Title: At Any Price Author: ImmortalAnon Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/YTBWEfSy First Edit: Sunday 10th of August 2014 06:09:51 PM CDT Last Edit: Sunday 10th of August 2014 06:09:51 PM CDT >One cold winter's night, a small filly lies wrapped up warmly in her sheets, a frail old pony watching her from a stool next to the bed >"Will you tell me a story before bed, Grandpa?" "Of course I will, Precious. How about the one about the white stallion and the red dragon? It's one of your favourties, is it not?" >"I want to hear a new story Grandpa, you gotta have loads you ain't told me yet..." "Well, does the name Anonymous mean anything to you, Precious?" >"I've never heard that before, who is it?" "I'm not surprised you haven't heard it, most do not believe he ever existed, and those who do learn to fear the name." >"Do you believe in it, Grandpa?" "Would you believe me if I said I've seen the creature with my own two eyes?" >"Oh, please please tell me the story, Grandpa" "Okay, Precious, settle down and I'll begin..."   -------------------------------------------------   >Be Anon >You are just finishing up a PhD in Engineering >Well, not right now, right now you're bleeding profusely onto your steering wheel >Someone's talking in your ear, your fading conciousness can't make out a word of it though >"Are...wai/'';'#;';one's;..;[;#.';help..." >Darkness encroaches the last of your vision >You feel... odd >Is this what death feels like? >It feels wet, like you're floating in water >It also feels like you're drowning >You open your eyes, expecting to see the formless void in front of you >You see water, it stings your eyes >You take a breath >Holy shit you're fucking drowning! >You flail wildly, searching for the surface >You spot glimmers of the sun's rays penetrate the surface >Channel your spirit Micheal Phelps and swim for that shit >You break water with all the majesty of a dying Magikarp >You somehow manage to find land >Sweet sweet land >You'd kiss the sandy bank if you weren't coughing water all over it >After a few empty retches, you can finally breathe again >Oh sweet supple Oxygen, thou art truly the master of all >Okay, you're alive, good >Now would be a practical time to pass ou-   -------------------------------------------------   >You slowly begin to come to >Nice, sandy beaches >Odd >You force your eyes open, seeing a cloudless sky above you >Where are you? >You swear if that Guy Fawkes faggot drugged and raped you you'll... >Wait >Car crash, shit >Did you get flung from your car? >You weren't anywhere near a beach >Come to think of it, your body should hurt a lot more than it does >You try to sit up >Success! >The fuck? >Where *are* you? >A small lake sits in front of you, doubtless this was the drowning sensation from earlier >Around the lake are rolling meadows and gentle hills >Can you stand? >You can stand >You have a look all around you >More green fields, you spy the tops of some thatched buildings over one of the hills >This shit is getting less cash as it goes on >You're far beyond confused now >Maybe you are dead >But then, how could you have felt drowning? >You can't die twice >Right? >Whatever, existential crisis later, explore now >You head for the thatched roofs (rooves?) >Not rooves, definitely not rooves >You crest the hill and get your first good look at the town >Don't pass out again... We good? We good. >Horses >Pastel horses >Bob Ross would be having an orgasm right now >As weird as this is, there might be people in the town >You head off on unsure feet >Some of the animals begin to take notice of you incoming and hot >You didn't know equines could make that sound >Screaming >Running >General mass panic >Whoever lived here trained their beasts poorly >Whatever, you continue your steady trek >The panic increases to compensate >The closer you get the more you notice about these horses >First and foremost, they're very small >Secondly, there are unicorns and pegasuses... pegasi... bird horses >Aw look, that one has a hat >And a rope >The rope is now around your midriff >"Git over here!" >Sweet flying monkey bollocks it talks! Like Scorpion apparently... >Aaaaand you're in the air >Shit that talking horse is strong >You manage to plant your feet, just, and tug back >The horse, not expecting this, jerks forward and off balance, pulling back hard to compensate >You jump forwards as it does, letting the horse pull on slack >Holy shit it almost did a backflip, awesome! >"Hang on AJ!" >Where did that come from? >You turn to it, only to get a face full of blue bird horse >Newton's Third Law is unerring... and painful >The pegasus is up as you're on all fours >It gets set to deliver a solid buck to your jaw >ohfuckno.net/shitshitshit "Don't!" >You blurt the word out autonomously >The pegasus stops itself and turns to face you warily, a number of others approaching as backup >You're getting quickly surrounded here >"You talk?" "Yes" >You uneasily answer the blue pegasus before you, your brain still catching up >"Are you from the Everfree?" >This time it was a purple Unicorn that asked you "Wherezzat?" >"So... Ya ain't a monster?" >Scorpion now joins the conversation "Umm... not to my knowledge" >You offer an uneasy smile >This is going really fucking badly   -------------------------------------------------   >"Is Anonymous the good guy, Grandpa?" "You'll find out soon enough, Precious, but alas, it is far past your bedtime" >"Aww, maybe just a bit more?" "Sorry, sweet pea, your father would have words with me" >"Will you come back tomorrow night, Grandpa?" "Of course I will, Precious, of course I will"