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Adventures of Aperture Anon -Chapter Two-

By: Codz on Sep 12th, 2012 | syntax: None | size: 8.26 KB | hits: 100 | expires: Never

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>You had no idea how long you were floating in that black void.
>As black as it was though, you could see your whole body.
>You just shifted through this blackened space for what seemed for eternity.
>FUCK YEAH
>You were alive! You survived that fucking gas.
>Alpha-male.
>Yet...you didn't know where you were. Alive but for what reason?
>You held your gun up.
>Not any gun. An Aperture Black Hol- Portal Gun.
>The fun you had with this thing...at least for the first two tests.
>Then you uhh...
>Shot that gas pipe...
>Deadly gas...
>Yeah.
>All that counts is that you were alive and intact.
>But the question that holds...how will you escape?
>You answer that question with the best answer possible.
>A long drawn out sigh.
>You didn't even know how you got here, besides the that odd portal.
"FUCK."
>It echoed the vast emptiness of the room.
>This was worse than death in some ways.
>Would you rather a quick death, or a slow one.
>You remember why you ended up here, why you tested that gun.
>You had nothing to lose. Why did you not want the money?
>Because you were tired of life. You could have at least enjoyed poverty with a motherfucking Portal Gun.
>But now you ruined the facility. The Portal Guns would never be found again.
>That means...
>Last portal gun here motherfucker!
>Aw shit, and you were going to die with it.
>Now you HAD to find a way out.
>You took a second to think about it.
>You know without the portal gun you wouldn't have been here.
>Oh gee thanks brain. I did not know that.
>Now how to fix the portal gun.
>You fixed things back home occasionally. Mostly the tv but still.
>And how did you fix the tv? With a very hard smack on the top.
>You glance at your portal gun.
"Sorry buddy."
>You lower your left hand and smack the surface of the gun.
>It takes a second, but the gun comes right back to life.
>Except you can't move the switch for color.
>Well again, you were going to die if you didn't try.
>You fire at the empty void ahead.
>A large white portal appeared.
>FREEDOM?
>FREEDOM.
>You try and rush towards it, but it's kind of hard to floating and all.
>You slowly approached the white portal, unable to see through the other side.
>You shouldn't go in.
>But this was your only shot.
>But it looks dangerous.
>Fuck you brain, I do what I want.
>You break on through to the other side.
(Feel free to play The Doors right now.)
>Instantly, you feel the restoration of gravity.
>Should that be a bad or good thing, you know not.
>You look down.
>It was a bad thing.
>You are in the air, soaring like you just don't care.
>Minus the soaring because you were fucking falling.
>And to top that off, the gun shut off once more.
>fuckmylife.avi
>Told you it was a bad idea.
>Fuck you Brain.
>Fuck you too man.
>CAUSE I'M FREEEEEEEE
>FREE FALLING
>You accepted death at this point.
>Something in the distance begins to take shape...
>Wings...yellow?
>Can't tell what it is from this far away. All you can tell is that it's coming towards you.
>Quickly.
>Well fuck you might as well get saved.
>The yellow blur of speed was barreling towards you.
>You glance down.
>It was getting pretty close, you might not mak-
>WAIT A FUCKING SECOND
>You look down again.
>Your shoes. Boots, rather.
>And you almost forgot that you were invincible to fall damage.
>The yellow...thing is rapidly approaching.
>You have an idea, but it's kind of cruel if it works.
>The blur is just about to catch you, when you scream for no reason.
"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH"
>The blur stops, dazed and confused.
>You're falling too fast to figure out what the damned thing was.
>Whatever, planned success.
>HERE COMES THE GROUND,
>LET ME HEAR THE SOUND.
>MY BOOTS OF INVINCIBILITY,
>WILL BE MY LIABILITY.
>Canthandletheserhymes.jpg
>And with that you land unscathed.
>You finally get a moment to gather your thoughts and surroundings.
>Looks...quaint.
>On the boundaries of some sort of forest, no civilization in view. You expect something though.
>As long as there was something coming to catch you (at least you thought) there was some form of life.
>Suddenly, not too far away, you hear crying.
>Well I guess there is life.
>You head in the direction of the sound.
>You creep around a couple trees to see some sort of...
>Horse! With...wings?
>Pegasus, that's it. Interesting.
>Aperture tried doing something like this once.
>I believe it became an enemy in a Final Fantasy game.
>Oh well this isn't a game...at least you think.
>Did this exist?
>That's not too important at this very moment. You kneel beside the pegasus.
>"I couldn't *sniff* save him....*sob*" shit she looks depressed.
>Wait, couldn't save...me?
>Wait a fucking minute it talks? That's something else.
>Priority right now was to calm this yellow and pink pegasus.
"Erm...it's okay?" smooth.
>She jumps 5 feet into the the air, flew into a bush then looks back out.
>Real good one.
>Oh brain welcome back.
>She slowly creeps out of the bush.
>"You...you can walk?" she seems baffled.
>A smile emerges on your face.
"I can do a lot of things."
>A smile comes to her face as well.
>Success!
>"Wow! How did you survive that fall? I have a friend who would love to know!" she seems excited.
>You ponder telling her about the boots.
"I guess I just landed correctly. I don't have invincible bones or anything."
>She squees. D'AWWWW
>"Do yo- do you mind coming back to my cottage for awhile? I'd love to learn all about you."
>Seems harmless enough.
"And what is your name?"
>"My name is Fluttershy."
"Aperture Anonymous at your service. Or at least, just Anon is fine."
>"Alright Anon. Let's get walking shall we?"
>Walking is for chumps without
>THE PORTAL GUN
>Oh shit did it-
>You flick the machine on. It begins to run just like before.
>Fuckyeah.png
>You look around.
"But Fluttershy..." you begin.
>"Yes A-Anon?"
"How far away is this cottage of yours?"
>You glance up and see a gathering of clouds far off in the distance.
>"Oh! Not too long of a walk. Maybe...30 minutes? I'm a little far from home. It's over...there!" she points towards where the clouds are.
>30 minutes? That's far too long.
>You glance around. You see a white wall of rocks to your left.
>You line up a shot.
>"A-Anon, what are y-you..." shes shuddering.
"Don't worry Fluttershy, it's harmless."
>You fire your blue portal at the wall of rocks.
>You look back to the clouds in the distance.
>If you could just...
>You fire an orange portal.
>...get the right...
>You fire again.
>...angle...
>You fire with vigor.
>You hear that sound, and you know you got it.
"Hey Fluttershy? Can you come here for a second?
>"S-sure." she walks over.
"What would you say about getting to your home within about 10 seconds?"
>"Th-that's impossible unless you were fast like Rainbow Dash..." she trails off.
"I can do it. Just trust me this one time?"
>She looks at you for a few moments.
>"O-okay I guess. As long as it's safe."
>You pick her up and cradle her like a baby.
>She lets out a resounding 'eep'.
>It was cute.
>No time for cute.
>What Brain?
>NO TIME FOR CUTE
>WHY?
>IT'S TIME FOR SCIENCE!
>You run at the portal, and jump through.
>You were not as high as before, but falling like usual.
>Fluttershy was scared.
>Y'know, for someone that fast and high, you think she wouldn't be.
>She's screaming, but it's not loud.
>You occasionally glance down, seeing the distance.
>When you got close, you braced Fluttershy in a hug like fashion.
>Boom, with a 10/10 landing you hit the ground.
>You let Fluttershy down gently.
>"O-O-oh my. We made it..." shes still a bit shaken up.
>Well yeah, that's what the power of Aper-
>You are cut off by being tackled into the ground.
>You shake your head and look at the attacker.
>A rainbow-maned pony, with a blue body. Wings detected.
>"HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" she asks with an air of excitement.
>"Oh! Rainbow Dash! T-this is An-"
>"It's okay Fluttershy, I was watching you two the whole time."
>Wait...she didn't come through the portal.
"You must be the fast one, correct?"
>"B-but not as fast as you got here! It's like you said..."
>You look confused.
"Erm Rainbow was it?"
>She looks at you.
"What DID I say again?"
>"Y-you said you'd get all the way here in-"
>You remember.
>You pop a shit-eating grin.
"Ten Seconds Flat."

create a new version of this paste RAW Paste Data

>You had no idea how long you were floating in that black void.
>As black as it was though, you could see your whole body.
>You just shifted through this blackened space for what seemed for eternity.

>FUCK YEAH
>You were alive! You survived that fucking gas.
>Alpha-male.
>Yet...you didn't know where you were. Alive but for what reason?
>You held your gun up.
>Not any gun. An Aperture Black Hol- Portal Gun.
>The fun you had with this thing...at least for the first two tests.
>Then you uhh...
>Shot that gas pipe...
>Deadly gas...
>Yeah.

>All that counts is that you were alive and intact.
>But the question that holds...how will you escape?
>You answer that question with the best answer possible.
>A long drawn out sigh.
>You didn't even know how you got here, besides the that odd portal.
"FUCK."
>It echoed the vast emptiness of the room.

>This was worse than death in some ways.
>Would you rather a quick death, or a slow one.
>You remember why you ended up here, why you tested that gun.
>You had nothing to lose. Why did you not want the money?
>Because you were tired of life. You could have at least enjoyed poverty with a motherfucking Portal Gun.
>But now you ruined the facility. The Portal Guns would never be found again.
>That means...

>Last portal gun here motherfucker!
>Aw shit, and you were going to die with it.
>Now you HAD to find a way out.
>You took a second to think about it.
>You know without the portal gun you wouldn't have been here.
>Oh gee thanks brain. I did not know that.

>Now how to fix the portal gun.
>You fixed things back home occasionally. Mostly the tv but still.
>And how did you fix the tv? With a very hard smack on the top.
>You glance at your portal gun.
"Sorry buddy."
>You lower your left hand and smack the surface of the gun.
>It takes a second, but the gun comes right back to life.
>Except you can't move the switch for color.
>Well again, you were going to die if you didn't try.
>You fire at the empty void ahead.

>A large white portal appeared.
>FREEDOM?
>FREEDOM.
>You try and rush towards it, but it's kind of hard to floating and all.
>You slowly approached the white portal, unable to see through the other side.
>You shouldn't go in.
>But this was your only shot.
>But it looks dangerous.
>Fuck you brain, I  do what I want.
>You break on through to the other side.
(Feel free to play The Doors right now.)

>Instantly, you feel the restoration of gravity.
>Should that be a bad or good thing, you know not.
>You look down.
>It was a bad thing.
>You are in the air, soaring like you just don't care.
>Minus the soaring because you were fucking falling.
>And to top that off, the gun shut off once more.
>fuckmylife.avi

>Told you it was a bad idea.
>Fuck you Brain.
>Fuck you too man.

>CAUSE I'M FREEEEEEEE
>FREE FALLING
>You accepted death at this point.
>Something in the distance begins to take shape...
>Wings...yellow?
>Can't tell what it is from this far away. All you can tell is that it's coming towards you.
>Quickly.
>Well fuck you might as well get saved.

>The yellow blur of speed was barreling towards you.
>You glance down.
>It was getting pretty close, you might not mak-
>WAIT A FUCKING SECOND
>You look down again.
>Your shoes. Boots, rather.
>And you almost forgot that you were invincible to fall damage.

>The yellow...thing is rapidly approaching.
>You have an idea, but it's kind of cruel if it works.
>The blur is just about to catch you, when you scream for no reason.
"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH"
>The blur stops, dazed and confused.
>You're falling too fast to figure out what the damned thing was.
>Whatever, planned success.
>HERE COMES THE GROUND,
>LET ME HEAR THE SOUND.
>MY BOOTS OF INVINCIBILITY,
>WILL BE MY LIABILITY.
>Canthandletheserhymes.jpg
>And with that you land unscathed.

>You finally get a moment to gather your thoughts and surroundings.
>Looks...quaint.
>On the boundaries of some sort of forest, no civilization in view. You expect something though.
>As long as there was something coming to catch you (at least you thought) there was some form of life.
>Suddenly, not too far away, you hear crying.
>Well I guess there is life.
>You head in the direction of the sound.

>You creep around a couple trees to see some sort of...
>Horse! With...wings?
>Pegasus, that's it. Interesting.
>Aperture tried doing something like this once.
>I believe it became an enemy in a Final Fantasy game.
>Oh well this isn't a game...at least you think.
>Did this exist?
>That's not too important at this very moment. You kneel beside the pegasus.
>"I couldn't *sniff* save him....*sob*" shit she looks depressed.
>Wait, couldn't save...me?

>Wait a fucking minute it talks? That's something else.
>Priority right now was to calm this yellow and pink pegasus.
"Erm...it's okay?" smooth.
>She jumps 5 feet into the the air, flew into a bush then looks back out.
>Real good one.
>Oh brain welcome back.
>She slowly creeps out of the bush.
>"You...you can walk?" she seems baffled.
>A smile emerges on your face.

"I can do a lot of things."
>A smile comes to her face as well.
>Success!
>"Wow! How did you survive that fall? I have a friend who would love to know!" she seems excited.
>You ponder telling her about the boots.
"I guess I just landed correctly. I don't have invincible bones or anything."
>She squees. D'AWWWW
>"Do yo- do you mind coming back to my cottage for awhile? I'd love to learn all about you."
>Seems harmless enough.
"And what is your name?"

>"My name is Fluttershy."
"Aperture Anonymous at your service. Or at least, just Anon is fine."
>"Alright Anon. Let's get walking shall we?"
>Walking is for chumps without
>THE PORTAL GUN
>Oh shit did it-
>You flick the machine on. It begins to run just like before.
>Fuckyeah.png

>You look around.
"But Fluttershy..." you begin.
>"Yes A-Anon?"
"How far away is this cottage of yours?"
>You glance up and see a gathering of clouds far off in the distance.
>"Oh! Not too long of a walk. Maybe...30 minutes? I'm a little far from home. It's over...there!" she points towards where the clouds are.
>30 minutes? That's far too long.
>You glance around. You see a white wall of rocks to your left.
>You line up a shot.
>"A-Anon, what are y-you..." shes shuddering.
"Don't worry Fluttershy, it's harmless."
>You fire your blue portal at the wall of rocks.

>You look back to the clouds in the distance.
>If you could just...
>You fire an orange portal.
>...get the right...
>You fire again.
>...angle...
>You fire with vigor.
>You hear that sound, and you know you got it.
"Hey Fluttershy? Can you come here for a second?
>"S-sure." she walks over.

"What would you say about getting to your home within about 10 seconds?"
>"Th-that's impossible unless you were fast like Rainbow Dash..." she trails off.
"I can do it. Just trust me this one time?"
>She looks at you for a few moments.
>"O-okay I guess. As long as it's safe."
>You pick her up and cradle her like a baby.
>She lets out a resounding 'eep'.
>It was cute.
>No time for cute.
>What Brain?
>NO TIME FOR CUTE
>WHY?
>IT'S TIME FOR SCIENCE!
>You run at the portal, and jump through.

>You were not as high as before, but falling like usual.
>Fluttershy was scared.
>Y'know, for someone that fast and high, you think she wouldn't be.
>She's screaming, but it's not loud.
>You occasionally glance down, seeing the distance.
>When you got close, you braced Fluttershy in a hug like fashion.
>Boom, with a 10/10 landing you hit the ground.

>You let Fluttershy down gently.
>"O-O-oh my. We made it..." shes still a bit shaken up.
>Well yeah, that's what the power of Aper-
>You are cut off by being tackled into the ground.
>You shake your head and look at the attacker.
>A rainbow-maned pony, with a blue body. Wings detected.
>"HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" she asks with an air of excitement.
>"Oh! Rainbow Dash! T-this is An-"
>"It's okay Fluttershy, I was watching you two the whole time."
>Wait...she didn't come through the portal.
"You must be the fast one, correct?"
>"B-but not as fast as you got here! It's like you said..."
>You look confused.

"Erm Rainbow was it?"
>She looks at you.
"What DID I say again?"
>"Y-you said you'd get all the way here in-"
>You remember.
>You pop a shit-eating grin.

"Ten Seconds Flat."

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