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Pale's Sexual Misadventures

By: Bizzles on Jun 19th, 2012 | syntax: None | size: 8.03 KB | hits: 147 | expires: Never

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>Day 777 in Equestria.
>You are Pale Narrator.
>It must be your lucky day.
>However, knowing Bizzles and what he writes it most likely isn't.
>Being the fuckhead you are, you eat shit walking down your stairs and slam your head onto the floor below.
>"GOD DAMIT!"
>Maybe not so lucky.
>Fuck it, shit happens.
"Fuck, I think I just broke my face..."
>You get your ass off your floor and stand up.
>You walk into the bathroom and look at yourself in the mirror.
>Shit.
>You most definitely broke your face.
>Hope it's not too bad.
>WAIT! You know the solution to every problem.
:{
"OUUUCH! Dammit that hurt!"
>You can't make you signature :3
>This day gets better and better.
>Hmmm perhaps Fluttershy can help you out, she is good with this kinda stuff after all.
>You get dressed and head off to Fluttershy's cottage.
>If only you noticed the bush with 5 pairs of eyes slowly following you off the side of the road.
>Well whoever they are they definitely notice you.
>They attack at the exact right time.
>When you are practicing your :3 in your mini mirror.
:{
"Mmm Nope."
:]
"Nada."
:4
"What the absolute fuck was that?"
>"TASTE MY ROYAL HOOVE PESANT!"
>WHAT THE FU-
>Luna flies through the air and hits you square in the face with her hoof.
"OH SON OF A BITCH!"
>Rage mode activated
>You jump up and prepare to attack when you see the rest.
>Stop mid-air.
>Luna, Pinkie, Lyra, Aj, and... Colgate?
>They are all just standing there.
"Umm what the fuck was that for?"
>PP" Well Silly, We just love that you spent so much time writing us we wanted to thank you!"
"Okay... Well that's swell and all but can I ask you something?
>AJ” Well shoot, I don't see why ya can't"
>L"THOU MAY ASK THY QUESTION!"
"Yeah, so if you all love me, WHY DID YOU ATTACK ME!" "AND WHY IS COLGATE HERE?"
>PP" Because Bizzles thinks it's funny to force Colgate upon you silly!"
>Bizzles what the fuck.
>Lyra” And well, you know, if we just came at you and asked to have sex with us we thought you would say no.
"Now why on earth would I say no, I mean come on you coul- wait WHAT!"
>C" We are going to rape you, it's okay, I brought my brush! Brushie Brushie, Squee!"
>Dear god.
>What is happening.
>You don't even believe in god.
>But here you are.
>There is only one thing to do.
:k
>PP"BUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Your face is still broken! Teeheheee!"
>Fuck.
>Plan B it is.
"Hahahaha...LATER!" You take off towards Fluttershy’s Cottage but it's so far away.
>Plan c.
>Into the EverFree Forest!
>You can at least buy some time in there.
>Right?
>You feel a rough thick rope latch around your right foot.
>AJ"I hope ya enjoy ya trip Pale!"
>PP" Pffft a-and pfffft se-see you next fall! Pfftahahahahahahahahaa!"
>Oh fuck me that was just horr-
>You hit the ground.
>Hard.
>C" looky here girls. It's...Dangalang time."
"Oh wow Bizzles, fuc-"
>You don't finish your sentence.
>Pinkie shoved a sock in your mouth.
>Why?
>PP" Now this is the part where we fuck! Hahahahaha, d-do you get it hahahah!"
>Fuck you irony.
>Irony" Fuck you Pale"
>Aj" D'all here that? Wha'd ya reckon that was?"
>L" Thou art not right in thyn head"
>PP" Let's just get this party started!"
>You shed a single tear as all of the ponies you love and Colgate slowly make their way towards you.
>FS"WAIT...you know, if you don't mind that is..."
>Fluttershy, She'll save you!
>Lyra" Hey Fluttershy, Didn't think you were gonna make it!"
>...damn.
>FS" How could I not show up for this. I mean, he did save me from those bandits..."
>Pinkie, your Pinkie, looks you in the eyes.
>PP :3
>"MMMNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!"
>PP" Yes my sweet"
>Pinkie takes your head with both hooves and pulls your head into her tits...located at the rear.
>That's right, anatomically correct ponies.
>Your worst nightmare.
>Hmmm they smell like cotton candy.
>This would be nice if they weren't Pinkie's breast and you weren't being raped.
>But some people just like to watch the world burn.
>Because rape, rape never changes...
>C" Take off his gag!"
>Luna trots up to you and takes it out.
"Oh for the love of god what now!"
>C"I have to make sure you have clean teeth before we put that mouth of yours anywhere!"
>...
"We-"
>She pulls a toothbrush out of her marehood, stopping you mid word.
>C" Don't worry anon, I'm just making sure it's nice and minty! Unlike toothpaste, I can get every single germ in your mouth, none of that 99.99% bull that the dentist feed you! There is a reason they call me Colgate after all!"
>She shoves the toothbrush into your mouth and vigorously scrubs away at your teeth, gums and tongue.
>Damn she's thorough.
>C" Now that we are done here, It's time for the rise!"
>The rest of the ponies hold you down as she prepares herself.
>C" Let’s see if your tongue is as good at this as it is as when you narrate"
"Nooooooo-
>She places her lips on yours.
>And not the lips on her face.
>You keep your mouth shut tight as possible.
>C" Oh anon, You have to breath sometime"
>What does she mean?
>Your nose is still free.
>Oh no.
>You spoke to soon.
>She shoves your nose into her breast cutting off all air.
>C" If you want to breathe, you have do as your told Pale! Teheeee"
"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah"
>You open your mouth and take in a gasp of fresh air.
>Sadly, It's not so fresh.
>Wow, she really does taste like mint.
>Oh man!
>It burns!
>C"Mmmmm, win-win for the both of us, yes? I get this and you get a super duper clean mouth!"
>Man.
>You have been at it for atleast 4 minutes.
>She gets off your face.
"Huuuuhh huuhh"
>as you sit there and pant, the rest of the ponies get up.
"Whin I gith mah handths in yauuu..."
>Man your mouth is so numb you can't even talk.
>PP"Teehee! You sound so funny! My turn!"
>Pinkie grabs you and throws you down.
>She sits on your lap and leans into your neck.
>She whispers into your ear.
>PP"don't worry Pale, I won't bite...soft."
>Wut
>Using her strange Pinkie powers, she throws confetti at you and your clothes somehow disappears into a puff of smoke.
>She jumps on your limp dick and slides her marehood across it.
>Penes pls dunt do dis
>Penis"Pael pls"
>You penis betrays you, getting hornier than Twilight in a library.
>PP"Oooo It's kinda tiny! Haha, That's okay!"
"Fluck yaaaau!"
>PP" What was that Pale? I can't understand you."
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
>PP :3
>...
>You decide to kill yourself when this is all over.
>Pinkie jumps on the penis that has betrayed you while you’re not paying attetion.
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
>How does something so wrong feel sooooooooooooooooooooo good?
>Wait snap out of it!
>You can't feel this way...but oh wow...
>Shit!
>Alright sad thoughts
>Hmmmmm My Little Dashie...
>Your eyes begin to tear up.
>Brain"Hey Buddy, remember the part where they fuck!"
>Oh god dam-
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
>You can't even think anymore.
>The only thing you can focus on is the pink pony bouncing up and down at the speed of well...Pinkie.
>THAT'S TOO FUCKING FAST
>You can feel yourself at the edge of cumming.
>Pinkie knows it to.
>She looks you dead in the eyes and shoves her tongue down your throat.
>That's all she needed.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
>You let off a shit storm of your seed into here poon but she doesn't stop.
>She's had her taste of you and no longer feels like sharing with the others.
>She's going to end it now.
>You feel a strong suction on your dick.
>Your eyes roll into the back of your head.
>Pinkie just went full on Hoover Vacuum on your dick with her vagina.
>You can't control yourself.
>You can literally feel your semen being sucked out.
>She sucking you dry.
>Finally, you’re at the point where you're gonna pass out from pleasure.
>Or pain.
>You're so close to passing out you don't even know anymore.
>The sucking stops.
>You slowly close your eyes and begin to enter the land of dreams.
>Right before you do you look a Pinkie.
>She is giving you the most loving stare ever.
>Maybe this wasn't so bad.
>PP"AAAACHUUUUUUU!"
>She sneezes right on your face.
>There is only one problem.
>Confetti didn't come out.
>Your sperm did.
>PP :3
End of Part 1.

create a new version of this paste RAW Paste Data

>Day 777 in Equestria.
>You are Pale Narrator.
>It must be your lucky day.
>However, knowing Bizzles and what he writes it most likely isn't.
>Being the fuckhead you are, you eat shit walking down your stairs and slam your head onto the floor below.
>"GOD DAMIT!"
>Maybe not so lucky.
>Fuck it, shit happens.
"Fuck, I think I just broke my face..."
>You get your ass off your floor and stand up.
>You walk into the bathroom and look at yourself in the mirror.
>Shit.
>You most definitely broke your face.
>Hope it's not too bad.
>WAIT! You know the solution to every problem.
:{
"OUUUCH! Dammit that hurt!"
>You can't make you signature :3
>This day gets better and better.
>Hmmm perhaps Fluttershy can help you out, she is good with this kinda stuff after all.
>You get dressed and head off to Fluttershy's cottage.
>If only you noticed the bush with 5 pairs of eyes slowly following you off the side of the road.
>Well whoever they are they definitely notice you.
>They attack at the exact right time.
>When you are practicing your :3 in your mini mirror.
:{
"Mmm Nope."
:]
"Nada."
:4
"What the absolute fuck was that?"
>"TASTE MY ROYAL HOOVE PESANT!"
>WHAT THE FU-
>Luna flies through the air and hits you square in the face with her hoof.
"OH SON OF A BITCH!"
>Rage mode activated
>You jump up and prepare to attack when you see the rest.
>Stop mid-air.
>Luna, Pinkie, Lyra, Aj, and... Colgate?
>They are all just standing there.
"Umm what the fuck was that for?"
>PP" Well Silly, We just love that you spent so much time writing us we wanted to thank you!"
"Okay... Well that's swell and all but can I ask you something?
>AJ” Well shoot, I don't see why ya can't"
>L"THOU MAY ASK THY QUESTION!"
"Yeah, so if you all love me, WHY DID YOU ATTACK ME!" "AND WHY IS COLGATE HERE?"
>PP" Because Bizzles thinks it's funny to force Colgate upon you silly!"
>Bizzles what the fuck.
>Lyra” And well, you know, if we just came at you and asked to have sex with us we thought you would say no.
"Now why on earth would I say no, I mean come on you coul- wait WHAT!"
>C" We are going to rape you, it's okay, I brought my brush! Brushie Brushie, Squee!"
>Dear god.
>What is happening.
>You don't even believe in god.
>But here you are.
>There is only one thing to do.
:k
>PP"BUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Your face is still broken! Teeheheee!"
>Fuck.
>Plan B it is.
"Hahahaha...LATER!" You take off towards Fluttershy’s Cottage but it's so far away.
>Plan c.
>Into the EverFree Forest!
>You can at least buy some time in there.
>Right?
>You feel a rough thick rope latch around your right foot.
>AJ"I hope ya enjoy ya trip Pale!"
>PP" Pffft a-and pfffft se-see you next fall! Pfftahahahahahahahahaa!"
>Oh fuck me that was just horr-
>You hit the ground.
>Hard.
>C" looky here girls. It's...Dangalang time."
"Oh wow Bizzles, fuc-"
>You don't finish your sentence.
>Pinkie shoved a sock in your mouth.
>Why?
>PP" Now this is the part where we fuck! Hahahahaha, d-do you get it hahahah!"
>Fuck you irony.
>Irony" Fuck you Pale"
>Aj" D'all here that? Wha'd ya reckon that was?"
>L" Thou art not right in thyn head"
>PP" Let's just get this party started!"
>You shed a single tear as all of the ponies you love and Colgate slowly make their way towards you.
>FS"WAIT...you know, if you don't mind that is..."
>Fluttershy, She'll save you!
>Lyra" Hey Fluttershy, Didn't think you were gonna make it!"
>...damn.
>FS" How could I not show up for this. I mean, he did save me from those bandits..."
>Pinkie, your Pinkie, looks you in the eyes.
>PP :3
>"MMMNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!"
>PP" Yes my sweet"
>Pinkie takes your head with both hooves and pulls your head into her tits...located at the rear.
>That's right, anatomically correct ponies.
>Your worst nightmare.
>Hmmm they smell like cotton candy.
>This would be nice if they weren't Pinkie's breast and you weren't being raped.
>But some people just like to watch the world burn.
>Because rape, rape never changes...
>C" Take off his gag!"
>Luna trots up to you and takes it out.
"Oh for the love of god what now!"
>C"I have to make sure you have clean teeth before we put that mouth of yours anywhere!"
>...
"We-"
>She pulls a toothbrush out of her marehood, stopping you mid word.
>C" Don't worry anon, I'm just making sure it's nice and minty! Unlike toothpaste, I can get every single germ in your mouth, none of that 99.99% bull that the dentist feed you! There is a reason they call me Colgate after all!"
>She shoves the toothbrush into your mouth and vigorously scrubs away at your teeth, gums and tongue. 
>Damn she's thorough.
>C" Now that we are done here, It's time for the rise!"
>The rest of the ponies hold you down as she prepares herself.
>C" Let’s see if your tongue is as good at this as it is as when you narrate"
"Nooooooo-
>She places her lips on yours. 
>And not the lips on her face.
>You keep your mouth shut tight as possible.
>C" Oh anon, You have to breath sometime"
>What does she mean?
>Your nose is still free.
>Oh no.
>You spoke to soon.
>She shoves your nose into her breast cutting off all air.
>C" If you want to breathe, you have do as your told Pale! Teheeee"
"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah"
>You open your mouth and take in a gasp of fresh air.
>Sadly, It's not so fresh.
>Wow, she really does taste like mint.
>Oh man!
>It burns! 
>C"Mmmmm, win-win for the both of us, yes? I get this and you get a super duper clean mouth!"
>Man.
>You have been at it for atleast 4 minutes.
>She gets off your face.
"Huuuuhh huuhh"
>as you sit there and pant, the rest of the ponies get up. 
"Whin I gith mah handths in yauuu..."
>Man your mouth is so numb you can't even talk.
>PP"Teehee! You sound so funny! My turn!"
>Pinkie grabs you and throws you down.
>She sits on your lap and leans into your neck.
>She whispers into your ear.
>PP"don't worry Pale, I won't bite...soft."
>Wut
>Using her strange Pinkie powers, she throws confetti at you and your clothes somehow disappears into a puff of smoke.
>She jumps on your limp dick and slides her marehood across it. 
>Penes pls dunt do dis
>Penis"Pael pls"
>You penis betrays you, getting hornier than Twilight in a library.
>PP"Oooo It's kinda tiny! Haha, That's okay!"
"Fluck yaaaau!"
>PP" What was that Pale? I can't understand you."
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
>PP :3
>...
>You decide to kill yourself when this is all over.
>Pinkie jumps on the penis that has betrayed you while you’re not paying attetion.
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
>How does something so wrong feel sooooooooooooooooooooo good?
>Wait snap out of it!
>You can't feel this way...but oh wow...
>Shit!
>Alright sad thoughts
>Hmmmmm My Little Dashie...
>Your eyes begin to tear up.
>Brain"Hey Buddy, remember the part where they fuck!"
>Oh god dam-
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"
>You can't even think anymore.
>The only thing you can focus on is the pink pony bouncing up and down at the speed of well...Pinkie.
>THAT'S TOO FUCKING FAST
>You can feel yourself at the edge of cumming.
>Pinkie knows it to.
>She looks you dead in the eyes and shoves her tongue down your throat.
>That's all she needed.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
>You let off a shit storm of your seed into here poon but she doesn't stop.
>She's had her taste of you and no longer feels like sharing with the others.
>She's going to end it now.
>You feel a strong suction on your dick.
>Your eyes roll into the back of your head.
>Pinkie just went full on Hoover Vacuum on your dick with her vagina.
>You can't control yourself. 
>You can literally feel your semen being sucked out.
>She sucking you dry.
>Finally, you’re at the point where you're gonna pass out from pleasure. 
>Or pain.
>You're so close to passing out you don't even know anymore.
>The sucking stops.
>You slowly close your eyes and begin to enter the land of dreams.
>Right before you do you look a Pinkie.
>She is giving you the most loving stare ever. 
>Maybe this wasn't so bad.
>PP"AAAACHUUUUUUU!"
>She sneezes right on your face.
>There is only one problem.
>Confetti didn't come out.
>Your sperm did.
>PP :3

End of Part 1.

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