- >Equestria day 3
- >I...should join 4chans /mlp/ post for this shouldn't I?
- ---------------------
- >>You and Dash chatted it up last night
- >>She's a pretty cool gal really
- >>Cant wait to see if she can drink you under the table
- >>Or is it over the table
- >>Aside from getting hammered out of her mind
- >>She also claims to go faster than you
- >>Perform better acrobatics than you
- >>And is the definition of cool
- >>Aside from that second one, its all bull
- >>From what you CAN remember, you were one hell of a drinker as a human
- >>Have a liver of fuckin steel for ya to down that much
- >>Well, thank god sleep claimed ya
- >>Except that annoying Dash was talking out loud in the middle of the night
- >>The fuck is she doing over there
- "Dash, the hell are you doing?"
- >>You move the curtain separating you two
- >>She's sitting there with a book between her hooves
- >>Seriously now
- >>How the FUCK do pony's do this shit
- >>Unless they have some magic or tech, how do they hold things like that at all
- >>Anyways,
- >>Dash practically fumbles with the book and shoves up under her pillow
- >>"Huh, wha? Oh, Bolt, umm...hey, whats up?"
- >>....
- >>....
- >>Ok, weird...
- "Wondering why you were so loud. Was that a book?"
- >>"Yes-No, wait, I mean N-no of course not. Books are for egg heads."
- >>You raise an eyebrow, she blushes
- >>If not for being a pony, she looks so cute you just d'aw inside
- "So Im an egghead AND Im faster then you."
- >>She got flustered again
- >>"There's no way an egghead could beat me in a race!"
- >>You huff and grab the curtain again
- "Well I read books a lot, so I guess I do both."
- >>Pull the curtain between you two, act asleep
- >>"There's no way he could beat me. But if he reads books, then, I guess everyone does."
- >>You hear her toss around and mutter quietly as she reads her book
- >>Smile while you sleep
- ---------------------
- >>Wake up and stretch your wings
- >>Doctor came and let Dash out of the hospital
- >>She seemed sad for leaving, maybe it was just because you were there
- >>Doc says you have to stay a little longer, let those legs heal properly
- >>Considering you have more flying to do, your gonna need it
- >>But fuck if I have any ideas to make up for a week
- >>Dick jokes and memes only get you so far in a fanfic before it gets old
- >>And I would hate another skip so early but
- >>Fuck it
- >>Skip a week ahead, so lets recap what you'll miss
- >>Hospital food, Dash visits often, You read up on pegasus acrobatics
- >>Crack a few dick jokes and toss some sunglasses moments in there
- >>There's a whole 7 days of what you'll miss
- >>Never let this end up in the hospital again
- >>EVER
- ---------------------
- >>Doc finally lets you out of the hospital
- >>Have to 'take it easy' with those legs for a bit though
- >>Fuck that, you have a pony to race
- >>....and drink under the table
- "Now if I were a pegasus, where would I be?"
- >>...
- >>Ok not sure if that was an intended joke or not
- >>Work on it later, now you need to find out what pony's do around here-
- >>"Hey Bolt!"
- >>Crash right in front of you, Dash is standing there
- >>You, you look dumbstruck like a moron
- >>"Whats the matter? Know your going to lose now?"
- >>Psh, she's so full of herself
- "Maybe in a million years you can beat me."
- >>You take off in the air, given your newfound knowledge on pegasuses, this is a lot easier than the first time you tired
- >>Speed, agility, grace, yeah that book is a help
- >>"Getting sure of yourself there?"
- >>She zooms up to you, and you get a taste of how fast she is
- >>Fuck what have you gotten yourself into
- "Name the place then, I'll show you just what i can do."
- >>She gives a smirk
- >>"Follow me then."
- >>You both fly off, but FUCK
- >>If you were to describe your flying, you fly like fluttershy on a good day
- >>Need to find a way to fly faster and quick
- >>Hell no your going to try that...thing you did again
- >>Fuck that, too fast for you...well for right now
- >>You fly like a filly and as good as fluttershy
- >>"Come one Bolt, I thought you could dust me."
- >>Fuck, think man, THINK
- "Just...enjoying the view. Never been to...this place before"
- >>Dash just stops mid-flight and you nearly ram into her
- >>"Well, lets get you a tour of PonyVille,"
- >>Thank god
- >>"And have that race at the same time!"
- >>Fuck me
- >>"Or are you gonna chicken out and admit Im the best?"
- >>Oh FUCK NO
- >>She is gonna eat those words
- "Hell no, hope you can eat my dust better this time."
- >>You smirk and she directs you to the starting line
- >>Your gonna race through town and end up finishing at 'apple acres'
- >>Damn you and your pride, this race wont end well
- >>"Alright, ready, set, GO!"
- >>You both take off at full speed
- >>Lucky you though, either your better when your nerves are over the edge or she's not at full speed.
- >>Either way, your keeping up with Dash
- >>"That's Sugercube Corner, Thats the library, Day spa, School house, You know the hospital..."
- >>She's talking a million words a second, god you cant keep up with it at all
- >>Then she blasts ahead of you, fuck she was going slow
- >>Dammit your not gonna lose to her if your life depended on it
- >>Ok, how are you gonna get faster then
- >>You think of that and you feel an updraft come from below
- >>Ok, this you should know
- >>Your wings pull slightly up and the draft takes you faster than you once were
- >>God damn, your loving this already
- >>The speed, the rush, the adrenaline in your veins
- "Fucking want more!"
- >>You tuck in more, your wings tilt up and you catch more air
- >>The speed, your catching up to her
- >>Have to catch and beat her before
- >>Farm, up ahead
- >>Fuck
- >> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTHsOSGJHN0
- "Wings dont fail me NOW DAMN YOU!"
- >>You feel yourself blast forward, almost like when you turning into a living rocket
- >>Your trailing smoke and fire again
- >>FUUUUCK
- >>You pass Dash easy enough at this speed, literally leaving her in the dust
- >>Too fast dammit, TOO FAST
- >>How did those things slow down
- >>Well they had engines so im guessing they just went backwards
- >>No wait, if they went too far up they started to slow
- >>Yeah, thats right, gravity should slow your ass down enough
- >>You hope, if not, goodbye legs
- >>Soar up to the sun, trailing smoke and fire as you climb
- >>Everypony can see it for miles, like a beacon in the night sky
- >>Er, like a smoke pillar in the morning sun
- >>You finally lose enough speed from gravity that you can descend properly
- >>Though Dash is siting on the ground watching you in awe
- >>When you touch down, your panting for breath
- "T-Told ya....I was...the best."
- >>"I said the one to reach the farm first, you didn't."
- >>She points at your escaping smoke trail and all you can do is groan
- >>You pulled up just before you reached the fucking farm
- >>Technically you lose, so...fuck
- "Technicality, You know i would have won anyways."
- >>Dash just rolls her eyes
- >>"Yeah yeah, come on then bigshot, drinks on me."
- >>She holds out a hoof
- >>You bump it with yours
- >>Somewhere in the back of your mind, it screams 'brohoof' at you
- >>Cant imagine why, but whatever
- >>Time to get hammered
- ---------------------
- >>Your both at the bar after Dash's shift ends
- >>Apparently she got that race in during her break, leaving you to enjoy...whatever till she was done
- >>If that just means learning how to fly faster and better, than sure
- >>Not much help you could hear her laugh sometimes when you passed
- >>Well, doesn't matter, your both shitfaced by now
- >>"Damn Bolt, your..one *hic* fast fucker."
- "Me? Nah, YOUR the *hic* fast fuck around here."
- >>"Nah, you woulda, *hic* woulda won if you didn't panic like a *hic* filly."
- "Who you callin a- *hic* filly for?"
- >>"You drunk, cant even *hic* hold down your booze."
- "Fuck you, gimmie another shot!"
- >>Barkeep looks at the two of you and shrugs, puts a shot glass infront of you two and pours something in it
- >>You assume its alcohol but fuck if you know, your too drunk off your ass to figure it out
- >>Down the thing at the same time as Dash
- >>"Hey Bolt, *hic* you gotta place to crash tonight?"
- "Wha..?"
- >>"You just arrived, gotta place to crash?"
- >>In your drunken state you assume 'crash' is literally crashing into something
- "No, shou- *hic* should I?"
- >>"Yeah you should! Come on *hic* your crashin at my place."
- >>Fuckin drunk logic
- >>Against your drunken minds best attempt at filly education, you and Dash fly to her place
- >>Well, more like float around the town and bump into everything
- >>Not sure if you drank her under the table or if she drunk YOU under it
- >>Fuck if you know, or care
- >>Gave no shits today...or any that you remember
- >>Dash opens door to her cloud house...or mansion in your drunken awe
- >>Though, two steps in, your passed out on the couch
- >>Dash is right behind you, literally too
- >>Passed out on top of you
- >>Guess she won that one too....
- >>Damn
Pastebin launched a little side project called HostCabi.net, check it out ;-)Don't like ads? PRO users don't see any ads ;-)
Text below is selected. Please press Ctrl+C to copy to your clipboard. (⌘+C on Mac)
create a new version of this paste
RAW Paste Data