Return to Sender (sad)

>Day went wrong in Equestria.

>Wake up.

>Yawn.

>Stretch.

>Laze out of bed and head to the kitchen of your small home.

>Pour yourself a bowl of Gener-Oats.

>Chew away lazily and start to daydream.

>It's been about a month since you arrived here in this little girl's wet dream.

>Sheesh, there are p0nies everywhere.

>They run everything from the marketplace to the government.

>Oh well. It's not all bad.

>At least they're generous.

>That you even have a place to sleep and food to eat is testament to that fact.

>You showed up one day, seemingly out of nowhere, the only human in this land of pastel.

>No bits, no memory, no friends.

>You're disturbed from your thoughts by a knocking at your door.

>Well, there was one "friend" that you made...

>Completely involuntarily, you might add.

>You sigh and leave your miserable excuse for a breakfast on the table.

>Answer the door.

Look Fluttershy, I appreciate you coming to see me every morn-

>Looking up, you notice, not Fluttershy, but a grey mare with a long blonde mane and deep golden eyes.

>She's hovering about a foot off the ground, a dark brown bag slung across her neck.

>You can see that the bag has a small letter-shaped button on it for fastening it shut.

>So this is how they deliver mail? How quaint.

>She's rifling through some letters with her hooves.

>How they do that, you'll never know.

>Maybe it's like sticky microfibers or something...

>You shake your head. Too much Spiderman lately.

>She's yet to look up. "Anon, right?"

>You smile.

That's me.

>She looks up to hand you the letters and you notice her visibly jolt.

>She hadn't realized who she was talking to, you guess.

>You catch her cheeks tint rosy red.

 

>She drops a letter and starts to stammer.

>"I-I... I'm sorry..." She lands on the ground in front of your door and scrambles to pick up your dropped letter.

>"I didn't mean t-to look so..." In her panic, she ends up spilling her opened bag of letters, and some pasta, into your doorway and home.

>She sighs and hangs her head. "Flustered..."

>You try to suppress your growing rumble of laughter, but fail.

>You begin to chuckle.

>The mailmare pouts at first, but soon is unable to contain her own giggle fit.

>After the two of you calm down, you smile and kneel to begin helping her re-collect the scattered mail.

>"Oh, Mr. Anon, you don't have to do anything. This is my fault... Like always..." She looks down at her hooves, dejected.

>That last comment strikes a chord in your heartstrings. You feel sorry for her, but your smile never wavers.

Nonsense, I don't mind at all, Mrs...

>"Ditzy. Ditzy Doo. And it's Miss, not Mrs..."

>She looks up at you, eyes half hidden behind her mane, but still focused on yours.

>You see her cheeks flash red again and she looks away.

>You can't help but smile and chuckle again.

Ditzy huh?

>You catch a glimpse of her cutie mark as she returns to scooping up letters.

>A series of soap bubbles run up her flank.

>Airheaded, huh?

>You smile again to yourself and begin collecting the spilled post as well.

>Soon, all but one letter has been returned to her mail bag.

>You absent-mindedly reach out to pick it up.

>You feel a soft, warm sensation brush along the palm of your hand.

>Looking down, you see that it's Ditzy's hoof.

>You look back up, your eyes meet again.

>You get lost in her eyes for what seems like minutes.

>You both blush and pull your limbs back.

>"Well, better go!" And with that, Ditzy darts off towards town.

 

>Well, that was rather... sudden...

>You look down.

>The letter you two had played handsies over lays face-down on your floor.

>You pick it up and set it on an end table near your front door.

>Guess she'll be back for that at some point.

>You just grin and close the door.

>You wonder if Ditzy will be too embarrassed to deliver your mail in-perso- or rather, in-p0ny anymore...

>It'd be a shame if she just started using the mail slot.

>After all, it was nice meeting another living thing that was a bigger pasta buffet than you.

>Wait... Didn't you just say that your door had a mail slot?

>Then why didn't she-?

>You just shake your head.

Oh Ditzy...

>Well, now that the morning entertainment was over...

>You finally take the time to look at the letters she delivered, shuffling them around in your hand.

>Bill. Next. Bill. Next. Bill.

>Same shit, different world.

>This one's actually a letter.

>From Fluttershy...

>It smells like honey and pet food.

>You feel your brows furrow.

>You sigh and open it.

>"Dear Anon, Wanna fuck?"

>"-Love, Fluttershy"

>You groan and toss the letter in the trashcan.

>There's another knocking at your door.

>You reach over, pick up the letter Ditzy left behind, and open the door.

Oh good. Back for your letter, Ditz-

>You really never get the chance to finish your sentences...

>"O-Oh. Umm... H-Hi, Anon." squeaks the yellow p0ny at your doorstep. "Did you get my l-letter?"

Yes. I got it, Fluttershy.

>She squees and her teal eyes light up. "D-Does that mean?"

No, Fluttershy. I don't "wanna fuck." And I'd appreciate it if you'd stop asking.

>"Oh. Okay..." She hides behind her mane and looks down at the ground.

>Maybe she finally understands now.

>"B-But I'm not giving up, m-mister." She turns and trots away.

>You facepalm and walk back inside.

 

>The next day.

>Wake up.

>Same morning routine, you don't like change much.

>Right around the same time as yesterday, there's a knock on your door.

>You grin, eager to see Ditzy again.

>Open the door.

Hey, you left a letter here yester-

>It's...

>Actually Ditzy, holy shit.

-day...

>She looks at you, a little puzzled at your pause in speech, and giggles.

>You hoof her back the letter in question and she stuffs it into her bag.

>She rummages through it and produces a pile of post.

>She starts combing through letters. "Hmm.. Anon... Anon..."

I wonder what joys the mail will bring today.

>You smile and attempt to lean against your door frame, but misjudge the distance.

>You lose your balance and flail your arms wildly in order to regain it.

>You pant from your mini heart-attack and try again.

>Ditzy giggles again and goes back to searching for your name.

>That's what you get for trying to be suave.

>You grin.

>Oh well, at least you share your spaghetti.

>As you watch Ditzy fumble through the mass of letters, you can't help but take note of the way her mane wafts gently from side to side.

>A light breeze blows by, ruffling it elegantly, and you catch a passing scent of straw.

>This p0ny actually looks pretty cute when you think about it...

>Snap out of it, she's a horse, man.

So... uh... how's the delivery business?

>You cringe at the awkwardness of your own words.

>Ditzy picks up on your nervousness and just grins. "It's a living. But it IS pretty nice getting to see the different parts of P0nyville each day."

>You just nod.

>Ditzy stops flipping through her pile. "Oops, nothing for you today. My mistake."

>She throws the rest of the letters back in her bag and flies off.

>But not before giving you a sultry wink.

>Immediately followed by somehow tripping in the air...

 

>The next few days follow largely the same formula:

>You wake up and have just enough time for breakfast.

>Ditzy shows up, "accidentally" forgetting that you didn't actually have any mail that day.

>You make awkward small talk, and mop up the results with garlic bread.

>Fluttershy would show up, say or do something stupid, and you'd shove the garlic bread down her throat and send her on her way.

>As much as you didn't want to admit it, you were growing fond of the little grey pegasus.

>And you knew there was a spark.

>After all, she'd come out of her way just to see you each day.

>That settles it. Today you were going to make your move.

>Wake up, eat, wait.

>And wait. And wait. And wait.

>Start to sweat and go into hot flashes.

>Oh God. What if she doesn't come today?

>What if she doesn't actually like you?

>What if you were just deluding yourself?

>WhatIfYouGotYourHeartBrokenByAP0ny?

>Check the clock in your kitchen.

>It's been one whole minute.

>You're overreacting, you asshole.

>Take a few breaths to calm down.

>A knock on your door brings your heart back to rapid-fire.

>Oh God, she's here...

>Open the door.

>She looks as beautiful as ever.

>"Hi, Anon." she smiles and hovers in your doorway.

>You've long since passed the stage of her pretending to shuffle through mail.

Hey Ditzy...

>You gulp.

>Why were you so nervous?

I know you're p-probably pretty busy, but...

>You clench your fists, sweat beading along your brow.

>Come on, you can do this.

>She likes you.

>Do it man.

Would you like to c-come in for a minute?

>You clamp your eyes shut, draw your arms to your sides stiffly, and move to the side to allow her in.

>What feels like eons pass.

>You venture to open an eye questioningly.

>"I thought you'd never ask!" Ditzy smirks and presses her lips to yours.

 

>Your eyes open wide in disbelief but soon relax.

>Her lips are flat and warm against yours.

>She presses her forehooves into your chest and your feel your back push into the door.

>You grab a hold of her barrel and pull her closer, holding her to your heart.

>Her back legs wrap around your waist and her wings tuck in.

>Her tail brushes against your legs, sending shivers across your body.

>You grab hold of her flanks and trace her cutie marks with your thumbs.

>This elicits a loud moan from Ditzy and she tosses her bag across the room with her wing.

>She looks at you with a fire in her eyes. "I want you, Anon! Take me!"

>She forces your lips together once more, this time sending her tongue to explore the inner workings of your mouth.

>If you had any reservations about becoming a horsefucker before, now they were as gone as the blood from anywhere in your body but your dick.

>You carry Ditzy inside, slam the door with your foot, and lock it.

>You toss Ditzy on your couch and start ripping your pants off.

>She lands, ready to pounce, licking her lips.

>As soon as your pants and boxers come off, she leaps, tackling you to the couch.

>She immediately wraps her mouth around your member and plunges herself deep down onto it.

>The sensation is vaguely familiar, but also completely new to you.

>Her throat feels slippery and squishy, giving little resistance as your rod burrows into her mouth.

>It feels like fucking marshmallow fluff.

>Not that you'd know, or anything...

>The combination of heavenly feelings and actual attention from a female is bringing you close to the edge.

Ditzy, I'm about to-

>"Cum inside! J-Jam it in!" she manages to command around your cock.

 

>Never have you heard such lovely words spoken before.

>You heed her instructions and thrust hard into her mouth.

>It feels amazing, like your dick is gliding on velvet.

>But it's not stopping...

>Your cock is simply driving straight through any resistance in her throat.

>Almost as if she were...

>Made of marshmallow...

>Oh fuck.

>Your momentum is too much to change after your split-second realization.

>You feel your dick careening hopelessly through her esophagus, and you fear you may pierce the back of her head.

>Your fears are put to rest when your member comes to a stop in what feels like...

>Semi-melted chocolate?

>Which you promptly coat in your seed.

>Terrified, you hazard a glance downward.

>Ditzy's body is tense and rigid.

>Her eyes have gone off in different directions, one up and one down.

>Her face is painted in an expression of shock.

>You cringe when you see where your boner has lodged itself.

>Judging by the angle you're at, you just poked her brain with Anon Jr.

>Oh fuck. Oh fuck.

>You slide out of Ditzy's mouth, a trail of cum following close behind.

>Her body seems to reset and her face glosses over in a dumbfounded bliss, eyes still off-kilter.

Ditzy, are you alright?

>"Derp."

>Wat?

Wat?

>"Wat?"

>Wat?

Wat?

>Her tongue pokes out of her mouth and she just stares blankly.

C'mon Ditzy, what's wrong? Talk to me.

>She strains to move her mouth. "I... I just don't know..."

>She just plops back down on your couch, confused.

>Tears start to form at the corners of your eyes, threatening to blur your vision.

Don't you worry, Ditzy...

>You scoop her up and nestle her into your chest.

I'll get you to the hospital right away...

 

>It's now weeks after the accident.

>The doctors said that Ditzy had severe brain trauma.

>Her frontal lobe was damaged, resulting in a loss of eye control and reasoning ability.

>Moreover, she'd been diagnosed with retrograde amnesia.

>She'd forgotten everything about the last two weeks of her life.

>Which meant, she had no idea who you were anymore.

>You were just some weird monkey the staff let into her room for some reason.

>You had tried to stay by her side as she recovered.

>You had tried to remind her of the little time you spent together.

>The passion that had been sparked between you.

>But she didn't understand.

>And soon, it became too painful to see her.

>To look into those pools of gold and to see that she saw nothing when looking at you.

>It broke your heart to lose her adoration.

>But it broke your spirit to lose her friendship.

>And it was all your fault.

>The more mean-spirited townsfolk started taking to calling her Derpy, a jest at her wall-eyes.

>She didn't take it badly, she seemed to be blissfully unaware of any malice in the world.

>But hearing her being called that cut you deep.

>It was all your fault.

>Luckily for her, she was able to get her job back at the post office.

>But you couldn't bear to see her face.

>It pained you too much.

>Never again did you answer her knocks at the door in the early mornings.

>But every day, you would watch your letters fall to the floor through your mail slot.

>And every day, they'd be stained with tears as you picked them up.