Title:           Cannibalism, Part 2: Clever Girl
Author:          Fuckasaurus_Fuck
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/aGT3xqiD
First Edit:      Monday 3rd of September 2012 03:00:55 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Monday 3rd of September 2012 03:00:55 PM CDT

>Be Dale, fluffy pony exterminator
>Your patented blend of poisons is the most humane method of dealing with fluffies
>It knocks them out, and painlessly stops their vital functions
>You get a call from your boss late one night, telling you about a job
>Some guy named Anon complained about a pretty large herd outside his house
>You can be there in two hours
>You grab all of your stuff, pack it into the Fluffabago, and drive off
>Two hours later, you arrive
>Wingo, man! Let's do this!, you think to yourself
"Hello, Mister Anon was it? I'm the fluffy exterminator. Hear you got a feral herd"
"Oh hi...Dale, right? come on in I'll fill you in on the details."
>You notice that his windows are boarded up
>He locks the door behind you
"Listen, Dale, this herd's...well it's different"
"Different how?"
"Check out this article."
>He shows you an article on something called "Cannibal Herds"
>You tell him you've never heard of anything like that, but your poisons can handle it
>He warns you that the fluffies are smarter than average, and you grab your poisons and step outside
>Then you notice something strange
>Since you got here, you haven't seen one fluffy
"Hey, Anon...there's no fluffies out here."
"What!?"
"It's dead out here, Anon. No fluffies."
"Dale, be careful, they might be hiding."
>Great
>They don't pay you enough for this
>You silently walk around the yard, in which are quite a few bushes and trees, looking for the fluffies
"Why do these guys always have to live in the middle of nowhere..."
>Then you hear it
"Hewwo...pwease hewp fwuffy...am wost...wan daddeh, wan nummies..."
"What the hell..."
>You look aroun and find a fluffy under a bush
>Its fur looks dirty and it's wearing a collar
>Poor guy must've gotten lost
>You scoop the fluffy up and carry it back to the house
"Hey Anon, I got a lost domestic out here"
"What? Are you sure?"
"Yeah, It's wearing a collar...I'm not leaving it outside, man, can you take care of it for a few hours?"
"Sure...give it here."
>Anon takes the fluffy and walks inside
>You hear the door lock and you get back to work
>Suddenly, you hear leaves rustling
>You turn around, and see the herd emerging from bushes and the shorter trees
>A quick head count reveals 50, maybe more
"Hey there, little guys...I'm gonna be your new daddy."
>They remain silent
"Um...don't you guys want nummies?"
"Yes."
>Creepy
>You start to feel a bit uneasy
"Well, if you guys want food I gotta give you guys some medicine first...alright?"
>One fluffy steps forward, the creepy smile never leaving his face as he speaks
"Nu wan yo medicine...is bad fo fwuffies. We kno wat it do."
>You feel one of them land on your back
>Little bastard must've gotten onto the roof
>Its sharp teeth easily sever the tubing on your poison tanks
>The good news: it's harmless to humans
>The bad news: you have no way to kill all these fluffies
>You grab the tank and tear it off of your back, the fluffy still hanging on
>It hits the ground and the unconscious fluffy flops off to the side
>That one got a mouthful of poison
>It knew what it was doing, and was willing to die to do so
"Clever girl..."
>Be Anon
>You've taken the lost fluffy in to wash and feed
>You checked all over, but its collar seems to have become too worn to read
"Great...well, we can at least post some signs in town. You hungry?"
"Fwuffy hungy..."
>It's pretty quiet...you'll feed it after its bath
>It doesn't complain much as you wash it, and you can soon see its fluff
>It's an Earth fluffy, with pink fluff and a purple mane
>No matter how hard you scrub, you can't seem to get all the dirt out
"Alright, you're all clean...you wan some carrots?"
"Cawwots...nu wan."
"How about spaghetti then?"
>You hate giving this fluffy spaghetti without waking Starsplash, but you can get him some tomorrow
"Nu wan skettis."
"What?"
>No way. No fluffy has ever refused spaghetti
>That's when the pink fluffy smiles
>Those teeth
"Oh shit..."
"Fwuffy wan...gud nummies."
>You run upstairs, straight into your bedroom
>You re-lock the door behind you
>You push your bed in front of the door and grab Starsplash
"Wah wong daddeh?"
"It's nothing, Starsplash...the bad fluffies are just being mean and trying to get in. I got someone to give them owies though."
"Dat gud...meanie fwuffies get owies."
>He seems reassured enough to fall asleep again
>You put him back in his bed and begin to think
"It's gonna be a long night..."