- >Take your fluffy pony to an amusement park
- >The name or Midwestern city it's located in is unimportant
- >You ask your fluffy what he wants to do first
- >"Wide bumpy caws!" he says, wagging his tail
- >You head over to the bumper cars and wait in the short line
- >When your turn comes, the ride operator takes your fluffy
- >He places it in a miniature car without a steering wheel
- >Before you can say anything, he hands you a remote control
- >You're then escorted to an area with the other owners
- >The operator explains that you control your fluffy's car
- >The remotes are pretty simple, two sticks and a turbo button
- >With the flip of a switch, the cars are activated
- >Everyone takes it easy, the fluffies find it fun
- >Slowly bumping and giggling
- >It's all so...boring
- >You decide to increase the speed a bit
- >Your pony smacks into another
- >It's owner gets mad and speeds up as well
- >Soon the cars are zooming along, smashing into each other
- >The fluffies are panicking, crying "Wan stop, no wike wide!"
- >Time to try turbo
- >Fluffy's are being ejected on impact now
- >They're getting crushed and dragged by passing cars
- >Red smears run along the track
- >Their screams and cries drown out the music
- >Then the ride suddenly stops, surviving fluffies are returned
- >Owners of dead ones are given coupons
- >Yours managed to survive but he won't stop shivering
- >As they hose off the ride, you ask your fluffy where he wants to go next
- >"Wan go home" he says
- >You laugh, these park tickets are non-refundable
- >He's got a long day of fluffy friendly fun ahead of him
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Bumper cars
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