To Be Human: Chapter 1 (A Departed Soul)

>”Did you see the new stallions down the block? I’ve heard they’re quite charming.”

>Eleven thousand eight hundred and fifty five.

>The Pegasus flutters her wings and her face flushes red, “I saw them during weather duty. I thought I was about to faint when the older one smiled at me.”

>Fifteen thousand six hundred and thirty seven.

>The two are joined by yet a third pony, a unicorn, the other two welcoming her, “Are you talking about the Fuller brothers? I haven’t seen looks like those since I was in Manehattan. Real lookers I’ll tell you.”

>Two hundred and five.

>They talk of such interesting things these ponies.

>And the words they use… What is a ‘looker’? Could it be a sort of ethnic term?

>”Don’t you two be forgetting that they’re not the only good looking ones around here,” she whispers, “I’ve been getting some glances from you know who.”

>The unicorn rolls her eyes, “Oh here we go.”

>”I really do, Geena. The way he talks to me sometimes.”

>”Eeeyup,” the Pegasus says in a masculine tone.

>”HEY!”

 

>The three begin to fade from view as you feast your eyes upon the town of ‘Ponyville.’

>There’s something soothing about this township, if that is the correct emotion to use.

>It’s hard to- grasp these things sometimes.

>The clamber from the eastern part of town catches your attention and you see what the fuss is about.

>Oh yes, the accident.

>It’s a lively scene, as was planned from the start.

>Though the screaming could be done without, it has a way of disrupting one’s thoughts.

>The overturned wagon serves as a center point for the fiasco, the other p0nies seemingly unaware of the concealed passenger.

>But you know.

>She doesn’t understand when you take her, but then not many do.

>”It all happened so fast,” she explained as you ferried her along. “I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”

“Not many do.”

>She notes the gentle warmth as she takes the last stride home, back with her kin.

>It must be nice this time of year.

 

>Moisture drips down the faces of the spectator’s, the survivor of the crash in a daze, a gash alongside his head.

>Three.

>You’ll make sure to see him in the hospital.

>If memory serves they had the right of way, only to be rammed by an inebriated fellow.

>You spot this p0ny as he tries to slink away from the scene, a pair of guards arresting him.

>The fear in his eyes only widen as he spots the hoof sticking out from the cart’s bottom.

>A doctor is rushed onto the scene, but you know it’s too late. Her time came and went.

>He gives a full effort nonetheless, his breath quickening with each press as he desperately attempts to save her.

>The crowd turns silent as he presses his ear against her chest, the doctor rising silently and shaking his head, sobs beginning to ring out from the crowd.

>”If only I’d gotten here sooner.”

>”There’s nothing you could’ve done,” a p0ny tries to reassure him.

>He’s correct. Some things cannot be changed.

>You zoom in on the drunk one last time as he’s lead off in chains.

>Four thousand nine hundred and four.

>You thought it’d be lower.

 

>You find yourself curious of his future, though some things are best left to those of a more qualified nature.

>Someone said that to you once, don’t re-live the past, don’t pre-live the future, live the present.

>Who said this and what became of them is unknown to you, but the wisdom remains.

>You never thought much of this phrase, there are too many matters to attend to.

>The Fillypines still require your personal attention with the recent conflicts therein.

>However, you don’t like leaving this little town in Equestria. So why leave?

>…There. Now you can browse a little longer.

>Some tasks take a bit longer than most, but for loads below the hundreds you can safely push them to the back of your mind.

>You whisk about the streets much like the morning breeze, quiet and seemingly inconsequential.

>What is there to worry about besides your job in the morning, the food on your table or the kids in school?

>Not many see the overarching pattern of the world in their day to day lives.

>A single slip can bring the unthinkable.

>Well, it brings you at least.

 

>Part of this could be explained by the timing of things.

>Tomorrow is home to a celebration of national scope.

>You never understood the fascination of such affairs, even in…

>Hmm, lost your train of thought there, odd.

>Nevertheless what is it that the ponies of Equestria call it? The Summer’s Set Celebration?

>It doesn’t sound quite right, but it’s their holiday, not yours.

>The only holiday you get is New Year’s, and that’s only because it’s the busiest day for you.

>How does that even work? Aren’t holidays supposed to- There you go thinking again.

>But it’s been a long while since you’ve had a day off. Perhaps…

>No, you couldn’t just stop. Does gravity just stop?

>Maybe not, but perhaps you could… Push the thoughts aside.

>Just for a little bit. Can’t let something like this become a habit.

>You hear a high pitched whistling sound as you think of something to do, a Pegasus shooting down the street and back into the sky.

>She’ll do.

 

>You’ve seen this one before many a time, though she has a habit of darting out of your sight, as is her nature.

>She seems to enjoy the thrill of flight, which to you might seem a bit rudimentary given that it’s as natural to her kind as magic is to unicorns.

>Maybe if one of the earth ponies had been granted such a privilege they would feel in such a way, but with her it is most certain a curiosity.

>The Pegasus hits top speed and begins flipping around in a display that makes has a tantalizing effect.

>She’d blend right into the sky if not for her mane, that rainbow blend that she so prominently presents.

>Her colors coat the sky in such a way that you’re unsure if she wasn’t plucked right out of its being at birth.

>Her skill is certainly a thing to admire, even as natural as it may be she must be among the fastest flier you’ve seen thus far.

>Maybe not skilled, but she’s certainly one of the quickest.

>The Pegasus sighs as she rests atop a cloud over the town, “Feels good being the best.”

>And she lost the appeal.

 

>Her coat shimmers with the sweat she’s earned from her extensive routine and she’s panting like a dog.

>You’ve seen her outperform this occasion without so much as a deep breath.

>Could it be she doesn’t wish for others to see her vulnerability?

>Or is it she’s been out of practice for some time and is trying to relive past glory?

>But there you go with your rambling theories. Ain’t no one got time for that.

>Her wings shiver abruptly as she gets back on her hooves and flares her wings, sailing off back down towards the ground.

>You follow just overhead from a bird’s-eye view until she lands on the ground, the mare flicking her mane to the side.

>She sticks her chest up and strides through town, earning attention from the stallions wherever she goes.

>By the grin on her face you assume she enjoys their interest, though she doesn’t seem to be the type who’d act on it.

>A Pegasus filly too seems quite infatuated with the mare, almost as if she were the coolest p0ny in the whole world.

>To which she’s quick to agree.

 

>The two of them laugh and she sends the little one scampering off away and back into the crowd.

>You know that you said she lost her appeal, but you can’t help but feel you were wrong.

>Despite the cockiness you can’t help but feel a little interested yourself after all.

>Her skill and bravado are of the highest prize, yet she seems mysterious somehow.

>In a way she reminds you of the drunk you had met earlier.

>Not in a bad way of course, but one where they’ve piqued your attention.

>Few have ever done so, and none yet have broken your streak of neutrality.

>You’ve kept a front of disinterest with most affairs, but every now and then p0nies like her show up.

>Maybe… Maybe just a glimpse.

>One little peek won’t hurt after all.

>The mare looks back behind her almost as if she knew you were watching.

>Those cerise eyes hit the sun just right as they glimmer beneath the rays.

>She’s got something going for her.

>Zero.

 

>She winks and darts back into the sky before her leaving behind a gradually fading rainbow.

>That… can’t be right. She seemed so happy.

>Aren’t they all? Most never see that train before it’s too late.

>You have to see this personally, and you hover back beside her as she roars past the tree line.

>How does it happen? Does she clip her wing and fail to land properly?

>She explodes right out of the branches without a trace of damage and only continues picking up speed.

>The intensity of her flight even has you a bit worried. Could you warn her-

>No! That’s beyond question. You have one rule and one rule only, no interfering with the lives of the living.

>There is an order in this world and you must adhere to it.

>The last time you tried to help… well, its mark is still laid in stone.

>But look at her. She’s fearless, determined, strong, inspiring.

>Her fellows treat her like a hero.

>How can you be expected to let this happen?

>Because it’s your job.

 

>She twists in and out of a cloud at speeds that’d knock a normal Pegasus unconscious, yet she persists.

>She zooms towards the ground without a chance to pull up, yet she succeeds.

>She does this because she can, and that is what makes her unique.

>It’s a clear shining day and still you have to work, on her no less.

>Maybe you were wrong. It’s entirely possible that…

>Excuses. Why do this to yourself? It’s a part of the circle of life.

>There’s no escaping it, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

>A job’s a job. You have to keep telling yourself that.

>Her nostrils flare as she continues to pick up speed and putting strain on her body.

>She’s going in for another dive and at this velocity she’s not going to make it out.

>This is it. She won’t be able to slow down in time and that’ll be it.

>She hits the throttle and… she makes it, twirling around midair in triumph.

>Well then… Even you can be wrong some-

>Why is she grabbing her chest?

 

>Her breathing is erratic, short to boot, quick inhalations with a side of wheezing.

>This is how it ends huh? No great feat of aerobatics.

>The gleam in her eyes disappears as she clenches them shut, her pain pronounced with the grimace on her face.

>Another ten years at least you’d have guessed at first glance, but this amount of strain… It takes its toll.

>Her altitude begins to drop as her once all-powerful wings begin to fail her until she’s in freefall.

>You’ve heard what they’ve experienced, though you may never know the feeling yourself.

>The world seems to slow to a crawl; every second might as well be an hour in the eyes of those with only a handful left.

>Some say life passes before their eyes. What does she remember? Does she remember?

>And when that fateful moment comes, when her body echoes across the empty plain with a resonating thud, that’s when they become an eternity.

>Or so they say.

>Her body lies still as she watches a few feet away, no words to speak.

>What does one say to something like this?

“It’s time to go.”

 

>She whirls around, tail swishing behind her, “Who said that?”

>It appears that she is one those. They… don’t deal well with you.

“Confusion is understandable,” she continues to twirl around in confusion.

>”This isn’t funny, whoever you are.”

>Buying time. Trying to delay the inevitable. It’s all the same to you.

>”This is a prank isn’t it? You put something in my food to make me go coo coo in the head didn’t you? Who put you up to this? Was it Pinkie?”

>The first step, Denial. They can’t let the idea of such a thing conflict with their own reality so they reject it.

>But you are real, and you are their reality now.

>She patters her hooves about, her body still lying behind her, alone.

>”Aren’t you going to answer me? I asked you a question!”

“You know the answer.”

>”Don’t toy around with me! I’m- NO! What gives you the right?!”

>Anger, the second stage. When confronted with something you cannot control your temper gets out of hand.

>It never helps.

 

>”This… You’re going to put me back. You’re going to do it, or so help me by Celestia I will end you…”

>A useless gesture. How does one end something like you? You just… are, but she won’t see it that way.

“You’re only hurting yourself.”

>”Buck you!”

>Reasoning never works. You should know that by now. Does one reason with a cobra? Does one negotiate with an Ursa Major?

>She’s rampant, and if she keeps this up she may have another episode.

>This may be the only case where one dies after death, if such a thing could occur.

>You don’t even know her name, yet you can’t help but feel sorry for her.

>It’s true, it’s not fair. No one gave you the right, but it simply must be done.

>To put it in their own words, ‘It’s the way the cookie crumbles.’

>And from the anger comes the soft call you’d expect , “What… what do you want?”

>Stage Three, Bargaining. They look for a loophole in the system, willing to trade anything, Anything, for their own life.

>”Please…”

 

>Stage… She rests on her haunches, moisture gathering in her eyes, her hoof pawing at the ground.

>”I don’t- I always thought I’d have more time, you know? There’s so much more… So much I wanted to do.”

>She sniffs, doing her best to hide her growing emotional distress but also failing.

>”If there’s any part… any part of you that understands… I don’t want this.”

>Depression is often the hardest to go through, mainly for the departed.

>Why is it that you’re the one feeling down? It’s not- You have a job to do.

>How long are you going to hide behind that excuse? As long as it takes.

>You’re going to watch her go through- Yes you are, it’s your- Job.

>A strange feeling hits your center. Is this pain?

>These thoughts… Why must they conflict in such a manner?

>And almost like a fog has been lifted do you make realize what you must do.

>Or rather, what you want to do.

“What are you willing to give?”

>Her eyes shoot back up with a sprinkle of hope locked deep inside, “Anything. Anything at all.”

>Truth lies heavy on her tongue. So it shall be.

 

>Taking a soul is one thing, returning it is another.

>Some things you were never meant to do, and this fits in there quite well.

>You focus as you begin to guide her soul; calming whispers to her all the while you handle this delicate surgery.

>You surge forth with an electric shock, the mare’s body jolting upright and taking a deep breath.

>She looks to her hooves, then around the plain, finding only herself.

>Could she be thinking it was all a dream? That it was a figment of her imagination?

>”Are… are you still there?”

>Your senses come rolling back, but it’s too late. The deed is done and you…

>New Years… Maybe it’s time you change that…

>She gets back to her hooves, testing her wings and prodding her chest.

“Rest, and you’ll be fine.”

>She grows still, the illusion she built shattering under your voice, “You…”

“You said you’d give anything for this chance. Well, I have one condition.”

>She merely nods hesitantly, clearly hoping you’d let her off easy.

“You’re taking me with you.”

 

>”W-with me?” her hooves begin to tremble, “You don’t mean…”

>She swallows hard as you watch her.

>Fear is understandable to be sure, after all… It’s not every day that an invisible force of nature wishes to tag along with you.

>”I don’t- think I’d be comfortable with you, um…”

>It suddenly occurs to you why she seems so hesitant.

>It is not solely your company she fears, but the manner of which you join with her.

>If you were to see the world you’d do it with your own, eyes.

>Such a trivial detail, those two rounding features. The doorway to the soul.

>You’ve seen more of the world than any breathing creature in this land, yet still, you exist blind.

>”Hello?”

>The wind draws heavy as the Pegasus braces herself and clenches her eyes.

>Her mane flicks violently in the breeze, the air twirling before her, funneling upwards into the sky.

>You feel a tingle run through you as the tower of quickened air closes upon you.

>The sensation festers, crawling over you as it reaches the tips of your, fingers.

>So, it shall be.

 

>The world darkens, a lasting blackness that encompasses all of your being.

>A whistle, the breeze as it cuts through the open void and to your senses, a sharp whistle.

>You feel the twirling funnel begin to die, the shrill calming to a subtle whisper that begs for your attention.

>And beneath the sound of nature lies a soft breathing you never thought to notice, the way it reaches through time and onto the skin.

>”What are you?”

>A sliver of light breaches the darkness, the eyes so foreign to you pried open to release the intense glow.

>You find a dull pain hum behind your eyes much as newborn would.

>”Can you hear me?”

>You pick up the sounds and nod your head, the manifestation unwieldy without practice.

>Slacks, black in color, the grass clings onto the fabric helplessly, a faint brown forming along the edges.

>Your face moves up, struggling through the glaring show of light where you see the Pegasus, eyes wide.

>”Hello?”

 

“Good day.”

>You place your hands on the ground and push upwards with your legs until you’re standing upright.

>The... balance isn’t quite right. You’re sure you’ll get used to this over time however.

>A fresh brush of air caresses your cheek and you hold onto the spot as if to capture the moment.

>So this is how it feels… You move your hand away, the green almost blending into the lush plain.

>”Shouldn’t you be a p0ny?”

>The shade of your skin is a curious feature though you’re not sure why it strikes you so.

>The veins shift under your skin as twiddle your fingers, the crack of a smile crossing your face.

>How does one describe the sensation? After all this time, all the ages…

>But one thing still eludes you. The beat in your chest, that soft inhale, the warmth in your veins.

>To be alive. An elusive feeling to be sure.

>You turn to the cyan Pegasus, her body trembling worse than yours.

“Yes?”

 

>”I asked you, a question.”

>Did she? You do not recall- Oh yes she did. You were preoccupied in thought to notice.

“Yes. Yes you did.”

>The landscape seems so different from this point of view. You can almost reach out and-

>”Well?”

>Before you had only yourself to blame for loss of thought, now it seems an avatar exists for your displeasure.

“Yes?”

>She stammers at your response, “Why aren’t you- you know, a pony?”

>You overview your lengthy appearance, the simple yet professional business suit untouched by the elements.

“Does this form displease you?”

>”Well,” she crosses her legs, “I thought you’d be-“

“A p0ny?”

>”Well yes.”

>She thought you to be an equine?

“Why?”

 

>She cocks her head slightly, “Why what?”

>You move behind her, eyes north in search of the town.

“Why?” you glance back, “Why must I appear as a p0ny?”

>It is not an unfair question is it? Merely one of curiosity.

>”I- I don’t know. I just thought…”

>Her imagination had concocted a mental image of what you might appear to be.

>A barebones skeleton in robes perhaps? Or maybe a horned demon of some sort, spaded tail included.

“Thinking. How long I’ve had time to think.”

>But that time is past. You’ve sat on the sideline too long and let this place pass you by.

“Some things one must experience, not ponder.”

>The Pegasus skeptically moves to your side, your towering figure putting additional fear into her.

“You’d do well to know that, but I’ve spoken too much. This is the way to ‘Ponyville’ is it not?”

>She nods and stands her ground, your gaze slowly shifting down to her.

>She almost flinches when she meets you and moves ahead, you at her flank.

>"My name's Rainbow Dash by the way."

"Pleasure."

>This isn't so bad a start. What could go wrong?