AiE Accountant Request

>Be Anon

>Reletively new resident to Equestria.

>Relative being... What?

>A couple of months maybe?

>You couldn't tell.

>All you remember is being in your car and hitting that tree, then you wound up in the outskirts ofthis little place called ponyville.

>You think you may be in a coma or dead at this point, but you're still suspicious.

>Especially with the, "When you die you go to a magical land filled with talking horses, griffons, and even dragons."

>Being an accountant on Earth, you often think rationally, and this just didn't add up.

>Add up

>Accountant

>You chuckle at your own joke for a short second while balancing some numbers for the Mayor of Ponyville, Mayor Mare.

>Shortly after arriving in ponyville you were approached by a small purple unicorn maybe half your height.

>She said her name was Twilight Sparkle.

>She spent the first few minutes of your encounter asking an unreasonable amount of questions and the next few mumbling something about "Princess Celestia."

>You assumed it was some sort of local ruler and your suspicions were later confirmed.

>After spending a few days in a small bed, inside of a library, inside of a tree you soon met Princess Celestia.

>She was an almost actual sized white horse with a horn, wings, and a flowing mane of pink, blue, and green.

>After a few reasonably spaced questions, you told her where you were from and how you arrived where you did.

>She didn't flinch like it was out of the ordinary.

>She just listened and smiled gently.

>After hearing what you had to say, she asked Twilight if it was okay for you to continue living in the library.

>The pony eagerly shook her head at the princess's request and agreed.

>Before Celestia left she asked if you had any skills that could help the local ponies.

>You told her you had a degree in accounting and she said

>"I think I have just the job for you."

>Ever since then, you've been living with Twilight and working the budget for ponyville in the town hall.

>Honestly it wasn't that far off from your job on Earth.

>You worked for a small corporation, balancing the budget mostly.

>A pretty drab life.

>Equestria, however, had adventure.

>Tales of thousand-year-old empires appearing out of nowhere and small flying creatures that replicated faster than rabbits tantalized your craving for adventure.

>In fact you'd seen a few exciting things yourself.

>There was that one time Pinkie Pie duplicated herself.

>But you were too busy with the budget to figure out what was going on while it was happening.

>But how about that time that blue unicorn came to town and challenged Twilight to a magic duel?

>No, wait, you were working on the budget then too...

>Now that you think about it, there hadn't been much excitement for you at all.

>For almost as long as you can remember since arriving here, you've been working on the budget.

>It doesn't seem logical to you, considering what little income the town has.

>In fact everything is pretty balanced up to this- hold on.

>What's this?

>There's an unusual amount of money in both the surveillance and miscellaneous budget.

>Why would a place like this need to keep surveillance on a bunch of peaceful citizens?

>You decide to ask Mayor Mare about it.

"Ms. Mare, could you come in here for a second?"

>She trots in with a smile.

>"Yes, Anon? Is something wrong?"

"Yes, there seems to be an abnormality in the surveillance and miscellaneous budgets."

>You show her the papers.

"Is this supposed to be happening or..?"

>She begins to look nervous behind her smile.

>"Oh! Yes! That. That's perfectly fine I assure you."

"What's it going to?"

>"Oh, you know. Just simple... surveilling and... miscellaneous government things."

>She begins to sweat as another sign of her nervousness.

>"Is there something else going on here?"

>You feel like you're on the edge of a major government conspiracy.

>She sighs.

>"I can trust you, right, Anonymous?"

"Of course"

>She walks over to the window and takes a deep breath.

>"There's been some... murders recently in our fair town, Anon."

"What?"

>"Yes, unfortunately, this is true. The serveillance budget has gone mostly to trying to catch the killer in the act, though our efforts thusfar have been unsuccessful. As for the miscellaneous budget..."

>She takes in another deep breath.

>"It's funds have gone mostly to keeping all evidence of it from the public."

>Bingo.

>Conspiracy.

"What? Why?"

>"Do you see these ponies, Anon?"

>You walk over to the window she's staring out of.

"Yeah."

>"Their society... Our society is one based on peace. Most common ponies, like the ones before you, can't handle any sort of danger without panicing. Mass panic is the last thing we need with a murderer running around. It's easy to pick one pony out of a crowd of many that are panicing."

"But Mayor, they have a right to know."

>"Anon, you have to understand. We're doing this for them."

>She sighs.

>"Look I know you don't understand, but it's the way it has to be."

"Well what if I tell them?"

>She turns to you with a surprised and angry look.

>"What?"

"You heard me. What if I tell them about the murders?"

>She drops her head in disappointment.

>"And here I was thinking I could trust you. Fine, what's it going to take to keep you quiet?"

>This was it.

>Your chance at excitement.

>Your chance for adventure!

>All within your grasp.

>All at a moral cost, though.

>The name of the game was blackmail.

>You'd never been one to encourage such an action, but, being formerly employed in the world of business, you were no stranger to the dirty tricks that keep pockets lined with cash and business running smoothly and uninterrupted by any whistleblowers or government agents.

>Though in some cases, such as this, a whistleblower was threatening to disassemble an establishment unless benefitted.

>And your benefit was almost anything you could desire.

>What you desired was simple.

>You'd always admired the Mayor's beauty and the complexity of her plot.

>Now it could be yours.

"Ok, then. I know what I want."

>"What?"

"You."

>She turns towards you with a raised eyebrow, unamused.

>"Excuse me?"

"You're an exceptional mare, Ms. Mayor. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a tad bit attracted to you."

>"Let me stop you right there, Anonymous. No."

>Aww.

>Rejection.

>Well, you tried.

>Too bad you were too afraid of her serious side to try to push it.

>"Name something realistic."

>You give it some time, taking your bland life into consideration, and come up with something you feel will deliver you the excitement you oh so craved.

"I want to help with the murder investigation."

>"Really?"

>She looks slightly surprised, but tries to keep the steely face she's put on.

>"Why?"

>You get down on her level and look her straight in the eye.

"Anything to get out of this office and stop crunching numbers."