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Shitty Day (Oneshot)

By: Bolding on Feb 22nd, 2013  |  syntax: None  |  size: 1.87 KB  |  hits: 253  |  expires: Never
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  1. >Day "Why did I agree to a burrito eating contest last night?" in Equestria.
  2. >Your insides begin to churn as you sit inside the kitchen of Sugarcube corner.
  3. >Pinkie had asked you to try all the new treats for Princess Celestia's visit tomorrow.
  4. >You hadn't counted on your bowels causing you to lose focus, though.
  5. >Grabbing your abdomen, you hold down the fire in your anus for a bit longer.
  6. >Pinkie hands you another cupcake, this time with a green and brown frosting mix.
  7. >It swirls like a curly turd.
  8. >That's it, can't take it any more.
  9. >You quickly stand and head for the bathroom, only to be blocked off by Pinkie.
  10. >"Anon, we're not done yet! Where are you going?"
  11. >Your face begin to turn red as you attempt to walk around her with no success.
  12. "Pinkie, give me like fifteen minutes, I really have to go number two right now!"
  13. >She doesn't budge as a giant shit-eating grin takes over her face.
  14. >"I'll let you go on one condition!"
  15. >Instrument begin to play as your heart drops.
  16. "Oh god, not a fucking song."
  17. >Pinkie begins to bounce up and down as she follows the rhythm of the music.
  18. >"Pooping is good, but leaving is rude to your friend,"
  19. >"If you're not careful, a friendship could just end!"
  20. >You try to push her away, with no success.
  21. >"So listen to me and disregard the rants,"
  22. >She puts a hoof to your chest
  23. >"Just let it go and do it inside your pants!"
  24. >Turtleheading now.
  25. >Very little time.
  26. >"Just do it where you want! Do it anywhere!"
  27. >"In the store, on the floor, do it in here!"
  28. >Can't hold it, it's gonna break through!
  29. >You feel it sliding out.
  30. >Dropping to the floor, you assume the fetal position.
  31. >"Pooping anywhere is fine, we do it all the time!"
  32. >She drops a turd on the floor.
  33. >"If you hold it for so long, it should be considered a crime!"
  34. >The music stops.
  35. >A foul aroma fills the air.
  36. >Your pants were stained and soiled.
  37. >Today was a shitty day.
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