Title:           Pony John talks to the officer
Author:          Anonymous
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/S0f4fRbX
First Edit:      Tuesday 15th of January 2013 01:22:21 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Tuesday 15th of January 2013 01:22:21 AM CDT

zachownzzz:  hi
Me:  'sup
zachownzzz:  so hows it going
Me:  I'm bangin every mare I can find.
Me:  What does a red-and-green alicorn like yourself do?
zachownzzz:  well i run the GDI
Me:  GDI?
zachownzzz:  global defense initiative
Me:  What do you defend against?
zachownzzz:  well anything thats evil
Me:  do immigrants count?
zachownzzz:  there not evil
Me:  what about the ones with the towels on their heads
zachownzzz:  as long as they dont kill innocent ponies
Me:  zach I need to tell you somehting
Me:  I did something very evil
Me:  can you forgive me?
zachownzzz:  like what
Me:  I need to know you'll forgive me
Me:  otherwise I can't tell you
zachownzzz:  sorry im a pony of my word to the GDI
Me:  What's the GDI code?
Me:  ok look
Me:  I'll tell you
Me:  but it needs to stay secret
zachownzzz:  ok
Me:  because if ponies were to find out
Me:  something really bad might happen
Me:  can I trust you?
zachownzzz:  sure
Me:  I
Me:  I...
Me:  ...I got sweetie belle pregnant
zachownzzz:  ok your just f***ed up
Me:  did I do something wrong?
zachownzzz:  you got a filly pregnant
Me:  she asked for it though
zachownzzz:  well she is a dum b**** and you do it again there will be a fine
Me:  so it's okay so long as she enjoyed it?
zachownzzz:  well she will be fined and well have to be punished
Me:  Ok then
Me:  I'll tell you the truth
Me:  I didn't get sweetie pregnant
Me:  But I plan to tonight
Me:  And since she's the only one that gets in trouble
Me:  it's cool  
zachownzzz:  wrong
Me:  thank you!
zachownzzz:  well now if you do it before that then your fined
Me:  I thought you said only sweetie gets fined
Me:  for being a slut
zachownzzz:  well you shouldnt of told me the truth
zachownzzz:  and if she did tell you to then your both fined
Me:  oh ok
Me:  I won't get her pregnant
Me:  Can I still make out with her though?
zachownzzz:  that maybe f***ed up to me but you can
zachownzzz:  once she is 18 then you can have sex with her
Me:  ok
zachownzzz:  it wont be the GDI problem if she is 18 and you are
Me:  well I'm 27 and shes 8
zachownzzz:  then your just f***ed up thats all i got to say to both of you
Me:  If you want you can drop by and kiss her too, I won't get jealous
Me:  If you want you can drop by and kiss her too, I won't get jealous
zachownzzz:  let me think about it umm NO!
Me:  ok officer
Me:  thanks for everything!
zachownzzz:  GEN/
zachownzzz:  GEN.
Me:  ?
zachownzzz:  general
Me:  s-sorry GENERAL
Me:  *salutes*
zachownzzz:  *nods his head* dont do anything to piss me off
Me:  SIR, YES, SIR!
zachownzzz:  your not in the military maget
Me:  um... *thinks*... YES MA'AM!
zachownzzz:  THE f*** YOU CALL ME
Me:  I'M SORRY MA'AM IM VERY CONFUSED
zachownzzz:  CALL ME A MARE AGAIN I'LL POINT THIS PISTOL UP AGAINST YOUR f***ING HEAD
Me:  PLEASE DON'T POINT THAT AT MY HEAD ADMIRAL
Me:  I'LL DO ANYTHING
Me:  Y-Y-YOU CAN
Me:  T-TOUCH MMMY FLANK
Me:  JUST DONT HURT ME
zachownzzz:  im a f***ing general for god sack get the f*** out of my sight
Me:  ciao! *disappears*
zachownzzz:  god damn what the f*** is wrong with that dude