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Zombie Apocalypse Shorts

By: Duke_Of_Derpy on Jun 1st, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 6.35 KB  |  hits: 168  |  expires: Never
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  1. >Day 20XX
  2. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  3. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  4. >Knock on the door
  5. >It's another human
  6. 'Name?'
  7. >'Aether'
  8. YOU DOOMED US ALL YOU GLORIOUS BASTARD!!!
  9.  
  10. >Day 20XX
  11. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  12. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  13. >Knock on the door
  14. >It's another human
  15. 'Name?'
  16. >'Anon Alighieri'
  17. >Fall down, crying in his arms
  18. 'Oh god, I missed yoooooooooooou......'
  19.  
  20. >Day 20XX
  21. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  22. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  23. >Knock on the door
  24. >It's another human
  25. 'Name?'
  26. >'TheScooter'
  27. 'Oh good. Thought you'd be here faster.'
  28.  
  29.     >Day 20XX
  30.     >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  31.     >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  32.     >Knock on the door
  33.     >It's another human
  34.     'Name?'
  35.     >'Brainhorn'
  36.     >You slowly shut the door on him.
  37.     >Weeks later, you find thousands of zombies raped
  38.  
  39. >Day 20XX
  40. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  41. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  42. >Knock on the door
  43. >It's another human
  44. 'Name?'
  45. >'Wuten'
  46. 'Your in charge of the food. I like spaghetti.'
  47.  
  48. >Day 20XX
  49. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  50. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  51. >Knock on the door
  52. >It's another human
  53. 'Name?'
  54. >'Betty Spaghetti'
  55. 'Oh, hey... I am sorry about the fight. There is some manga in the back.'
  56.  
  57. >Day 20XX
  58. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  59. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  60. >Knock on the door
  61. >It's another human
  62. 'Name?'
  63. >'Anone Moose'
  64. 'I AM NOT GIVING YOU A FUCKING T-SHIRT!!!'
  65.  
  66. >Day 20XX
  67. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  68. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  69. >Knock on the door
  70. >It's another human
  71. 'Name?'
  72. >'Pale Narrator.'
  73. 'Calm people down with your sexy voice'
  74.  
  75. >Day 20XX
  76. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  77. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  78. >Knock on the door
  79. >It's another human
  80. 'Name?'
  81. >'Atlas'
  82. 'Help Pale with your manly voice'
  83.  
  84.     >Day 20XX
  85.     >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  86.     >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  87.     >Knock on the door
  88.     >It's another human
  89.     'Name?'
  90.     >' Navarone'
  91.     'Let you 600K word story save you.'
  92.     >Kick him in the nuts
  93.  
  94. >Day 20XX
  95. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  96. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  97.  
  98. >Day 20XX
  99. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  100. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  101. >Knock on the door.
  102. >It's another human.
  103. 'Name?'
  104. >'Lulzies'
  105. 'Cool, just...don't go hitting on all the ponies.'
  106. >5 hours later
  107. >Lulzies has hit on most of the mares and some of the stallions.
  108. >You wanted to give him a chance...
  109. >...until he hit's on Octavia.
  110. 'Hey Lulzies?'
  111. >'Yeah?'
  112. >You stab your arm through is stomach.
  113. 'You know why killing you is like KFC?'
  114. >He chokes out a 'No'
  115. >You pull your arm out, tasting the blood on your hands.
  116. 'It's finger licking good.'
  117. [spoiler] >Send him to Nurse Redheart to get fixed up. [/spoiler]
  118. [spoiler] You're not a heartless cunt. [/spoiler]
  119. >Knock on the door
  120. >It's another human
  121. 'Name?'
  122. >' I'm *Heavy wet coughing*'
  123. 'Pardon?'
  124. >'Sorry, my name is *serious smokers cough*'
  125. 'Oh shit. Hey Phlegm. Have you tried cough syrup?'
  126.  
  127. >Day 20XX
  128. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  129. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  130. >Knock on the door
  131. >It's another human
  132. 'Name?'
  133. >'Brainhorn...again.'
  134. 'Okay, you can stay.'
  135. >He walks in
  136. 'STAY AWAY FROM DERPY!!!'
  137. >Brainhorn doesn't listen
  138. 'You know what? Knife'
  139. >Brainhorn down.....
  140.  
  141. >Day 20XX
  142. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  143. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  144. >Knock on the door
  145. >It's another human
  146. 'Name?'
  147. >'Chronicler'
  148. 'I thought I locked you in a hole...'
  149. >'Zombies got me out.'
  150. 'Fine.'
  151.  
  152. >Day 20XX
  153. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  154. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  155. >Knock on the door
  156. >It's another human
  157. 'Name?'
  158. >'Wiz-Anon'
  159. 'Fucking children....'
  160.  
  161. >Day 20XX
  162. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  163. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  164. >Knock on the door
  165. >It's another human
  166. 'Name?'
  167. >'Shermanator'
  168. 'Which one?'
  169.  
  170. >Day 20XX
  171. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  172. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  173. >Knock on the door
  174. >It's another human
  175. 'Name?'
  176. >'Kitty Pony'
  177. >You snap his neck.
  178. 'THERE! He's dead. I killed him. There is blood everywhere. Get the fuck over it!'
  179.  
  180. >Day 20XX
  181. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  182. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  183. >Knock on the door
  184. >It's another human
  185. 'Name?'
  186. >'DJ-Anonn'
  187. >Punch him in the face, before giving him a beer.
  188. 'You are a great writefag, but only I call me crazy.'
  189.  
  190.     >Day 20XX
  191.     >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  192.     >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  193.     >Knock on the door
  194.     >It's another human
  195.     'Name?'
  196.     >'Gadget'
  197.     >Let him in
  198.     >Follow him around humming "Inspector Gadget" song for hours.
  199.  
  200. >Day 20XX
  201. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  202. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  203. >Knock on the door
  204. >It's another human
  205. 'Name?'
  206. >Anonymous'
  207. 'BAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahheheheheh heh heh heh.....heh. No.'
  208.  
  209. >Day 20XX
  210. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  211. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  212. >Knock on the door
  213. >It's another human
  214. 'Name?'
  215. >' Sorcerer'
  216. 'Shouldn't you be fighting these things?'
  217.  
  218. >Day 20XX
  219. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  220. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  221. >Knock on the door
  222. >It's another human
  223. 'Name?'
  224. >'Miggy Migoroth'
  225. >look from left to right for any witnesses
  226. 'No-one...gooood'
  227. >Give him a hug
  228. 'I missed you'
  229.  
  230. >Day 20XX
  231. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  232. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  233. >Knock on the door
  234. >It's another human
  235. 'Name?'
  236. >'Brainhorn....'
  237. 'SERIOUSLY?! Look, i gave you a chance, and you raped Derpy.'
  238. >Feel a hand on your shoulder
  239. >It's TheScooter
  240. >S'I can look after him. I can vouch.'
  241. >You sigh, and step out the way.
  242. 'Anything happens, and you're both zombie food.'
  243. >As they walk away, you swear you hear something along the lines of "Double team", "Spitroast" and "Scootaloo"
  244.  
  245. >Day 20XX
  246. >Zombie Apocalypse has occurred in Equestria
  247. >You are the only Human who prepared for it
  248. >Knock on the door
  249. >It's another human
  250. 'Name?'
  251. >'RnR66'
  252. 'Tacos?'
  253. >'WOULD YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THAT!!!'
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