Title:           Helping a Fluffy Family
Author:          Ginger_Fig
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/vrmzKJNR
First Edit:      Saturday 25th of August 2012 01:21:14 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 25th of August 2012 01:21:14 PM CDT

>You have a lousy job.
>Bussing tables at the Chinese Buffett.
>You're not even Chinese.
>You leave work last, after mopping the floor.
>11pm, no car so you walk home.
>On the way you hear a pathetic voice.
>"Pwease Mista hewp fwuffies?"
>It's a dirty white unicorn stallion.
>With him are four mares...two pregnant.
>At least 12 foals of varying ages.
>They're all crying, skinny & shivering.
>"Fwuffy daddee wuv mummas...wuv babees, nu can find e'nuff nummies."
>Littlest foals cry "Fwuffy hungwy!"
>Mommas and bigger foals try to comfort them.
>Stallion looks up at you with pleading eyes.
>"Hooman pwease hewp...pwease nummies fow babees."
"You got too many kids, dumbass."
>"Wha? Fwuffy wuv babees! Mowe babees coming...fwuffy happy!"
"Here dumbass, I'll help you."
>All the fluffies cheer. "Yay!" "Mista hewp!" "New hooman daddee!"
>Pick the stallion up.
>Part his grungy ass fluff.
>"Whaaa!? Why touch pee-pee?"
>Cut off his balls with your pocket knife.
>"AAAAGGGGHHHRRR! Huwt fwuffy! Why huwt fwuffy?"
>Set him down, the distressed mares leave their foals to help him.
>Collect all twelve foals.
>Check their gender...they squeal for their mothers.
>7 fillies go free.
>5 colts get the same as their father got.
>Six little fluffy nutsacks laying on the wet pavement.
"See, now you won't have more babies...you might be able to feed your family now."
>Male fluffies just writhe around crying and clutching their bloody scrotum stumps.
>Selfish animals didn't even thank you.
>That's the last time you do something nice for fluffy ponies.