Spoonlicker Anon Pt. 15

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Summary: Anonymous is a child that no one can understand, not even Flutters. Twilight has learned 3 pseudo-words, several signs/ gestures, and a greeting. As more and more becomes known about Anonymous, the more caution turns to sympathy. With her friends now all on board, the next big question is less about figuring out Anon, but how to help.

 

Last Chapter: Anonymous hunts through the book for the missing minks, but stops when they spot pictures of Dinosaurs and Dragons. Twilight is equally amazed and frustrated, and asks if Anon is a shapeshifter. The answer always comes back as no, and she moves on. After careful consideration Twilight places Anonymous in a brand new subfamily from hominidea and names the new species hominem. Pinkie and Fluttershy show up a little later with a blinding flash. Pinkie tries to walk up to Anonymous but Twilight stops her and explains that she has to introduce herself first. Anon quickly warms up to Pinkie Pie and pets her head after a brief misunderstanding between Pinkie and Twilight. Now it’s Fluttershy’s turn.

 

Anonymous is just as quick to pet Fluttershy, much to Fluttershy’s relief. The yellow and pink blobs enjoy themselves until Twilight asks them to reciprocate via acting. Pinkie first attempts to offer some of the strudel she brought, but Twilight stops her in fear of conditioning Anon’s behavior. Following Fluttershy’s example, Twilight has Pinkie help apply fresh bandages to the arms. Before Anon will allow them to treat its body, it demands to put the clothes on first. Dash flies in to update the group on lunch, but they choose to stay in the barn. After a few note based questions and shenanigans, Pinkie and Fluttershy leave while Twilight and Anonymous take a nap.

 

Posted in Thread 931

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>A blunt jab against your stomach interrupts your sleep. The lazy afternoon air seduces your senses towards inaction, and you initially try to ignore the mild discomfort. Your brain, however, refuses.

>Remembering where you are and who is beside you drives the calm away. Spying a sleeping Anonymous, you look down to your stomach and find the point of contact.

>The little devil kicked you!

 

>Grudgingly awake, you give an annoyed glare at the sleeping attacker but the cluster of covers hides your target.

>Easing your head back down, you fight off the constant ticking of your now active brain and try to squeeze out a few more hours. Semiconscious sleep takes over, allowing both your body and mind to win.

>While your muscles recover your whispering thoughts analyze themselves.

 

>Strolling through the streets of Ponyville, you and Anonymous draw the town’s attention like a pair of wandering salesponies.

>From your podium you explain this new discovery to the gathered audience. Disbelief and wonder consumes the crowd as you go into intricate detail; the townsfolk riveted by your every word.

>Once you demonstrate Anon’s docile nature the ponies rush to greet the hominem; blurting out a constant stream of hellos and questions. Anon’s arms flap wildly in an effort to answer each one.

>The mass of bodies soon fade and drift away leaving the pair of you alone on the road. Heading home, you lead Anon into the kitchen where Spike was currently making himself a jeweled treat.

>You sit down at the table and are joined by the others. Cracking open a notebook the three of you pick up where you last left off. First going over today’s lesson plan about Equestria, you make a few of the basic signs. Anon replies in kind while Spike watches and manages the more complex signals for you.

>The model of efficiency.

 

 

>Another wave hits, washing out one reality with another.

>Sitting in the library, you loom over a hazy book. Spike rushes in; breathing heavily and shouting your name.

>”Twilight, come quick!”

“What is it?”

>”Homini….homini…”

“Calm down. Breath.”

>Spike bends over and catches his breath. After a minute he stands straight and points outside.

>”More Anonymouses.”

“Why didn’t you say so!”

>Creating your own mini purpleboom, you rush out the door and race to the edge of town. Once there, thunderous steps halt your advance and force your gaze skywards.

>A giant lumbering beast the size of a barn occupies all of your sight. You almost miss the horde of creatures clamoring on the beast’s back until they start shouting in their native tongue. Anonymous suddenly appears next to you, and begins yelling as well.

>The collection of hominems wave wildly in response. Another set of creatures are also making a commotion from up high, a strange yet familiar form. Accompanying the bipedal pack are what looks to be strangely large zebra. Again you note the distinct lack of jewelry.

>One of the zebras jumps down from the mount and approaches the two of you. First rubbing and nuzzling Anon, it then starts speaking the same way as the hominems; elated tones prevailing alongside the broad smile.

>After a short conversation the unusual zebra turns to you.

>”I thankch yew for waachking overd hA-non.”

>As your eyes shoot wide modules of logic whirl at high speeds creating a low humming sound in your head. Despite the heavy accent you can understand them!

>Absurd levels of excitement have you bouncing in place; you’re nearly taking off where you stand. A niggling reminder urges you to remain presentable, but the rest of your thoughts drown out the notion.

 

 

“You can talk! This is amazing! Uh…you’re absolutely welcome! I’m Princess Twilight Sparkle! Where did you come from?”

>The stranger stares at you with an awkward gaze for a moment before muttering something to Anon in the harsh language. More incomprehensible sounds come from Anon while you anxiously wait.

>Whatever the reply was, it makes the zebra happy.

>”I khome from my mhom and dahad.”

“That’s not…where do you live? Are you actually a zebra? What about the hominems, where did you find them? Are they friendly? Can you teach me to talk like that?”

>You push forward until you are face to face, weaving your wishes together into an unending string.

>The pseudo-zebra chuckles and points a hoof far off into the distance.

>”Yes. Find us pascht the mountanes.”

>Without another word, the zebra and Anon climb atop the oversized lizard and ride off. Your mental daily planner launches into a reorganization frenzy to free up your schedule as soon as possible.

>Halfway through, a simple answer reveals itself. You’re a princess, and princess duties take the highest priority.

>You’re going to go on your first diplomatic mission.

 

>A shifting from underneath your outstretched wing pops the dream bubble. With a slow gentle turn of your head you watch Anonymous sluggishly wiggle out from underneath the blankets.

>You return your wing into place as the clothed hominem lugs itself free. In a new display of movement they move across the floor towards the discarded shoes on all fours, and plop down to sit.

>The armor slides on effortlessly while the tightening bands secure the pair in place. One of Anonymous’ hands makes it to a nearby barrel and helps pull Anon to its feet.

>You fight your own struggle to stand with the assistance of a little magic. Once upright, you join the wobbly Anon pushing its way out of the door.

 

 

>That same guiding hand from before lands on your tender back, and the small body leans against you. The surprise weight from the added burden fires a warm shiver through your core. Try as you might to restrain the tiny smirk, it is a losing battle.

>With firm yet careful steps, you half carry Anonymous up to the house.

 

>All is quiet when the two of you enter the house. An artificial dusk darkens the rooms where the windows miss the sun.

>Unbothered by the lone sensation, Anon wanders ahead with a clear direction. Following along you spot the bathroom door close, and stop to give Anon some privacy.

>In the meantime, you keep yourself occupied by examining the empty living room. Various pieces of furniture spread out from the fireplace punctuated by the solitary rocking chair.

>Shouldn’t Granny Smith be around?

 

>Anonymous shortly emerges from the restroom; again with wet hands. Making another attempt to first get Anon to stay in place you point from it to the floor while mouthing ‘stay’.

>This time there are no footsteps after you shut the door, and when you exit you find Anon still in the same spot; its awaiting gaze meeting yours in the hallway.

>Unsure how to proceed yourself; you nudge Anonymous into the living room while you think.

>There wasn’t really a plan to come up until dinner, but Anon has brought you here early. Still, you were expecting at least one of the others to be around even if they were busy in the fields.

>You scan the room for some way to entertain Anon. There must be something around here to play with. What would an Apple and a hominem have in common?

 

>Starting in the far corner: there are logs for the fire, a fire poker and an ash shovel. Near the love seat is a basket full of knitting supplies and another apple themed quilt in the making.

>Next to the largest couch is a stack of old newspapers and completed crossword puzzles. The one on top is still being worked on, and you take a peek.

 

 

>4 down: an empty, voluble, pretentious talker. The word is 7 letters long, and a previous answer shows that it starts with W.

>With a haughty hum you find the nearby pen and finish the puzzle.

>Windbag.

 

>Having sated your curiosity you continue the search.

>The idle rocking chair wears a blanket draped over its back, and a similar basket of yarn hides nearby. Against the neighboring wall resides a worn phonograph.

>On the table in front of the love seat are a coloring book and a stack of papers; an accompanying box of crayons lies on the floor. Those should do nicely.

>Directing Anonymous over, you sit the biped down. Turning the coloring book to a fresh page, you give Anon a crayon while you hunt through the stack of papers.

>Bulleted lists of varying ideas, tried and untried, fills the stack; the subject matter unexpectedly diverse. New ways to find cutie marks is the main focus, but there are designs for buildings and contraptions too. A few of the more ambitious ones have accompanying doodles to match.

>While the majority is innocent enough; such as rock collecting and cloud chasing, others are more worrying. There is no desire to be around should the ‘firehouse paintbrush’ come to fruition, and the mechanical mess that is the ‘Applebucker 9000’ honestly terrifies you.

>Putting the unnerving images aside, you manage to find some blank sheets and place them next to Anon should they want to draw instead of color.

 

>Grabbing the crossword puzzle book, you take a seat on the large sofa and get to work. Not wanting to complete the whole thing and ruin someone else’s fun, you dip the pen in your magic.

>With minimal concentration your magical aura embodies just the tip. Purple tinted letters crawl across the paper as you answer; disappearing at your command whenever the current brain teaser is finished.

 

 

>In between solving page after page, you peek over to Anonymous. Assorted colors of crayons roll across the tabletop while the one in use scribbles with lightening speed. The fixated glare practically burns through whatever image. Nothing appears to matter to the hominem save for the current work of art.

>Sinking further into the cushions you gaze at the absent fire. Musings of a cold winter’s eve being fended off by burning logs seep into reality, and illusionary pictures of this very situation on a quiet night comforts your thoughts.

 

>Too quickly you are done with the entire book while Anon has moved from coloring to drawing. Your mind is currently hooked on word problems, and you move onto today’s newspaper.

>Glancing at the headlining article causes your heart to skip.

THE PONYVILLE CREATURE: The Latest Local Discovery!

In a public address, Princess Cadence has given new insight to the strange creature to suddenly appear in Ponyville a few days ago. According to her ‘The being we are calling Anonymous is not a threat, and has shown to be friendly. Caution is still advised until we know more about them[…]’

Princess Twilight Sparkle continues to oversee the situation, and has reportedly taken the creature to Sweet Apple Acres. Princess Celestia stated that anypony with information on the new creature should come forward, and has offered a reward of one hug for any clues about the creature’s home or family.

>Skimming through the rest of the article it goes on to cover the patrolling guards, scandals of rich ponies with illegal pets, and a growing commotion in the Canterlot embassies.

>Your focus sticks with the first portion; the word was spreading. Although the data you gave was a little out of date, it isn’t wrong. With news circulating  you may soon be able to take Anonymous into town without incident.

 

 

>The prospect alone throws you into a titter. Since Anonymous doesn’t like being alone, staying in town would be perfect. Plus Anon has repeatedly gone into Ponyville on its own accord. It clearly doesn’t mind the ponies.

>No, it is the ponies that are bothered by Anonymous; and that mood is shifting. They only needed one good lesson to completely come around with Zecora. When you give your next update everything should be straightened out.

>And then Anon can stay with you!

 

>You could be at home, you could have all of your books and tools at the ready, you could send messages to princess Celestia freely again. You could finally solve the hominem puzzle!

>The newspaper suddenly crumples inside your magical grip. After giving a cursory effort at un-wrinkling the paper you set it down. Crossing the lonely gap provided by the empty house, your determination drives you to Anon.

>Numerous drawings cover the surface of the table; each one matching the treasured picture left in the barn. What you understand to be Anonymous and the guardians are doing all sorts of activities. There is even one with them on a boat.

 

>The front door spurts open, accompanied by ornery grumbling and the tacking of the walker.

>”Rassin’ frassin’ nosey bodies. Can’t leave an old mare in peace.”

>Granny Smith enters the house and spots you by the table. Upon seeing you, her bitter mood lightens.

>”Oh, hello there deary; didn’t expect ta see you there. And you brought your little friend, too.”

“Gud hafternoon”

>Anonymous stays seated and looks over the green mare from the floor.

>”Don’t let me bother ya; I’m just gonna head into the kitchen and get dinner started.”

“Ah’ll help.”

>”No need for that, Ol’ Granny’s got it covered.”

“I want to.”

>She eyeballs you for a second before continuing into the kitchen.

>”Alright then, get a move on. We got a lot of mouths to feed.”