Title: Moon & Star: Interlude For Ten-Strings Author: Bronitz Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/ceYPSeXY First Edit: Tuesday 24th of April 2012 05:54:02 AM CDT Last Edit: Tuesday 24th of April 2012 05:54:02 AM CDT Moon & Star: Interlude For Ten-Strings StrangeCreed 04/24/12(Tue)02:18 No.1497910   >you are now Moon, son of Bit and Smidget >you've been put into a big damned pickup truck, and a fuzzy human is driving you off >out of the window are vast fields of green >your sister stares in awe of this with nose pressed against the glass >the radio whines out some kind of attempt at fusing Kentucky Bluegrass with 80's Hair Metal >it is terrible, and you already miss home >the hairy human's hand ruffles the fluff of your darker blue mane Don't worry, lil' fella. The farm's got plenty of room and food for you. >frankly, you don't believe him, but your old owner wouldn't hand you off to some freak >still, you're quiet until he puts Star and yourself down on the grass, and he lays down the rules >pretty standard stuff, and unlike other fluffy ponies you remember it easily >Star goes off to explore this new property and you follow >your new owner's property is much larger and far greener than your old home >the trees alone are far beyond taller than any you've seen before >you trot along in relative silence until you come to a wooden fence >your luck and keen nose has actually lead you to wild strawberries growing next to one of the posts >Star, without thinking waddles over to feast while you watch, homesickness having ruined your appetite >while she is gorging, you see movement >clumsy, pastel fluff movement   >trundling out of the underbrush is a dirty unicorn the color of mint leaves >"Bad fwuffies! Dis our nummies!" the unicorn barks as more emerge, puffing their cheeks and fanning their wings >your hoof pokes Star's rear, startling her with a little eep >"Wha...? Fewal fwuffies?" she says through a mouthful of juicy red mush >you apologize, pulling your sister from the little bush >there's still plenty of fat berries left but this belligerant savage still seems upset >infantile threats of 'ouchies' cause you to retreat >not out of any real fear, but because you're not going to get into a fight over fruit >as the two of you walk off, the herd begins grazing on the grass and cheering about chasing off bad fluffies >normally you like to think you're above the petty bloodlust of your father >you are a peacful creature >however, something about these stupid mongrels really rustles your fluffy jimmes >back to the house and ask your new friend when lunch is served >you are pleased when he doesn't bother with cliches and gives you a bit of oatmeal with bits of peach in it >fucking sick of spaghetti   >Star divulges to the big hairy guy that a bunch of feral fluffies were grazing on his land >this doesn't please him, but he doesn't seem overly concerned >you ask him about his reaction, but he tries to explain it like you're a slow child >after an... inadequate explanation about how they'll probably try to claim the house for themselves and shit all over everything, you excuse yourself to go deal with the problem >you aren't a violent fluffy but if they're going to try making your life hell, you'd rather get the first punch in >they're still milling around near the fence, humping or grazing or just playing their stupid little games >the minty idiot is dismounting from a brown earth fluffy when you show up >he puffs his cheeks and stomps the grass, his posse following suit >"Smawty fwiend say dis our gwassies now! Dumb fwuffy go!" >you facehoof and try to explain that they have to leave because your owner is probably going to kill them if they don't >they apparently lack a concept of death and the 'smart friend' now wants to force you away >he starts biting and trying to gore your fluff >more annoying than painful but this is aggression you don't care to deal with >unlike your parents, you actually have something closer to an actual horse's hoof >you give a comparatively hard strike across the unicorn's horn >while the idiot's little brain is rattled, you rear back and slam both hooves into his wide-open eyes   >previously tough tough dissolves into scared whimpering as the not-so-smarty friend goes into shock >hooves bloodied, you start walking back to the farmhouse >the herd follows you >facehoof again, getting minty's blood on your face >you ask why they're following you after you killed their stupid leader >apparently they now think you're their smart friend >jimmies mysteriously unrustled by this >you don't have the patience for this, and keep walking >Star is belly-up in the hairy guy's lap as he bobs back and forth in a rocking chair >you climb the steps, hooves clacking on the wooden steppes >your new minions shy from the "two-weg munstah" as he looks down with eyes glazed and pungent smoke rolling from his mouth O-oh man! What happened, Moon? >you explain the nature of your predicament >he rubs the back of his neck Man, that's kind of fucked up but... you gotta own up to responsibility... >fluffypokerface.jpg >as if to puncuate this, a dam goes into labor and one of the stallions has a particularly loud case of diarrhea   >between the spastic dookie of Mr. Shit-Kazoo and the screaming of "babehs comin'" you can tell watching over these morons is going to be Herculean >Star stirs onto her side, "Moon, why fewas fowwing you?" >you explain it again, your sister laughing at your misfortune while Hairy rubs her belly >"do you want a cwown, yo' higness?!" >you sneer bitterly, but you know this probably looks more silly than threatening >insulted, you feel like she's questioning your ability to lead >even if it was entirely unintentional, you resolve to rule these dipshits well, if only to throw it in Star's smug blue face >one of the new foals is a minty green unicorn >with a show of brutality, you crush it's soft skull under your hoof and lay down your law >they weep as you tell them that they are no longer going to wander or mate as they please >you are a blood-drenched Buddha that will teach them a better way to live even if half of them are too broken and bloody to hear him >this diatribe impresses Hairy, but the fluffies are more confused than anything   >in smaller words and with great repetition you lay down your laws >first off, they aren't allowed to give "special hugs" without your permission >they will graze where you say, when you say >bodily waste is to be deposited where the "two-leg monster" tells you to >you crush no more foals, but you threaten to hurt more of their young if they fail to understand >with that handled, you tell them to bed down in your new owner's crops, but anyone eating it will be dealt with >they don't know what that means, but you make sure it sounds bad >unlike your old owner, Hairy lets you sleep in his big wide bed >you both rest near his head, since him rolling over in the night would likely prove painful, if not deadly >thus ends your first day as a barbarian king >just the tip of a shit-iceberg