Anon and Chrysalis Ch23

The Marvellous Mishaps of Anon and Chrysalis

Chapter 23: For the Sake of a Broken Winged Lady

 

>It was a new day in the magical land of Equestria.

>The birds (the few that stayed during the winter) were singing. It was beautiful.

>Of course, you couldn’t actually know this. Your blinds are closed.

>Despite them being as dark as possible, the light still flooded in. Ugh...

>Squinting, you try to sit up in your bed. However, Chrysalis hanging off of you makes this impossible.

>You sigh. Last night, huh. Well, at least she’s happy.

>An angry mare is a force to behold. It was a wonder you even bothered antagonizing Applejack at all, knowing how much damage those kicks of hers could do.

>Slowly, you bring up a hand, prying the queen’s legs off of you.

>You take measures to avoid touching any of the sensitive holes that littered her frame. No need to wake her up quite yet.

>Within five minutes, you were free from the queen’s deathgrip. She hadn’t even awoken.

>Mentally patting yourself on the back, you get out of your bed and grab a robe.

>You’re definitely going to need a shower. The smell of... Chrysalis, you decide, still lingers on you.

>And since you need to tell Rainbow Dash about this and other things today, you figure it’d help if you didn’t smell just like her.

>Grabbing some new clothes, you exit the room.

>A quick trek leaves you inside the bathroom, giving you time to get all clean and shiny.

>Aah... Nice and warm. Just how you like it.

>Of course, you being Anonymous, you’re unable to finish your shower before being rudely interrupted.

 

>Damnit. Why didn’t you put the blanket back over her?

>Chrysalis grins at you, poking her head past the curtains to greet you. “Good morning...”

“Morning Chrys. Do you mind? Having a shower.”

>”I know. I was hoping I could join you.”

“...Honestly, I don’t think there’s room in here for both of us.”

>”You don’t know until you try...”

>You groan as the queen barges in on you, getting herself nice and wet.

“Why can’t you just wait until I’m done? Neither of us are going to get clean like this.”

>”Who said anything about getting clean? I’m here to get dirty... With your help, of course.”

“Sex in the shower, Chrysalis? Really?”

>”What? I thought you liked having sex with me,” She pouts.

“I’ve had sex with you a grand total of one time, which was last night. It’s not really something I want to do every ten minutes.”

>She rolls her eyes, inching closer, which inadvertently backs you up against the cold tile. That’s definitely not your fetish...

>She rubs a hoof on your upper thigh, teasing you. “Come on... I’ve never done it in the shower. It’ll be special.”

“Chrysalis, the only people who have sex in the shower act solely on impulse. And that’s not what I am.”

>”Then what are you, Anon?”

“Just a guy. A guy with a horny bug girlfriend.”

>She laughs. “That you are, Anon. That you are.”

 

>After managing to get yourself clean without any aquatic hijinks, you went downstairs.

>Derpy and Ditto were both up and about.

>Chrysalis, being infinitely generous, decided to make breakfast for you with Derpy.

>That left you with the commander of things that change.

>”So.”

“So.”

>”You are looking better.”

>You nod. Yeah, you felt better too. You’re definitely taking Fluttershy’s advice more often.

>Well, unless she wants you to have sex with her. That’s not gonna happen.

>”I’m still curious about that. What exactly did you do?”

“Meh. Fucked Chrysalis for a couple hours. What did you do last night?”

>He opens his mouth, but pauses. “...You had sex with Chrysalis last night?”

“Yes. What can I say? She digs me.”

>The officer smiles nervously. “Yes... I’m sure.”

“Is there something I should know, Ditto?”

>”You’ll find out soon enough. Anyway, uh, my night was fine. Nothing to report.”

>You shrug, turning back to the TV. You couldn’t care less what other absurd changeling customs might exist at the moment.

>You didn’t watch TV for long, as Chrysalis then trotted in, as bright as can be. “Food’s ready, Anon. Come, let’s eat.”

“Can’t you just bring it to me?”

 

>Her cheerful expression instantly deflates. “Anon, come eat your food.” She trots out.

>You had hoped she’d be more inclined to do things for you. Hrm. Cooking is clearly the limit of her generosity.

>The food was... okay. About on par with most things really.

>”How is it, Anon?”

“It’s about as good as last night.”

>Chrysalis seems about ready for an aneurysm. However, she quickly comes up with a counter.

>”Well, don’t worry Anon. I’ve got seconds of both.”

>And with that, she dumps the rest of the medium quality food onto your plate.

>Ditto frowns. “...I was going to have that...”

>You push your plate over to him. [spoiler][/spoiler]”I’m not hungry anyway. Go crazy.”

>Chrysalis is not amused. You smile at her suffering. She’s just gonna have to deal with it.

>Derpy shakes her head. “You’re a really weird couple.”

“Yeah, but I think that’s the point.”

>With breakfast out of the way, you return to your lovely armchair. Chrysalis, however, seems to have some plans of her own.

“You gonna sit down, Chrysalis?”

>”Move over. I’m sitting with you.”

“The only pony allowed to sit in this chair is Derpy.”

>”I’m your marefriend. I think I am qualified.”

 

>Derpy gives Chrysalis a scolding stare. “Anon said no, Chrysalis. You have a seat already, you don’t need two.”

>”But my seat is so far from Anonymous. Oh, here’s an idea Derpy... Let’s switch spots!”

“Chrysalis, if you want to tell me something you can. It’s not going to kill you if it’s from the couch.”

>She groans. “Damnit Anonymous, you’re starting to annoy me. Keep this up and you’ll be getting no loving from me tonight.”

>You shrug sarcastically. “I guess thems the breaks. Oh well.”

>Her angry glare fails to surpass your pokerface. She sighs, and sits down on the couch.

>”Well Anon, I believe since we’re done with all the silliness, that we should go out and celebrate our union. And I know just where to go, too.”

“Let me guess, because Ditto was out researching for you last night?”

>”Of course not. I am the changeling queen! I’ve had this planned for weeks!”

>You glance to Ditto, who shakes his head. Alright Chrys, if you say so.

“Well? Where to?”

>”I can’t tell you that, Anon! It’s a surprise!”

“A surprise.” Oh boy, just what you need. More rustling.

>There’s a moment of silence.

>”Aren’t you going to press further?”

“Nope. I am confident that whatever you have planned will be enjoyable. Maybe.”

>She smiles at you. “You won’t be disappointed...”

 

>Hours later, you were out on the town with your changeling queen.

>Because, well, you needed to tell Rainbow Dash a few important things.

>While you would prefer to just do this by yourself, Chrysalis wants to make sure you don’t wuss out.

>Ha! Like you’d ever back down from something like this. You are Anon! You give no fucks!

>Except that one time. And that other time in Vegas. But otherwise never.

>You mentally change the topic, not wanting to thinking back to... that one time. Yeah...

>So, instead, you go over how to you will break the news to your little Dashie.

>Despite appearing all brash and tough on the outside, you knew how fragile she could be. You’d be treading on thin ice with this.

>Hopefully you won’t sink.

>After chatting up Twilight on the streets, you found out Dash was in a pub not too far away.

>”So, Anon, are you ready to put an end to this?”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

>”Mhm, you’d better. If not, I’ll just do it for you.”

“Chrysalis, give me a break. This is harder than it looks.”

>She rolls her eyes, giving no other response to you.

>You sigh, looking around for the rainbow mare. Ooh, there she is.

>She turns to you as you approach. Smiling, she waves. You weakly wave back. Here goes...

“Hi Rainbow... Uh... What’s up?”

>”Oh, nothing much. Hold on a second, I want you to meet somep0ny.”

 

>She jumps down from her stool, trotting away. You turn to Chrysalis, showing off your puzzle face. She shrugs.

>In short order, Dash is back, with another mare.

>Like Rarity, she has a white coat, but the similarities end there. The pony’s mane is blue, with two distinct shades striped through it.

>She also had some pretty cool shades on, though on her forehead, letting you get a look at her eyes, which were almost identical to Rainbow’s in their colour.

>”Anon, this is Vinyl. She’s the DJ at the new nightclub downtown. You know, Club SEAL?”

>Club SEAL? Who came up with that shit?

“Ah... Right. Nice to meet you, Vinyl.”

>She smiles, “You too, pal. Rainbow’s told me all about you. And this is Chrysalis, right?”

>The queen, turns away from her. “You will address me as Queen Chrysalis, thank you very much.”

>Vinyl frowns, turning to you. “Why do you hang with this bitch again?”

“Story of my life.”

>Chrysalis glares at all of you as you laugh about her abrasive personality.

>Rainbow recovers first from her laughing fit. “So, anyway, what’s up?”

>Oh. Right. Uhhh...

>The DJ cuts you off. “I know what’s up! He wants to party. Well, good thing we’re doing a show tonight, huh? Can I count on you to be there, Anon?”

>Chrysalis rolls her eyes. “Yes, he’ll be there, because we were already going.”

 

>Vinyl nods. “Yeah, cool, cool. Maybe we can do something about that stick up your ass, eh Queen? Anyway Dash, I’ve gotta jet. See you later!”

>”Seeya Vinyl!”

>And with that, the other partymare was gone. Chrysalis nudges you after a short reprieve.

>”So, Anon, didn’t you want to tell Rainbow something?”

“Uh... Yes. Um... Well...”

>Rainbow raises an eyebrow at you. “Oh? What’s up Anon?”

>You really want to tell her. Honestly, you do. But through the will of some extra-planetary force, you cannot. As though some creature from outside your perceived reality is stealing all your words before you can say them.

>And thus, you tell Rainbow Dash this important fact:

“I think your hair would look better if it was in a ponytail.”

>You freeze up. What the fuck was that? Come on Anon, step it up.

>Chrysalis gives you her best ‘what the fuck man’ look. You can smell the disappointment on her.

>Rainbow’s reaction is different one. Instead of mirroring Chrysalis, she blushes at you. “A pony tail? Uh... well, I guess I could try that...”

“N-No, it’s fine. Anyway, see you at the party! Chrys and I need to... stuff. Yes.”

>You convert the rustle energy into pure strength, managing to push Chrysalis all the way out of the pub, her hooves dragging across the ground the entire way.

>She shakes her head. “I’m sleeping with a baby. Good choice, Chrysie...”

 

“I’ll tell her at the party.”

>”You’d better. I’m not delaying this another day.”

“Right. I’ll fix this, I promise.”

>She smiles playfully. “Yes, well I’m still upset. You will have to make this up to me later.”

“...Want some egg sandwiches?”

>”I was thinking something a bit more... ‘hands’ on.”

>She giggles evilly as she trots off, wiggling her behind at you seductively.

>Way to go Anon. You can really pick ‘em!

-

>That night, Chrysalis led you around, leading you to the new nightclub.

>You were still a bit miffed that they’d choose such a stupid name, but you’re in no position to change it.

>Arriving, you take a moment to examine the large building.

>From the looks of it, the building was a renovated warehouse.

>You cross your arms, mildly impressed. The number of ponies lined up alone proved that this was a worthy venture for its owner. They’d have lodes of mone in no time at all.

>Of course, there was that line up to deal with. And thus, in the line you go.

>Chrysalis groans, not big on the wait. “Can’t we just cut ahead? We are VIPs.”

“VIPs? Chrysalis, let’s not be silly.”

>”But it’s true! I’m a queen, and you’re one of a kind!”

“Does that mean Discord is automatically a VIP too for being unique?”

 

>She glares at you. “You know what I mean.”

>Soon enough, you made your way to the front. The bouncer, a big, grey stallion, looks at you, inspecting every detail.

>”Well? Can we go in now?”

>The bouncer simply nods before gazing off.

>The club itself was fairly simple. At the far end was a large DJ station. From the looks of it, Vinyl is already busy at work. You’d say hi later.

>In front of her command center was the dance floor, which took up most of the building. Ponies of all shapes, sizes, and colours danced the night away.

>On one side of the room was a makeshift bar. Somehow you doubt you’ll be able to keep Chrysalis away from there...

>Various seats and tables littered the rest of the building, with what were probably bathrooms across from the bar. Now, to find-

>”Hey Anon! Glad you could make it!”

>Despite the noise, there was no mistaking that voice. You turn, looking upwards at the rainbow mare herself.

“Hey Rainbow!”

>She lands in front of you, grinning ear to ear. “So, let’s have some fun? Come on!”

>Before you say a word in objection, she’s dragging you off to the dance floor. This should be good.

“Rainbow, you know I can’t dance...”

 

>Chrysalis quickly follows the two of you to the dance floor. “Oh really? Ha! This should be fun to watch.”

>And so began the downward cycle of humiliation. Despite your best efforts, your moves were thoroughly whack. Damnit Rainbow...

>”Come on Anon, loosen up!” You give her your ‘why’ face, but still attempt to relax a bit.

>Chrysalis laughing her ass off from the sidelines didn’t make it all that easy.

>Eventually, you managed to escape Rainbow’s dancing 101 course, making your way to the bar with Chrysalis, Rainbow trailing right behind.

>”I have to say Anon, your moves are...” A pause. “...Hilariously bad.”

“Yeah, whatever. I don’t dance.”

>”Clearly not. Don’t worry, I’ll get you a trainer before next time. I can’t have you soiling my image.”

“Shut up Chrysalis.”

>Reaching the bar, you take a seat on a nearby stool. Rainbow Dash swoops in, stealing the seat on your left, wedging herself between you and your queen.

>Right now, you were grateful. Chrysalis would never let that incident drop. Never.

>Rainbow turns to you, grinning. “Nice music, right? Vinyl’s the best DJ around!”

“Sorry, I can’t hear you over my scotch on the rocks.”

>Sadly, you didn’t actually have scotch. Just a beer. Regardless, you gulp some down.

>The others all end up with more or less the same drink as you. You know, really crappy beer.

 

>And so the night goes by, bit by bit. Eventually you moved on to a booth in the corner, but the conversations... well, you weren’t really paying attention anyway.

>”And that’s how I saved the Wonderbolts!”

>Chrysalis rolls her eyes, swaying heavily in her seat. “Shut up Rainbow, that never happened...”

“It did, I was there.”

>”Shut up Anonymous, that never happened!”

>Rainbow just laughs to herself. You smile, happy to see your friends happy.

>That’s when you get jabbed in the kidneys. Ow. You give Chrysalis an angry glare. Whatever buzz you had going pretty much dissipated right there.

“What?”

>”Go tell her you idiot!”

“Tell her? Right in the middle of this crowd? Real smart, Chrys.”

>”Tell me what?”

>Chrysalis opens her mouth to spill the beans. You stupidly try to shut her up with a hand.

>Which she then bites. Oh god, does that hurt.

>She blinks in shock, looking at your injured appendage. Examining your fingers you can see that, while no serious damage has occurred, you’re still bleeding a bit.

>”Ah! Anon, s-sorry! Sorry, sorry sorry!”

“It’s fine! It’s fine! I’ll just go... clean this up.”

>Rainbow jumps up into flight. “I’ll help you out with that.” She shoots Chrysalis a furious glare.

 

>Chrysalis smiles sheepishly, shrinking in her seat.

>Being led by Rainbow, you quickly make it to the bathrooms. Being in so much pain, you don’t even comment about how you’re in the mares room.

>Again.

>Reaching the sink, you do your best to clean up your mangled digits. The soap burns, but that just means it’s working.

>”Real piece of work, isn’t she? Can you believe she just chomped on your hands?”

“She’s drunk, and in her defence, I shouldn’t have had my hands in there anyway.”

>She rolls her eyes as you bandage up with some toilet paper. You had to do numerous layers to make sure it held.

>”But, what were you trying to hide anyway? She find your porn stash or something?”

“I don’t have a porn stash, Rainbow.”

>”Come on Anon, we all have one. Even you.”

>Yeah, sure thing Rainbow. You know damn well that there’s no pornographic pony pictures anywhere in your house.

>Okay, well that’s not true. You know Ditto has a number of them in his room, but /you/ don’t, and that’s the point.

>Rainbow ponders, “Heh, let’s see... What else could you be hiding?”

“Rainbow...”

>It’s now or never Anon. Plus, she’s been drinking as much as Chrysalis. While she can handle her booze, even you know she’s a bit hammered right now. You have to use this to your favour.

 

“Look, Rainbow, it’s about last night. You know how I... grabbed Chrysalis and disappeared?”

>She blinks. “Oh. Yeah. That. What was that all about anyway? You left us hanging for like an hour.”

>You take a deep breath.

“Well, we were upstairs having sex.”

>You cringe. Welp, you said it. Now here comes the shitstorm...

>The mare just stares at you in silence, mouth closed. You’re not sure what she’s thinking, but it’s definitely not good.

>You take a few steps toward her. [spoiler][/spoiler]”Look, Rainbow, I know you-“

>”You promised I’d be first, Anon.”

>You freeze in place. Like a newborn flame, her anger is growing.

>If you don’t calm her down, your hand is the last thing you’ll be worrying about.

“...I, uh, wasn’t thinking straight. That drug Luna gave me, remember?”

>She narrows her eyes. “You still broke your promise. That’s not fucking cool.”

>You sigh, looking down at the ground.

>She slowly steps toward you, watching you closely.

“Uh... Rainbow? Look, I should probably tell you-“

>”Not really interested. You broke your promise.” She hiccups. Blushing, she covers her mouth.

>She shakes her head, then grins at you. “So you’ve got to make it up to me.”

“...Are you implying what I think you are?”

>”You’re obviously okay with ponies, especially if you went for Chrysalis of all mares first. Come on, we’re alone...”

 

“Rainbow, this is a public bathroom, I’m not interested, and you’re drunk. How about you let me finish what I was saying?”

>She giggles. “You don’t have to worry about me not letting you finish Anon...”

>You back away from her. Fucking drunken mares. Why can’t they just take a no and drop it?

“Rainbow, seriously, cut this shit out. There’s more.”

>She’s backed you into a corner, hovering in front of you. Your reluctance is obviously making things worse.

>”What, Anon? What can you possibly say that can’t wait? What? Do you love Chrysalis or some shit like that? Give me a break Anon. Let me have my fun... For once?”

>You look away from her, your silence telling her the truth for you.

>Her eyes widen in shock as she flaps away, landing in front of you.

“Rainbow... I’m sorry. Seriously, but... it’s just how things are.”

>She remains silent, looking away from you.

“Rainbow?”

>You take a step closer. She takes a few back.

“Come on Rainbow, we’re still friends... right? I know you’re mad about this, but I’m sure we can look back on this later and laugh. Come on, I’ll get you another drink.”

>”No.” She points to the door. “This is the mare’s room. No stallions allowed. Get out.”

“...I’ll let you cool off. We’ll talk later. Okay?”

>You get no response from her.

 

>Some time later, you were back in your home, as miserable as can be.

>You hadn’t even bothered taking your armchair back, letting Derpy keep it while you sat beside Chrysalis on your fancy couch.

>The mare was all up in your business, trying to cheer you up. It wasn’t really working.

>”Come on Anonymous, give me a smile.” She nuzzles your neck softly. You grunt in annoyance.

>She sighs. “Anon, Rainbow will be fine, you’ll see. Just think about something else. Like me. Your marefriend. Remember me?”

“Yes, Chrysalis, I remember you.”

>”Good. Now whenever you think of Rainbow, make yourself think of this.”

>You turn to her, seeing her smiling brightly, pointing a hoof at her face.

>She didn’t seem to realize she was telling you to remember that it’s her fault Rainbow is mad at you. You didn’t care enough to tell her either.

>You sigh once more, gazing toward your lovely television. As usual, nothing was on.

“I still need to talk to her, Chrys...”

>Derpy nods. “Yes, and you will! But tomorrow. Don’t worry, everything will be fine!”

>You weren’t so sure, though. Even if you did patch things up with Rainbow, it would never be the same.

“Right.”

>The target of your affections gives you a hug. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you with Rainbow.”

“Personally, I’d rather you not.”

>”Too bad, Anonymous. I’ve already decided. Now, in the meantime, why don’t we have some fun?”

 

“...What sort of fun?”

>You look at her sceptically. You don’t like what those bedroom eyes are implying.

>”Well, we never did play in the shower. Why don’t we try that out now?”

“How about we don’t, and pretend we did?”

>She frowns at you, letting up just barely. You glance over to your companions. Both of them smile nervously at you.

“You two can pretend we did too, if you want. I won’t stop you.”

>Derpy shakes her head. “But Anon, there’s not enough room in there for both of you.”

“Story of my life...”

-

>You didn’t sleep well that night.

>Chrysalis had insisted she stay with you that night, ignoring your complaints.

>At least she didn’t try to have sex with you. Finally, she was understanding your feelings.

>Or perhaps it was her tasting the negativity that you’re exuding.

>Either way, she was content to just cuddle with you for the night, though understandably, you were reluctant to return the favour.

>And so you sat, trying to sleep. Erratic would best describe your night, with you waking up numerous times at random.

>Finally though, after much difficulty, you found yourself asleep at last.

>What awaits you tomorrow? No one knows.

 

>You awoke early the next day. You quickly got out of bed, got dressed and went about with your routine.

>Chrysalis tried to cheer you up again, but failed.

>Now, eating some breakfast, she continues her assault.

>”Anonymous, come on. We can’t just rush over to her home first thing. You need to relax.”

“The longer we wait, the less receptive she’ll be. We have to go now.”

>Derpy shakes her head, agreeing with the queen for once. “I think you need to let her cool down, Anon. You’ll just make it worse if you go too soon.”

>”Finally! Somep0ny who agrees with me.”

>Derpy turns to her. “You can’t go though.  If you’re there, bad things will happen!”

>Chrysalis glares at Derpy. “Bad things? Like what?”

“I can think of a few things...”

>”Well that's all fine and dandy, Anon, but you still aren’t going anywhere. Not like this.”

“And why is that? Do you doubt my abilities?”

>They both nod. “Yes.”

>Well fuck you too. The duo drags you over to your living room, where Ditto is sitting about.

>Chrysalis takes her seat. “You need to relax. To calm down. You’re all antsy right now.”

>Derpy, from your seat, nods. “Yeah. If you’re really nervous, then when you talk to Rainbow you might say something bad.”

>Chrysalis continues. “So, while we let Rainbow cool off for the day, we’re going to find a way for you to chill out, so you’ll be ready to see her later. Sound good to you?”

 

>While you’d still prefer just going to her now, you agree to their terms.

>Chrysalis grins. “Good choice. Now, Ditto, get me... it.”

>He turns to her, sceptical. “It? Are you sure that will be necessary?”

>Derpy frowns at Chrysalis. “Aren’t we trying to get Anon to relax? How will that help him at all?”

>”It’ll get his mind off the issue.” She turns to her commander. “Why are you still here? Go!”

>And with that, he was gone. You cross your arms, looking at the mares, inspecting their posture for any  hints of what’s to come. There’s none.

“I am clearly out of the loop. What is ‘it?’”

>Chrysalis magically tugs you over to her. “You’ll see. Sit. Relax.”

>She pulls you down to her, pulling you into a hug. You smile awkwardly as she releases you.

>Soon enough, Ditto returns with a thick envelope. It’s well sealed; you have no idea what lies within it.

>This worries you somewhat. How exactly will this distract you from Rainbow Dash?

>Ditto magically passes ‘it’ to you. You hold it in your hands, inspecting the package carefully.

>Chrysalis looms over you, grinning. “Go on. Open it.”

>You glance to Derpy, who, while blushing, nods. You activate all your rustle defences, take a deep breath, and then open the envelope.

>Inside are a number of large photos. Dozens and dozens of photos.

>But not just any photos. Photos of Chrysalis. Sometimes as her human self. Sometimes as a changeling.

>All of them shared one thing though. They weren’t safe for work.

 

>Feeling your soldier rising to attention, you hurriedly store the photos back into their home. Why would Chrysalis give you-Oh.

>Yes. That made sense, actually. She had rustled you to protect you.

>Well played, Chrysalis. You turn to her, catching her seductive smile. Your eyes trace hers to your crotch. You hold your hands up in defeat.

“Alright, you got me. Well done.”

>She laughs. “You seem to be having some trouble with your pants. Why don’t I give you some help?”

“Chrysalis, are you for real or what? When did you even find the time to make all of this stuff?”

>She briefly glances to Ditto. “I’ve had some help. But anyway, why don’t you get those jeans off...”

“How about no?”

>Derpy sighs, holding a hoof to her forehead. “Chrysalis, are you always this public about your sex life?”

>She nods. “Oh yes. Of course. Aren’t you?”

>The mare looks off in two directions, blushing furiously. Clearly not.

>Chrysalis pokes at you. You slowly grab the offending hoof, pushing it away.

“Hey, I don’t poke your sensitive areas. Can’t you not poke mine?”

>She laughs. “Oh, Anon, you’re hilarious. Come, let’s go have some fun upstairs. Derpy clearly isn’t big on watching.”

>Ditto, who had returned to his usual seat turns to you. “You may as well, Anon. She won’t let up until you do.”

“Nah, I’ll pass. She’s no good anyway.”

>All of you, bar the queen herself, laugh at this. Her? She just fumes angrily.

>Score one for humanity.

 

>Hours later, your various friends had managed to cheer you up a little bit.

>While you still felt awful about Rainbow Dash, you were able to avoid dwelling on it too much.

>After all, you can’t cheer someone up if you’re not also happy.

>Throwing on your jacket, you turn to the ponies with which you shared a home.

>Chrysalis remains quiet, a rarity to behold. She simply nods at you as you prepare.

>Derpy smiles at you. “Good luck Anon!”

“Thanks Derpy, I’ll probably need it.”

>She continues to smile as you turn to Ditto. Like his queen, he nods at you.

“Well, see you guys later. Hopefully I’ll be with Rainbow. We’ll see.”

>They nod, and you make your way off. However, Chrysalis cuts you off, pulling you over for a second.

“Hm? What’s up?”

>”Anon, I know Rainbow is important to you... So, don’t worry about what I might think of... what you’ll probably have to do with her to pacify her.”

“...I’m not going to have sex with Rainbow Dash, if that’s what you’re saying.”

>She rolls her eyes. “Just don’t make it a regular thing, alright? You’re my coltfriend, not hers.”

>You give her a confused look. She sighs, leaning forward, kissing you.

>After a second of thinking, you return the gesture, leaning in.

>It doesn’t progress much further though, with the queen pulling off of you in short order. “Save it for tonight. Now go.”

>You don’t need to be told twice, and make your way outside. Now, where could Rainbow Dash be...?

 

>Heading off, you check numerous locations where Rainbow regulared.

>First, you went over to Sugarcube Corner, thinking she might be drowning her sorrows in sweets.

>Sadly, she wasn’t, though thinking ahead, you picked up a box of donuts to give to her. Every lady likes chocolate after all.

>Moving on, it occurs to you that Rainbow Dash might be literally drowning her sorrows, and so you check the various pubs and bars where she could easily do so.

>By the fourth one, you’ve made effectively no progress. Sighing, you get a drink for yourself.

>Nothing fancy or heavy, of course. It would be in your best interest to not find Rainbow Dash while drunk.

>”Hey, Anon right?”

>You blink, turning to the voice. Hey, it’s that DJ form before. Vinyl wasn’t it?

“Oh, hey... Vinyl right?”

>She nods. “Yeah that’s me. Nice to see you’ve remembered. Anyway, uh, could you tell me something?”

“Sure, why not?”

>You stretch out your neck a bit, before focusing on the mare. She seems actually quite worried.

>”Well, I found Dash last night sitting in the bathroom... You know, at the club. She wouldn’t tell me what was wrong, but she looked awful. Any idea what’s up?”

>Yeah, you know alright. However, considering Vinyl is probably your best lead to Rainbow right now, you figure keeping her in the dark a bit would be the best thing to do.

 

“It’s a bit personal; do you know where she’s at? I’ve been trying to find her.”

>”Rainbow? Huh...” She thinks for a bit. “Well, she was going to hang out here for awhile, but never showed up. Couldn’t tell you, honestly.”

>Damn. There goes that lead.

“Well, thanks. Anyway, I should keep looking.”

>”Alright, you do that. Let me know if you need any help; Rainbow’s my friend too. I don’t like seeing her all down, you know?”

>You nod, leaving the building to continue your search.

>Minutes passed, but there was still no sign of the rainbow mare.

>Growing more and more desperate as time progressed, you asked various ponies if they had seen her.

>While you got a few leads, they generally lead you to dead ends, wasting more precious sunlight.

>You had even risked asking Applejack if she knew where she was.

>The country pony raises an eyebrow at you. “Rainbow huh? Well, Ah know exactly where she’s at.”

“...Seriously? Where?”

>”Now wait just a second there partner. Ah never said Ah was gonna tell ya. Ya have to do somethin’ for me first.” You glare at her.

“Applejack, don’t try your luck. Where is Rainbow Dash?”

>She looks about cautiously, eventually focusing on an alleyway. “If ya just come on in here with me for a second, Ah’d be glad to tell you.”

“But Applejack, I thought exhibitionism was your fetish. Yeah, you can go rape someone else. Bye.”

 

>She glares at you. “Fine, ya dolt. She’s at the lake. Now, let’s go have some fun?”

>You pull out your nonexistent schedule, checking it. [spoiler][/spoiler]”Sorry Applejack, my schedule’s full for today. How about I pencil you in for the first Tuesday of 2014?”

>She blinks. “Uh... Okay?”

“Great. See you then.”

>You quickly head away, half expecting Applejack to have just been bullshitting you, as usual.

>She doesn’t persist, instead, trotting off in the opposite direction, somewhat happy. She stops.

>”Now wait a second, 2014? That’s in over a thousand years! Damnit Anon...”

>Unfortunately for Applejack, you were already gone, en route to the lake.

>You searched high. You searched low. But around the shores, Rainbow Dash didn’t show.

>Clearly you’ve been had. Again.

>Groaning, you take a seat under the tree you and Chrysalis often shared with each other. Losing hope, you put down the box of donuts.

“Man, where is she?”

>”Where’s who, Anon?”

>You blink, looking up into the tree, spotting, yep you guessed it, Rainbow Dash lying on a branch.

“Ah! Rainbow! Hey...”

>”What do you want, Anon?”

>She slowly slides of the branch, landing and sitting some distance away from you.

>The signs of sleep deprivation are clear. She hasn’t had any sleep at all.

“Well... I just want to talk. About things. You know, us?”

>”Fine. I’m listening.”

 

>You stand up, approaching her. Once again, her face is expressionless. You sigh.

“I’m really sorry about going back on my word, Rainbow. Truly. It just... happened. I know that doesn’t make it up to you, but well, I don’t want to stop being friends over this...”

>She looks away from you, silent.

>You kneel down to her level. [spoiler][/spoiler]”Rainbow? Are we still friends?”

>”Why should we be? I gave you everything I had, and you just tossed it aside.”

>You pause. This isn’t going well...

>She turns to you, beginning to tear up. “You never loved me at all, did you? Not even once?”

“...Rainbow, look...”

>”You didn’t! I knew it!” She takes flight, getting in your face. “Yet you just let me get attached. You don’t even care!”

“Rainbow, I do care! Why the fuck would I be here if I didn’t care?”

>”I don’t know, Anon. Maybe you like watching me suffer? Hey! There’s that fetish Fluttershy’s been trying to find.”

“That’s not cool, Rainbow.”

>”Well it’s true.”

>She lands, facing away from you.

“Rainbow...”

>There’s no response. Nothing at all.

“Come on, Rainbow...”

 

>Still no response from the mare.

“Rainbow, please... What do you want from me, Rainbow? Come on... anything.”

>”You can’t give me what I want.”

“...Are you sure?”

>She slowly turns to you. “You don’t love me. That’s all I want.”

>There’s a pause, as you try to come up with a response. Hm, that could work...

“Rainbow, I do love you. Just... differently.”

>”Differently?”

“Yeah... Um, well, it’s complicated. It’s just Chrysalis I love as, a marefriend.”

>She nods. Alright Anon, here goes nothing.

“But you, I love as well, my best friend. It’s different, you know? I care a lot about you Rainbow; I don’t want to lose you over all of this...”

>She looks away again. “...I don’t know if... I really like that.”

>You sigh, heading back to the tree, and lie against it. Well, Anon, you tried.

“Well, Rainbow, thanks for letting me try. Maybe I’ll see you around?”

>You glance to her, but she’s gone. What the...

>A pressure on your chest alerts you to her presence. She’s right on top of you, looking you in your eyes.

>”You love me as your best friend, huh? Well, I guess that will have to do.”

“Heh... So you’re okay... with Chrysalis and I?”

>”Are you happy with her?”

 

“...Yes. Sure, she’s annoying as hell, but, yes, I’m happy.”

>”Then that’s good enough for me. However...”

“However?”

>”You still broke your promise. That’s going to cost you some serious bro points, Anon. So...”

“...So?”

>She leans closer, pretty much lying on top of you. “Well, you’ll see...”

>Indeed, you did see. You saw many things. Things man was not meant to see. Oh well.

-

>An hour later, you were back at your lovely home.

>Walking in, thouroughly tired, your companions all rushed to see you.

>Derpy makes it to you first, bowling you over with a friendly hug. “Welcome back, Anon!”

“Hi Derpy...”

>You run a hand through her mane, enticing an adorable giggle out of her.

>Chrysalis and Ditto are close behind, both smiling at you. Ditto speaks. “Things went well, then?”

“...Yes. They did.”

>You stand up, facing Chrysalis. “Really now?”

“Yes, really. I was able to solve everything in ten seconds flat.”

>Chrysalis narrows her eyes at you. “Is that a fact? Hrm. Congratulations?”

“...Now if you’ll excuse me, I need another shower. Nice and... cold.”

>You shudder, pushing past the ponies before you. Never again. Never ever. Ever.