Title:           Thoughts of a madman
Author:          Domino_anon
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/ZMz9WvmW
First Edit:      Sunday 27th of July 2014 08:13:28 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Last edit on: Thursday 30th of June 2016 09:06:37 PM CDT

And now for something completely different.
Swift's thoughts:
 
"I wish I could fly."
"Why can't my whole finger fit in my nose?"
"Redtube.com isn't okay for work?"
"How many fingers can I fit in my nose?"
"Four hundred years ago I would have been dead."
"Fifty three sounds like misty pee."
"If I had a nickel for every time I had a nickel... Then I'd have one nickel."
"Jchallo is a cat."
"Domino's pizza is like Pizza Hut except it's not shit."
"I wonder why twelve is called a dozen."
"If there are sixty seconds in a minute, sixty minutes in an hour, why aren't there sixty hours in a day?"
"WHAT THE FUCK IS TIME?!"
"If I pump a balloon with helium, methane, and oxygen, would it still float?"
"Borderlands 2 is a pretty alright game."
"Fucking god damn niggers with their Beats and slang terms for things that don't need slang terms."
"What are banana chips?"
"I SHOULDER."
"Death threats is one letter away from Death treats."
"It's not gay to want to suck a futa's cock, right?"
"999 fags on my balls, 999 god damn fags... Cum in one, tell him he's done, got 998 fags on my balls..."
"Seriously though. Like seriously. Seriously man."
"Red ranger is the worst ranger. Pink ranger is where it's at."
"Poison ivy and sunburn on a dick is the worst thing to wish upon your enemy."