Title:           The Swarm: The Shittening
Author:          MayorMareAnon
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/rQkxqZMJ
First Edit:      Friday 22nd of March 2013 11:34:43 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Friday 22nd of March 2013 11:34:43 PM CDT

> Day cancer in Equestria
> Wake up
> Shit, shower, shave
> Eat some Cheerilee Berry O's
> You hear something outside
> You look out the window and scrunch your face in disgust
> A swarm of Fluffyshys has enveloped your house
> "Fwuffyshy wan Anon's ass!  Fluffyshy wan ruin Anon's ass!" They all cried out in unison at the sight of you
> They cling to the glass, humping the cold window and squirting their foul hay smelling liquid
> You look away in disgust and try to figure out how to get out of this
> As you pondered, a even more foul stench reaches your nose
> "Why Fwuffyshy no smeww pretty?"
> Looking outside you saw the swarm of Fluffshys taking large dumps on your lawn and house
"NOOOOOO!!!!!!!"
> You hardly could breathe with the smell of shit filled the air
> "A-ANON.....  THIS IS FLUTTERSHY."
> Struggling to your feet, you see Fluttershy holding a blow horn outside, startling the Fluffies and causing them to shit them even more
> "A-ANON, IF YOU DO NOT GIVE ME YOUR CHIMP DICK..... I-I'LL HAVE TO KEEP THIS UP."
> Opening the window slightly, you ignore the smell and yelled out
"NEVER!"
> Quickly closing it, you run to the only place you know that would be free of the taint
> Running to the top of the stairs with the last ounce of strength left, you open and close the door, jumping and landing on your bed
> You closed your eyes and attempt to drown out the constant chirping of the Fluffshys
> Hours later you awaken to find them all asleep
> Quietly walking downstairs, you quickly fix yourself something to eat
> Closing the curtains in the kitchens and lighting up a candle, you look in the cabinets
> Grabbing a can of chef Boaryardee ravioli along with a fork and bowl, you dump the delicious food into the bowl and microwaved it
> As you stood there, you heard something
> "Waaaa.  Fwuffyshy smeww sketties!"
"Shit...."
> Soon the house was alive with the sound of countless Fluffies trying to break in
> Most tackled the house, breaking their necks and bodies and crying out for hugs
> Those that were injured were trampled and stepped on by their friends and family in the attempt of breaking into your house
> The house was once again aflame with ceaseless chatter and the sounds of the Fluffyshys' insane gibbering
> As the microwaved beeped you quickly grabbed the bowl and ran upstairs, ignoring the searing heat
> Just as you reached the stairs, one of the windows broke
> "G-get him my pretties!"
> At the sound of Fluttershy's command, the Fluffyshys piled upon each other, smothering and crushing those below them
> As they reached up to the window, many of them disembowel or cut them upon the broken glass
> "NUUUUUU!!"
> "No wan owwies!"
> "Need huggies!"
> As the bodies fell to the ground, spilling urine, blood, and their guts on your carpet, you raced up the stairs
> "Daddeh!  Wait!"
> The Fluffies began trotting towards you, those who had mastered their wings hopped towards you
> "Wan speciaw hugs!"
> Opening your door, you quickly got inside and began barricading the door
> After a few minutes you hear light tapping on the door
> "Fwuffyshy wan daddeh coom!"
> They continued to tap on the door and babbled for hours
> You tried again and again to sleep but it eludes you
> "A-ANON."
> Sighing, you open the window and look to see Fluttershy with the blow horn
> "D-DO YOU GIVE UP NOW?"
"NO!"
> "O-OKAY."
> She threw the blow horn at you
> Dodging, you avoided the damn thing but the window broke
> As you went to grab something to clean it, you hear a buzzing noise
> A living mound of Fluffyshy clash against the side of your house, propelled by the collective power of their tiny weak wings
> Climbing and stepping on each other, they were like a living carpet of yellow and pink fluff
> They slowly crept towards the broken window
> The first of the few sliced themselves upon the broken glass, their blood and insides spilling out
> Some cried out for hugs, other begged for death
> “Wan die now!”
> “Fwuffyshy needs huggies!”
> The rest merely walked over their comrades and waddled towards you adorably
"No!  Stay back!"
> "Huggies!"
> "Speciaw huggies!"
> "Coooom!"
> As they waddled towards you, you remembered your bowl of ravioli
> Grabbing it, you shouted at the top of your lungs
"SKETTIES!"
> They instantly stopped and began drooling
> "WAN SKETTIES!"
> "GIB FWUFFYSHY SKETTIES!"
> You threw it at Fluttershy, hitting the bowl on her head and spilling it all over her
> The Fluffies jumped out of the window and plummeted to the ground
> Their bodies and heads cracked as blood and organs spilled out of their mouths
> You opened the door and began kicking away the mounds of Fluff as they clung to your legs and humped you furiously
> As you fought your way through, you ran towards the forest as the remaining Fluffies gave chase
> You ran as your legs burned
> After what seemed like hours you stopped and rested
> The chirping and chatter of Fluffyshys was absent in the air and you knew you were safe for now
> The question was, what will you do against the swarm?