals protruding from a wooden board
>"THIS IS WHAT YOU GET"
>She stomps down on your penis with the stiletto, puncturing through it, shooting out blood onto the table
>You see nothing but red
fluttershy...
>"Yes?"
YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE GENITAL TORTURE IS NOT MY FETISH
>She squeaks and tries to run away but you grab her leg and rip it out of her body
>You beat her to death with her own leg before you die of blood loss
>Bad end
>Day rapist in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>It's Twilight Spankle
>"O-oh hey anon I was wondering if I could study you for... Purposes, all I need for you to do is take off your pants"
>You take off your pants, revealing your noodly appendage
>"What the fuck anon, I came here to study the muscle framework of your legs not your breakfast sausage of a dick, put some underwear on for fucks sake you're embarrassing yourself"
>
>
>Today was a bad day
>Day 412 in Equestria
>There's a knock at the door
>Surprise, It's OH SHIT WHAT THE FUCK
>You jump out of the way as a Trex wearing a yamaka devours the entrance to your home
>"Oh high anon are JewnocerousRexes your fetish?"
I just... WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET THAT THING?
>Day 666 in Equestria
>You've woken up to morning wood, and so far It's lasted til 1200 and It's still hard
>You've tried fapping, you've tried reasoning with him, but every time you got the same answer
>Gottatapdatflankgottatapdatflankgottatapdatflank
>You went off to work, late, at Sweet apple acres again
>While bringing the baskets into the barn Applebloom keeps pestering you about random bullshit
Hey applebloom?
>"Yeah?"
>You take off your pants revealing your fully erect cock
>Applebloom looks at you for five seconds and then bursts out laughing
Why are you laughing? I'm going to rape you for fucks sake!
>"Ah'm sorry anonymous, but even snails has a bigger willy than y'do now!"
>Spaghetti starts dripping out of your pockets
>Big mac opens the barn door
>He bursts out laughing and then forces you to the ground
>He rapes you with his 30 inch penis and you die of blood loss
>Bad end
>Day 568 in Equestria
>Rainbow Dyke has challenged you to a fight
>You must defend your honor, so you accept
>The day of the fight arrives
>You're in the ring with Rainbow Dyke
>She rushes after you throwing a punch
>She's fast, she hits you
>Feels like you got hit with a pillow
>You laugh and throw a light punch at her
>You hit her head and hear an audible crack
>She collapses, blood pooling around her
Uhh... Shit
>You are arrested and tried for murder
>Verdict came out guilty
>As the ponies try to restrain you and take you to prison you starts throwing punches, breaking the skulls of the police around you
>Ponies try to use magic to stop you, but your resistance keeps it off of you
>You escape to The Griffon Kingdom and live happily ever after
>Good end
>Day potato in Equestria
>You're sitting at home fapping to playpony
>And nothing interesting happens
>
>Be in Equestria
>OH MY GOD I'VE WAITED MY ENTIRE LIFE TO BECOME FRIENDS WITH THE MANE 6 AND HAVE AN ORGY
>You strip down naked and walk into town
>Everyone simultaneously bursts into laughter at the sight of your dick
S-shut up
>You run up to the nearest pony and start trying to fuck her
>She bucks you in the balls and you squirt blood all over her
>While you're gasping in pain the mane 6 show up
>Twilight uses her magic and rips you in half
>Bad end
>Arrive in Equestria
>Walk into ponyville
>Immediately the stench of dried piss and moldy sweat assaults your senses
>In the middle of town a big heap of sweaty neckbeards are arguing
>"BETTY SPERGHETTI!"
>"ATHER!"
>"RAINBOW TRUCKER!"
>"ILAMINATI"
>"MURRO STOP SAMEFAGGIN"
>"SUK MY DIK NIGR"
>"PLZ GO"
>"AGERHERRI"
>"SAUSUGE!"
>">rape"
>"MUDDER FACKERS READ MY NEW STORY IT'S CALLED ANON x PUMPKIN PIE"
>Do a 360
>Run out of ponyville
>Arrive in Equestria
>It's night time
>Go to Fluttershy's cottage
PAY ATTENTION TO ME
>You're wailing and screaming and pounding on the door
>"*Yawn* oh hi anonymous I didn't expect to see you so early"
Fluttershy nobody is paying attention to me
>"Is being an attention whore your fetish"
>Suddenly, you realize your old life
>You're actually [spoiler]Miro[/spoiler] an attention whore on /mlp/ and /r9k/
>Bad end
>Arrive in Equestria
>
>And nothing interesting happened
>Arrive in Equestria
>Mane 6 try to stop you
>Rainbow dash crashes into you and her hollow bones fragment and puncture her lungs
>Twilight tries to lift you with magic but overloads due to slight magic resistant and her horn explodes sending fragments of horn into Fluttershy and Rarity
>Pinkie Pie tries to fight you but gets a heart attack from a mixture of cocaine, caffeine, and sugar
>Applejack tries to buck you but when her hoof makes contact it shatters and you throw her because [spoiler]Ponies are really light[/spoiler]
>You sit there WTFing
>Discord is released
>Gives you god powers
>You overthrow Celestia
>Good times
>Be chillin in Ponyville park
>Suddenly you hear screeching
>You look to the tracks, a giant spool of thread on wheels has flown off the rails and into a rose shop
>There were no survivors
>
>Today was a drama day
>Arrive in Equestria
>Twilight wants to perform experiments on you and cut you open
>Backhand her and steal Spike
>Make a mold with his dick, and make a line of dragon dildos
>You make millions
>Arrive in Equestria
>Ponies capture you and force you into testing
>You die on the operating table as they're removing your organs
>Arrive in Equestria
>Some mint green pony is following you around town
>She's staring at you like a maniac
>As you're looking behind you, you lose sight, and then bump into something
>It's the pony
>"LEMME SEE YOUR HANDS!"
>Freaking out, you punch her in the jaw with an audible crunch
>You sprint away and lock yourself in the cellar
>I don't know where I'm going with this
>So in the end everyone dies
>Everyone dies
>Bad end
>Hanging out with Rainbow dash
>"Am I your bro, bro?"
No you aren't my bro
>She hangs herself the next day
>Good end
>Be in Equestria
>Stuff happens
>Epic adventure
>Love with (favorite pony)
>Die in tragic accident
>Feels
>Arrive in Equestria
>Ponies all over your dick
>Find love with (favorite pony)
>Marry
>Have children
>Wake up
>Realize nobody would want your 600 pound cheeto-dust and crusty-sperm armored body
>Burst into treats
>Day Pinkie Pie in Equestria
>You're out for a picnic in Ponyville Park
>As the ponies are pulling out their dandelion sandwiches, you began pulling out your lunch
>A club of salami, a few slices of cheese, lettuce, and bacon
>You prepare you sandwich, and then look up
>The mane 6 are staring at you like you just gave hot dickings to your 8 year old cousin
What?
>"Y-you're eating meat... How can you do this?"
Because I can?
>I don't know where to continue with this
>So here have this
>:3
>Meet the mane 6
>I have no idea where I'm going with this
>So everyone has an orgy
>They have an orgy
>Good end
>Day dickings in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>Surprise, It's Fluttershy covered head to hoof in blood
>She's snacking on something
>Wait is that...
WHY ARE YOU EATING SCOOTALOO
>"Because I already ate my chickens"
>You slam the door shut
>An hero with spoon
>Day music in Equestria
>You're rockin out with your band, "The Niggers" in your garage
>Suddenly some blue haired pony rolls up blasting dubstep
BITCH GET LOST
>"WHO YOU CALLIN A BITCH, BITCH?"
>You walk over and pick up the pony
>Then you stick your dick in her side because ponies are [spoiler]marshmellow[/spoiler]
>Day 1938 in Equestria
>You've rounded up all the Earth ponies and forced them to work in the food business
>.....
>Not much has changed
>Day 123 in Equestria
>You've been making, "Special" fireworks for the fourth, Equestria's founding date
>They're really just pipebombs
>You come home to find Fluttershy sitting outside your door, with a pipebomb in her vaginnis
>"Oh hey anon... Are fireworks your Fetish?"
>She lights the fuse, you back away
Fluttershy... THROW THAT AWAY
>"Why, is it not your feti-"
>BOOOOOOOOOOOOM
>All you see after the smoke clears is a gaping hole of flesh and blood inside of Fluttershy
>You run to her aid while she's shaking and in death throws
>She dies in your arms
>Little did she know, mutilated sexual organs are your fetish
>Day susizzle in Equestria
>You're sick of this world, It's time to commit sudoko and sucizzle out of this place
>First you try downing three bottles full of pills
>It turns out they were all laxatives
>You spent the next two weeks shitting nonstop
>The next time you tried to hang yourself
>The rope snapped and you came in your pants
>Then you tried to /wrist
>Turns out the knife was ground down on one side so it wasn't sharp
>So you tried to jump off a bridge, only to be saved by a familiar yellow shape
>"So anon are failed sucizzle attempts your fetish?"
>While she was asking you jumped off the bridge again
>You die
>Good end
>Day ponyville in Equestria
>You've been going around town, getting your regular fix of marshmellow pony booty
>So far you've only targeted the white mares, while Rarity wasn't looking you took a big lick out of her flank
>Tastes like rocks
>Then you licked Sweetie Belle's flank
>Tastes like Marshmellow
>But you hunger for more
>You see your prey
>Scootaloo, minding her own business
>You walk up behind her, and take a swipe for her flank
>You succeed, tastes like chicken
>Day to day you manage to taste everyp-ny in ponyville, each with their own taste
>Every time you walk into town ponies run away at full speed
>Except you manage to catch the fillies
>Eventually your unsatiable hunger takes you up to canterlot
>You lick Luna's cutie mark, tastes like cheese, and then lick Celestias, which tasted like flamin hot cheetos'
>"Oh anonymous... I never knew"
>She takes you to her chambers and sticks her dick in you
>Bad end
>Day Miro in Equestria
>You're attention whoring it up with all the ponies
>Suddenly Mecha-Clestia comes out with her giant robot
>It's made of dildos and dildo accessories
ACTIVATE SPAGHETTI AUTIST POWERS
>You shoot your wad of spaghetti out of your dick, impaling Celestia's robot and sending her to the ground
>All the mares swoon and their mare juices flow
>You drown in a sticky, warm goo.
COME ONE COME ALL TO MY AMAZING SODA DRINK SHOP!
>The ponies begin to gather around your stand
WE'VE GOT ORANGE, GRAPE, BERRY, APPLE, ALL KINDS OF DELICIOUS SODA DRINKS, OR, TRY ONE OF OUR NEW DRINKS, THE ENERGY SPASTASTIC!
>A small colt walks up to the bar
>"Ooh, ooh! Give me the Energy Spastastic!"
For you, no charge
>You slide him the glass fizzy drink
>He drinks it, and then shouts
>"HOT DICKS! THIS SHIT IS GOOD, COME GET SOME"
>Suddenly all the ponies rush and get the Energy spastastic
>After everyone gets their drinks, the original colt's chest opens and his innards spew out onto the ground
>Instantly half of ponyville's guts are on the ground
>You're already out of town on the Flim Flam brother's cart by then
>Good end
>Day Nigger in Equestria
>Knock on the door
>Surprise! It's Fluttershy
>"Oh hi anon, are Judobear Romans your Fetish?"
I uhh... Whu-
>Suddenly a bear attacks you, using his judo skills and gladius to dismember you
>Fluttershy tries to stop him, but she too gets a taste of the gladius
>The judo bear roman goes on a rampage and kills half of ponyville
>Good end
>Busy working in your dentistry shop
>You've got a wood drill, a hammer, a chisel, and a bunch of caulk and teeth molds
>You've been working as ponyville's dentist, who knew eating so much sugar and candy would rot your teeth eh?
>Pinkie Pie bounces in again
Pinkie Pie... This is the 7th time this week, are you sure you have cavities
>"Mmhmm"
Fine, sit down on this table
>She complies and you get out your hand drill and hammer
>You smack her across the head, she's out cold
>Then you put the hand drill in her mouth and start drilling wildly into every black speck you see
>Once you are done drilling you fill the holes up with Caulk, and she awakes
>"Wow gee thanks Anon, what do I owe you"
Eh, this time I'll let it slide.
>She leaves and goes to eat more candy
>Hanging out with the CMC
>"Anon what could our cutie marks be?"
Ever heard of committing genocide?
>"Genowhat?"
Now listen, you gotta overthrow Celestia and Luna, take their powers, and then extinguish the life of all of one type of pony in Equestria, let's say Earth
>"But whai does it gotta be Earth Anonymous?"
Shhh, go do it
>Within 3 days Canterlot is in ruins and half a million Earth ponies have been murdered
>Day prank in Equestria
>You've pulled a little prank on Pinkie Pie
>You've mixed acetone peroxide into her, "Non-bake" cupcake recipe
>Soon you see hundreds of ponies eating her cupcakes throughout the day
>Without a single incident occuring, you step outside
>Outside the door is 500 ponies with brains splattered across the walls and jaws missing
>Oops
>Day Primo Victoria in Equestria
>Celestia has challenged you to a cock duel
>You'd think she was going to use her horn, but not in... THAT, way
>She cast a transformation spell that made her have a 300 foot long penis
>You got sucked into her erection
>Bad end
>Day aiming in heaven while serving in hell
>Applerape keeps on trying to eat you
>She does
>Little does she know vore is your fetish
>You sperm inside of her
>Somehow she gets pregnant and gives birth to you
>wat
>Ding dong
Oh who the fuck could that be
>"SURPRISE! It's the mailmare! I got you a let-"
>Smack, you crack her across the head with a hickory stick
>Drag her into your basement, her head hitting every step
Should I put a pillow under her? Or is sh, well she has no brain there's no issue.
>She begins waking up
>"Anonymooose why'd you hit me in the muffin"
Shut the fuck up
>Open her legs
>"Anonymooose you aren't my husband get away from there"
>Stick it in the pony
>It feels like sticking it into a crumpet
>Start moving back and forth
>Every time you move you hear her say, "Muffin"
>"Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin"
>Hngnngngg and came
>"Oh boy Mr anon that was a fun game! We should play again later"
Yeah sure
>Take mail
>Let her out
>Sit down on the couch and cry
>Arrive in Equestria
>You're in the middle of p0nyville
>And everyp0ny is looking
>RIGHT
>AT
>YOU
>You attempt to sprint but a rainbow blur knocks you off your feet
>You try to scream but you feel a large mass enter your mouth
>It's a horse penis
>A pony with caramel color is skull fucking you with his 1 foot cock
>Oh god no
>You clothes are ripped off by an unknown force
>You can hardly see a large red stallion begin to mount you
>His 1.5 foot cock penetrates deep into your insides, moving back and forth
>"Eeeeeyup!"
>You sit there barely managing to breath between thrusts, as everyone watches you get fucked.
>Finally the caramel one cums, filling your throat with 1 liter of sperm, and he dismounts your face
>You try to scream but you choke on his sperm, still warm in your throat
>You feel a twitch in your anus
>Big mac cums filling you up with 2 liters of hot sticky horse fluid
>You lay there bleeding to death, choking on sperm.
>Finally you fade away from consciousness.
>Day vaginitis in Equestria
>You wake up in a squishy, warm, wet bed
>Peering below... It's... Pink?
>"OH HI ANON ARE GIANTESSES YOUR FETISH?'
>She flinches at Fetish and crushes you to death in her mare parts.
>Day beverages in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>It appears to be a small yellow object
>"Oh hi anon is disestablishmentarianism your fetish?"
I don't understand... Are you some sort of beverage?
>"What are you tal-"
Because I can't have alcohol, doctor's orders
>"A-ano-"
Wait... Beverages don't talk... I think I need time to think this out
>You close the door
How could beverages talk... I just... I am so confuse.
>Day 345
>Drinking a cold beverage in your house
>Suddenly you hear shouting coming from your cool delicious beverage
>You put your ear to it
>"Anon! Is vore and minaturism your fetish?"
Why is my beverage talking
>You throw your nasty talking beverage against the wall
>You crack open a cold delicious beverage and continue staring at the TV
>Day equestria in Equestria
>You're sitting at an intervention
>"Anon you need to put down the beverages, they're ruining your life!"
>You pull out a can of cool refreshing beverage and crack it open
>You start drinking while they all watch angrily
>As you finish, you look down to the bright colors in front of you
Are you a beverage
>"No we're your friends!"
Beverages don't talk... So you're not a beverage
>You 360 out of there
>As you're walking away from the clinic you crack open another refreshing beverage
>Day 9/11 in Equestria
>You're enjoying the cool breeze when you hear jet engines
>You look up just to see a squad of brown ponies crash into canterlot full speed
>A second after they crash, they detonate inside of the buildings, sending smoke spewing in the air
>Ponies are running out screaming on fire, ponies are falling to their deaths to flee the fire within the buildings
>You just sit there in wonder
I just don't know what went wrong
>As the building collapses 3,000 ponies die
>Canterlot lay in ruins, thousands of fillies have lost their parents this day.
>You crack open a delicious cold refreshing beverage and continue on your way
>That was definitely not a beverage, beverages don't explode into flames.
>Day seament in Equestria
>You're fapping to playpony in your yard
>Suddenly you begin cumming, and cumming
>It's a fucking fire hose
>You run into town and manage to spray half the town's population in the face with sperm
>Fucking parades
>You finally make it to Twilight's house
HELP TWILIGHT I CAN'T STOP CUMMING
>She busts down the door levitating dragon dildos and a butt plug
>You douse her in your sticky man goo
>You run back home and close the door
>You turn on the TV
http://youtu.be/LZepj6u5Dtc
>Why can't you stop cumming
NOT MY TV!
>"Oh hi anon are unrealistic amounts of cum volume your fetish?"
>You spray her in the face until she drowns
>She still manages to climax
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Be at your postal office going totally postal
>You're shooting that cunt Jenny in her stupid fucking face
>SHOULDN'T HAVE EATEN MY PIZZA ROLLS OUT OF THE FRIDGE YOU FAT CUNT
>Suddenly, the ground gives out beneath you
>You wake up in a colorful technicolor land
>Suddenly a Pink Pony rushes up to you blabbering on
>GOIN POSTAL
>RELOADIN
>DOSH
>You open fire in her stupid fucking face sending her to the gound
>Suddenly ponies everywhere
GOIN HOT
>You unsling your ruger 10/22 with bumpfire stock and open fire into the crowd
HOLD ON, I'M RELOADING
>Suddenly some fat white bitch covered in cake frosting comes down
>"Hey you you I don't like your girlfriend"
Wat
>You shoot her in the ribs and run up to her, sticking your dick in her chest
>You cum, and she cums, the whole world cums
>You drown in sticky mare juices
>Bad end
>Be sitting around, chilling, you're very chilly, but you like that
>Suddenly Rainbow Dash flies down to you all hot and steamy
>She starts massaging your tip, trying to get the good stuff inside
>She pulls your tab just right
>You open, spilling your delicious juices all over her
>She starts drinking it like It's water
>You are a beverage
>Arrive in Equestria
>You begin devouring all the oats
MUH GAINZ, I CAN FEEL THEM
>You begin squatting ponies
DO YOU EVEN LIFT YOU SKINNYFAT FAGGOT
>You squat the princess
AHAHAHAAHA FAGGOTS
>Then you drown in mare juices
>Bad end
>Day pickles in Equestria
>You're knocking on the door of the library to return a book.
>You press your eat to the door, hearing horrible shrieking sounds
Hold on imma coming Twilight!
>You kick open the door
>There, Twilight Sparkle is masturbating with a gigantic cucumber while moaning your name
>She notices you
>I don't know where I'm going with this
>So here, have this
>:3
>Day 35324643634 in Equestria
>Drinking a delicious beverage
>Suddenly you feel a pony ass on your head and a nasty liquid shoots into you beverage
>In frustration you shove the entire can up the pony's vagina and [spoiler]Start rimjobbing its anus[/spoiler]
>She squash soups in your mouth
>You punch her in the dick and she dies
>Good end
>Day Equestria in Equestria
>You're fucking Celestia
>Suddenly her maregina tenses up
>She cums
>Suddenly you hear voices, voices everywhere
>It's all the sound of people cumming
>Later you're at Twilight's while she's researching why everyone came at once
>"It says here if the Princess cums, everyp-ny in Equestria cums... but everyone came when you were visiting the prince-"
>"You didn't"
>Suddenly she rips all the clothing off of you and starts sucking your dick
>"Must, get, princess, marejuices, in, body"
>Good end
>Day brown people in Equestria
>You see Zecora in ponyville market
>YOU HATE BROWN PEOPLE PONY OR NOT
>You go up to her and tap her on the maregina
>She turns around and you attack her with a machete
>"THIS IS JUST LIKE BACK HOME!"
>She orgasms instantly, and then starts popping out Zebra children
>What is that 16?
>Suddenly she gets an afro, food stamps, and welfare out of nowhere
>"Mmmhmm big momma's gonna eat good tonight!"
>She disappears
>Her children steal your wallet
>Fucking Zecora
>Day Equestria in Equestria
>You got dns" Analpie for your captcha
>Suddenly Pinkie bursts down your door
>She has a 36 inch strapon
>She beats you across the face, somehow manages to handcuff you with streamers, and then begins raping you
>You die of blood loss
>Bad end
>Day racism in Equestria
>You're walking down the street when suddenly a Zecora youth emerges from the alleyway
>"Hey ma-"
TAKE MY WALLET
>"No I'm not for tha-"
TAKE IT AND DON'T HURT ME PLEASE
>You throw your wallet to him
>"I don't want to hurt yo-"
FINE YOU CAN HAVE MY SHOES AS WELL
>You throw your shoes "Sir take these back"
N-no, you can't have that
>"Sir please, I'm trying to enjoy tonig-"
F-f-fine
>You pull down your pants and bend over
P-please be gentle
>"Fine, you know what, fuck you"
>He walks away
>Later on the ponynet
>"OH MY GOD I GOT JUMPED BY A FUCKING ZEBRA WE SHOULD KILL THEM ALL, I BEAT HIS ASS SO GOOD"
>Meanwhile you're using a horse dildo
>Weird end
>Day horrifying atrocities in Equestria
>You're eating out Fluttershy for some reason
I LIKE TO PUNCH DA PUSSY
>Suddenly you feel something stick to your tongue
>It's cheese, and not the good kind
>You vomit into her maregina which she sprays onto your face
>"So I guess unwashed filthy whores aren't your Fetish?"
>You shoot yourself in the dick, then shoot yourself in the mouth, then shoot yourself in the temple
>Atrocity end
>Day ponies in Equestria
>Ponies keep on trying to rape you
>Finally you start to take no shit
>Rope comes flying? You yank on it
>Applejack crashes down and you start wailing on her face
>Fluttershy at the door?
>Kick her in the jaw
>Finally they give up
>Good end
>Give creatine to Fluttershy
>In a rage she murders and devours all her animals
>Zyzz would be proud
>Good end
>Day Filthy Frank in Equestria
I LIKE TO PUNCH DA PUSSY
>You go around punching mareginas and kittens out of trees
>Half of the time you got stuck in them
>I don't know where I'm going with this
>So here have this
>?
>Day sleep in Equestria
>You're sleeping
>"Is sleep your fetish anon"
Yes Fluttershy
>Today was a good day
>Arrive in Equestria
>Rainbow Dash has a pair of broken wings
>There's some Sperg version of Twilight running around screaming BAKA BAKA BAKA
>Rainbow Dash has been replaced with shitstreak version of her
>Fluttershy and Applejack keep on trying to rape you
>360
>Run out of ponyville
>Day total in Equestria
>There's a COCK at the door
>Surprise, It's BITCH shy
>"Oh hi anon, I was wondering if you want to go on a picnic with us?"
Sure Fluttershy lemme grab my COCK and we can go
>"A-anon I don't think that'll be necessary"
No It's ok Fluttershy I just gotta get my FUCKING ANUS out of the fridge and we can go
>"Ok"
>Later at the picnic
Boy am I enjoying this COCK sandwich
>Everyone looks at you like you're an gay
What? Can't a man enjoy a little FUCK SHIT DICK BALLS every once in a COCK
>"You have failed the Illuminati by cursing in this land"
>You are banished to the sun
COCK DICK BALLS SHIT
>Be drug dealer anon
>Be in Equestria
>The CMC show up at your house wanting, "Special Candy"
>You give them crystal meth
>They later whore themselves out to you to get more Meth
>Good end
>Day 70 in Equestria
>Thunder is booming, lightning striking the ground in rapid succession
>You're trying to sleep, rolling over in your bed, trying to get yourself to feel tired enough to fall asleep
>There's a knock on the door
>Opening you reveal a shaking, wet scootaloo
Scootaloo, what happened
>"C-could I c-c-crash a-at y-your p-p-place tonight"
>You turn to the side and let her trot in, closing the door and heading towards the living room
>You grab a few blankets and give them to Scootaloo
You can sleep on the couch if you'd like.
>"T-thanks anon"
>You head back to bed and turn off the light
>Soon you hear steps coming up to your bed, and a certain pony throws herself up next to you
>She snuggles up close to your body, and you lazily drape your arm around her and pull her close
Goodnight Scootaloo
>"Goodnight anon"
>You fall asleep clutching the small pony
>Day heat in Equestria
>Nothing is happening because It's so fucking hot
>Two ponies die of heat stroke
>Bad end
>Be Krusty Krabs
>Arrive in Equestria
>Walk into the market
>MONEY EVERYWHERE
MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY
>You run around grabbing all the gold coins as soon as people drop them
>"Hey! Give those back!" says one angry Cyan horse
>You behead her with your claw
>Good end
>Be sandnigger pony
>You're in the middle of a crowd
ALLAHUAKBAR
>Today was a good day
>Day SandNigger Pony in Equestria
>Fluttershy keeps on trying to guess an infidel's fetish
>You stone her for being a whore
>Good end
Crickets, Caffeine, Cocaine, Creatine, and Codine
>Day niggers in Equestria
>Beverage
>Miro
>Dropped my fucking spaghetti on the carpet
>Fucking fluttershy
>Wingboners
>Fetishes
>I fucking DROPPED my spaghetti on the carpet
>The entire fucking area is red now
>It won't come out
>Hnnnnnnnnnng
>Be slavic anon
>You befriend Fluttershy because she reminds you of your village back home
>Eventually It's time to slaughter the pigs as they have become nice and fat
>You shoot them in between the eyes with a pellet gun and then proceed to hack off their head while they're still alive, seeing as they are paralyzed
>Fluttershy walks out and shrieks and runs up to you screaming bloody murder
Is ok! They feel no pain!
>You then spitroast the pig over an open flame
>Later you have a feast with the griffons
>Slavic end
>Day clapping in Equestria
>You awake to no sun
>The shower yields no cold fresh goodness
>Neither does the tap
>Grabbing your flashlight you walk out the door
>There are no stars
>There's no moon
>All the plants around you are dead
>Entering town you notice nobody is there
>All the windows and doors are open
>"Hello there sonny!"
>You turn and face a... a giant spool of thread?
H-hey.
>"Hold on a sec lemme just give some juice to this world and It'll start right u-"
>Suddenly Fluttershy appears and stabs him in the neck, sending him to the ground
>"Oh hi anon are dead threads your Feti-"
>You beat her to death with your flashlight and attach the spool of thread to the ground, before kicking him and turning the world back on
>Suddenly everything is back to normal
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Day nurse in Equestria
>You're working as a nurse to get some extra bits
>Today you're working on delivering a baby
>The baby got out fine, and as you were cleaning off the table and the mare, it happened
>Nasty sticky fluids sprayed onto you like a torrent of fluids
SOME GOT IN MY MOUTH! OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE ROTTEN CHEESE
>You an hero with a scalpel
>Horrifying atrocity end
>Workin' on eppeljeck farm
>"Anon why don't you fuck me"
I don't fuck horses
>She sprays you with afterbirth
>Bad end
>Day ponygone in Equestria
>Feeling the [spoiler]LOVE[/spoiler]
>The ponies didn't feel the [spoiler]LOVE[/spoiler] as much as you did
>Currently serving a life sentence for rape and molestation

create a new version of this paste RAW Paste Data

>Day potato in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>Surprise! It's Fluttershy
>She's sitting in a chair, brown liquid dripping down from it and onto your porch, drool coming out her mouth
>She smells like she hasn't bathed in weeks, the everliving stench of piss, scat, and god knows what else has hit your nose
J-just... Just no Fluttershy. Brain damage and birth defects are not my fetish
>She falls out of her chair and you close the door
>You lied
>Brain damage and birth defects ARE your fetish.

>Day negrosexuals in Equestria
>There's a knock at the door
>You open revealing Zecora
Well what a surprise hi Zecor-
>She stabs you in the chest with a knife
>You collapse as she runs inside with 20 Zebra children trampling you
>After 10 seconds they all emerge trampling you again
>Zecora has your TV
>Her kids have all your electronics
>One has your watch
>As they all fade into the sunset you hear a squeak
>"Oh hi anon... Is black on white crime your fetish?"
>You stand up, joints groaning in pain, and walk into your house, Fluttershy trailing behind you
>"A-anon"
>You put on your hood and take out your machete
>"A-an-anon!?!?!"
IT'S KLAN TIME
>"NO ANON NO"
>And on that day, many zebras and ponies were sodomized, and chopped into pieces

>Day Equestria in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>IT IS TIME
>You reach behind your dresser and pull out your latest creation
>It's a musket, loaded with a .50 caliber ball, you must thank Zecora for that saltpeter, sulfur, and charcoal some time
>You cock the hammer fully back, load the pan with some more blackpowder, and aim at the door
>Another knock, you pull the trigger
>BOOOOOOOM
>You quickly run to open the door
>It's Fluttershy, dead on the ground
>Wait Fluttershy is yellow, not white
>...and she doesn't have a horn and rainbow hair
>You just shot Celestia
>You are currently residing in the sun

>Day alcohol in Equestria
>You've cracked open a bear and been casually watching TV, casually
>You take a sip
>PDSGSDFHSDHSHS
>You spit out the foul tasting fluid
WHAT IN UNGODLY FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS BEER
>Suddenly Fluttershy emerges from behind the TV
>"So I guess menstruation and fluids aren't your fetish anon?"
>You don't hear the rest of what she was saying because you're too busy sawing off your head with a bread knife.

>Day Miro in Equestria
>Niggers
>NIGGERS
>HEY I SAID NIGGERS
>ARE YOU FUCKING LISTENING TO ME
>NIGGGERERRRSSSSSSS
No Fluttershy, bad writers are not my fetish
>"Aww..."

>Day Pinkie Pie in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>It's Pinkie Pie
>You fucking HATE Pinkie Pie
>"Hey anon I knew how lonely you were here so I was wondering if you wanted to go on a picknick with me and th-"
>You punch her in the face with the force of a thousand suns
>Her head explodes into cocaine and sugar and rains upon Equestria
>Ponies mix it into their food thinking it was sugar
>The next day 90% of the ponies are dead from heart attacks
>Meanwhile in ponyville
>"M-mommy... Please wake up... Please wake up mommy... Please..."

>Day spaghetti in Equestria
>There's a knock at the door
>Surprise, It's... Fluttershy?
>She's at least 100 pounds fatter, standing upright on two legs, dressed in a shirt with the latest pony anime on it, with glasses, acne, cheeto dust covering all of her in a light blanket
>She smells like she hasn't bathed in weeks
>"H-h-hi a-a-an-an-anon"
>She gasps and takes a deep breath, sweating heavily
>"A-are n-n-neckbeards y-your f-fetish"
>You can see the spaghetti falling out of her cargo shorts
No Fluttershy neckbeards are not my fetish
>"O-ok"
>You shut the door and hear a deafening crack
>You rush to your window and look outside
>Fluttershy has taken off on a rocket of shit and spaghetti
>
>You kill yourself later that night

>Day children in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>Surprise, It's Fluttershy... And scootaloo who's shaking
>Jesus fuck what happened to scootaloo
Uhh... Fluttershy?
>As if on que she starts beating Scootaloo with her hooves, endless backhoove after backhoove, she's really going to town on her
Fluttershy
>"You stupid fucking piece of shit this is what you get for being adopte-"
FLUTTERSHY
>"Yes anon?"
Scootabuse isn't my fetish
>"Aww..."
Come inside scootaloo, Fluttershy, go fuck yourself with a rake
>Once you close the door you pounce on scootaloo
>Tender loving happened
>Good end

>Day Anime in Equestria
>You're masturbating with cheeto dust on your three inch penis
>There's a knock on the door
>You answer without any clothing, your 300 pound gut swaying in the breeze, and the stench of unwashed body flowing through the air
>Surprise, It's Fluttershy
Fluttershy *deep breath* I told you to stop trying, you're not good enough for me
>"Anon Ponyville is evicting you because the smell of your body is sending people into comas"
>You slam the door
>Stupid Fluttershy, thinking she owns you
>Suddenly your house crumples all around you, and you see the mane 6 surrounding you
Aww yeah *Pant* It's orgy time
>Twilight vaporizes you with her horn
>Bad end

>Day tenders in Equestria
>You're masturbating to your favorite video, Big willies in small fillies 4, the return of the mac
>Suddenly, you see nothing but yellow
>"YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY ANON, YOU THINK IT'S OK"
>Your vision clears and you see Fluttershy in high heels, standing over you and your genitals protruding from a wooden board
>"THIS IS WHAT YOU GET" 
>She stomps down on your penis with the stiletto, puncturing through it, shooting out blood onto the table
>You see nothing but red
fluttershy...
>"Yes?"
YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE GENITAL TORTURE IS NOT MY FETISH
>She squeaks and tries to run away but you grab her leg and rip it out of her body
>You beat her to death with her own leg before you die of blood loss
>Bad end

>Day rapist in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>It's Twilight Spankle
>"O-oh hey anon I was wondering if I could study you for... Purposes, all I need for you to do is take off your pants"
>You take off your pants, revealing your noodly appendage
>"What the fuck anon, I came here to study the muscle framework of your legs not your breakfast sausage of a dick, put some underwear on for fucks sake you're embarrassing yourself"
>
>
>Today was a bad day

>Day 412 in Equestria
>There's a knock at the door
>Surprise, It's OH SHIT WHAT THE FUCK
>You jump out of the way as a Trex wearing a yamaka devours the entrance to your home
>"Oh high anon are JewnocerousRexes your fetish?"
I just... WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET THAT THING?

>Day 666 in Equestria
>You've woken up to morning wood, and so far It's lasted til 1200 and It's still hard
>You've tried fapping, you've tried reasoning with him, but every time you got the same answer
>Gottatapdatflankgottatapdatflankgottatapdatflank
>You went off to work, late, at Sweet apple acres again
>While bringing the baskets into the barn Applebloom keeps pestering you about random bullshit
Hey applebloom?
>"Yeah?"
>You take off your pants revealing your fully erect cock
>Applebloom looks at you for five seconds and then bursts out laughing
Why are you laughing? I'm going to rape you for fucks sake!
>"Ah'm sorry anonymous, but even snails has a bigger willy than y'do now!"
>Spaghetti starts dripping out of your pockets
>Big mac opens the barn door
>He bursts out laughing and then forces you to the ground
>He rapes you with his 30 inch penis and you die of blood loss
>Bad end

>Day 568 in Equestria
>Rainbow Dyke has challenged you to a fight
>You must defend your honor, so you accept
>The day of the fight arrives
>You're in the ring with Rainbow Dyke
>She rushes after you throwing a punch
>She's fast, she hits you
>Feels like you got hit with a pillow
>You laugh and throw a light punch at her
>You hit her head and hear an audible crack
>She collapses, blood pooling around her
Uhh... Shit
>You are arrested and tried for murder
>Verdict came out guilty
>As the ponies try to restrain you and take you to prison you starts throwing punches, breaking the skulls of the police around you
>Ponies try to use magic to stop you, but your resistance keeps it off of you
>You escape to The Griffon Kingdom and live happily ever after
>Good end


>Day potato in Equestria
>You're sitting at home fapping to playpony
>And nothing interesting happens
>

>Be in Equestria
>OH MY GOD I'VE WAITED MY ENTIRE LIFE TO BECOME FRIENDS WITH THE MANE 6 AND HAVE AN ORGY
>You strip down naked and walk into town
>Everyone simultaneously bursts into laughter at the sight of your dick
S-shut up
>You run up to the nearest pony and start trying to fuck her
>She bucks you in the balls and you squirt blood all over her
>While you're gasping in pain the mane 6 show up
>Twilight uses her magic and rips you in half
>Bad end

>Arrive in Equestria
>Walk into ponyville
>Immediately the stench of dried piss and moldy sweat assaults your senses
>In the middle of town a big heap of sweaty neckbeards are arguing
>"BETTY SPERGHETTI!"
>"ATHER!"
>"RAINBOW TRUCKER!"
>"ILAMINATI"
>"MURRO STOP SAMEFAGGIN"
>"SUK MY DIK NIGR"
>"PLZ GO"
>"AGERHERRI"
>"SAUSUGE!"
>">rape"
>"MUDDER FACKERS READ MY NEW STORY IT'S CALLED ANON x PUMPKIN PIE"
>Do a 360
>Run out of ponyville

>Arrive in Equestria
>It's night time
>Go to Fluttershy's cottage
PAY ATTENTION TO ME
>You're wailing and screaming and pounding on the door
>"*Yawn* oh hi anonymous I didn't expect to see you so early"
Fluttershy nobody is paying attention to me
>"Is being an attention whore your fetish"
>Suddenly, you realize your old life
>You're actually [spoiler]Miro[/spoiler] an attention whore on /mlp/ and /r9k/
>Bad end

>Arrive in Equestria 
>
>And nothing interesting happened

>Arrive in Equestria
>Mane 6 try to stop you
>Rainbow dash crashes into you and her hollow bones fragment and puncture her lungs
>Twilight tries to lift you with magic but overloads due to slight magic resistant and her horn explodes sending fragments of horn into Fluttershy and Rarity
>Pinkie Pie tries to fight you but gets a heart attack from a mixture of cocaine, caffeine, and sugar
>Applejack tries to buck you but when her hoof makes contact it shatters and you throw her because [spoiler]Ponies are really light[/spoiler]
>You sit there WTFing
>Discord is released
>Gives you god powers
>You overthrow Celestia
>Good times

>Be chillin in Ponyville park
>Suddenly you hear screeching
>You look to the tracks, a giant spool of thread on wheels has flown off the rails and into a rose shop
>There were no survivors
>
>Today was a drama day 

>Arrive in Equestria
>Twilight wants to perform experiments on you and cut you open
>Backhand her and steal Spike
>Make a mold with his dick, and make a line of dragon dildos
>You make millions

>Arrive in Equestria
>Ponies capture you and force you into testing
>You die on the operating table as they're removing your organs

>Arrive in Equestria
>Some mint green pony is following you around town
>She's staring at you like a maniac
>As you're looking behind you, you lose sight, and then bump into something
>It's the pony
>"LEMME SEE YOUR HANDS!"
>Freaking out, you punch her in the jaw with an audible crunch
>You sprint away and lock yourself in the cellar
>I don't know where I'm going with this
>So in the end everyone dies
>Everyone dies
>Bad end

>Hanging out with Rainbow dash
>"Am I your bro, bro?"
No you aren't my bro
>She hangs herself the next day
>Good end

>Be in Equestria
>Stuff happens
>Epic adventure
>Love with (favorite pony)
>Die in tragic accident
>Feels

>Arrive in Equestria
>Ponies all over your dick
>Find love with (favorite pony)
>Marry
>Have children
>Wake up
>Realize nobody would want your 600 pound cheeto-dust and crusty-sperm armored body
>Burst into treats

>Day Pinkie Pie in Equestria
>You're out for a picnic in Ponyville Park
>As the ponies are pulling out their dandelion sandwiches, you began pulling out your lunch
>A club of salami, a few slices of cheese, lettuce, and bacon
>You prepare you sandwich, and then look up
>The mane 6 are staring at you like you just gave hot dickings to your 8 year old cousin
What?
>"Y-you're eating meat... How can you do this?"
Because I can?
>I don't know where to continue with this
>So here have this
>:3

>Meet the mane 6
>I have no idea where I'm going with this
>So everyone has an orgy
>They have an orgy
>Good end

>Day dickings in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>Surprise, It's Fluttershy covered head to hoof in blood
>She's snacking on something
>Wait is that...
WHY ARE YOU EATING SCOOTALOO
>"Because I already ate my chickens"
>You slam the door shut
>An hero with spoon

>Day music in Equestria
>You're rockin out with your band, "The Niggers" in your garage
>Suddenly some blue haired pony rolls up blasting dubstep
BITCH GET LOST 
>"WHO YOU CALLIN A BITCH, BITCH?"
>You walk over and pick up the pony
>Then you stick your dick in her side because ponies are [spoiler]marshmellow[/spoiler]

>Day 1938 in Equestria
>You've rounded up all the Earth ponies and forced them to work in the food business
>.....
>Not much has changed


>Day 123 in Equestria
>You've been making, "Special" fireworks for the fourth, Equestria's founding date
>They're really just pipebombs
>You come home to find Fluttershy sitting outside your door, with a pipebomb in her vaginnis
>"Oh hey anon... Are fireworks your Fetish?"
>She lights the fuse, you back away
Fluttershy... THROW THAT AWAY
>"Why, is it not your feti-"
>BOOOOOOOOOOOOM
>All you see after the smoke clears is a gaping hole of flesh and blood inside of Fluttershy
>You run to her aid while she's shaking and in death throws
>She dies in your arms
>Little did she know, mutilated sexual organs are your fetish

>Day susizzle in Equestria
>You're sick of this world, It's time to commit sudoko and sucizzle out of this place
>First you try downing three bottles full of pills
>It turns out they were all laxatives
>You spent the next two weeks shitting nonstop
>The next time you tried to hang yourself
>The rope snapped and you came in your pants
>Then you tried to /wrist
>Turns out the knife was ground down on one side so it wasn't sharp
>So you tried to jump off a bridge, only to be saved by a familiar yellow shape
>"So anon are failed sucizzle attempts your fetish?"
>While she was asking you jumped off the bridge again
>You die
>Good end

>Day ponyville in Equestria
>You've been going around town, getting your regular fix of marshmellow pony booty
>So far you've only targeted the white mares, while Rarity wasn't looking you took a big lick out of her flank
>Tastes like rocks
>Then you licked Sweetie Belle's flank
>Tastes like Marshmellow
>But you hunger for more
>You see your prey 
>Scootaloo, minding her own business
>You walk up behind her, and take a swipe for her flank
>You succeed, tastes like chicken
>Day to day you manage to taste everyp-ny in ponyville, each with their own taste
>Every time you walk into town ponies run away at full speed
>Except you manage to catch the fillies
>Eventually your unsatiable hunger takes you up to canterlot
>You lick Luna's cutie mark, tastes like cheese, and then lick Celestias, which tasted like flamin hot cheetos'
>"Oh anonymous... I never knew"
>She takes you to her chambers and sticks her dick in you
>Bad end

>Day Miro in Equestria
>You're attention whoring it up with all the ponies
>Suddenly Mecha-Clestia comes out with her giant robot
>It's made of dildos and dildo accessories
ACTIVATE SPAGHETTI AUTIST POWERS
>You shoot your wad of spaghetti out of your dick, impaling Celestia's robot and sending her to the ground
>All the mares swoon and their mare juices flow
>You drown in a sticky, warm goo.


COME ONE COME ALL TO MY AMAZING SODA DRINK SHOP!
>The ponies begin to gather around your stand
WE'VE GOT ORANGE, GRAPE, BERRY, APPLE, ALL KINDS OF DELICIOUS SODA DRINKS, OR, TRY ONE OF OUR NEW DRINKS, THE ENERGY SPASTASTIC!
>A small colt walks up to the bar
>"Ooh, ooh! Give me the Energy Spastastic!"
For you, no charge
>You slide him the glass fizzy drink
>He drinks it, and then shouts
>"HOT DICKS! THIS SHIT IS GOOD, COME GET SOME"
>Suddenly all the ponies rush and get the Energy spastastic
>After everyone gets their drinks, the original colt's chest opens and his innards spew out onto the ground
>Instantly half of ponyville's guts are on the ground
>You're already out of town on the Flim Flam brother's cart by then
>Good end

>Day Nigger in Equestria
>Knock on the door
>Surprise! It's Fluttershy
>"Oh hi anon, are Judobear Romans your Fetish?"
I uhh... Whu-
>Suddenly a bear attacks you, using his judo skills and gladius to dismember you
>Fluttershy tries to stop him, but she too gets a taste of the gladius
>The judo bear roman goes on a rampage and kills half of ponyville
>Good end

>Busy working in your dentistry shop
>You've got a wood drill, a hammer, a chisel, and a bunch of caulk and teeth molds
>You've been working as ponyville's dentist, who knew eating so much sugar and candy would rot your teeth eh?
>Pinkie Pie bounces in again
Pinkie Pie... This is the 7th time this week, are you sure you have cavities
>"Mmhmm"
Fine, sit down on this table
>She complies and you get out your hand drill and hammer
>You smack her across the head, she's out cold
>Then you put the hand drill in her mouth and start drilling wildly into every black speck you see
>Once you are done drilling you fill the holes up with Caulk, and she awakes
>"Wow gee thanks Anon, what do I owe you"
Eh, this time I'll let it slide.
>She leaves and goes to eat more candy

>Hanging out with the CMC
>"Anon what could our cutie marks be?"
Ever heard of committing genocide?
>"Genowhat?"
Now listen, you gotta overthrow Celestia and Luna, take their powers, and then extinguish the life of all of one type of pony in Equestria, let's say Earth
>"But whai does it gotta be Earth Anonymous?"
Shhh, go do it
>Within 3 days Canterlot is in ruins and half a million Earth ponies have been murdered

>Day prank in Equestria
>You've pulled a little prank on Pinkie Pie
>You've mixed acetone peroxide into her, "Non-bake" cupcake recipe
>Soon you see hundreds of ponies eating her cupcakes throughout the day
>Without a single incident occuring, you step outside
>Outside the door is 500 ponies with brains splattered across the walls and jaws missing
>Oops

>Day Primo Victoria in Equestria
>Celestia has challenged you to a cock duel
>You'd think she was going to use her horn, but not in... THAT, way
>She cast a transformation spell that made her have a 300 foot long penis
>You got sucked into her erection
>Bad end

>Day aiming in heaven while serving in hell
>Applerape keeps on trying to eat you
>She does
>Little does she know vore is your fetish
>You sperm inside of her
>Somehow she gets pregnant and gives birth to you
>wat

>Ding dong
Oh who the fuck could that be
>"SURPRISE! It's the mailmare! I got you a let-"
>Smack, you crack her across the head with a hickory stick
>Drag her into your basement, her head hitting every step
Should I put a pillow under her? Or is sh, well she has no brain there's no issue.
>She begins waking up
>"Anonymooose why'd you hit me in the muffin"
Shut the fuck up
>Open her legs
>"Anonymooose you aren't my husband get away from there"
>Stick it in the pony
>It feels like sticking it into a crumpet
>Start moving back and forth
>Every time you move you hear her say, "Muffin"
>"Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin Muffin"
>Hngnngngg and came
>"Oh boy Mr anon that was a fun game! We should play again later"
Yeah sure
>Take mail
>Let her out
>Sit down on the couch and cry

>Arrive in Equestria
>You're in the middle of p0nyville 
>And everyp0ny is looking
>RIGHT
>AT
>YOU
>You attempt to sprint but a rainbow blur knocks you off your feet
>You try to scream but you feel a large mass enter your mouth
>It's a horse penis
>A pony with caramel color is skull fucking you with his 1 foot cock
>Oh god no
>You clothes are ripped off by an unknown force
>You can hardly see a large red stallion begin to mount you
>His 1.5 foot cock penetrates deep into your insides, moving back and forth
>"Eeeeeyup!"
>You sit there barely managing to breath between thrusts, as everyone watches you get fucked.
>Finally the caramel one cums, filling your throat with 1 liter of sperm, and he dismounts your face
>You try to scream but you choke on his sperm, still warm in your throat
>You feel a twitch in your anus
>Big mac cums filling you up with 2 liters of hot sticky horse fluid
>You lay there bleeding to death, choking on sperm.
>Finally you fade away from consciousness.

>Day vaginitis in Equestria
>You wake up in a squishy, warm, wet bed
>Peering below... It's... Pink?
>"OH HI ANON ARE GIANTESSES YOUR FETISH?'
>She flinches at Fetish and crushes you to death in her mare parts.

>Day beverages in Equestria
>There's a knock on the door
>It appears to be a small yellow object
>"Oh hi anon is disestablishmentarianism your fetish?"
I don't understand... Are you some sort of beverage?
>"What are you tal-"
Because I can't have alcohol, doctor's orders
>"A-ano-"
Wait... Beverages don't talk... I think I need time to think this out
>You close the door
How could beverages talk... I just... I am so confuse.

>Day 345
>Drinking a cold beverage in your house
>Suddenly you hear shouting coming from your cool delicious beverage
>You put your ear to it
>"Anon! Is vore and minaturism your fetish?"
Why is my beverage talking
>You throw your nasty talking beverage against the wall
>You crack open a cold delicious beverage and continue staring at the TV

>Day equestria in Equestria
>You're sitting at an intervention
>"Anon you need to put down the beverages, they're ruining your life!"
>You pull out a can of cool refreshing beverage and crack it open
>You start drinking while they all watch angrily
>As you finish, you look down to the bright colors in front of you
Are you a beverage
>"No we're your friends!"
Beverages don't talk... So you're not a beverage
>You 360 out of there
>As you're walking away from the clinic you crack open another refreshing beverage

>Day 9/11 in Equestria
>You're enjoying the cool breeze when you hear jet engines
>You look up just to see a squad of brown ponies crash into canterlot full speed
>A second after they crash, they detonate inside of the buildings, sending smoke spewing in the air
>Ponies are running out screaming on fire, ponies are falling to their deaths to flee the fire within the buildings
>You just sit there in wonder
I just don't know what went wrong
>As the building collapses 3,000 ponies die
>Canterlot lay in ruins, thousands of fillies have lost their parents this day.
>You crack open a delicious cold refreshing beverage and continue on your way
>That was definitely not a beverage, beverages don't explode into flames.

>Day seament in Equestria
>You're fapping to playpony in your yard
>Suddenly you begin cumming, and cumming
>It's a fucking fire hose
>You run into town and manage to spray half the town's population in the face with sperm
>Fucking parades
>You finally make it to Twilight's house
HELP TWILIGHT I CAN'T STOP CUMMING
>She busts down the door levitating dragon dildos and a butt plug
>You douse her in your sticky man goo
>You run back home and close the door
>You turn on the TV
http://youtu.be/LZepj6u5Dtc
>Why can't you stop cumming
NOT MY TV!
>"Oh hi anon are unrealistic amounts of cum volume your fetish?"
>You spray her in the face until she drowns
>She still manages to climax
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Be at your postal office going totally postal
>You're shooting that cunt Jenny in her stupid fucking face
>SHOULDN'T HAVE EATEN MY PIZZA ROLLS OUT OF THE FRIDGE YOU FAT CUNT
>Suddenly, the ground gives out beneath you
>You wake up in a colorful technicolor land
>Suddenly a Pink Pony rushes up to you blabbering on
>GOIN POSTAL 
>RELOADIN 
>DOSH
>You open fire in her stupid fucking face sending her to the gound
>Suddenly ponies everywhere
GOIN HOT
>You unsling your ruger 10/22 with bumpfire stock and open fire into the crowd
HOLD ON, I'M RELOADING
>Suddenly some fat white bitch covered in cake frosting comes down
>"Hey you you I don't like your girlfriend"
Wat
>You shoot her in the ribs and run up to her, sticking your dick in her chest
>You cum, and she cums, the whole world cums
>You drown in sticky mare juices 
>Bad end

>Be sitting around, chilling, you're very chilly, but you like that
>Suddenly Rainbow Dash flies down to you all hot and steamy
>She starts massaging your tip, trying to get the good stuff inside
>She pulls your tab just right
>You open, spilling your delicious juices all over her
>She starts drinking it like It's water
>You are a beverage

>Arrive in Equestria
>You begin devouring all the oats
MUH GAINZ, I CAN FEEL THEM
>You begin squatting ponies
DO YOU EVEN LIFT YOU SKINNYFAT FAGGOT
>You squat the princess
AHAHAHAAHA FAGGOTS
>Then you drown in mare juices
>Bad end

>Day pickles in Equestria
>You're knocking on the door of the library to return a book.
>You press your eat to the door, hearing horrible shrieking sounds
Hold on imma coming Twilight!
>You kick open the door
>There, Twilight Sparkle is masturbating with a gigantic cucumber while moaning your name
>She notices you
>I don't know where I'm going with this
>So here, have this
>:3

>Day 35324643634 in Equestria
>Drinking a delicious beverage
>Suddenly you feel a pony ass on your head and a nasty liquid shoots into you beverage
>In frustration you shove the entire can up the pony's vagina and [spoiler]Start rimjobbing its anus[/spoiler]
>She squash soups in your mouth
>You punch her in the dick and she dies
>Good end

>Day Equestria in Equestria
>You're fucking Celestia
>Suddenly her maregina tenses up
>She cums
>Suddenly you hear voices, voices everywhere
>It's all the sound of people cumming
>Later you're at Twilight's while she's researching why everyone came at once
>"It says here if the Princess cums, everyp-ny in Equestria cums... but everyone came when you were visiting the prince-"
>"You didn't"
>Suddenly she rips all the clothing off of you and starts sucking your dick
>"Must, get, princess, marejuices, in, body"
>Good end

>Day brown people in Equestria
>You see Zecora in ponyville market
>YOU HATE BROWN PEOPLE PONY OR NOT
>You go up to her and tap her on the maregina
>She turns around and you attack her with a machete
>"THIS IS JUST LIKE BACK HOME!"
>She orgasms instantly, and then starts popping out Zebra children
>What is that 16?
>Suddenly she gets an afro, food stamps, and welfare out of nowhere
>"Mmmhmm big momma's gonna eat good tonight!"
>She disappears
>Her children steal your wallet
>Fucking Zecora

>Day Equestria in Equestria
>You got dns" Analpie for your captcha
>Suddenly Pinkie bursts down your door
>She has a 36 inch strapon
>She beats you across the face, somehow manages to handcuff you with streamers, and then begins raping you
>You die of blood loss
>Bad end

>Day racism in Equestria
>You're walking down the street when suddenly a Zecora youth emerges from the alleyway
>"Hey ma-"
TAKE MY WALLET
>"No I'm not for tha-"
TAKE IT AND DON'T HURT ME PLEASE
>You throw your wallet to him
>"I don't want to hurt yo-"
FINE YOU CAN HAVE MY SHOES AS WELL
>You throw your shoes "Sir take these back"
N-no, you can't have that
>"Sir please, I'm trying to enjoy tonig-"
F-f-fine
>You pull down your pants and bend over
P-please be gentle
>"Fine, you know what, fuck you"
>He walks away
>Later on the ponynet
>"OH MY GOD I GOT JUMPED BY A FUCKING ZEBRA WE SHOULD KILL THEM ALL, I BEAT HIS ASS SO GOOD"
>Meanwhile you're using a horse dildo
>Weird end

>Day horrifying atrocities in Equestria
>You're eating out Fluttershy for some reason
I LIKE TO PUNCH DA PUSSY
>Suddenly you feel something stick to your tongue
>It's cheese, and not the good kind
>You vomit into her maregina which she sprays onto your face
>"So I guess unwashed filthy whores aren't your Fetish?"
>You shoot yourself in the dick, then shoot yourself in the mouth, then shoot yourself in the temple
>Atrocity end

>Day ponies in Equestria
>Ponies keep on trying to rape you
>Finally you start to take no shit
>Rope comes flying? You yank on it
>Applejack crashes down and you start wailing on her face
>Fluttershy at the door?
>Kick her in the jaw
>Finally they give up
>Good end

>Give creatine to Fluttershy
>In a rage she murders and devours all her animals
>Zyzz would be proud
>Good end

>Day Filthy Frank in Equestria
I LIKE TO PUNCH DA PUSSY
>You go around punching mareginas and kittens out of trees
>Half of the time you got stuck in them
>I don't know where I'm going with this
>So here have this
>?

>Day sleep in Equestria
>You're sleeping
>"Is sleep your fetish anon"
Yes Fluttershy
>Today was a good day

>Arrive in Equestria
>Rainbow Dash has a pair of broken wings
>There's some Sperg version of Twilight running around screaming BAKA BAKA BAKA
>Rainbow Dash has been replaced with shitstreak version of her
>Fluttershy and Applejack keep on trying to rape you
>360
>Run out of ponyville

>Day total in Equestria
>There's a COCK at the door
>Surprise, It's BITCH shy
>"Oh hi anon, I was wondering if you want to go on a picnic with us?"
Sure Fluttershy lemme grab my COCK and we can go
>"A-anon I don't think that'll be necessary"
No It's ok Fluttershy I just gotta get my FUCKING ANUS out of the fridge and we can go
>"Ok"
>Later at the picnic
Boy am I enjoying this COCK sandwich
>Everyone looks at you like you're an gay
What? Can't a man enjoy a little FUCK SHIT DICK BALLS every once in a COCK
>"You have failed the Illuminati by cursing in this land"
>You are banished to the sun
COCK DICK BALLS SHIT

>Be drug dealer anon
>Be in Equestria
>The CMC show up at your house wanting, "Special Candy"
>You give them crystal meth
>They later whore themselves out to you to get more Meth
>Good end

>Day 70 in Equestria
>Thunder is booming, lightning striking the ground in rapid succession
>You're trying to sleep, rolling over in your bed, trying to get yourself to feel tired enough to fall asleep
>There's a knock on the door
>Opening you reveal a shaking, wet scootaloo
Scootaloo, what happened
>"C-could I c-c-crash a-at y-your p-p-place tonight"
>You turn to the side and let her trot in, closing the door and heading towards the living room
>You grab a few blankets and give them to Scootaloo
You can sleep on the couch if you'd like.
>"T-thanks anon"
>You head back to bed and turn off the light
>Soon you hear steps coming up to your bed, and a certain pony throws herself up next to you
>She snuggles up close to your body, and you lazily drape your arm around her and pull her close
Goodnight Scootaloo
>"Goodnight anon"
>You fall asleep clutching the small pony

>Day heat in Equestria
>Nothing is happening because It's so fucking hot
>Two ponies die of heat stroke
>Bad end

>Be Krusty Krabs
>Arrive in Equestria
>Walk into the market
>MONEY EVERYWHERE
MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY
>You run around grabbing all the gold coins as soon as people drop them
>"Hey! Give those back!" says one angry Cyan horse
>You behead her with your claw 
>Good end

>Be sandnigger pony
>You're in the middle of a crowd
ALLAHUAKBAR
>Today was a good day

>Day SandNigger Pony in Equestria
>Fluttershy keeps on trying to guess an infidel's fetish
>You stone her for being a whore
>Good end

 Crickets, Caffeine, Cocaine, Creatine, and Codine

>Day niggers in Equestria
>Beverage
>Miro
>Dropped my fucking spaghetti on the carpet
>Fucking fluttershy
>Wingboners
>Fetishes
>I fucking DROPPED my spaghetti on the carpet
>The entire fucking area is red now
>It won't come out
>Hnnnnnnnnnng

>Be slavic anon
>You befriend Fluttershy because she reminds you of your village back home
>Eventually It's time to slaughter the pigs as they have become nice and fat
>You shoot them in between the eyes with a pellet gun and then proceed to hack off their head while they're still alive, seeing as they are paralyzed
>Fluttershy walks out and shrieks and runs up to you screaming bloody murder
Is ok! They feel no pain!
>You then spitroast the pig over an open flame
>Later you have a feast with the griffons
>Slavic end

>Day clapping in Equestria
>You awake to no sun
>The shower yields no cold fresh goodness
>Neither does the tap
>Grabbing your flashlight you walk out the door
>There are no stars
>There's no moon
>All the plants around you are dead
>Entering town you notice nobody is there
>All the windows and doors are open
>"Hello there sonny!"
>You turn and face a... a giant spool of thread?
H-hey.
>"Hold on a sec lemme just give some juice to this world and It'll start right u-"
>Suddenly Fluttershy appears and stabs him in the neck, sending him to the ground
>"Oh hi anon are dead threads your Feti-"
>You beat her to death with your flashlight and attach the spool of thread to the ground, before kicking him and turning the world back on
>Suddenly everything is back to normal
>Fucking Fluttershy

>Day nurse in Equestria
>You're working as a nurse to get some extra bits
>Today you're working on delivering a baby
>The baby got out fine, and as you were cleaning off the table and the mare, it happened
>Nasty sticky fluids sprayed onto you like a torrent of fluids
SOME GOT IN MY MOUTH! OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE ROTTEN CHEESE
>You an hero with a scalpel
>Horrifying atrocity end

>Workin' on eppeljeck farm
>"Anon why don't you fuck me"
I don't fuck horses
>She sprays you with afterbirth
>Bad end

>Day ponygone in Equestria
>Feeling the [spoiler]LOVE[/spoiler]
>The ponies didn't feel the [spoiler]LOVE[/spoiler] as much as you did
>Currently serving a life sentence for rape and molestation

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