Title:           Your fault.
Author:          GallantArrow
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/WXNcnX6a
First Edit:      Saturday 27th of April 2013 12:35:47 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 27th of April 2013 12:35:47 PM CDT

>You've been married to Pinkie Pie for ten years.
>The weather ponies have scheduled a rough downpour for this evening, and have begun moving dark clouds into position.
>You and Pinkie Pie are pruning loose tree branches to help prevent damage to the town.
"Hey Anon! Check it out!"
>Pinkie Pie holds a twig with leaves on both ends just atop her upper lip, as though it were a mustache.
>Laughing, you continue your work.
>Suddenly, thunder booms across the sky. The sound is accompanied by strong gusts of wind.
"Uh-oh, Anon! They must have started a little early!"
>Rain begins pouring down as you and Pinkie begin to quickly walk home.
>Looking around, you notice that everyone is in their homes; nobody else is outside.
>Suddenly there is a blinding flash and a deafening roar as lightning strikes the tree right next to the pair of you!
>Cracking fills your ears as the tree quickly falls towards you. Pinkie screams as you try to jump out of the way.
>You land on your stomach. The tree's cracking stops and you realize you made it out unharmed.
"Anon, help!"
>Leaping to your feet, you turn to face Pinkie Pie.
>The tree has landed on her, trapping her underneath its thick trunk.
>For the first time, you see fear in Pinkie Pie's eyes.
"I'll save you, Pinkie!"
>Positioning yourself over the cotton candy pony, you reach under the tree. It's difficult to grip.
"Anon." Pinkie's voice is weaker this time. "Please."
>You struggle against the tree, trying your hardest to lift it.
 
 
 
 
 
>Veins show on your neck as you let out let out an instinctual growl.
>Try as you might, the tree does not move.
>Looking down, you see tears dripping from Pinkie's eyes.
>Blood soils the ground around her.
>Her breathing has grown weak and erratic.
"Anon... I love you."
>You wrap your arms around her as well as you can, knowing your time is short.
"Pinkie! I can't lift it!"
"It's okay, Anon... I know you tried."
>Pinkie spends her final seconds in your embrace, with you crying into her hair.
 
>Years pass.
>The other ponies don't blame you.
>They try to support you and comfort you.
>You still feel pain.
>You still feel guilt.
>Your back still bothers you, bringing up the memory of your failure each time.
>It was all your fault.
[spoiler]>All because you didn't train deadlifts.
 
Greetings from /fit/.[/spoiler]
 
 
 
 
 
Criticism from anonymous:
>"Hey Anon! Check it out!"
>I personally would think Pinkie Pie would draw attention to something if it was huge (ie: puts on a G3 face), and would rather just do it if it was something small.
>Those two sentences should have gone more like this:
>You look up at Pinkie only to smile
>She wears a miniature shrubbery on as a full on beard and pike helmet.
>She twists her arm, going "Vroom, vroom. I'm bad to the bone, Anon."
>Then she leaps up onto a bicycle that came out of nowhere, driving circles around you.
 
>Therefore, it avoids that overused mustache joke. I find some people take jokes from the show as a lazier way of doing humor while conforming to the pony's personality. Try to do a different take like the one above.
 
>Nice ending /fit/ Anon. I thought it would suck because of poorly done feels, but that spoiler really set it off for me.