Title:           Anon in Pony Prison
Author:          FireShy
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/xxmBuruY
First Edit:      Tuesday 1st of December 2015 04:56:57 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Last edit on: Tuesday 1st of December 2015 06:37:40 AM CDT

>Everyone has this fantastical idea of their entrance to equestrian.
>Everyone thinks that you are just going to show up and be treated like royalty, greeted with love and kindness.
>What if I told you that wasn’t true?
>What if you were distrusted, ridiculed, and thrown into the dungeons of Canterlot?
>Judged by the life you’ve had no control over
>The life that’s robbed you from innocence withholding you from a life of peace.
>Because that’s what happened.
 
>A few weeks ago I ended up in equestrian, every Horsefucker’s dream!
>Well part of it anyway… The next part is actually fucking the ponies.
>But that didn’t happen
>I walked down the great hallway lined with the glass murals of Equestas past.
>Blinded by my own joy, I saw ponies, who’s faces of horror I mistook for inquisitive surprise.
 “Princess!”
> I exclaimed, upon arriving at thrown.
>I bowed before her, only to be forced further down into the ground at the hooves of the one I thought would be my friend.
>Turning my head, I looked to the ponies I was so ecstatic to see.
>Fear.
>Fear is what their eyes portrayed.
>Not wonder.
>The days following only served to further crush my dreams.
>Subject to mental invasion I was deemed unfit for Equestria.
>A danger to the peace and harmony of their society.
 
>My cell was… cozy.
>There was a bed.
>And a window…
>The view was nice at least.
>I could see the landscape of Equestria from the side of Canterlot Mountain.
>Saying the view was breath taking wouldn’t do it justice.
>The window would be too high for a pony to look out of, but I found I could comfortably rest my chin between the bars and gaze at my would be Eden.
>I had a friend there too.
>Two cells down was a Minotaur.
>I called him minty.
>He doesn’t like that much… says he’s going to rape and murder my family, jokes on him, They are in a different dimension.
>Minty likes to say that about everypony though.
>The guards, the food servants, the walls.
>Rape and murder, rape and murder… Feminists would have a field day with this psycho.
>I tried my best to block him out.
>My daydreaming was cut short by a voice.
>One that wasn’t coming from a psychotic cow horse…
“H-heres your dinner, sir…”
>I turned to view who was speaking to me.
>It was the guard.
>Well this is unusual.
>The guard who is normally in charge of this block ignores me.
>When she brings me food she acts more like shes throwing the plate away rather then serving it to a living, feeling being.
>But this mare wasn’t that guard.  
>And she looks horrified.
>Maybe if I act on my best of behavior feel less intimidated by me.
>I had no idea how long she would be pulling shift down here, but if it was more than just one shift, maybe we could become friends.
>But I’m getting ahead of myself.
“Thank you miss, I suppose I could take a break from my window watching for some dinner…”
>I stood up tall, trying to look as dignified as possible in your tattered unkempt garb
>I reached down and grabbed the plate she had slid under the bars
>The mare before me did little but stair at me
>Her mouth agape and her pupils reduced to the size of peas
“Oh, it’s the green push surprise, please; give my compliments to the chef, out of all the mushes he makes, the green is my favorite.”
>She nodded slowly
>You could see the light lavender coat standing on end
>Her timid eyes never leaving yours as she made her way to the next cell
>Fuck.
>I know I was never good with the ladies, and I know my jokes are bad, but not even a little crack in the ice?
>I sat hard on my bed
>Green mush was the fuckin worst.
 
>Hours had passed and all that mare did was sit on her pillow at the end of the hall
>She had a book in her hooves
>When you tried to ask her what she was reading the poor thing practically jumped out of her skin
>She put her book away after that and has elected to stare at your cell instead
>Any further attempts to communicate were met with more frightful expressions followed by even more focused staring
>The fuck was with this mare.
“Look, I don’t know what I did to get on your personal bad side, but-“
*ZAP*
“Ouch! What the fuck!”
>Stupid mare just zapped you with her magic
“What did I eve-“
>”Shut up! That was just a warning; the next one will knock you into next week! I know your games… The other guard told me about you. About your freaky alien mind control, and I wont have it!”
>A purple aura began to form around her horn
>This mare was crazy
>I jumped back as quick as possible, breaking her line of sight, and hopefully, line of fire.  
“What the fuck are you talking about?! I don’t have mind control powers you psychopathic horse-“
*ZAPPP*
>Darkness
 
“Ughhhh”
>I could only open my eyes for a few seconds before the pain in my head caused me to clench them shut
>The cold cobblestone floor offered little comfort
>My head was throbbing
>If you’ve ever had a hangover, well that’s half of it.
>Imagine having a hangover, but also having been hit in the head by a baseball bat.
>Magic is officially the worst thing ever.
>Remember those threads where unicorns would jerk off anon with magic?
>Yeah, fuck that.
>The muffled sound of voices could be heard emanating from down the hall.
>Not wanting to move, I lay there, trying to make out what was being said
 
“Uhhhgggg what the BUCK Dahlia, you cant hurt the prisoners for no reason!”
“H-he was trying to pull something!”
“Oh? And what could he be trying to pull… I know you’re new, but I’m pretty sure the academy taught you how to deal with a rowdy inmate without trying to KILL them.”
“I never had to deal with MIND CONTROL at the academy, h-he might have tried to get me to let him out!”
“Mind control, wait, what?! Anon doesn’t have mind control powers, he is probably the least magical pile of shit ive ever seen! What in Equestria made you think he had mind control magic?”
“W-well… the other guards told me-“
“ The other guards? Son of a Changling, Someponies going to be getting a horse shoe up their ass for this one, but that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook.  You have latrine duty for the next week. This is block B, none of the creatures here have significant magical abilities. Those prisoners are held up on block E. you know that, I KNOW you know that. It was in the briefing!”
“Y-yes mam. I apologize.”
“You better pray to Celestia Anon is ok from that blast. What in tartus did you do to him? I could hear it  from my office two floors up!”
“I-it was just a standard incapacitation spell… I-I might have overcharged it a little though…”
“Well, hes a big guy… but I’m sure that was pretty painful… I’ll go get medical down here to be sure. First day here, and you’re already on my shit list. Keep it up Dahlia”