Title:           Floataria
Author:          Anonymous
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/YjTiZDDb
First Edit:      Monday 5th of October 2015 04:04:53 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Monday 5th of October 2015 04:04:53 AM CDT

> Be Anon, janitor extraordinaire of CHS
> In the past two years you have seen things
> As such, when a grumpy girl floats by, flapping some folders, you don't make a fuss
> Though you do note that her breasts are absurdly large and unnaturally perky
> It was only a matter of time, when you have girls and magic together
> Might as well get to work
> You close your door behind you and cross the street to the school
> The floating girl notices you
> "Oh, it's you. Could you give me a hand here?"
> Kids these days
"Alright. How you want to do this?"
> She considers this
> "Get me a leaf blower or some rocks or something."
> Reasonable enough
> You jog back to your backyard and grab a few broken bits of a cinder block
> When you return, Area or whatever is resting her arms on her floating mammaries
> "About time."
"Oh, so you didn't want these?"
> You heft the cement pieces
> Maria's frown deepens
> "Look, this hasn't been the greatest morning for me. Cut me some slack, alright?"
> That's probably the best you're going to get out of her
"Alright. How'd this happen anyway?"
> You walk around her, reaching for her backpack
> She turns her head, trying to keep an eye on you
> "You know Twilight? Flat chest, magical?"
> You unzip the main compartment and drop one of the rocks in
"About what I figured, but why you and why are you floating?"
> Amelia rolls her eyes
> "Near as I can tell, it's every girl in the area. As for floating, Twilight just learned about lower back pain, and wanted to solve that. She says the expansion is part of levitation effect, but I think we all know that's bullshit."
> You drop the rest of the chunks of cement in, and her feet hit the ground with a soft tap
> She takes a few experimental steps, looks like the moon landing
> Wario turns and gives you a wave
> "Thanks for the rocks. See you around."
"Right. Just remember to return them when the spell wears off."
> "Yeah yeah, it'd be terrible if you didn't get your rocks."
"Punk."
> She grins and turns away, her hips twitching back and forth as she takes small steps
> Nice
> Still, you don't think you have enough rocks for everyone
> Hopefully the other girls will be more sensible than folder-flapper over there
> ...
> Maybe you can herd them around with a leaf blower...
> Your cellphone rings
> Celestia?
"Hello, this is Anon."
> "Anonymous, I'm afraid we need your help with a delicate matter."
"Yes?"
> "Could you come over and get my sister and I down? We seem to be stuck to the ceiling."
"Right away."
> The Principal and the Vice Principal in pajamas with inflated boobs?
> You wouldn't miss it for the world
 
------------------
 
>"A-Anon, can I get a little help?"
>You look up to see the biggest breasts you've ever seen on a girl.
"Aria? What the fuck, how did your boobs get so amazing?!"
>"Really, that's what you notice? Not me floating in the air? You're such an idiot!"
"That's not how you ask someone for a fav-"
>"ANONYMOUS YOU FUCKING MORON GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!"
"Whoa, fine geez!"
>Jumping up you grab onto Aria's waist, hoping your weight would pull you both down.
>It doesn't work.
 
>Five minutes later you're both floating Ten feet in the air.
"..."
>"Great plan Anon, I can't wait see what you come up with next."
"Well, we'd make a great Macy's day float."
>"..."
"What, no sly re-"
>"Next house we come to that has a mean dog, I'm dropping you onto."
"Fine, I'll be quiet."
 
>And thus, Anon and and Aria drifted off into the sunset; She, quietly fuming, and he happily clinging onto that purple grumps rump.