Title:           FR - The Crawl Space
Author:          Mad_Sandwich
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/D5AsasBC
First Edit:      Friday 15th of August 2014 11:36:12 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Last edit on: Friday 26th of December 2014 01:03:29 AM CDT

>Day 253 in Equestria
 
>Be Anon
>Be very fucking pissed Anon, because something is making a loud noise.
One fucking morning! Just one fucking morning without some neon horse motherfucker waking me up, that's all I ask!
>You can hear scratching. Lots of scratching, and that's never a good thing, not with these fucking ponies.
I swear to god, Yellowquie- ..wait.
>Wait a damn minute. You put your ear to the floodboards.
The crawl space.
>You shudder.
>You specifically requested no crawl space, but these multicolored marshmallow fucks added one anyway.
>You and crawl spaces ain't exactly on speaking terms, ever since you crawled under your grandmas house, and got covered in spiders.
Nope. Not going into that shit without a weapon!
>Grabbing a magical lantern, a hairspray can, duct tape and a forever burning candle, you McGyver that shit together and make a Alien-esque flamethrower.
>Kick your door open loudly, scaring several ponies nearby. They stare at you as you pull the crawl space door open, and crawl inside, flamethrower in hand.
>It's dark. And cramped. And full of spiders. Fucking. Spiders.
>Your shitty magic lantern illuminates a few feet ahead of you, but it's still as dark as a goth's diary.
What I wouldn't do for a fucking Maglite..
>You crawl ahead, winding your way through the cramped space, listening for signs of life.
>Somehow, the crawl space is almost impossibly long and maze-like. And very hot.
>You're sweating like a pig. A pig in a volcano. A pig made out of bacon.. Mmm.. Bacon..
Shit, now I'm boiling to death AND hungry..
>Wiping the sweat from your brow, you listen carefully.
>Suddenly, you hear it. Scratching from ahead. Or was it from behind?
>The noise reverberates through the small space, seemingly coming from multiple directions.
>You raise your flamethrower, and nervously press on, the noise surrounding you.
COME ON YELLOWQUIET! THIS SHIT AIN'T FUNNY ANYMORE!
>The noise intensifies, and your head fills with scenes from Horror movies, of people getting stalked in tunnels, or turning around to see-
>"Anon?"
JESUSFUCKINGCHRIST-
>You instinctively fire the flamer, igniting your pants.
MOTHERFUCKER THAT'S HOT!!
>You screech like a mad gibbon, screaming unmentionable insults and tearing your flaming pants off, barely saving your dick from becoming a hot dog.
>Throwing your burning pants away, you turn as best as you can in the cramped tunnel, and see Fluttershy, dressed in a stupid monster costume.
>She notices your pants-less state, staring at your junk with a bright pink face, and a grin plastered on her face.
>"Oh, anon! I knew you would come around! I knew being stalked in confined spaces was your fetish!"
>She's on you in a second, and there isn't a damn thing you can do. As she begins licking at your limp cock, you frantically look around.
>The flamethrower.
>Grabbing it, you turn it around, and pull the trigger.
>The flames engulf you, and Fluttershy jumps back to avoid getting set on fire too.
>As she begins panicking, you let the cleansing fire sweep over you.
>You're burning to death, but at least you aren't
>Fucking Fluttershy.