Title:           Backpacker meets fluffy ponies
Author:          Ginger_Fig
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/Agst7hsD
First Edit:      Saturday 14th of July 2012 09:30:16 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 14th of July 2012 09:30:16 PM CDT

1/5
>You've been backpacking in the National Park for a few weeks.
>All alone in the wilderness.
>Sometimes you come down into town.
>Grab a beer and a shower...catch up on the news.
>Next morning it's back up into the woods.
 
>Hiking into a valley one day.
>A 2-lane highway cuts through this part of the park.
>Traffic is pretty busy.
>See a pitiable sight.
>A fluffy pony is caught in the middle of the road.
>She has two foals, about half-grown.
>She cowers under the center guardrail as cars zip past.
>Sometimes she tries to cross.
>There's never enough of a gap between cars.
>Her foals aren't fast enough to make it.
>They're too big to carry on her back.
>Fluffy mare knows the peril she & her foals are in.
>She's crying in fear.
>Her terrified foals cling to her fluff.
>You see an opportunity.
>You stand much higher than a fluffy pony.
>You can see the gaps in traffic coming.
>A safe gap opens.
>Walk out into the highway.
>Gather up all three fluffies in your arms.
>Carry them safely across the road.
 
2/5
>Grateful fluffy mare is sobbing with joy.          
>"Mista hewp fwuffy! Mista nice! Fank mista!"
>She & her foals hug your legs in gratitude.
>Hike back up into the forest.
>Fluffy ponies struggle to follow.
>You slow down and let them catch up often.
>Pour out a pan of water from your canteen.
>Thirsty foals drink it down eargerly.
>Pour out a second pan for the appreciative momma fluff.
>You don't cover much ground today.
 
>You reach a grassy clearing.
>It's late afternoon.
>Every hiker knows; don't wait too late to set up camp.
>You're familiar with this spot.
>Flat ground, few rocks...clear drinkable stream nearby.
>Good place to spend the night.
>Pitch your tent first.
>Fluffy ponies are fascinated.
>"Whaa? Majik houff!"
>They try to run inside.
"Oh no you don't!"
>Zip the flap shut...you don't need any "accidents" in your tent.
>Gather firewood.
>Fluffy foals play in the field.
>Fluffy mare eats tender grass & flowers.
 
3/5
>It's getting dark.
>Fluffy ponies return to you for safety.
>Momma is already sniffing around your food bag.
"Stay out of there...that's human food."
>Fluffy mare does not argue.
>"Fwuffy eat gwassies...nu steaw nice Mista nummies."
>You build your fire for the night.
>Light it with a cigarette lighter.
>Yeah; no silly rubbing two sticks together for you.
>Fluffy mare is scared of the flames.
"Easy girl...don't be afraid."
>Pat on your lap, invite her to sit with you.
>Grinning happily, fluffy curls up in your lap.
>"Fwuffy wuv Mista! Mista hewp fwuffy...find safe pwace. Pwease Mista new daddee?"
>Smile...scratch fluffy behind the ears.
>Grip her by the scruff of the neck.
>Grab her left back leg...twist sharply.
>It snaps; fluffy squeals in pain & shock.
>"OWWWIIEEE! Daddee pwease stawp! Huwt fwuffy!"
>Calmly break right front leg.
>That'll be enough...now fluffy can't run away.
>"Weggies huwt! Why daddee huwt? Pwease hewp fwuffy!"
>Shove the mare off your lap.
>Her foals rush to give her huggies.
>"Why Mista huwt mumma?" the cry "Mista nice...why gif owwies?"
>The terrified foals won't leave their mother.
>You've got them all now.
 
4/5
>Pick out the plump yellow foal.    
>It squeals in fear and tries to hang onto its mother.
>"Whhaaa! Wan' mummy! Nu huwt fwuffy!"
>The mare is crying...she can't hold onto her baby.
>"Pwease nu take babbee! Nu gif babbee owwies!"
>Pull out your trusty fillet knife.
>Momma cries in horror.
>"NUUU! Pwease nu eat babbee! Fwuffy nu nummies! Fwuffy wuv daddee!"
>Thwack her on the nose.
"Quiet, you."
>One slit up the squirming foal's belly fluff.
>It shrieks in agony and thrashes in your hand.
>It's struggles are feeble.
>Peel its skin off carefully.
>It comes off in one piece.
>Toss skin over by a tree.
>Fluff remains on face and hooves only.
>Skinned foal pants and squeals in agony.
>Shove a sharpened stick up fluffy foal butthole.
>Set foal up over the fire.
>It squirms on the stick for a little while, but soon roasts alive.
>You boil up some rice & dried vegetables to go with him.
>He's done.
>The meat is a little like pork...but slightly sweet.
>You finish him quickly, decide to have another.
>The bawling green filly is next.
>Momma tries to hold onto her terrified foal.
>No contest...you pull her away easily.
>Foal screams and cries as you pick up the knife.
>"WHHHAAAHH! Nu wan' owwiiees! Mummy save fwuffy!"
>Momma is helpless.
>She bawls and tries to drag herself on broken legs.
 
5/5
>Skin, impale & roast second foal.
>Eat this one slower.
>Momma watches in horror, tears soaking her face fluff.
>"B-b-babbees..."
>Jokingly, you offer her a piece.
>Of course fluffies are vegetarian, they won't eat meat.
>It's dark now...time for some sleep.
>You'll cook your last fluffy pony tomorrow.
>Obviously you don't want her in your tent.
>Can't leave her out here.
>A coyote, fox or bobcat will come steal your breakfast.
>You have some line.
>Tie up her tail.
>Hang her from a tree.
>"Whhhaaa! Owwiee! Owwiee! Huwt tail!"
>She flails her two good legs in agony.
>Then she sees her two foal's skins beneath her.
>"Baaabbbbeeees!" she wails, "Why babees died?"
>You gotta shut her up or you won't get any sleep.
>Your pocket-knife has a corkscrew.
>That'll work.
>Screw through fluffy muzzle, down into lower jaw.
>Fluffy squeals in torment, but it works.
>Mare's jaws are screwed shut.
>Now all she can make are muffled cries.
>You can ignore those.
>Snuff the fire out.
>Climb into your pup tent.
>Drift off to sleep.
>Another great day out in nature.