Title: [Classic FR] Warframe Blues Author: Etiquette Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/y6QJ8DPX First Edit: Friday 3rd of May 2013 03:45:19 PM CDT Last Edit: Friday 3rd of May 2013 03:45:19 PM CDT >Day why half the writefags haven’t written anything in Equestria. >Wake up. >Roll out of bed. >Boot up your magical computer that you had Twilight connect to the internet somehow. >She can’t send you back home, but she can magic up the internet. >Figures. >Whatever. >Log on to Warframe. >Fuse your mods and shit. >Literally shit. >Right there. In your pants. In front of your computer. >You don’t care. >All that matters is getting that Banshee frame. >Bitch can drop the BASS. >Knock at your door. >Ignore it. >Banshee is the only thing on your mind. >Knock at your bedroom window. >Don’t even turn to face it. >Banshee. >Knock on your temple. >Grumble half-heartedly. Mrmph... fuckin’... >”Umm... Anon...?” >Don’t respond. >”Are Banshee blueprints your fetish?” >Your dick is instantly hard and you shift your attention to the yellow intruder. You? Banshee? Have? >Fuck English. >You don’t need that shit right now. >”I can give you the parts if you give me yours.” >She tries futilely to wink seductively. >She’s so bad that she manages to wink both eyes at the same time. >AKA. She blinks... My... part...? >”I want you to r-rut me, mister.” No way harlot. >You turn back to your game session. >Wave 20 reward is... >Hellfire. >FUCK >Start to sweat and look back at ‘Shy who is waving her rump in your direction. >Almost gag. >Nope. >Stare at your reward screen. >But... Banshee... >Look back at Fluttershy. >Back at the screen. >Fluttershy. >Screen. Fuck it! Fine! Just this once.   >Thirty minutes and some manly tears later, you’re the proud owner of a Banshee Chassis Blueprint. Alright ‘Shy. Now how about the others? >”Nuh uh uh.” She waves a hoof. >”If you want me to put out, than you have to too.” >She licks her lips. >Oh god... >You can hear her lips moisten from across the room. >Both sets. >Retch. >Just close your eyes and think of Banshee...   >Another session later you find yourself heaving into your trash can. Alright ‘Shy. >You manage to speak between chunks. Cough up the parts. >She hands you something. >It’s... >Streamline. >Wut? >Your fury knows no bounds. What the fuck is this shit?! >”I don’t give out blueprints every time, mister. It’s random.” >You’re about to lunge for her neck. >”But I do have a high drop rate.” >She wiggles her flank. >So it’s come to this. >Either bang your rapist-turned-extortionist or grind through defense missions... >So instead of writing Flutterrape, you’re busy running Xini for the 10,000,000th time. >Because you’re sure as hell not going to get them >Fucking Fluttershy.