Anon's Horn: Chapter 3

Previously, on Flutterrape's "Anon's Horn"...

http://pastebin.com/Tz3FhJ9j

 

Chapter 3

 

>You're on your way back home, thinking about the horn and whatever it is inside it.

>Now you know it's not some part of a magic beast from the forest with only a faint remain of power. It has self sentience of some kind.

>And it may have been influencing your decisions. It was subtle when it did, but, in retrospective, you can see it clearly.

>Before, you had the suspicion and fear of it being dangerous or unstable in some way. Now you know for sure.

>Maybe you should have destroyed it. It is the easiest and safest way to solve the problem.

>But you're still not sure if that's what you want.

>The horn could have spurred your desire for power for his own interest, but you can't deny you truly felt it. You still want to learn magic, and the horn still is your best chance. Maybe you can try reasoning with him, negotiating.

>Sure, it's almost sure it'll try to influence you again, or cast another hallucination. But it won't be so easy now that you know what's coming. You hope.

>No, you trust yourself, you've faced some sick bullshit before. And overcame it.

>You've suffered under the LOL players' tiranny. You have fought against the SC2 most complex build orders. You have remained sane after the 50 Shades of Gray and faced at the undeniable evil of the Bieber fans. You have endured the undescriptable horrors of /b/.

>You are Anonymous, and you will not be bested by some random lowsy evil from such a childish and girly world.

>With your ego fired up and your determination reinforced, you speed up. You're gonna show that shitty bone what's what.

>As you reach the center of the village, you notice a big crowd at the main square. It must be market day. You decide to go 'round it, to save time, when you hear a voice calling your name.

>"Anon? Is that you, darling? What a wonderful coincidence!"

>Rarity. She's trotting towards you, an army of bags and cases floating behind her, covered in a mild cobalt glow.

>"Be a gentlecolt and hold my things for a while. Yes, that's it. Thank you so very much, my dear. Would you be so kind to help me with the rest of my shopping? I would really appreciate another pair of hooves... Oh, you know what I mean!"

>Shopping with Rarity. Your face goes pale and you swear you could hear your balls dropping on the floor. Oh, please God, kill me now!

Actually, Rarity, I was just going to...

>"Come on, no time to lose!"

>It's hopeless. She's already off, into the crowd, looking for the next bargain.

>You sigh, your hands full of her purchases. You think of dropping it all on the floor and leaving her, but you know offending her would only make things worse. She could even start whining.

>You shiver, as you try to recover whatever's left of your courage. Perhaps it won't be as bad as last time. Last time, you were shopping for materials for some new designs of her and furniture for your new house. You were looking for some reasonably 'male-ish', big enough articles for a human and she was trying to convince you to buy fancy, expensive, girly as fuck pink bullshit.

>You still shudder when you remember the arguments you two had. You both said things you regretted.

>That was a while ago, and you forgave eachother. Neither of you wants to repeat that...

>Fuck it, you made your choice. You value more your friendship with Rarity than your curiosity about the horn and the Shadow. You follow her.

>Besides, the horn can wait. Until now, the drawer has proved to be a good enough cointaiment for it. And you're sure it will be alright to leave it alone for a few hours.

So, what are you buying all of this for, Rarity? A new design?

>She turns at you and smiles. It is a charming smile, a smile that makes you smile back.

>"Isn't it always? This time, it is one for Angel. He's going to look absolutely fabulous with the outfit I'm preparing for him!"

>You frown. The bags you're holding are full of pink silk, green velvet and blue muslin. And is that a blonde, curly wig?

You do know Angel is a male, don't you?

>"Of course I do! Why would you ask such a thing?"

>You frown at her. She looks truly surprised. You know you won't be able to make your point.

It's just that... Forget it. I'm sure he'll enjoy this present.

>She doesn't look convinced, but doesn't say anything either. The next thing she buys is a silver tiara.

>You spend a while shopping, haggling and looking for the perfect accessories. Now that you have given up on Rarity's taste, you help her finding the most girly and cheesy crap you can find. You suggest a pair of tiny glass shoes, a small pink purse and even a glitter-covered fairy wand.

>You know you will have to compensate Angel for this. He may be kind of a dick, but you two grew fond of each other when you stayed at Fluttershy's. He's your kind of dick.

>Further away from the fabric and trinkets stands, you see the vegetables market. You nudge Rarity and hand her the bags.

Hold this for a minute. I'm going to get my present.

>She gives you a distracted nod and keeps bargaining for a golden belt. Her horn glows as her telekinesis grabs all the packages you were struggling to carry without effort. Such Generosity.

>You head to Carrot Top's stand.

>"Good morning, Anon! Long time no see. Have you gave up on your barbaric, unheathly diet yet?"

>You laugh.

Oh, no, Top. I won't give up on fried eggs and cakes until my teeth rot off and my heart collapses. No, I came for a gift. Give me the biggest crate you can find and fill it with your best carrots.

>"As you wish. Do you want me to wrap it or do you preffer to do it yourself?"

>Of course. Only in P0nyville could you find a street market carrot stand with wrapping paper.

>Sometimes, you just have to love Equestria.

>With your carrot-patterned crate in your hands, you go back to Rarity. She's glaring at you, the smile still on her face.

>"Do you really think that's appropiate for a birthday gift?"

>You smirk.

Of course I do. And I'm willing to bet you he's going to like it more than yours.

>Her smile freezes.

>Oh, shit. You know that expression. You hit her pride.

>"Oh, it is on."

>Fuck.

>Now she's the one smirking.

>"If we're going to bet, we should do this properly. With proper stakes on the line."

>You don't like where this is going.

>"If you lose, you will work for a month in the Boutique as my assistant..."

That's not so bad.

>"...and occasional mannequin and/or model when I or my inspiration demand it"

>You're deadly serious now. Modelling for Rarity can be a true living hell. You'll have to think of something worthy.

"Oh! Oh! I know what!"

Fine. But, if YOU lose, you're gonna do my work at the farm for a week.

"Pussy"

>She doesn't seem too worried.

Without magic.

>It is faint, but you can see her knees shacking for a second. You look at her eyes, you both can see the bet is fair. She would hate dirty work as much as you would hate being her dressing toy.

>You kneel and solemnly stretch her hoof with your hand. There's no need for words, you trust in eachothers word.

>"Now that that's out of the way, tell me..." she recovers her charming smile and prods your arm with her horn. "...how are you doing in your new house?"

>Well, that came out of the blue. You're not surpised with the small chitchat -you live in a land filled with females, after all- but that's an odd question. You moved to you house three weeks ago, it's not a new topic.

As well as you could expect, I guess. You know, I was surprised that P0nyville had a house with roofs tall enough for me.

>"And don't you miss the cottage? Living with Fluttershy?"

>This time, you clearly see a spark of slyness in her eyes. What is she up to?

Not specially. I mean, I had a great time there, with all the little animals and all that. But I feel better on my own.

>She clings to you, her voice turning into an almost conspiratorial whisper.

>"It's okay, you can tell me. Did Fluttershy so something that made you uncomfortable?"

>What? You sigh. You get it now, you're talking to Rarity, the Queen of Rumors and Gossips. You'll have to be careful with what you tell her.

No, not at all. She was sweet and kind. Always looking after me, cooking for me, helping me getting familiar with this... world...

>Now that you think of it...

I really appreciate what she did for me, but I needed more... space. I wanted to live my own life.

>"So, you left because she was to clingy."

I wouldn't say that. She took me in when I arrived, lost and confused. I don't mean to offend you, but she was the only one who didn't think of me as a monster or an animal when she first saw me. And she took care of me and introduced me to Equestria. Now I can take care of myself.

>You don't want to sound ungrateful.

I love her. I really do.

>Rarity's eyes open widely at that statement. Fuck, that's not what I meant. You look at the sky, searching the right words in your head.

She's like a little sister to me. She's kind and innocent and cute but she's a bit... too... childish?

>You glance at Rarity. She looks disappointed and thoughtful.

I didn't mean to talk bad of her. She's still one of my best friends. It's just that I...

>"No, don't worry, I understand what you mean."

>She smiles at you. You're not sure, but that smile seemed a bit forced.

>Akward silence. Suddenly, Rarity jumps.

>"Oh, my gosh, look at the time! I'm sorry, Anon, I had a great time with you, but I simply must finish Angel's dress right away if I don't want to be late!"

>You look at the clock tower near the City Hall.

What do you mean? It's only half past two. Wasn't the party at six o'clock?

>She magically picks all her things from your arms, and trots away.

>"It is, but I'm going with Fluttershy to the spa before that. To make sure she's not too nervous. See you at the party!"

>Wut.

Wait!

>She turns to you. You don't want her to tell Fluttershy what you just said.

Please, could you not...

>You don't finish. Maybe it's not that bad that they talk about it. You just told her how you feel.

>What's wrong with that? She probably feels the same way towards you.

>You notice Rarity is still waiting.

Nevermind. Have a nice time, you two!

>She smiles one last time and trots away. You stare at her as she leaves, lost in thought...

"Dat flank!"

>Shut up.

"But you agree. Don't even dare to deny it."

>Okay, back to reality.

>On your way back home, you walk in front of Twilight's tree-library-house-thing. It seems to be quite quiet inside. That must mean she's home. If she weren't, you'd be hearing Spike's snores.

>Perhaps she could help you about the horn. She's a magic nerd, and if she can't, she'll most certainly have a book that will.

>Anyway, no harm in asking.

>You walk to the door and knock. Spike opens.

>"Oh, Anon. Thank Celestia you're here!"

 

>Well, that was a bit overdramatic.

>Turns out Twilight has just finished her essay about the Crystal Empire and had a bit of a meltdown because she wasn't sure if it was worthy. And Spike's not much of a literary critic, so they were in desperate need of a second opinion.

>You're not a scholar either, but you've read quite a lot and, since you came from time to time to Twilight asking her for a good read, she kinda respects your opinions in the matter.

>And that's why you lay terrified on the floor of the library, with a crazed purple unicorn on top of you scrubbing a bunch of written papers on your face and shouting.

>"ISN'T IT TERRIBLE? I KNEW IT WAS, I KNEEEW IT! THE INDEX IS VAGUE, THE DATA WAS INSUFFICIENT, I DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME! WHAT AM I GONNA DO? SHE'LL LOCK ME IN THE DUNGEON FOR SU-"

>You put a hand on her chest and grab her horn with the other. She shuts up with something close to a hiccup. Spike looks quite astonished.

>Good, now you have their attention.

First off, please, get off of me.

>She obeys, mouth gaping and eyes lost. Looks like the horn is more sensitive than you thougth.

"I'll take note of that"

Second, yes, don't worry, I'll take a look at your work, no problem. But before that, I wanted to...

>The pages of Twilight's essay are scattered along the floor. Most of them are full of perfectly hornwritten text. But some have graphs or illustrations.

>Like the one you're looking at. It pictures a big black crowned unicorn clad in some kind of steel armor, sitting in a throne made of dark glass.

>With your red horn on his head, right over a pair of red-pupil green eyes and a fanged grin.

In fact, as a token of our friendship, I think I'm gonna read it thoroughly right now.

 

>You are Rarity.

>And you are in the spa, talking with Fluttershy about your conversation with Anon.

>Right now, she'squealing from pleasure.

>"He said he loves me! He said it!"-she takes a deep breath-"...yaaay..."

You're not listening, dear. He did say he loves you, but only as a friend. A sister at the most.

>That calms her down. She would have been pleased and fluttered to hear that from somep0ny else. But she wants more from Anon.

>"..D-do you think he'll be into incest...?

>You sigh.

Look, Fluttershy, I think you're being a little bit too... passionate about him-

>"Of course I am! I'm in love!"

>The whole spa must have heard that. Very few times before have you heard Fluttershy speaking in such loud voice. Choose your words carefully, Rarity.

I know, darling, I know. But that's no reason to pressure him. He's an intelligent and sensitive being: you can't captivate him with the promise of food or tame him with your Stare as the other animals.

>"I already know that! I'm the only one who didn't consider him a monster when he appeared, Miss 'Generosity'!"

>Wow, that was unexpectedly harsh from her. But you have to admit she's right. When she first introduced you to the tall bald ape, you didn't consider him any better than a diamond dog. And you don't exactly admire diamond dogs.

>It wasn't until he came to your Boutique, asking for new clothes, that you noticed the virtues of the human: long, dexterous fingers, sharp wit, and a grim sense of humour you never heard before.

>He proved his worth to you, and you decided to give him a chance to change your initial impression of him.

>And oh boy, he changed it.

>When you both went shopping together for the first time, to help him find appropiate furniture for his new house, he did something nop0ny had ever done to you.

>He seriously disputed you.

>Of course he wasn't the first person ever to disagree with you, but he proved to an opponent far more worthy than anyp0ny you quarreled with before.

>He responded every single one of your insults, demolished all the arguments you could think of, and attacked you with a ferocity that required even the last bit of your guile to defend against.

>The battle ended in a draw, none of you willing to cede. And you acted haughty and offended for a week. How could you not, you have a reputation to mantain.

>But deep down within your heart, you were greatly impressed by the foul-mouthed monkey. He had shown you courage.

>He would be a tough nut to crack. But one fitting for a mare such as yourself.

>"Ehem."

>Fluttershy is glaring at you.

>Oh my Gosh! How long have I been quiet?

>Was I smiling?

>Please, oh, please, don't let her guess what I was thinking about.

>Quick, Rarity, say something. What were we talking about?

You're absolutely right. But if you show yourself too hasty or forceful, you'll give him the impression that you don't care about his feelings. Remember, he values freedom above all else; that's why he bought his own house.

>She looks away, ashamed and thoughtful. Phew, crysis averted.

I still think your best option is sticking to the plan.

>She turns her face to you, her need for your advice in her eyes.

For most p0nies, it would be best to strike at phase two. But, you being... well, you, I'd recommend to wait until three.

>She nods. She's not going to take offense from that, she's always the first one to admit her shyness.

Then, he may be a little more... unpredictable, but you'll get the most honest answer possible.

>"I already know what it will be."

>You wince. She's being a little too assertive.

Fluttershy, my dear. Don't get your hopes too high. He may not share your feelings...

>She doesn't respond. Her eyes are lost in thought. You never saw her so serious before.

>You discreetly sigh. Fluttershy's your best friend, and you will help her in everything you can to captivate Anon. But you know she won't succeed.

>Anon himself told you. Fluttershy's too childish, he wants a more mature mare. Somep0ny like-

>You bite your own tongue as a punishment. You shall not steal him from your best friend. You're not selfish like that.

>You're Generosity embodied.

>You smile, a new thought crossing you mind.

>And as such, you know better than anyp0ny else the joy of sharing.

 

>You are Anonymous.

>And you are freaking the hell out.

>You have been reading Twilight's essay, back at your house, for quite a while. It begins with some boring-ass ancient history about the origins of the Crystal Empire and yadda-yadda-yadda.

>But it gets interesting when Sombra appears.

>Sombra was the first son of the Crystalglow unicorn dinasty, and rightful heir to the throne. Everyp0ny thought of him as a promising, if a bit cold, ruler for the Empire. That is, until the Crystalglow king found an orfan female alicorn child in the streets of the capital.

>He adopted her, and raised her as her own child. Soon, she grew into a beautiful mare, eclipsing Sombra in power and popularity. Unsurprisingly, laying convalescent from an unknown disease, the king named the alicorn as his heir with his last breath.

>Understandably mad, Sombra bursted out of the Crystal palace, swearing vengance against his family, his Crystal compatriots, the alicorn race, and everything else he could think of. Ignoring the pleas from the queen and his step-sister, he abandoned the Empire in a self-imposed exile.

>During the years after Sombra's departure, the Crystal Empire enjoyed an unprecedented period of glory and prosperity under the rule of the alicorn queen, rivalizing even with Celestia's kingdom.

>But Sombra came back. In his wanderings, he had searched, learnt, owned, subjugated and controlled every single secret of dark magic ever known to a p0ny. And many that were unknown. He used this knowledge to reclaim his throne.

>He singlehandedly defeated the Crystal Armies, expelled his stepsister from the Empire and magically enslaved the totallity of its population. Realising the threat, Celestia and Luna accepted the alicorn queen into their court and forged an alliance to dethrone the crazed unicorn.

>The alicorns' might bested Sombra, vanishing him to the pole. But with his last spell, Sombra cast a curse on the whole Crystal Empire, condemning it to oblivion until his return. The alicorn's descendants remaind under the Sky Sisters' care, preparing for the dreaded return of Sombra.

>And you already know what happened next. After being defeated again by Cadence and Spike, Sombra burst into pieces, one of wich almost pierced through your skull.

>So, long story short, you have the mind of the most powerful, evil, crazed unicorn ever known in Equestria locked up in a drawer next to your bed.

>That's just dandy.

>Oh, fuck. What time is it?

>Half past six. Shit. You better get going.

>You're slightly more than a bit uncomfortable with having Sombra's soul alone in your bedroom, but that can wait.

>Pinkie Party first. Then booze. Then, you'll deal with it like an adult.

>Maybe, you could ask Twilight about it at the party. But you'll have to be careful.

>That horn is still your best chance to get magic. Sombra's presence just means you must be REALLY cautious with him. If you play your cards right, you may even convince him to teach you.

>But you don't think Twilight's gonna be that tolerant. After all, last time she saw the wizard, he was trying to kill her. And she helped to blow him apart.

>Yeah, it'll be better if you ask her discreetly. Knowing her, waiting to phase two would be enough.

>She's always been kind of a light drinker.

>Okay, that's decided, then. Let's get ready.

>You change your clothes. Not that you have something more appropiate for the party. You asked Rarity only to copy the clothes you came with:  a black suit, a white shirt and a red tie. You didn't wanted to run any risks, knowing her fashion sense.

>But at least you put a clean set.

>Grab the carrots crate and run outside.

>When you close the front door, you feel a faint burst of regret. Perhaps you should deal with the horn now...

>Fuck it.

>That's future Anon's problem. Possibly, future drunk Anon's.

 

>Everyp0ny in Ponyville has had at least one Pinkie Party in its life.

>And, therefore, everyp0ny in P0nyville knows that any good Pinkie Party always has three phases.

>When you arrive to Fluttershy's cottage, phase one has already began.

>The front of the house is densely covered in balloons and streamers, with a big "HaPpY bIrThDaY, AnGeL!" banner right over the entrance door. Pinkie Pie Style.

>You can hear that light-hearted music p0nies love and loud chatter from the inside. Seems that the cottage is packed full.

>You approach to the door and leave the crate on the floor to knock it. You've barely raised a fist, when the door bursts open revealing one of Pinkie's widests smiles.

>"Hi,Anon!Sogladyoucouldmakeit!Quickcomeinside.You'rejustintimeforthecake!"

>She picks you and your present up and drags you inside in a blurr of pink. Somehow, she manages to toss your crate to the gift pile and place you right besides Angel without pushing anyp0ny or hitting anything.

>Fluttershy squeals when you suddenly appear between her and Angel, looking severely disoriented and slightly terrified. The rest of the mane 6 doesn't seem surpised at all. Pinkie's nowhere to be seen.

...i, girls. Hi, Angel. Happy Birthday, pal.

>Angel smiles at you. He's wearing a tiny party hat and looks delighted.

>Heck, why wouldn't he? He's having two birthday parties in a year. And one's a Pinkie Party.

>Before the p0nies could resume their conversation, everything goes dark. Like pitch-black dark.

>You can hear several p0nies screaming, Fluttershy being the loudest. You also feel something clutching to your leg. The light comes back before you can do anything.

>There's a gigantic white and light blue cake right in front of Angel. It's as tall as you and twice as wide. And from it's top, amid the unavoidable cloud of confetti and streamers, pops out Pinkie Pie.

>"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ANGEL!!!"

>Everyp0ny laughs and applauds. You take advantage of the racket to discreetly slip your leg out of Fluttershy's strong grip. She's such a scaredy cat.

>Once you all sang the mandatory "Happy Birthday to you" and the cake's been divided among the guests, the party moves outside.

>Pinkie and Flutters have prepared the meadow behind the cottage for the occasion. There's several tables full of different kinds of pastries and snacks, a drinks stand and a DJ booze. For the moment, Vinyl is holding back, playing mild music. She looks eager for phase two.

>Everything is disposed around a big oak, the space under it set for children games. You see fillies playing at "pin the tail to the p0ny", "fish the apples", "Celestia says", "who's the changeling?" and "Storm of Chaos".

>You spend some time walking around the tables, chatting with several p0nies and devouring the Cake's most delicious creations for a good half an hour. You eventually decide it's time to go get some booze.

>At the drinks stand, you find Rarity, sipping from some kind of deep blue cocktail. You order a cider pint.

What's that?

>She reaches you the glass and its straw.

>"Here, taste it."

>You reluctantly sip though the straw, trying not to think about the indirect kiss. It tastes great, surprisingly sweet, aromatic... and fucking strong. You can barely avoid coughing.

Woah, that's some good shit! What's in it?

>"Two parts of grape juice, one of lavender nectar and seven of blueberry liquor. I made it up myself. I call it, the "Mare-vel".

>You laugh at the puny joke as you return her the drink to grab your mug. She pointedly places the straw in her lips and takes a slow, long sip. While eyeing you. Intensely.

>...Is she trying to imply something? Did she just offer you a sip to get an indirect kiss? Or to give it to you? You are still pondering this when she casually walks away, a slight smirk on her face.

>Maybe she just wants to get you wondering. You grin, admiring her capacity to upset you with just a simple gesture and a casual glance.

"She's good... Her banging shall be lasting and thorough."

>You follow her. If the party gets boring, at least you'll enjoy some good arguments with her. Grab another slice of cake on your way.

>She walks to Twilight and Fluttershy, who were watching Angel play with the other fillies. He seems to be quite good at "Storm of Chaos".

Hey, what's up?

>You don't even bother to swallow before talking. Rarity glares at you, but you just smile her back, widely, showing her your frosting covered teeth. She looks away, seething out of outrage. But you saw the beggining of a smile on her mouth.

>"Actually, we were just about to call you. Would you mind to help bringing the presents here, outside?"

>"T-that is, is you're not doing... anything..."

>Look at your hands. Big mug o' cider on one, half munched slice on the other. You put the cake on your mouth and bolt it down, no chewing. You wash it down with the cider and toss the empty mug at Fluttershy.

Not anymore. Be right back.

>Between Big Mac, Whooves and you, the presents are quickly piled up under the oak, in front of a quite happy Angel. Almost everyone brought some kind of gift to the party, but the mane 6 and you really put effort onto yours.

>And your crate is the biggest one of the lot. And Rarity notices.

>"Size isn't all that matters"

It's not just big. it's also full of love.

"And the present is too. Bow-chicka-bow-wow!"

>"So now food is love?"

From where I come, we have a saying: "the quickest way to a man's heart is through his ...stomach."

>You feel a shiver running down your spine. Fluttershy is staring at you, still holding your mug.

>What, did you say something wrong? You curiously stare back at her until she suddenly blushes and brakes eye contact.

>Whatever...

>Angel's tearing through wrapping paper, throwing boring or unwanted gifts to another pile behind him. He's one fucking picky bastard, isn't he?

>"Looks like he's got some... refined tastes..."

>You notice poor Fluttershy, who's started hovering over the guests, mumbling apologies to the offended p0nies. You can help but smile at this strange situation. Looks like it's out of a cartoon.

That little spoiled bunny should have learnt something about kindness by know.

>"What? Are you worried about him tossing your precious carrots away?"

Actually, I'm more worried about you. I can't imagine how much it'll hurt when he tears your dress apart, thinking it's another layer of wrapping paper.

>She glares at you. That was a good one.

>"We'll see..." You smile, you can almost hear her grindig her teeth. "Look, that's my present"

>It is. Angel's holding a small, flat box covered in purple-striped white paper with suspicious eyes. He quickly ripps off the paper and opens the box.

>You glance at Rarity. She's completely focused on Angel, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.

>Angel's face is absoulutely expresionless. He slowly takes the dress out of the box and holds it in front of him. It is a little doll-sized pink fairy costume, with a pair of multicolored butterfly-like wings, apart from all the other accessories you helped Rarity buy.

>The whole thing sparks like an emo fake vampire under the sun. But he's not tossing it away. The first hint of doubt assaults you. He didn't took that long with the other rejects.

>"I think he likes it!" Rarity can barely contain her joy.

>Fuck, what if he does?

>Angel takes a whole minute to inspect the dress and its accessories. You're now sweating profusely. Rarity is giggling and nudging you nonstop.

>Finally, he put the costume back on its box, closes it... and throws it as far as he can, directly to a nearby creek.

>"Oh, my!" Fluttershy flies behind it, faster than you ever saw her fly before. But you don't know if she'll be able to catch it: that bunny has one heck of an arm.

>You do your best to not burst into laughter, but it's hard as hell. A little chuckle comes out when you look at Rarity.

>The white mare is sitting on the floor, one eye twitching and the mouth wide open. You can clearly see her uvula.

"Quickly, put me in! I'll finish before anyone knows what fucked her!"

>Instead of that, you bite your tongue and swallow to hold back a guffaw. You kneel besides her and gently pet her mane.

I won't say "I told you"... but I did.

>No reaction. God, that hit her hard. She really thought Angel was gonna like it.

>Fluttershy's back. She didn't catch it in time.

>"I'm just so, so sorry, Rarity! Angel is just nervous and he never really liked glitter and-"

>And right then, right there, she decides to drop the wet dress... directly on top on Rarity.

>You jump back to avoid getting splashed, but Rarity was still shocked, and it lands right on her head with a loud 'splat'.

>You don't really want to laugh anymore. Sure, you wanted to humiliate her with the bet and all that, but this is too much. Everypony is looking at Rarity as Fluttershy tries to dry her mane with some napkins.

>"Ohmygosh, I'm so so sorry! I didn't mean to drop it, it just was too slippery, and-"

>"Don't worry, dear" Rarity's speaking with a monotone voice. "It's not your fault. If you all excuse me, I'll go back home to tidy myself a bit."

>"Of course, I'll go help you. Oh, sweet Celestia, I'm really really sorry..."

 

>The party resumes after the two mares leave. Needless to say, Angel enjoyed your gift the most, spending most of the party swimming in carrots.

>You, on your part, got tied up in something a bit more hairy.

>You wandered around the party until you decided to go help Pinkie entertaining the kids. You were doing some 'fake' arm -hoof- wrestling with the CMC, when Applebloom started shouting.

>"Wow, Anon! Ya got some pretty stron leg there. Bet yar the strongest hoof wrestler around!"

>Not the smartest thing she could have said. Unless she said it to bother you, 'cause then, it worked like a charm.

>"Oh, is he, now?" Rainbow Dash approached you, with a daring look on her face. She sitted down on a table nearby and placed her hoof over it. "Prove it."

>Of course, as the man you were, you complied... And kicked her ass. Strong wings, maybe, but weak legs.

>Then it all escalated quickly.

>You're now wrestling Applejack, with a crowd of p0nies surrounding you and cheering you both. They're even placing bets. You asked Spike to bet all your bits on you.

>"It's a struggle for the ages! Anyp0ny could win! Bet you're last bits, mares and gentlecolts, this won't be lasting much longer!"

>Pinkie Pie had appointed herself as referee, commentator, and apparently, bet runner. And she's doing great.

>Back to the wrestle. Applejack's strong: most likely the strongest pony you faced yet. But she's not an ape used to lift weights with her upper limbs.

>"And she's down! Anon wins again!"

>You down your mug and shout to celebrate your victory. You are a bit tipsy but you don't care. You're enjoying this. Applejack congratulates you and leaves the table, her dignity still standing.

>Pinkie jumps on the table and shouts through a cone made with a card platter from some cake. Still has frosting on it.

>"Is anypony else willing to test its strength against Anonymous the Human and his Steel Five?"

>"Eeee-yup."

Oh, crap.

>The crowd opens, revealing Big Macintosh.

>"A new challenger aproaches! Place you bets now, everyp0ny!"

>Holy shit, he's big. The table creaks when he places his hoof on it. You wrap your fingers around it.

>Fuck, it's twice as big as your fist.

>"Are both contestants ready?"

I'm completely sure about this...

>He nods.

>"Then... GO!"

>Oh-shit,oh-shit,oh-shit, he's strong. Ridiculously strong. You do your best to fight him, but he's pulling you back. Slowly but steadily.

>Your arms hurts as fuck. Your eyes sting from the sweat dripping from your forehead, but you're too busy to wipe it off. You can feel cramps building up on your neck and back.

>And he's still pushing you back. His face is flat as always, but you can see sweat on his forehead too.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck-

>Your hand is now milimiters away from the table. Time seems to slow down.

>You're gonna lose. It's a fact. You're gonna lose your bits, you're gonna be ashamed in front of everyone and you're probably gonna spend the rest of the week with your arm in a sling.

>Fear and despair threaten to overwhelm you. You don't wanna end it like this. You don't-

>You feel a fiery sting on your thumb.

"The fuck you're doing, pussy? Are you gonna get your ass handed to you by a freakin' horse? C'mon, we're better than that!"

Fuck off, you don't have any say in this. I'm not trying to fuck him.

"Of course I do. We're on this together. We're pals, ain't we?"

Look, I'm a bit busy for that 'buddy-buddy' bullshit of yours. What do you want?

"Okay, how about this? If you beat him, you'd have beaten the strongest guy around. You'll become the Alpha male! All the bitches shall get wet at my sight!"

It doesn't work that way.

"Look, you wanna beat him or not?"

>You think about it for a moment. Good thing adrenaline gives you time to think... Okay, let's do it.

"Gooood. Leave it all to me."

>Woah, that feels GOOD. Your arms don't hurt anymore, you cramps are fading away. You can do this.

>You grin as Big Mac frowns. From the brink of defeat, you rise again, your hand and his hoof with you.

>You slowly push him back, as he starts to panic. The whole crowd -even Pinkie- holds its collective breath as you finally push him against the table with a quiet knock.

>What you did was physically impossible. But you fucking did it. The usually immutable Macintosh is now gaping at your deed, his eyes widely open in surprise. Everyp0ny is mute from surprise. Well, almost everyp0ny.

>"Anon wins again! We have a new champion, P0nyville."

"YEAH! I'M THE FUCKING BOSS! KNEEL BEFORE ME, BITCHES!"

>You ponder about what happened as the p0nies burst into cheers and laughters. How the fuck did you do that?

"Dunno. Dick magic?"

>More likely testosterone. Anyway, let's enjoy the victory.

>The audience calms down as Big Mac stands up. A tense silence grows between you. Fuck, you should have checked if he was a sore loser before making him eat the dust.

>After what feels as hours, he smiles and reaches you a hoof.

>"Good leg."

>You sigh, reliefed. You smile him back, and shake his hoof.

Thanks. You're not half bad either.

"Now! Stick a fork in his eye, and our victory shall be complete!"

>Fuck you, now we're bros. You earned his respect. You can see it in his eyes.

>A while after the improvised hoof wrestling... tournament? the sun begins to set and the party starts dying away.  

>The kids, after hours of playing and laughing and running and shouting, are tired and sleepy. Some adults are starting to herd them in reluctant yawning packs back home.

>You see Macintosh pushing the CMC back to the Apple Farm. My god, they're still talking. You don't envy Big Mac if he's gonna watch over one of their infamous sleepovers.

>Suddenly, the red colt stops and looks back at you. His face is as unreadable as always, but his stance is more serious than usual.

>He stares at you. Then looks away. You follow his gaze: he's looking at Applejack. Then he looks back at you and nods.

>Confused, you nod him back. As he walks again, you ask yourself what the hell was that about. Was he giving you his permission to...?

>You stare at his sister for a while. Big Mac misunderstood your intentions, of course. But now that you think about it...

>Anyway, the kids are gone. Time to start phase two.

 

"DIS IS DA BEST PARTY EVAAAAAAAAAAR!"

>For once, you agree with him.

>The p0nies have placed some disco lights on the oak's branches and Vinyl is letting herself loose on the DJ booze. Under the tree there's now an improvised dance floor.

>And it's packed full of mares suffering varied degrees of alcoholic poisoning. All of them grindig against the nearest male they can find.

"GODHGAGHGHAHGGHGHAAGHAGHAGHAGAGAGAHHGA- I'm in Heaven!"

>At your front, Lyra and Flitter are 'dancing' against you. Lyra's not even bothering to follow the beat. You're not sure who's behind you, it may be Carrot Top or Berry Punch: the lighting is quite bad.

"GRIND HARDER, SLUTS! THE PENIS COMMANDS YOU!"

>Actually, you had enough. You're hot and tired. You could use a drink and a chair.

"WHAT! C'mon, don't do this to me! Lyra was just about to-"

>Don't care. Let's go get some fresh air.

"...I hate you."

>You know he doesn't mean it. You had too many good times together.

>You push your way out of the dance floor. It may have just been your imagination, but you think you heard Lyra shouting from frustration. Well, that's flattering.

>Mrs. Cake left the party earlier to take her fillies back home, but Mr. Cake stayed and took over the drinks stand. Him and his impossible coloured cocktails are the sole reason for the general inebriaton state of most of the guests.

>"Hey, it's the new champion! What do you want, human?"

Dunno... Surprise me.

 

>You don't know what to think about the sparkling, bright rainbow colored beberage you got. But it sure surprised you.

>With the tall, bubbling glass cautiosly held on one hand you look for your friends among the tables disposed around the oak. Most of them have candles, but it's still quite dark.

>You manage to spot Twilight. She may not be the most charming one of the lot, but you feel a bit bad seeing her alone in a party. Besides, you have something to ask her.

>You walk to her. She's humming to herself, slightly nodding her head back and forth, with a mug on a hoof. She doesn't even notice you.

Hey, Twi. Why u no dancing?

>She looks up to you and a wide smile slowly appears on her face. Yep, she's drunk. Perfect, you don't want her too perceptive right now.

>"Anon! Come, sit down." You comply. "I'm not really too much into dancing, if you know what I mean." Tight crowds and loud noises are just not my thing."

So, you've been sitting here? Alone?

>She shakes a hoof, playing it down.

>"Oh, it's not that bad. Pinkie Pie and the others come to check on me from time to time. And if it really gets boring, I just read."

>You didn't notice it first, probably because the terrible lighting, but there's an open book on the table. Fuck, it must be hard to read in this gloom.

Well, suffer no more, for I have arrived. I have something to ask you about.

>That caught her attention. Now, let's thread carefully.

I just want to know more about magic. Where does it come from, for example.

>She almost starts beaming and hurls you both into a long, detailed account of everything anyone ever once knew about magic. You try to keep up, making yourself sure you get most of what she's saying and looking for a way to focus her on the origin of magic powers and the nature of magical arctifacts.

>Your head hurts as fuck. You'd have prefered to arm wrestle Big Mac again. But you have to do this. You can't face Sombra blindly.

 

>That was fucking hard to bear, but you managed to get most of it.

>Basically, yes, there has been some 'non magic' creatures in the past -mostly earth p0nies and pegasus- who learnt to use magic. No one really knows why, maybe continued exposure to magic, but anyway their power was notoriously inferior to that of unicorns and alicorns.

>And yes, there are and have been plenty of magical arctifacts through Equestrian history. But no one ever had awareness of itself. There are known attemps of magical soul or mind imprisonments in objects, but no unicorn ever succeeded.

>So, Sombra's horn is the first being of its kind and most probably you won't get much reward for keeping it in your locker. Great.

>Twilight doesn't notice your mood, she's too absorbed in the tale of Starswirl the Bearded and all the 1.234.567 spells he invented and/or discovered in his life.

>You almost squee from relief when Pinkie Pie.

>"Hey, what are you guys doing over there?"

"PLEASE, MAKE HER STOP! I'LL DO ANYTHING! SPECIALLY SEX THINGS!"

Just talking. Twilight was just explaining to me how magic works and all that stuff.

>Pinkie smirks at you and Fluttershy glares at Twilight. Looks like they know what you've just been through.

>"Yeeaaah, that sounds great. But you've got to come with us. We're about to start a Limbo competition!"

>"I don't know... I'm not really into-"

C'mon, Twi, you can't stay the rest of the party here, in the dark! Come, it'll be fun. I promise.

>She looks at you. You were almost sure she's going to refuse, but something sparks in her eyes.

>"Okay, Anon. If you say so..."

>Pinkie pie yays as the unicorn closes the book and stands up. Oddly, Fluttershy is still glaring at Twilight. Before leaving you remember your drink. You haven't even tasted yet, so you take a sip. Immediatly, your world fades into a whirlwind of colours.

 

>Hours later...

>You're laying on a bush on a grove near the cottage. You barely remember anything form the party after tasting the rainbow, but, judging from the silence coming from the dance floor, you guess it's already phase three: wasted phase.

>You've been staring at the stars for the last twenty minutes or so. The surprisingly comfortable bush and whatever that shit had in it made you perceptive to the beauty of the night sky.

Fuck Celestia, she's a lazy bitch. Luna's sky's so much better.

"Why not fuck'em both?"

>There's him again. Frankly, you haven't heard him in a while. You realize you have missed him.

"Oh, for fuck's sake, don't get drunk-emotional with me now."

>You think about him, about how close he is to you. Spiritually. He may be a heartless bastard, but, under all his urges and rudeness, you know he truly understands you.

You know... I think you've earned yourself a name.

"...wot?"

What do you think offff... Trevor? ...Yeah, it fits you. You sound like a Trevor.

"Go home Anon, you're drunk. Besides, why the fuck do I need a name for?"

>Ignore him. You solemnly raise a hand and point at your crotch with your index and middle fingers.

By the power invested in me by no other than myself, I hereby name thee Trevor Dick, the Penis.

"...you done yet? Coz I don't see how this bullshit is gonna help me get into some bit-"

>"Oh, hai, Anon! Who'r ya talking to?"

>Applejack and Rainbow Dash. By the way they're wobbling to and fro, you'd say they're quite drunk. Or maybe it's your eyes who are drunk.

Trevor, mah dick. I just named him.

>You're pretty much a tactless honest bastard when you're drunk. They don't seem to be offended but they exchange an conspiratorial look. Dash smiles and approches you. She's so close you'd lick her snout if you stick your tongue out.

>"Well, Anon, we were just thinking you and... 'Trevor' look so lonely... Maybe you'd appreciate some... company."

"...you gotta be kidding me..."

Sure, why not?

>You're fucking dense when you're drunk. You don't get what she meant until she starts unzipping your pants.

Woah!

"SAY HELLO TO DADDY, LITTLE BITCHES!"

>"Oh, 'Trevor'! You're even bigger than I expected."

>"Told ya Rarity wasn't lying! Ah always know when somepony's lying."

>That doesn't sound right.

...wait, what did Ra-

>Applejack's tongue in your mouth interrupts you. When did she get so close?

>Oh, crap, that feels goooood. Too good. You're mind was too fucked up by the rainbow to handle a surprise trio like this. You can feel your conscience fading away...

"You fuck, don't even dare to leave like this! Hey! Come back!"

 

Main processing unit stability compromised. Shutting down.

"Yeah, tell me about it"

Searching secondary processor...

"...wot?"

Secondary processor found. Loading TrevorDick.exe.

"THAT'S ME! FUCK YEAH, GIVE IT TO PAPA!"

TrevorDick loaded. Rebooting all sistems.

 

>You are now Trevor. And you've got some mares to fuck.

>First, hands on Dash's hip. She's only been rubbing herself against you, and that's enough -for now.

>But she's far too slow. You'll help her pick up the pace.

>Second, Applejack. You warp your tongue around hers and invade her mouth. She opens her eyes in surprise.

>Dash just got the idea and is shacking her hips wildly. You're crotch gets soaking wet as her moans grow louder and louder. You can clearly feel every single crook on her insides.

>Applejack seems quite pleased with your tongue, but you better check it. You move a hand from Dash's hip and place it on Applejack's crotch and massage it. Yep, there's a flood down there.

>As if that wasn't enough proof of your sexual mastery, Dash arches her back and shouts to the air.

>"Oh, Trevor! You are the greatest, bestest, more awesome dick I ever rode!"

>Somehow, you get even harder when you hear your name. You smile as you feel the pleasure building up at a good speed.

NAMES ARE AWESOME

>You know they must have had several orgasms by now. P0nies don't last that long, but at least they didn't stop.

>In fact, you're not that far from the climax yourself. Time to crank it up.

>You start pumping with your own hips, digging your penis even more into Dash's pussy and stick three fingers into Applejack's.

>Now they're really horny.

>Applejack's broken the kiss to breathe and she's moaning even louder than Dash. She's almost laying on your arm, and pressing your hand against har with both her upper hooves.

>Rainbow Dash is rubbing against you like a crazy mare. If it weren't so wet, you'd fear your crotch could catch on fire. You also notice her wings are fully extended and pulsate as she moves.

>The pegasus is lighter than you imagined. Perhaps you could test on her some of the techinqus you discarded as physically impossible back on Earth...

>But first things first. You'll have to finish this before moving on. Luckily, not even you can endure this much longer.

>Almost there, ALMOST THERE...

>Something big and heavy rolls over you, pushing both mares away from you.

"YOU FUCKING COCKBLOCKER!"

Major threat detected. Rebooting main OS.

"WHAT?"

Main OS loaded. Executing Anonymous.exe.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo- I was so close...."

 

>You are Anonymous. And you don't know why your crotch is so wet. Fuck, did you piss yourself?

"FUCKSHITCUNTBITCHCRAPWHORE-"

>Woah, now that's a raging boner. You easily block the flood of swears coming from Trevor, trying to remember what happened.

>You hear some noise and look for what's causing it.  It's Applejack and Rainbow Dash, just a few meters from you. Applejack's laying face up, snoring like a bull. Dash's lazily wrestling with what appears to be an empty cider keg.

>"Anon? Are you okay?"

...Flutters?

"-KING COCKBLOCKER SLU-"

>Goddammit, your head hurts as fuck.

Wot da heck happen'd 'ere?

>Fluttershy flies to you and helps you get up.

>"Those two were just playing some nasty prank on you when you were sleeping. But don't worry, I took them off of you."  

"-OU LYING PIE-"

>She gently guides you to a nearby tree and you sit down.

Wel, t'en, thanks Flutters. Looks lik Ah relly need'd...

>You shut up. She's staring at you intensely, obviously nervous. She opens and closes her mouth several times, taking deep breaths. Until she finally says it.

>"Iloveyou!"

"-UT A CACTUS UP YO-"

Sure. Ah luv u too.

>She gasps, covering her mouth with both hooves. You're still too drunk and dizzy to realize.

U'r da best o' mah frens. U'v olways been ther when Ah need'd u. And Ah relly apresh-apprais-apreciat it.

>She winces, her wide-open eyes tearing up.

>Wait, what's wrong with her? What did you say-

>Through the thick cloud of alcohol covering your brain, you begin to understand.

>Of course. Now you get it, you fucking dense piece of shit. You desperately look for a follow up, a way to apologize.

>But she recovers faster than you thought. She wipes her tears and gives you a determined gaze.

>"I'm afraid that's not enough, Anon."

Look, Fluttershy, I'm sorry, I didn't unders- HOLY CRAP!

>She places a hoof on Trevor, who's still erect and raging.

"-ON'T EVEN DARE TO TOUC-"

>"I'll make it crystal-clear, then."

>Then she engulfs you whole member with his mouth.

"-FILTHY-Wow, okay I forgive you."

>Fuck, she's good!

>She's now pistoning her head up and down on Trevor. He's enjoying it wholeheartedly.

"I FORGIVE YOU MY CHILD! SUCK ON ME HARDER!"

>And you're not exactly having the worst time of your life.

>Fluttershy's doing her best to make you feel as good as possible. Her tongue's slowly caresses your gland as she uses the entrance of her throat to squeeze the tip.

>You notice she's not stopping to breathe. She's breathing through her nose so you -and Trevor- can get no breaks.

>Surprisingly enough, she clearly knows how to do a proper blowjob.

>Suddenly, she changes the pace. Now she's deepthroating you.

"OHGODYEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!"

>She's a fucking fellatio goddess! You can't get why her cutie mark is some butterflies and not a-

>You look at her. She's crying, her eyes shut tight in pain. Obviously, this is more than a bit uncomfortable for her.

>Then, you remember how you met.

>The time you spend together taking care of her animals.

>Her shy and blushing face.

>You remember your friendship.

>She may love you. She may want to deepthroat you.

>But you can't do this.

>You place you hands on her head.

"NO! DON'T YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!"

>You pull her head off Trevor.

"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

>"What's the matter?" She coughs. "Did you not like it?"

It was wonderful. But I don't want it, Fluttershy. I don't love you the way you love me. I'm just... I'm sorry.

>She starts crying again. You hug her and let her cry as much as she needs.

>A couple of minutes later, she brakes the hug. She's now only sobbing.

>"It doesn't matter. Don't worry about it. You'll love me, sooner or later, once we get to know eachother better."

>She places a hoof on your cheek and smiles. It's a heartbreaking smile.

Fluttershy, I don't-

>But she flies away before you can finish. You're sure she was crying again.

>You wish you could repay her her love, but that would just be a lie. You several minutes time thinking about a solution.

"...I'm still mad at you"

Oh, don't be like that, Trevor, you know I had to do it. How about a little trip with miss Righty?

"...fine"

>And there you are, jerking off under a tree on a colorfull p0ny-filled land as the sun begins to rise.

>You cum, and you feel yourself falling asleep almost immediatly. It's been a fucking long day...

"Still worth it."