A night to remember: Part 3

>You are exhausted

>It's late afternoon, and the sun is hanging low in the sky

>Your stomach rumbles, and you realise you haven't had anything to eat yet today

>Perhaps it's for the best that you're heading back into town towards Sugarcube Corner

>At least you can get a bite to eat while you figure out where your bag went

>The farmlands on the outskirts of Ponyville are quickly left behind you as you wander slowly into town

>You kind of just want this day to be over

>But you still have to find the gems

>You've pieced together your 'adventure' last night as best you could, but you're still missing some vital bits of info

>Such as where you went after the celebration

>You hope the answers lie in the building you're making your way towards

>As you round a corner, the shop comes into view

>You brace yourself for the worst, knowing that whatever damage you wrought here is-

 

>Oh look, it's fine

>Mostly

>The front window is missing its pane

>But other than that, it looks okay

>Your imagined worst case scenario hasn't come to fruition

>You were definitely inside last night though

>Maybe the inside will be worse

>You walk through the open door, knocking

"Hello?"

>There doesn't seem to be anyone behind the counter

>You survey the room

>Nothing really out of the ordinary

>There's some cake on the floor, you suppose you ate some

>No big deal, you can pay for-

>Your train of thought is interrupted entirely by what you see standing in the corner or the room

>A life size statue of you

>Only made of cake and frosting

>It was uncanny

>You walk slowly towards the cake-you

>Rubbing your chin in bemusement, you reach out a finger and dab some frosting away

>It's as you thought

>For some reason, the statue is made entirely of marble cake

 

>Lost in your pondering, you jump when you hear the sound of hooves behind you

>"Anon? What are you doing here? I thought you'd gone to Canterlot"

>Another voice

>"Jeeze, Pinkie, not so loud"

>You turn to see a slightly worse-for-wear Rainbow Dash, flanked by Pinkie Pie

>Incredibly, Pinkie looks fine

>She's her usual springy self

>Even more so when stood next to Rainbow

>Her rainbow mane looks scruffier than it normally does, and there are bags under her eyes

>Pinkie skips forward and stands next to the cake-you

>"Ta-dah! Well, you've already seen him, but still! Isn't he adorable?"

>She starts smushing the cake-you's cheeks with her hooves while making cooing noises at it

>You rub your own face in embarrassment

>You turn to Rainbow

"I'm guessing you two came her with me last night?"

>She nods and yawns

>"Me and Pinkie tagged along to make sure you didn't do anything stupid. Although saying that, I was pretty far gone by the time we left anyway"

"Great, so it's the blind leading the piss-drunk"

>She scowls

>"Screw you Anon, we tried to stop you from being crazy, but after you built this cake-"

>What?

"I built this thing? I don't even know how to bake!"

>She rolls her eyes

>"Well, somehow you managed it. You baked it, then got us all to bow in front of it, calling it the 'deity of the confectionery', whatever that means"

>What is it with drunkface you and overly elaborate vocabulary?

>"Then you started crying and told us that he would have to take care of us now. When we asked why, you told us that your people needed you, and dived out the window!"

>She shakes her head

>"Seriously, Anon. If you're going to get that crazy when you drink, maybe lay off the sauce in future"

>But you didn't even drink that much!

>Come to think of it, you don't remember drinking anything before you blacked out

 

"Rainbow, I don't remember drinking anything last night. Or anything else for that matter"

>Her ears perk up at this

>"Seriously?"

"For really"

>She smiles at this

>"So... wake up anywhere weird?"

>You can feel your face going bright red

"That's none of your damn business, Dash"

>You try to sound firm, but your voice cracks halfway through

>She's grinning now

>"Anyone I know?"

"I mean it Dash, drop it"

>She giggles

>"That's a yes"

>You need to change the subject. And fast.

"I don't have time for this. Are you going to help or what?"

>Dash rolls her eyes and sighs

>"Fine, but after you're done, you gotta tell me everything"

>You explain the bag situation, to which she shakes her head

>"I remember you having the bag at the party, but when we got here, nothing"

>You nod slowly, taking this new information in

"Thanks RD, you helped a lot. See you later"

>She waves

>"Catch you later Anon"

"Bye Pinkie"

>You turn to see Pinkie halfway through cake-you

>At least she has the good grace to look embarrassed

>"Sorry. I couldn't help myself"

>Sleep well, cake Anon

>She can't hurt you any more

 

>You make your way out of the shop and down the street

>There's only one more place to check

>The site of the party

>Twilight's library

>It's crunch time

>A little way behind you, you hear Rainbow laughing almost hysterically

>You turn, smiling, wondering what could be so funny

>The smile freezes on your face, turning to a look of abject horror

>Through the broken shop window you see every mans worst nightmare

>The mare he ran out on that morning

>Alright, perhaps not every man

>She turns, her face the picture of sheer womanly wrath

>Your legs have stopped working and everything has gone slow motion

>How curious

>You don't hear a thing, but Rarity's mouth is opening and closing

>You wonder if this is what a fly feels like before it makes contact with a windscreen

>You see Rainbow and Pinkie rolling on the floor, tears in their eyes

>Snap out of it Anon, here she comes

>Turning, the world regains its regular speed, and you get the fuck out of dodge

>You duck into an alleyway

>Panting, you rest your hands on your knees

>Fortunately, your legs have provided you with the means to escape

>Take that, equine based evolution!

>However, you still have the wrath of Twilight to face

 

>The decorations are still up

>Streamers and ribbons lie on the floor next to discarded party hats

>The covered park benches still have red cups half filled with punch sitting on them

>You sniff the contents of one

>Non alcoholic, just like you remember

>Replacing the cup onto the table, you stride forward towards the wooden door, stopping just in front of it

>You stand, fists clenched in determination, in front of the library

>The irony of storing copious amounts of books inside a tree is not lost on you, but now is not the time

>With grim determination, you knock on the door

>"Just a second!"

>Comes the exasperated reply

>You hear a thud followed by a crash

>You wonder what she could be up to in there

>Finally the door opens

 

>You flinch, expecting at least a vicious tongue lashing

>"Oh, Anon, it's you"

>Sorry, what?

>You open your eyes

>She's already back in the house, seemingly searching for something

"Lost something?"

>You are genuinely perplexed by this turn of events

>Twilight is moving stacks of books around, looking frantically in every direction

>"Where is it... I know I put it here somewhere... Hmm?"

>She looks at you for a split second before turning away again

>"I can't find the saddlebag containing the annual gem tribute"

>He he, you and me both

>Wait, the fuck?

"You mean it was here all along?!"

>She turns to you, looking sheepish

>"Well, when you turned all weird last night, I took the bag for safekeeping"

>Anger levels rising

>Must vent

>You pick up the nearest book and squeeze it really fucking hard

>The book is fine, but you feel better

>"Stop that, Anon"

>The book is taken from your grasp by a field of purple energy

"Twilight, do you have any idea what I've been through today trying to get that bag back?"

>She still doesn't look at you

>"No, no I don't. But that's not really what's important here, now is it?"

>You want the book back so you can brain her with it

>Sighing, you answer through clenched teeth

"Why no, Twilight, I guess not"

>She's still searching as frantically as ever

"Where was the last place you saw it?"

>She pauses her search and turns to you

>"Well, after I realised you'd be in no fit state to deliver the bag, I gave it to Spike to hide it inside"

 

>A dragon

>She gave a bag of gems to a gem-eating dragon

>You give her your best 'really? fucking really?' look

"Where is Spike now?"

>She shrugs

>"I have no idea. In fact, I haven't seen him all day. Wait, you don't think he-"

"That little shit!"

>Twilight gasps

"Sorry. But why can't I remember anything?"

>Twilight looks puzzled for a moment, then levitates a book down

>"I figure Spike must have put something in your drink. I'm looking for any plants or herbs around here that could cause- Ewwwwww!"

"What is it?"

>Her reaction does nothing to calm you down

>She looks at you with a mixture of pity and disgust

>"It says here that when ingested, the only thing that can cause the kind of short term memory amnesia that you're talking about is... dragon urine"

 

>What

>No

>No god

>Your eyes widen in horror

"No!"

>You sink to your knees

"NO!!"

>You curse the gods for ever bringing you to horseland

>That little shit

>Twilight interjects

>"I'm sure he didn't mean anything-"

"He pissed in my drink"

>"Maybe he really needed to go and could find-"

"I drank that. It's in me now. You can't un-know that shit, Twilight"

>She's grasping at straws now

>"Perhaps he thought it was your custom to-"

>You close your eyes and put a finger to her lips, shushing her

"Find him now, please. Use a spell, blow a dragon whistle, I don't care. Just find him"

>She gulps nervously upon hearing the tone of your voice

>Her horn illuminates and she closes her eyes

>Eyes still closed, she speaks

>"You're not going to like this, Anon. He's in your house"