Title:           /mlp/'s CYOA fanfic 11
Author:          Anonymous
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/VRNuUgg2
First Edit:      Thursday 30th of May 2013 02:24:38 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Thursday 30th of May 2013 02:24:38 PM CDT

>You are anon
>You live in Equestria and tour best friends are the mane 6, they were the only people nice enough to try and not kick you out of Ponyville for being the only human.
>You live a modest life in your own apartment flat, just down the street from Cap'n Falcons Tavern.
>Your at the bar tonight with the girls.
>What are you doing???
 
>Fuck yeah, were drinking, totally original when you're at a bar!
>"Wooooo" you yell as you clime up onto the bar, "tonight is gonna be awesome!" The girls are all laughing at how drunk you are.
>Shy floats over and tries to nudge you off of the bar.
>This only results in you falling to the ground, you make a satisfy thud.
>You stand up as quickly as a drunk man can going, "I'm good!"
>The bar-goers cheer for, only because your that drunk ass at the bar and people only want to see you get hurt.
 
>Anyways, you run!
>You can't beat that!
>You push your way through the crowd of fighting ponies and head for the alleyway by the bar. There thousands of Changlings await your command.
>You are secretly Führer, Kommandeur of Chrysalis's Pony Reich, you've been banging her behind the scenes since she can change into a human.
>You command your men to light the bar ablaze.
 
>Fuck!
>Applejack, that pony that you secretly have the dick sweats for is still trapped inside!
>You must save that sweet peace of flank
>Running inside you desperately search for her.
>Head turning left and right but no luck yet.
>What's this, thar! over yonder it is fair young AJ! She got hit in the head with a wine bottle and is now passed out in a booth.
>you rush to her aid.
>swoop her up in your arms and you make your escape. You salute you're brave men as you pass them on the way out.
>they storm the bar.
 
>You wake up, you're at AJ's house.
>"Anon, you're up!"
>A little to loud, suffering from your hangover.
>Was last night real or was it all just fanta sea?
>"AJ....."
>"Did I suplex you by any chance last night?
>"If you mean suplex as, 'fucked the broad daylights outta me', then yeah, yeah you did."
>You gulp.
 
>It's been swell AJ!, but that's my ride!
>You stumble out of bed and out the front door, AJ runs after you, she's yelling about morning sex or something but you ignore it.
>You'd rather get in your brand-fucking new mecha!
>You slowly make the climb up the left leg into the cockpit.
>You are now DOMON KASSHU! NEO-JAPANS STAR FIGHTER AND THE KING OF HEARTS! You are now an international Gundam fighter and you're off to make a name for yourself as well as defeat the Dark Gundam who....WITH THE HELP OF KIOJI!!!!! has begun infecting innocent people with DG Cells. You just gotta stop him!
 
>you wake up to see the horrilbe aftermath of the war.
>You are the last one standing for your right for freedom.
>there is only one of them left as well, she is badly injured and it all comes down to this moment.
>you pull a dagger out of your leg from when you got stabbed before
>you hold the tip of the dagger in your finger tips and slowly walk towards Celestia
>she is panting and trying to get away but she seems to be trapped
"I'm going to end this... for Applejack..."
>You throw the dagger at Celestia hitting her neck
>she pauses in pain for a second then falls/
>you have won this battle... but at what cost
>you look around watching the chaos you created to end this
>you have never felt so sad.
 
"I cannot overstate my laughter"
>You begin to lose your sides.
>You temporarily open your eyes only to find that your display of mirth has caused you to cough up blood
 
>You get that feeling again
>You suddenly need to suplex someone's bitch ass
>You look around you for your first victim
>You realize that everyone died in the battle
>Shit.
>You probably should have thought that one through.
 
>Despite the countless health warnings and PSAs, you decide to stare directly into the sun
>surgeongeneralbedamned,jpg
>You whip out your disco stick
>You twirl that shit like a terrible towel Fuck the Steelers
>You begin to ascend
>Those lesson from Miles Prower were beginning to pay off
>You fly off into the sunset in a very literal way.
 
>You now have a terrible case of skin cancer
>The surgeon general DID try to warn you about that damn sun
>You suddenly realize that Celestia has decided to enact her final revenge
>You have 10 minutes to live
 
>Your time at an end, you decide that now is the time to repent
>You are willing to submit to whatever punishment the fates will upon you
"Applejack, forgive me."
>Your dick goes limp
>Without your helicopter dick to propel you, you begin to enter freefall
>You close your eyes, prepared to meet your doom
>You listen to your oompa-loompas flapping quietly in the wind as you begin to accelerate towards the surface
 
>You begin to fall faster and faster
>Eventually, you hear yourself hit the sound barrier
>Fuck physics, "terminal velocity" is just what the government wants you to think.
>You continue to accelerate
BAM
>You appear to have broken the space-time continuum
>You just KNOW your insurance will skyrocket
>You pass Bill and Ted, the Doctor, and something that resembles a grey hedgehog
>Suddenly, your cancer appears
>It takes the form of a meatball.
"It is time, Anon."
>You get an idea
"Wait... I get to challenge you to a game for my life, right?"
"Uh, yeah, I guess."
"CARD GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES!!"
 
>You draw from your deck.
>Rattata
>Of course
>imfucked.jpg
>But what's this?
>A wild Magikarp appears
>You praise based Faust as you soundly stomp that fucking fish flat
>The carcinogenic meatball loses the first round
>he starts to take off his shirt
>Unfortunately for him, he forgets that he is riding a moving motorcycle
>with no hands on the handlebars, he veers off and crashes
>greatballsoffire.jpg
"That was fast," you think to yourself.
>Everything fades to black.
 
>You awaken on the moon
>Next to filly Luna
>With your dick up her stinker
>You look down to see that you have transformed into Mando
>Chris Hansen arrives
 
>You wake up to find yourself tied to a bed
>You try to scream, but there's something stuck in your mouth
>It's a ballgag
>You look towards the foot of the bed
>It's none other than Sunbutt herself
>She has an Anal Devastator
"Are you ready to be a woman, Anon?"
 
>Suddenly Chrysalis out of fucking nowhere
>She swiftly frees you of your bindings and pins Molestia to the ground.
>You prepare the (Sunny) D
>You wake up
 
>You commit sudoku in order to bring Applejack back to life.
>Realize she was sitting across the room the entire time.
>Fuck.
>You really should have thought that one through
>You die
>You wake up again
 
>You suddenly feel the full power of Rule 63
>You begin to masturbate
>Your fucked up brain creates scat fetish shit involving Big Mac and Twilight
>Nearing climax
>Climax causes heart attack
>You die
 
>You awaken slumped over a toilet in the Men's Restroom at Cap'n Falcon's
>You appear to be in a pool of your own vomit
"Just how much cider did I drink last night?"
>You hear a knock on the door
"Anon, you alright?"
 
>you open the door
>you see a man in a red suit and balaclava with a mask made to look like a Stephenie Meyer novel
>You pull out your scattergun and blast that fucker's head off
 
>You spycrab his ass in the middle of town square
>You hear sirens
>OHSHITITSTHEFUZZ.exe
 
>You unleash your ogre power
>Suddenly Derpy Hooves
"Shrek is drek."
You have died.
 
>Your Y chromosome is now an X chromosome
>Your rage builds
>Seth and Merriwether look in awe as you become the FaustHulk
>You take the chance to acquire new weapons
>bedtimeforseth.mp4
>You lay waste to the law with your clubs of +3 Faggotry
>Wanted level 5
>You go to lay waste to Hasbro's corporate offices
>Robotnik will be avenged
>you beat that thing like a dead horse hue
>Seth and Merriwether are nothing but bloody pulps in your hands
>Your rage decreases
>your Y chromosome has been restored
 
>You quickly abduct the nearest police officer you can
>You attempt to >rape, but she kicks you off
>It's Applejack
"Well, Anon. Trying to pull the ol' suprise buttsecks on me? Let's see how you like it!"
>She levels her pistol at you
>She draws her baton and shows it to you
"D'ya know where THIS goes, sugahcube?"
 
>You spend a moment staring into each other's eyes
>You remember that crazy weekend at the end of senior year
>You slowly draw her into a kiss
>Fade to black