- >You are Marcus, and you've finally gotten back into Fluffy breeding
- >You're breeding Alicorns again, but this time you're got some help
- >Jennifer, ex-Spaghetti Land concessions worker, has taken up residence at your humble abode
- >After Cleveland pretty much exploded, she had nowhere to go
- >You, being the nice guy you are, offered her your unused guest room
- >The only guest you would've had anyway is-
- "Sup Marcus?"
- >Speak of the devil
- "Hey, Anon. Starsplash feeling frisky again?"
- "Yep. Like clockwork."
- "Well, bring him on back. It's time to breed Snowball anyway."
- >Anon still brings Starsplash by every so often
- >You're happy to help with his "special needs," but honestly, you need all the help breeding that you can get
- >You're no longer breeding the Alicorns in the back room of your petshop
- >You've pretty much abandoned that place
- >Now, you run a massive breeding farm
- >You built a pretty impressive compound, complete with everything a fluffy could ever want or need
- >You're fairly certain that it's the biggest breeding facility in the country
- >At any given time, you have about 1000 fluffy Alicorns ready to be sold
- >And holy shit, do they sell
- >After Cleveland, demand for normal fluffies plummeted
- >Once people realized Alicorns weren't 150% retarded, demand skyrocketed
- >You make a fucking mint
- >And your overhead costs are next to nothing
- >Jen taught you how to make the cheap-ass spaghetti from Spaghetti Land
- >It contains all the necessary nutrients for fluffies, but it only costs about $30 to feed 100 fluffies
- >And once you figured out how to replicate Spaghetti Land's dispensers, you were pumping it out at an insane rate
- >Business is booming, to say the least
- "Hey, Marcus...you alright?"
- >Shit, you zoned out for a bit there
- "Hm? Oh, yeah. I'm fine. Let's go take care of Starsplash."
- >You head back to the "Fuck Factory"
- >Anon came up with the name
- >The good thing about Alicorns is that they don't constantly fucking beg for fucking spaghetti and love
- >They're actually intelligent enough to just play together and be happy
- >You even get a polite, "Hewwo, missa Mawcus"
- >You finally reach the breeding pens after making it through the Alicorns' living area
- "Alright. Snowball? You ready?"
- >The plain white Alicorn nods her head
- "Snowbaww am weady fo speshuw huggies!"
- >Anon sets Starsplash down in the pen
- >Snowball's at least four times his size, but he somehow manages to mount her
- "So uh...Marcus...how's your lady friend?"
- >Oh boy, here we go dot jpeg
- "Anon...do you have to ask this every time you come over he-"
- "Oh come on! You and I both know that you should be ravaging that p-"
- "Stawspwas aww done!"
- >Saved by the fluffy
- "Good job, little guy. Your daddy was just about to take you on a tour of the farm!"
- "Yay! Stawspwas wuv wawk wif daddeh!"
- >Anon picks up Starsplash with a defeated look on his face
- "Alright, buddy. Let's go... This conversation's not over, brah."
- "See you after your walk, Anon."
- >You put on your shittiest grin as you wave to him and Starsplash
- >Your grin quickly fades as Anon walks away
- "Fuuuuuuck..."
- >He does this every fucking time he visits you
- >Just because there's a female living with you doesn't mean you're...you know
- >And believe me, mister, you've thought about it
- >You've thought the FUCK out of that thought
- >And you always come to the same conclusion:
- >It's just a bad fucking idea and would make both your lives awkward as shit
- >You sigh and move on to the Alicorns that still need breeding
- >After about an hour, you're done
- >And Anon's on his way back
- "...an den da babbeh biwdies was in da snake!"
- "That's right Starsplash. Nature sure is awesome."
- >Suddenly, you hear someone approach from behind
- "So, did you two have fun?"
- "We sure did, Jen..."
- >And, here. We. Go.
- >You turn around to find Jennifer standing right behind you
- >She's jotting some info down on a clipboard
- "You finish breeding all the Alicorns?"
- "Yeah. Just got the breeding done."
- >Anon leans over and whispers to you
- "Not ALL the breeding."
- "Well, I just got done with inventory. I think that's everything for the day."
- "Awesome. I'll go get dinner ready."
- "Oh, is Anon staying?"
- "Um... he's-"
- "Yep. Marcus invited me earlier, right Starsplash?"
- "Wight, daddeh!"
- >After about an hour, you've finished making dinner
- >You're having spaghetti!
- >Just kidding
- >You're really having turkey
- >You're a decent enough chef
- >Sunsplash never complains when you make her stuff
- >Jen never complains either
- >You carry the bird out to the dining room, where Anon, Jen, Starsplash, and Sunsplash are seated
- >The fluffies, of course, are sitting in high chairs
- "...so then I said, 'Nobody fucks with the Jesus!'"
- "Speshuwwy not bad fwuffies!"
- "Oh my God, that's adorable! Did you train him to do that?"
- "No, he just kind of did it. Ooh! Food's done!"
- >You set the turkey down on the table and dish some stuffing into the fluffies' bowls
- >Sometimes you're surprised just how easy those two are to feed
- >Not picky or whiney at all
- >You take your seat and you all begin to eat
- >A few minutes of small talk pass before Starsplash breaks the silence
- "Su...Jen...do yu haf speshuw fwend?"
- >You nearly choke
- >Anon DOES choke from laughing so hard
- "Excuse me?"
- "Yu know...wike wen fwuffies gif speshuw huggies. Maybe dewe sumwun dat yu jus wan plow suuuuu hawd..."
- >You lean over to Anon and pat him on the back to stop his choking fit
- >Then you whisper in his ear
- "Anon, I swear to Christ almighty if this leads anywhere I don't want it to, I will drop the mother fucking hammer so hard..."
- "Don't worry Marcus...you'll like where this is going."
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Trouble In Paradise, Part 1 (Not canon)
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