Title:           Fuckin AiE
Author:          GhostKid
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/YkKNbxN1
First Edit:      Wednesday 4th of July 2012 10:51:52 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Wednesday 4th of July 2012 10:51:52 AM CDT

>Day 1221 in Equestria.
>Wake up in morning.
"Hmm...I wonder if there's anything new to read.
>"What's that you're on, Anon?"
"Oh, just 4chan. I'm so glad this p0nynet is connected to my home dimension."
>"Hey, is that my name?"
>You keep reading and sure enough, Twilight's name is in one of the stories.
>And another.
>And another-OH GOD WHY.
>"I-is that me, b-being raped as a little filly...by YOU?"
>Godommot Bronhorn.
"Uh...I think...so..."
>She slaps you and leaves your house.
 
Fucking AiE
 
Day 1240 in Equestria.
>On com with RD.
>"Hey, let's read more of that Leucine guy!"
"Uh..are you sure you want to...you know...he's a romance writer."
>"Pff, yeah I'm sure. It's just interesting."
>Opens sake of a lady.
>...
>You don't see Rainbow Dash for a week but hear her crying when you pass by.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1248 in Equestria.
>Reading AiE as per usual.
>The ponies may get upset every once in a while, but on a whole they've come to understand that a lot of them are shipped together with you or each other.
>It doesn't phase them anymore.
>"Dear, is that...Sweetie Belle?"
"Hey, you're right, let's give it a read."
>...
>"I...I don't get it...so Sweetie Belle died and you rebuilt her as an android?"
"I thought maybe she was just an augmented p0ny...but that makes more sense..."
>"Oh, this is going to drive me up a wall, I just know it!"
"Hah, well it's better than the one where Sweetie became a vampire and Blueblood tried to kill you her and Celestia."
>"..."
"O-or the time where she was reforged with magic after carousel boutique burned down..."
>"..."
>You had to sleep with Rarity in the same room, frozen in fear at the computer.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1253 in Equestria.
>You're starting to think browsing this site may be bad for your health.
>"Haha, look at this sugarcube, this here thang thinks ah'd try ta rape ya lahk this!"
"Haha yeah, I know, it's all like a great big jo-"
>"Yeah, ah mean, if ah were to try an rape ya, ah'd just bop ya from behind first. Use th ropes ta lock ya in a position and just rut ya while ya slept. Ah don think ah would bother with a strapon or go fer major bodily harm. Unless ah was crazy, but ah really don think ah qualify fer that."
"..."
>You sleep with your lights on and look over your shoulder now.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1255 in Equestria.
>"So you need some cheering up?"
"Y-yeah, it's just...I trust AJ but she's just so open about everything..."
>"I agree it was a little frightening, but you have nothing to worry about! Hey, look at this!"
>Pinkie pulls a thing from behind your ear.
>You turn to see it and your eyes fall upon a red cleaver.
>You faint.
>"Oh, it was a cake!"
"..."
>"...do you not like red velvet, Anon?"
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1260 in Equestria.
>Fluttershy is over at your house while you had AiE open.
>You go to the bathroom.
>When you come back out, she is in front of the door.
"Uh...what are you doing right here?"
>"Oh, is waiting outside your bathroom not your fetish?"
>You scream and run the fuck away until you reach Twilight's house to find Fluttershy there waiting for you.
>"I'm so sorry Anon, I just wanted to play a little prank for once...I laughed, but now I feel awful."
>You give her a hug and accept the apology.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1266 in Equestria.
>"Anonymous..."
>Your eyes widen and you slam shut the computer.
>A magical aura prevents it.
>"Why are you on this site every day if it so frequently strains your relationships with your friends?"
>Come on man, Celestia asked you a question!
"U-uh..."
>"And furthermore, why haven't anymore clop scenes with me in them been written? I was really popular for a time, and then it seems I have faded from public eye."
>You gulp loudly.
>You know which stories she's talking about.
>"Get back on there and write a good AnonxCelestia fic or I will be tempted to write it myself."
"R-right away princess..."
>She teleports out.
>...
>Why the fuck was she in your house to begin with? Just to say that?
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1270 in Equestria.
>Lyra and you are comparing your AiE favorites.
>"Yeah, I was pretty down with Pale, but come on, who in their right mind would choose BonBon over me? I've got a plot that's never been forgot, just LOOK at it!"
>She waves her behind in your face, tail raised.
"U-uh...yeah."
>"Well it was great talking to you bro, not many other ponies who give a shit about AiE."
"Yeah, I know that feel...bro..."
>She leaves and you cry, rereading every story where you hook up with Lyra to soothe the pain.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1277 in Equestria.
>"And I swear, I have the BIGGEST ladyboner for Shermanator."
"Uh huh."
>"He just paints me in such an empowering light!"
"Uh huh."
>"Can you imagine me being that strong that I could take down a trained p0nyfighter? Ooh, I get giddy just thinking about it!"
"Uh huh, Bon Bon, why are you talking to me about this and not Lyra?"
>She shoves a goof in your face.
>"If you don't want me to tell Lyra you've been harboring a broner over her..."
>Oh man, don't bring up the bro code...
>"...then you won't tell her I like AiE, you got that?"
>You can only nod a Bon Bon sits back in her custom made AiE reading bonechair and pulls her laptop out.
>"So what do you write?"
"I write under anonymous"
>"Pff, you're such a lame faggot, pick a tripcode already. Mine looks like it says Destroyer in it!"
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1280 in Equestria.
>You finished reading them.
>Every story, every pastebin.
"Fina-fucka-lee. Now I can go do something else with my time. I think I'll shower."
>5 minutes later you are 3 threads behind.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1281 in Equestria.
>Bon Bon was back again.
>"So Anon, how's your love life?"
>You choke on the drink you were having before sputtering out an answer.
"Wh-what?"
>"Well in these stories, your're always either a real playboy or a kissless loser. Do you want to stick it in the pony?"
"What the fuck, Bon Bon!?"
>"Hahahahaa! Man, you should see your face. I know you've got the hots for Lyra."
"Dammit, Bonnie, not cool."
>"Did you just call me Bonnie?"
"Uhhh..."
>She flutters her eyes and brings her face in front of yours.
>"Do you...like me, Anon?"
"..."
>You are fucking speechless.
>She bursts into laughter.
>"Geez Anon, you're so fucking gullible! Ha!"
Fucking AiE
...
and Bon Bon
 
>Day 1284 in Equestria.
>AiE has become such a sensation, that it has become a televised show as well.
>Fan favorites like Hearts of Man or goldie oldies like the Egyptian are in production as soon as they get their male lead...
>You.
"Give me one good reason to kiss Luna on stage."
>"The...ability to kiss royalty on camera? There's even a few bedroom scenes..."
"And how in the hell did you convince Luna or Pinkie Pie or any other pony down here to get involved?"
>"Oh, we didn't. The changeling actor's union handles all the ponies, so you would be kissing and making love to the female lead, Chrysalis."
Fucking AiE-TV
 
>Day 1288 in Equestria.
>Of course you said no. You don't want to kiss Chrysalis on stage.
>You want...
"No, gotta keep her out of my head."
>Being bros was hard.
"Godammit puns!"
>Hard for bro.
>In any case, they had to use a shaved diamond dog for the human roles.
>You occaisonally get fans of AiE asking you to do the serious voice.
>"Come on Anon, just like in the show!"
>The show?
>You watch an episode and find the lead dog playing the role of Anonymous.
>>"Me am serious, Night Sky!"
>He sounds like he's mentally retarded. And now everyp0ny thinks you do too.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1289 in Equestria.
>Derpy has just delivered a package.
>"So uh...Anon..."
"Yes?"
>"I was wondering..."
"Yeessss?"
>"Is i-is your..."
>She drops to a whisper.
>"...hot monkey dick..."
>"...really that good like they say in AiE?"
"You know what, screw decency. You want it, you got it."
>You tear your pants off, revealing your boxer briefs and less-than-impressive dick.
"Are you not entertained? Is this not what you were looking for? Why haven't you looked at it yet?"
>She maintains eye contact with one eye.
>"I am looking."
>...
>...
"Are you done?"
>"Nnnnnope."
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1290 in Equestria.
>You are laid up in the hospital with the flu.
"Uughhhh..."
>"What was that, Anon?"
"I thought humans didn"t catch pony diseases..."
>"What on Earth gave you that idea?"
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1292 of Anon in Equestria.
>You are Bon Bon.
"Okay, Zecora, I'm sorry for hiding when you came by before, but I need something to turn Anon into a pony."
>Humans aren't your fetish, but there just aren't enough males around.
>Desperate times.
>"I appreciate the apology miss."
>"But one sorry does not pay for the diss."
>"Besides, that power is outside my grasp..."
>"...it seems like a plot device pulled out the writer's-"
>You already left, disappointed in the expectations AiE led you to believe.
"Fucking AiE.
 
>Day 1292 in Equestria.
>Derpy is at your door.
>"Anon, why did you give Applejack the dick?"
"I-spppbbbb-what?"
>Your drink is all over your shirt.
>"I just read it this morning, it was so romantic..."
"Derpy, that isn't actually ME, that's just some other Anon in some other guy's story."
>"Oh...hey, you doin anything later tonight? I just got this new shipment of condoms in an-"
>You close the door.
Fucking AiE
 
>Day 1300 in Equestria.
>"Well I'm off for a date, Anon. Lock up after me, would you?"
"Woah woah, Bon Bon has a date? who's the lucky mare?"
>Bon Bon stomps her way into your room and gutchecks you with a headbutt.
"Oof!"
>"The STALLION I'm meeting is named Crisp. If one more BEING calls me a fillyfooler, I just might be tried for murder."
"You don't have the guts."
>"But I have the rope."
>...
>"Well bye bye!"
>You sigh.
"Fuckin-"
>"And how come I don't hear you wishing me good luck?"
"Good luck Bon Bon."
Fucking AiE