Title:           Anonymous Bravo episode 2
Author:          GhostKid
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/rMijP27w
First Edit:      Monday 16th of April 2012 06:36:28 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Monday 16th of April 2012 06:36:28 PM CDT

Anonymous Bravo in...Heart's a Flutter
>It is a warm peaceful day in the land of Equestria, where p0nies walk the lands with many a mythical beast... and one particular human...
"HUH! Anon's the name, and mares are my game..."
>You pose and flex in front of Rarity's Vanity Mirror (aptly named) as she takes your measurements
>"Dear I simply cannot fathom why the only thing you wear is this black and blue ensemble! Surely there is something more you prefer."
"Baby, I look best with a long white coat studded in diamonds... but that's copyright infringement where I come from. HUH!"
>Your posing makes Rarity have to re-angle the measuring tape
>"Now hold still, I have to find exactly how buff you are in order to make the...shirt...fit perfectly."
>As she measures the roundness in your arms, you flex till the tape snaps
>She gasps
"Well howsabout you and I go somewhere a little more private, an' you can find out just how buff I am?"
>The next moment you are booted out of the boutique, landing on your bottom and bouncing once or twice
>"You may come back when you are not such a boorish, uncouth ruffian! Hmmph!"
>She storms back into the boutique and you pick yourself off the ground
"Yeah, she wants me."
>That's when you spotted Fluttershy, walking home with a basket in her mouth, and saddlebags full of groceries--a perfect opportunity to help a mare out, and maybe get some recognition...
>Unfortunately for you, it was in the same moment that your 'best friend' showed up
>"Hey Anon, how's it going?"
"Not now Carl, ahm busy."
>Your friend, actually named Doctor Whooves, seems to react to the nickname like it was completely natural
>"With what Anon? You're just staring at Fluttershy."
"And it's delicate business-leave me alone, Carl."
>”Ohh I see… so you like her, is that it? Well have no fear; I have just the invention that will win her heart for sure! I’m always glad to help out a friend!”
“You’re not my friend, Carl. Now go away, I’ve got to help her with those groceries if I want that chance!”
>”Okay, but you’ll be sorryyyy…”
>He smiles at you knowingly, raising an eyebrow, and then trots back off to his house-the INVENTATORIUM
“Weird colt, a little brain addled, you know.”
>A voice behind you
>”Who are you talking to, Anon?”
>It’s Rainbow Dash
“Uhhh… I wasn’t talking to anyp0ny.”
>”Rrrright, well I just wanted to know if you wanted to catch a movie later? I mean…”
>She trails off, blushing and swishing her tail
>”Not  right now, ahm busy.”
>Of course, she couldn’t hear you as she mumbled something under her breath
>”…we’re just friends you know but maybe I thought if you wanted to hang out it would be pretty cool, I really really li…”
>You took this opportunity to go briskly to Fluttershy while RD was distracting herself
“Hey there, baby, you need a big strong man to help you with those?”
>”No, but thank you Anon, I’d be more than willing to accept the help.”
>You lift the pegasus with ease and dash right over to her house, parking her in front of the door
“Anything you need baby-HUH-I’m ready an’ willing to help.”
>”Oh well, in that case, I need some help with a few bear cubs today, if you could just rock them to sleep, that’d be nice.”
“Consider it DONE.”
>You get around her house to find the bear cubs, and step right up to them
“Welll, aren’t you little guys cute.”
>You whisk them up into your arms and rock them, like she said
“You ain’t   anothin but a small bear HUH cryin all the time…”
>It isn’t working, the cubs instead cry
>Time to rock as fast as you can
>You arms become a blur as you change up the song
“A well I bless my soul- what's wrong with me-HUH-I'm itching like a man on a fuzzy tree!”
>the bears are beginning to calm down
“My friends say I'm actin’ wild as a bug-I'm in love-I'm all shook up MM HMMMM oh, oh, yeah, yeah!”
>You stage dive with the two now sleeping cubs, and end right in front of their mother
“Uhhhh, I can explain.”
>She raises her paw, and swipes the cubs out of your arms, then pounds you into the ground with a single slam-literally
“Ow.”
>You wait there, your head and somehow-still-perfect hairdo being the only parts of you sticking out of the ground
“Well…this sucks.”
>”What sucks, Anon?”
>That voice! That hideous young exuberant voice!
>It can only belong to…
“Awwww, go away little red haired girl, I’m tryin to photosynthesize here, an yer blockin’ my sunlight.”
>Applebloom bounces around you
>She always bounces around you
>And talks to you, bothering you and being in her little Cutie Mark Scouts or whatever
>”Ya don’t look lahk your food-toe simian-standing. You’re buried in tha ground.”
“Yeah, sure, could you go get Fluttershy or something?”
>”Okay, Anon!”
>Agonizing minutes pass before you see Applebloom again.
“Uhh, Suzy… where’s Fluttershy?”
>”She can’t come right now, so I had to ask if you rocked the bears to sleep!”
“Ah did, now will you GET ME OUTTA HERE!”
>”Oh, is that all, Anon? Shore thang!”
>She walks behind you and bucks the back of your head
“Ow. Hey, watch tha hair, there, little missy!”
>”Ahm sorry, Anonymous…ahm not strong enough to buck you.”
“If that’s all you’re worried about, Suzy, come back to me in 15 years when you’re co-ed.”
>The comment flies over her head
>Just as well
>”Well don’ worry Anon, I know JUST how to get you out of here!”
“Oh no, please don’t ye-”
>”CUTIE MARK CRUSADER HUMAN SAVERS!”
>She gallops away again, leaving you alone with the animals around the cottage
>You sigh, and the animals that were ignoring you come out of hiding to inspect you further
“Shoo. Shoo ah say!”
>The animals do not shoo.
>One in fact, a rabbit, walks right up to your face wearing a frown
”What’s your problem little guy?”
>He kicks you right in the face
“OOF! Wah you little…if ah wasn’t stuck, it’d be you that’s six feet under!”
>He releases what could be called a chuckle at your misfortune, then blows a raspberry and bounds away back to the cottage, a female rabbit under each of his arms
“Huh. A rabbit after my own heart…if a bit of a JERK!”
>Time continues to pass you by, the sun having already moved past noon
“Feed meeeee…feeheeheeeed meeheheheeeeee!”
>”Anon! Ah got tha girls, an’ we’re gonna get you outta there lickety split!”
“Thank you, thank you girls! You’re finally here! Now, go get in the kitchen and bring me a sandwich! DON’T ASK, JUST HURRY!”
>”Don’t you worry mister, you’re in good hooves!”
>Sweetie Belle says it proudly, and none of the three fillies pays you any heed
>The three fillies grab your hair
“Watch tha hair, watch tha hair!”
>”Whrrr trrhimmg!” they reply “bhmm yrr hrr ‘ss hrrg”
“Thank ya very much. Ah…grew it mahself.“
>With a loud pop, you are freed from the ground, and hurtled into the air
>You land flat on your back
“Thanks…ah think.”
>”Nooo problem Anon!”
>Scootaloo throws you a wink
>”We’re always happy to help and get our Cutie Marks!”
>With that, the three look at their flanks, which are all still bare
>A resounding and collaborative awwwwww accentuates their departure
>You, however, get up and dust yourself off
>For being buried in the ground for a few hours, you’re pretty much clean already
>You rush to Fluttershy’s door and knock, then flex and hold your pose for when she answers
>The door creaks open
>”Hello Anonymous, I hear you rocked the bears to sleep! I didn’t think I told you that I meant singing, but you’re a better caretaker than I thought!”
>Fluttershy giggles
“Yeah, ahm just dripping charm and responsibility.”
>”Well, come on in. Can I get you anything? I usually like tea, but maybe you prefer something else?”
>”Yeah, I prefer a tall glass of water such as yourself-rrroowwrrr.”
>She giggles again
>“Oh Anon, heeheehee! Come sit over here with me!”
>…
>you are now Rainbow Dash
>you’ve been trying to work up the courage to ask out Anonymous, the only other athletic male in all of P0nyville
>you didn’t even care that he wasn’t a stallion, you loved him!
>but every time you came close, he’d disappear
>and now, he’d gone after Fluttershy!
>she didn’t even SEE him the way you did!
>she didn’t deserve him
>so you searched the town to make sure Anon wasn’t elsewhere before dropping in on Fluttershy
>it was late at night, but you knocked on the cottage door
>”Come in~” came the singsong voice of Fluttershy
“ANON!”
>you cry out his name to get his attention, but he is on the couch, head in Fluttershy’s…lap?
>and she’s brushing his hair while he…purrs?
>what the fuck is going on here?
“Is…is hairbrushing your fetish Anon?”
>”Less talkie, more brushie.”
>you faint
>…
>you are Anonymous again
>Rainbro just fainted again
>it happens a lot, maybe taking random naps doesn’t help her sleep schedule
>”Hmmhmmhmm, you like it, don’t you Anon?”
“Yuh-huh.”
>you curl and stretch like a cat, ending up curled on Fluttershy’s lap
>you look out at the door
“Don’t judge me.”
END