Language Barrier, part 3 and 4

The trip to the castle was brief.  Once the researchers got your crate to the castle, a pair of armored ponies took over.  Guards, you supposed.  You had stopped the 'wild animal' act not long after being taken from wherever you had arrived.

 

Once the crate was brought to a room, you heard Princess Celestia say something in that pony language.  You heard the guards walk away.  Soon, the crate opens, the lid lifting off on its own.  "It's okay to come out now.  There shouldn't be anyp0ny around."

 

Standing, you stretch, wincing as a few places pop.  Looking around, you seemed to be in a throne room of sorts.  The throne had a waterfall coming from the sides, running into a little channel which ran off into one of the walls.  "...classy place you've got here."

 

Another of those subtle smiles appears on Celestia's face.  "I suppose it does have some charm to it.  Shall I give you a tour?" she asks, a quill writing on a scroll as they float in front of her.  "After all, you'll be here for a week, at least.  My student would come immediately if I asked, but I would prefer she take her time to learn and practice the spell."

 

"Uh... sure.  Sounds good," you reply, climbing the rest of the way out of the crate.  After a bit of thought, you grab the tarp and wrap it around you.  It wasn't much, but it was better than walking around in just your skivvies around royalty.

 

Soon, you're following her through the castle as she describes the room you're walking through.  You're only half-listening though, thinking over your situation as you watch her mane and tail wafting on that unseen, unfelt breeze.

 

Some sort of dining room.  You hoped there wouldn't be too many different things about what they ate.  But then, if you got too hungry, maybe you'd get desperate enough to eat grass or something.  Hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

 

A small sort of study.  The paper might be nice, but all the books would be useless to you until you learn the language.  At least you could draw, or write for your own enjoyment.

 

A balcony overlooking some sort of garden.  At least, you think it was.  It was a big field of green with occasional splotches of color to you.  Fucking nearsightedness.  Those splotches could have been ponies off in the distance, for all you knew.  Hopefully, there was something that could be done.

 

...  You were far far from home.

 

The tour continued.  You were in a hallway when you noticed it.  The 'wind' blowing Princess Celestia's mane and tail started to shift.  Like the sun coming out from behind a pastel, multicolored cloud, rather... intimate... parts were revealed as her tail began to billow off to the side.  And like exposure to the sun, while you might be able to look a little, you had to avert your eyes, face taking on the hue of a rather bad sunburn.

 

"So, have you seen anything interesting since your arrival, Anonymous?" she asked, voice just as casual as ever.  Was she aware?  She didn't show any indication, if she was.

 

"Ah... err... um..." you began, eyes darting around.  "These... uh... stained glass windows are kinda neat."  You nodded.  Yes.  A good thing to focus on instead.  To be polite.  Because that is a horse.  Why the heck would that bother you, you wondered.  "...I... err... don't know if I'm getting all the detail, though.  My glasses didn't come with me.  My eyes are kinda bad."

 

Looking back over her shoulder, Celestia raised a brow.  "Oh?  I'm sure there is something we can do.  Perhaps arrange for replacements during your stay."  She nods and gives another of her smiles.  "I'm sure we can give a better look when you can see properly.  The gardens are quite a sight from the balcony, after all, as is the city."

 

You nod.  It was just an innocent turn of a phrase.  She's talking about the tour.  "R-right."  She gives a cheerful smile, then continues on, talking about the windows and their history.

 

The rest of the tour went by without event, even though the 'wind' didn't shift back the entire way, forcing you to actually look around at where you were.  Eventually, she stops beside a door, which opens to reveal a modest little room.  Your bed had apparently been moved there during the tour.  "...and here is where you'll be staying.  I'll have something to eat brought up.  Is fruit okay to start with?"

 

"Err... yes.  Fruit will be fine."  You stroll into the room, then sit on your bed.  Thank goodness that was over.  "Thank you, Princess."

 

Another cheerful smile is given.  "You're welcome.  I'll make sure to let my sister know of you, so there isn't any confusion, should you two cross paths.  Pleasant dreams, Anonymous!"

 

You wave as she turns to stroll away.  "You too.  Thanks again."  The door closes itself, and you lay down, using the tarp as another blanket.  A sigh escapes you.  Maybe you could get a bit of that sleep that you had taken by this having happenned.

 

It was dark when you awoke.  With a low mumble, you rub your eyes.  What a weird dream.  You fumble around, feeling for your nightstand.  Prying your eyes open, you look around.  There was some sort of low glow in the room.  You push yourself upright, turning to look toward the glow.

 

Oh god.  Ohgodohgod... There was SOMETHING in the darkness of your room.  A shadow with slightly glowing eyes, staring right at you.  A field of glowing, star-like pinpricks billowed around it, only driving home the silhouette.  You must be having a nightmare.  That must be it.  You'll wake up now that you know you're dreaming, right?  Any moment now.

 

It shifted, moving toward you.  ...Aaaaaany moment now.  You draw your covers up to your chin like you hadn't done since childhood.  There was a brief flash, and light spread in the room, glowing through your tightly clenched eyelids.  When the gnashing of cruel, jagged teeth didn't come, hesitantly you opened an eye.

 

The room was lit by candles, floating in midair. Where the object of your terror had been, sat a dark blue pony, staring intently as its star-filled mane billowed around it.  Eyelids slid over those intense eyes like a shadow before sliding up again.  You relaxed slightly as your worries of being eaten by some horrible monster fade, then slouch a bit as you realize you may not have been dreaming that stuff about telekinetic pastel ponies after all.

 

The door openned to admit a floating plate of various fruits, then closed once again.  The plate settled in front of you on the bed.  You recognized the fruits on it, so apparently your world and it weren't horribly different.

 

"Err... thank you," you state, picking up a peach.  "Probably don't understand me, but you want some?" you ask, offering another of the fuzzy fruit.

 

"We have already eaten, but thank you," replied the pony in a firm, yet female voice.

 

You pause, just short of taking a bite.  This one was talking your language as well.  How long had you been out?

 

"Our sister told us of your arrival.  We..."  She pauses.  "I, rather.  I decided that I should make a judgement of your character as well."

 

You nod, then lower the peach.  "Err... right.  It's nice to meet you.  My name is Anonymous."  You glance at the peach again.  "How did you..?"  Your question trails off into vague guestures, eventually settling on the 'talky talky' motion with a hand.

 

She raises a brow.  "I too know the translation spell that my sister used."  She nods respectfully.  "I am Luna, Princess of the Night.  Well met, Anonymous."

 

You bow slightly.  "Err... sorry."  You guesture to the fruit.  "May I eat as we talk, your highness?"  After a nod of approval, you finally took a bite of the peach.  

 

After a brief pause, you hastily finish the peach.  "That was one of the best peaches I think I've ever had."  Though, lately your experience with peaches were of the canned variety.  You eye the other peach thoughtfully.  "You sure you don't want one, highness?  They're preeeeetty taaaaasty," you offer again, tossing the peach from hand to hand as you make the sing-song expression of their taste.

 

You earned a smile for your efforts.  "The offer is appreciated, but I shall refuse."  She guestures with a hoof.  "The formality is appreciated though, Anonymous.  Enjoy."

 

You nod, catching the peach.  "So, do you prefer 'your majesty', 'your highness', 'your excellency', or just your name and/or title?  I wouldn't want to get on the bad side of one of my hostesses during my unplanned vacation."  As you eat the second peach, you grab an apple to occupy your spare hand.

 

Luna nods.  "While we do not mind being called by name, whatever title, within reason, is acceptable to me.  Learning proper protocol is an admirable trait.  One that has fallen by the wayside at times, it seems at times."

 

You finish the peach, placing its pit next to the first.  "So no using silly names like 'nova noggin' or 'Princess Plasma Pants'. Duly noted, highness," you reply with an innocent smile.

 

"Indeed.  I would not wish for one to be confused.  Nova Noggin wrote many fine books on astronomy in his day."

 

"Wait... really?"

 

A smile is her immediate response.  "You shall need to learn the language well, then you can find out."  You frown in response, starting on the apple.  Princess Luna sat there, watching you eat.

 

Putting the core with the peach pits, you stand and stretch.  "Not exactly the best decor in this particular room.  I don't suppose I could get a tour around, your highness?"

 

A raised brow.  "Did our sister not give a tour on your arrival?"

 

Rubbing the back of your neck, you cough nervously.  "Well, she did, but I was a little distracted.  New world, new intelligent race I've never seen, no eyeglasses, and so on.  Plus, my memory can be spotty at times.  A second time around should at least help get everything down." You look over the plate again.  ...was that a kiwi?  Score!  "Of course, I understand if royal duties don't allow, your highness."

 

"Our duties are few, Anonymous.  The moon has been raised, so I have time."  She turns and walks out the door, which opens itself for her.  She pauses and gives an expectant look at you.  Wrapping the tarp around yourself and grabbing the kiwi, you follow, taking a position to the side and slightly behind the princess, to prevent another awkward situation like the last tour.

 

The tour was quieter this time.  Except for a few words as notable places were passed, only the quiet clip clop of hooves could be heard.  Fortunate, as you were busy eating a fuzzy, brown-skinned fruit.

 

Eventually, you noted that you didn't recognize some of the things you were passing.  "...I don't know if I was taken through here last time."

 

"That would be understandable," she replied.  The two of you walk out into what must be the gardens you saw earlier.  "These areas usually have a few ponies going about their business during the day.  At night, these are travelled by few, except for the occasional guard."

 

"I suppose that's one thing about the night.  Peaceful.  ...If that's a good thing or a bad thing is all in how one looks at it."  You look up to the sky.  "...man.  Too bad I don't have my glasses.  Bet the stars would be great here.  Don't get to see 'em that much."

 

The dark blue pony slowed as she escorted you around the garden.  "Oh?"

 

Nodding, you adjust your tarp-cloak-thing.  "Yeah.  Where I'm from... unless one went out into the countryside, there's so much artificial light that you can't really see the stars that well.  Unfortunately, there aren't many jobs out in the countryside, so city life is kinda what I was stuck with."

 

The princess nods, continuing on.  You weren't certain, but she may have been explaining things a bit more.  The tour stretched on deep into the night.

 

=======

 

As the tour came to a close, it was nearing morning.  The princess stopped at the balcony overlooking the gardens.  "It is time for me to lower the moon to make way for my sister's sun.  It has been a pleasant night.  Our thanks for your company."  She gave a respectful nod, openning her wings.

 

"It was nice.  Thank you, your majesty."  You give a slight bow as she takes flight.  You pause.  Did  she say 'lower the moon'?  That can't be right.  That'd be nuts.  That's the territory of crazed despots and stuff.

 

You awkwardly rub the back of your neck at the thought, deciding to just watch the sunrise.  At least you could still appreciate some things.

 

Eventually, you get tired of looking at the pretty colors and return to your room.  Grabbing an apple from the plate, you idly gnaw off a piece to chew on.  Not even a day in a strange, new world, and you were already feeling somewhat the same.  Like visiting some foreign country where you don't understand the language.  Only, the people are ponies.

 

You can't help but feel you should be more upset over your situation than you are.  No job?  Not like you had much going for you there.  No home?  Ehh... a little something there.  Family never seen again?  ...well, they were a bunch of infighting pricks.  Never see another human again?  Yeah, a little disturbing.

 

Another bite of apple, and you look at it.  Come to think of it, these ponies probably didn't eat meat.  No more bacon.  Ever.  Yeah.  That was something you could wrap your mind around.  It stung a bit.

 

Twinkies.  That was another thing you could wrap your mind around.  Those moist spongecakes filled with cream would never again grace your taste buds.  One of those little things you could rely on always being around, but now couldn't.

 

Your mind drifts to other things as you take another bite of apple.  Video games.  Terrible commercials for things you'll never buy.

 

You would continue, but the door to your room opens.  "Good morning, Anonymous.  I hope you slept well?" came the cheery voice of the other princess.

 

"Well enough, I guess.  Woke up in the middle of the night, got another tour from Princess Luna."  You offer the plate of fruit to her as well.  A banana floats off of it and over to her, peeling itself on the way.  "Maybe I'm in shock or something.  I feel like I should be more upset than I am."

 

Nodding, Celestia takes a dainty nibble from the banana.  "Perhaps.  If you need anything, feel free to ask."  

 

"Thanks, Princess.  I guess some paper and ink might be handy.  If nothing else, it'd be something for me to do."  You set the apple core aside.  "...maybe some needle and thread.  A tarp's not exactly the fanciest clothes for talking to royalty.  Maybe I can make something a bit less awkward.  ...but that can wait, I guess.  No rush.  I'm sure you've got a busy life."

 

"I'll see that you get what you need," she replies, finishing the banana.  Nodding your thanks, you pull the covers over yourself for a nap.

 

As you hear the door close, your eyes pop back open when a thought hits you.  That pony just swallowed almost an entire banana.  All at once.  Sliding your gaze briefly toward the door, you felt a frown on your face.

 

"...She... probably just wanted to make a graceful exit.  Impolite to leave before finishing a meal and all that."  Yeah.  That made sense.  Plus, running a nation was probably a busy thing sometimes.  You pull the covers over your head as you curl up.  The alternative was... slightly disturbing.

 

Her wings are somewhat pretty th--No.  No no noNo no no NO.  Not even going to start down that line of thought. No.  That way lies madness.  Plus, trying to bone royalty, NOT THAT YOU WOULD, probably would get you tossed in some dungeon or something.  Plus, that is a HORSE.  Hay-eating, just the right size to plant a hoof in your balls, telekinetic HORSE.

 

Less than a day, and already the thought of an alcohol vacation was crossing your mind.  You sincerely hoped that this wasn't some sort of sign for how things were going to be during your stay there.  Sleep, when it came, was fitful and plagued with unusual dreams.

 

It was still daylight when you woke.  Untangling yourself from your sheets, you squint in the dim light of the room.  There was a little table in it now.  Seriously.  It came up about to the middle of your thigh.  Put a cushion on it, and it could be a seat.

 

As requested, there was a stack of paper, a few quills, and an inkwell.  A candle rested there as well.  ...  Unfortunately, there wasn't anything to LIGHT the candle with.  Oh well.  It didn't matter at the moment.  Moving the candle aside, you tucked the paper under your arm, grabbed the quills and ink, then picked up the stool... err... table.

 

Soon, you were in the light at the balcony, kneeling by the table.  You stared at a blank page, wondering just what to do with it.  Idly, you fold the short edge to one of the long edges.  Folding the rest over the resulting triangle, you crease it well before tearing the excess off.  With familiar motions, you fold and turn the paper, turning it into a tiny paper frog.  Puffing it up with a breath of air, you smile and set it down.  "There. Now I suppose I've got some company, right Mr. Froggie?  Ribbit ribbit."

 

Picking up the quill, you think for a moment before dipping it in ink.  What's a frog without a pond to sit in?  Idly, you doodle a lily pad big enough for the frog to sit on.  After a bit of thought, you put a bit more detail into the lily pad.  A few ripples are added around it, as if it were floating.  Smiling at your work, you place the frog on its new home.

 

"He looks happier already, doesn't he?"  You pause as you hear the voice, quill halfway to the inkwell again.  You hadn't even heard anyone approach.  Looking to your side, you spied Celestia almost right behind you.  "I just wanted to extend an invitation to dinner and a talk with my sister and I, after sunset."

 

"...okay.  I guess I'll be there, Princess."  You set down the quill as the frog and the drawing each begin to float up for the Princess to peruse.

 

That slight smile lingers on her face as she looks them over.  "These are quite nicely done," she says, returning them to the table and turning that smile on you.

 

You give one in return and shrug.  "It was more just being silly, really, but thank you, Princess."  Thinking, you slide a piece of paper over and offer the quill.  "I was just doing it while I was trying to think of something to do.  Say, I don't suppose you could make a quick map to where I'm supposed to go for that, Princess?  Just landmark to landmark's good enough.  Or even just turn by turn or something."

 

Nodding, the quill floats from your hand, then draws a quick map.  "Hopefully this will be good enough."  The quill lays back down.  "If that was just you being silly, it might be nice to see what you could do if you applied yourself.  See you later tonight, Anon."  One more cheerful smile, then Princess Celestia turned to continue with her day.

 

You look at the blank paper in front of you thoughtfully.  How long had it been since you applied yourself with a drawing?

 

The rest of the day, you spent trying to remember exercises from way back in high school.  Many drawings of your hands were done, in various poses.  There were a few little cartoony doodles you did when you were pleased or disgusted with how you did on one.  In some respects, you were lucky.  Your high school art teacher actually taught stuff, instead of being one of those touchy-feely sorts that didn't teach squat.

 

You look at the stack of papers you had filled up, then out to the moon smoothly rising above the horizon and into the air.  Hopefully it wasn't too late.  Scooting the table around the corner for later collection, you gather your papers, leaving the frog and his lily pad.

 

Following the map, you eventually wind up outside a door with one dark blue armored pony and one gold armored pony standing on each side of it.  They glance at you briefly, then return their gaze forward, looking a little more serious about their job.  Glancing at the map, then to the door again, you shrug and head over to one of the guards.

 

"Hey, I know you can't understand me, but this map the princess gave me led me to this door for a dinner invitation?" you explain to the guard, using lots of guestures to get the point across.  You wait for a while before the doors open.  The guards glance at the door, then to you, then forward again.  They guesture toward the door with a wing each.

 

You smile, give a polite nod, then stroll inside, where a large table stretches across the room, only the part on the far end set.

 

The princesses sit at the table, idly talking in their language.  They pause, then smile in your direction.  "Good evening, Princesses.  I hope I didn't keep you waiting."

 

"No, we just got here not too long ago.  I finished lowering the sun and Luna raised the moon, and then we came over here," replies Celestia.  Your eye twitches slightly as you stroll toward the extra chair that had been pulled out.  Oh geez.  There were two of them.  And they seemed so nice, too.  "Feel free to have as much as you like."

 

"Thank you, Princess."  You take a seat.  Just what does one talk about when faced with two delusional rulers in a dining setting?  "Certainly quite the selection."  You look at the various dishes.  Fortunately, you weren't fibbing as much as you thought you were.  On the table were various types of breads, a few salads, various vegetables, boiled eggs carved into fanciful bird designs, a bowl nestled in a basket of rolls held a rainbow of different jams, molded together to look like an apple, and a few vases of flowers decorating the table as well.  You weren't sure how long it had been since you had seen such a spread.

 

...but notably, no meat.  Considering that they were ponies, that made sense.  There were eggs, though.  Did ponies eat eggs?  You guessed these did.  "We hope you do not mind serving yourself.  The servants were excused for this meal," stated Luna, a few flowers floating from the vases to her plate.  ...  Okay, maybe the flowers weren't just decoration.

 

"I probably wouldn't know what to do if they hadn't been excused," you admitted, putting a few things on your plate.

 

Nodding, Celestia smiled another smile.  Was that her default expression or something?  "That's quite all right."  She takes a sip of water.  "I see you brought your paper with you.  Anything new that you wouldn't mind sharing?"

 

"Sure, Princess, if you'll pass the salt.  It's only some practice stuff that I haven't done in ages, though."  As the stack of paper floats over for Celestia to look through, the salt and pepper float over.  With a smile, you take them and add some to where it was needed.  "Thanks, Celestia," you add, setting the shakers down.

 

There's a brief pause.  She raises a brow, then turns to speak with her sister in their language.  There's a bit of dialog before Celestia smiles and returns to looking at the drawings.  "These are quite nice.  Would you mind if I sent some to my pupil tomorrow?  It would help to let her know a little about you and the situation before she gets here."

 

"Feel free.  Not like I was going to do anything with them," you reply before taking another bite.  She idly starts flipping through the pages.

 

"Would you care for something to drink, Anonymous?  The lemonade is quite pleasant," offers Luna.  She looks toward a decanter which floats toward you.  Mouth full, you nod, and the decanter fills your glass.

 

You swallow, then raise your glass to the darker pony with a smile.  "Thank you, your majesty."

 

There is another distinctive pause.  The two look at each other, then turn a pair of concerned expressions toward you.  Celestia sets down your drawings.  "...what?  Did I say something wrong?  Was I not supposed to do that?"

 

The two turn toward each other again, chatting for a moment in their language before returning their concerned expressions toward you.  "No, you've done nothing wrong, Anon, but... we would like you to answer honestly..." begins Celestia.

 

An egg floats up above the table, rotating slowly.  Their gaze stays focused on you the entire time.  You raise a brow curiously before the white princess continues, "Can you tell me which one of us is making the egg float above the table?"

 

"...what?"

 

"It's a simple question.  ...a bit of a test for something, if you will."  Celestia smiles, but that slightly concerned look remains.  It did nothing to relax you, if that was the purpose.

 

"I..."  You blink, moving your gaze between each of them and the egg.  "Is it Princess Luna?" you ask, uncertain.  "I'm kinda guessing here."

 

They share another concerned glance.  "Anon... How long have you been mage-blind?" Celestia asks.

 

Confusion must be dominating your expression, as Luna speaks up.  "Mage-blindness is a condition either from birth or from damage that prevents somepony from being able to see magic.  Have you ever been able to do so?"

 

"Err... no.  There's no such thing as magic.  ...on my world."  You look between the two as they share another concerned glance.  They're looking at you like people would look at someone they just met that didn't have arms.