Thread Bumping Oneshots

 _____________________________________________________________________________________________

|    This is a paste dedicated to the small one/two post oneshot I fulfill in the thread.     |

 _____________________________________________________________________________________________

~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~

Anons a thin little twig and Snowflake has decided to take him under his wing and make him a rippling pile of man meat! (Aug. 3rd, 2013)

~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~

 

>"Squats and oats!"

>Holy fuck.

>You've heard that shit at home all the time, but never before have you met someone, or some pony, who actually lived by the phrase.

>Snowflake continues to stuff your mouth with mushy flakes as you feel the prior spoonful slowly rise in your stomach.

>If this continu—

"YEAH!"

>Snowflake stuff another ladle worth of oats into your mouth, forcing bit already in your mouth down.

>With a weary swallow, you down the food and resist the urge to puke.

>Going to this stallion for help was the biggest mistake you could have ever done.

>Everyday, you looked into the mirror and stared at a tiny, meek man look back at you, and to be quite frank, you were sick of it.

>That, and the fact that Rainbow Dash wanted nothing to do with a weakling like you.

>For the longest time, you tried your best to woo her until she bluntly told you that her "profile would be destroyed if she went out with a scrawny thing like you".

>So, by chance, you found the flier telling what a great success Snowflake was as a trainer.

>Never did it say anywhere in the description about down shitloads of oats and crazy amounts of physical labor.

>Snowflake grabs six large containers and begins pouring them into a bucket, leaving you in a cold sweat.

>By God, what could he be concocting in that container?!

>He slides the canister across the table and points at it with his hoof.

>"Drink," he grunts.

>Looking down into the bucket, you grimace as the light-brown muck stirs inside.

>Whatever was in here, you had to get past it.

>You had a goal and there was no way you'd let something like this prevent you from completing it.

>With an exaggerated sigh, you lift the container and down the liquid, holding back the urge to chuck it back up.

>Snowflake nods his head slowly, proud to see you take your first step into his domain.

>"YEAH!" he bellows, flexing his forelegs. "COME ON! SCREAM IT WITH ME!"

"Yeah!" you meekly say.

>His facial expression changes from ecstatic to grimace almost instantly.

>"LOUDER! I WANT YOU TO FEEL EMPOWERED!"

>Taking a deep breath, you put your whole body into it.

"Yeah!"

>"YEAH!"

"YEAH!"

>"YEAHHHH!"

_____

 

>Grabbing the picture, you look at yourself and then back to the mirror.

>Those six months of non-stop workouts and running really paid off.

>Flexing your body, you can't help but stare at the beautiful body that you've slaved to sculpt.

>These abs, these traps, this back; it's like discovering the eight wonder of the world!

>Rarity didn't hesitate to make you new clothes, making sure they were a nice, tight fit to display your hard work and dedication.

>Throwing on a t-shirt, you walk out the front door only to bump into none other than Rainbow Dash.

>"Oh! H-hey Anon! Wow..."

>She scans your body from head to toe, mouth gaping.

>"So it's true! I thought Rarity was just kidding, but you really got something going on there," she says with a wink.

>With a flick of her head, she whips her mane back and tries her best to woo you with her smile.

>"Say, if you're not busy today, how about we go see a movie?"

>Here it is.

>The moment you worked so tirelessly for.

>All that sweat, all that pain: it was for this moment right here, right now.

"Nah, I'm good. Today's ab day and I don't want to miss that," you tell her bluntly as you pass her.

>Rainbow shakes her head in confusion, not expecting that result as you brohoof your buddy and trainer.

>Pulling a "Most Muscular" pose, you bellow out the one thing that has been pushing you for the past several months.

"YEAH!"

 

~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~

"Birthday Cake"

~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~

 

>"So, Anon. I heard your birthday is tomorrow."

>You look up from your book at a clearly distraught Twilight.

>Sweat beads across her forehead as a cheesy, nervous smile crosses her lips.

>Raising your hand, you put across her forehead.

"Are you sick or something, Twi?" you ask.

>Twilight wrenches your hand away, a blush developing across her cheeks.

>"I'm fine! I was just wondering... you know... what you want for your birthday."

>Furrowing your brow, you take a moment to look at the mare.

>To be honest, your birthday was just another day to you.

"I don't want anything," you state, returning your gaze back to the read in your hands.

>"Then how abou—"

"I don't want a party either," you bluntly say.

>Twilight's smile drops as she stutters, trying to think of some way to get her answer.

>"B-but it's your birthday! You only get one a year!"

>Not taking your eyes away from the page, you let out a disgruntled sigh.

"So does every other day of the year. Honestly, Twilight, I don't want anything."

>Twilight hangs her head in defeat, muttering a faint, "Okay," before sulking off.

>You hate being so blunt, but you honestly don't want to celebrate such a stupid occasion.

>Leaning back in your seat, you look up at the ceiling before nodding off.

______

>"Did he say a beach ball? I bet he said he wanted a beach ball!"

>Pinkie bounces around Twilight as they slowly approach Sugarcube Corner for their weekly lunch.

>Everything so far was going according to schedule and she even had some extra time to spare.

>Even though everything was going smoothly, finding out what she was going to do for Anonymous's birthday was not.

>"He told me he didn't want anything, not even a party."

>Pinkie stops mid-stride, her expression looking like that of a mare who just found out she's a colt.

>"Not even a party?! Is he sick? Everyp0ny loves a party!"

>Twilight shakes her head.

>"Not Anonymous. He just wants to go about his day like normal."

>Pinkie puts a hoof to her chin and thinks.

>"Maybe he's just being modest?"

>Twilight shakes her head once more.

>"No, I know Anonymous. He's too honest for his own good."

>Pinkie closes her eyes for a moment, deep in thought.

>Her eyes burst open, almost as if they'll pop out of her head.

>"A cake! But not just any cake..."

>Twilight looks to the pink mare in confusion.

>Pinkie grins, cause a cold sweat to develop on Twilight's face.

______

>Opening your eyes, you look outside the window to your side.

>The sun is gone, so it's safe to assume you passed out while reading in the afternoon.

>Turning back to the room, you notice a faint light coming from upstairs.

>You drag your feet up the stairs almost as if attracted to the light like a bug.

>Was Twilight still up reading?

>That mare's going to ruin her eyes if she kee—

>Stopping at the top of the stairs, you look at Twilight who hold a cake up with a magical aura, covered in head to hoof with bits of hardened batter and frosting.

>She gives you a meek smile as you slowly approach her.

>"I'm sorry, Anon," she mutters. "I tried my best to make it for you. I followed the book to the 't', but it still came out ugly. I haven't even tri—"

>Grabbing a piece of the cake, you shove it into your mouth and chew.

>It doesn't taste amazing, but it's passable.

>"Do you like it?" she asks, her tone barely audible.

>Kneeling down, you wrap your arms around her neck and bring her in for a hug.

"It's best cake— and present— I never asked for."

 

~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~

Apple Whiskey

~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~x~

 

>Leaning up against the tree, you can't help but rememeber thoughts about home.

>There's just something about stargazing that makes you think.

>Every once in a while, you find yourself in a random area of town, looking up at the brightly lit sky.

>Tonight, it's in Sweet Apple Acres.

>Digging into your jacket, you pull out your flask and take a swig.

>Pony whiskey wasn't very potent to you, but it is better than nothing.

>With a heavy sigh, you close the canister and resume your viewing.

>Thoughts of family and friends begin to ravage your head as you peer at the constalations.

>What's your best friend doing right now?

>He used to always get in trouble when you were around, so he's probably dead or arrested by now.

>You chuckle at your own joke and shake your head before the crunching of leaves catches your attention.

>Turning your head, you stare straight at a pair of sap green eyes illuminating in the moonlight.

"Hey Mac," you mutter, turning back to the sky.

>The large crimson stallion takes a seat beside you with audible 'pomf' as his flank meets the ground.

>An awkward silence fills the air as you wait for Big Mac to say something, but you quickly remember that he doesn't talk much.

>Digging back in pocket, you grab the flask again and take another swig.

"Want some?" you ask him, motioning the container in his direction.

>He eyes it hungerily, almost as if something is holding him back.

>With a weary hoof, he grabs the canister and takes a swig, letting out a relieved sigh.

>Putting the flask back in your jacket, you can't help but chuckle as Big Mac's cheeks get rosy from the booze.

"What brought you out here?" you question, looking around the orchard. "I'm not exactly near the barn."

>Big Mac performs what looks like a shrug and looks down the hill.

>"Winona," he grunts.

>The dog must have seen you and told her owners, so Big Mac was the one stuck with investigating.

>Scratching the back of your head, you turn the stallion with a bit of worry.

"I'm not intruding, am I?"

>"Nope," Big Mac mutters, shaking his head.

>Stopping mid-scratch, you nod and turn back to the sky.

>For a moment, you can feel the tension coming from Big Mac, almost as if he has something to say.

"What's on your mind?" you ask.

>He turns to you, confused for a second by your question.

>You both stare each other down, waiting for the other to break.

>Big Mac turns back to the sky and lets out a disgruntled sigh.

>"Nothin' major. Just been thinking about my life is all."

>Leaning forward, you cross your legs and wear a grin.

"I'm no pyschitrist, but I'm all ears if you got something you need to get off your chest."

>The stallions eyes don't move from the sky as he begins his tale.

>"Ever since Ah was a colt, Ah wanted to major in mathmatics. Mah pa told me Ah couldn't do that 'cuz Ah was the next in line to take the farm. Ah ran off to Manehatten at a young age and studied there for a bit before Applejack came to me with news of our parents' passing."

>Your heart sinks a bit.

>This wasn't what you were expecting to hear, but you were going to help this guy out to the best of your abilities.

>Placing a hand on his shoulder, you give him a reassuring nod before he continues.

>"The thing that pains me is that I never told my pa I was sorry for running off, for abandoning the farm, and f-for... for..."

>His lip begins to quiver and his voice trails off as tears fill his eyes.

"Never saying goodbye?" you finish.

>Big Mac nods his head before letting himself go, bawwing out like a small child.

>You can hear the pain in his sobs and hiccups as tears trail down his cheeks.

>Lifting your jacket flap up, you look down at the flask and shake your head.

>It may not be potent to you, but it sure worked charms on ponies.

"You have to stop doing that," you say.

>Big Mac's sobs cut short as he meets your gaze.

"You're beating yourself up. Sure, you didn't get to say goodbye to him. I... I know the feeling."

>He stops for a moment before realizing it.

>Sitting right next to him is a foreign creature who wrenched from his home against his will.

>With a hard swallow, Big Mac stops and looks up to the sky, wiping the tears from his eyes.

>"Thank you," he whispers before leaning back against the tree.

>Chuckling to yourself, follow his suit and look back at the stars.

>Neither of you utter a word until the sun raising over the mountainside the next morning.