Title: Hornass (Request) Author: AnontheAnonymous Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/eqWZvMVC First Edit: Thursday 28th of February 2013 09:27:19 AM CDT Last Edit: Thursday 28th of February 2013 09:27:19 AM CDT Anonymous   Dickbutt. Cheese Pizza. Cola. Rainbow shoes.     >Day lazyness in Requestria >You are Anon >Laziest morning man in Equestria >Well the only man in Equestria >You roll off the bed and through the hole you crafted so that you would land right on the couch a floor below you >It works perfectly all the time >Then you roll off the couch and on to the conveyor belt that you had Flutterrapist install >Not like the laziest morning man is gonna do that himself >The conveyor belt takes you into the bathroom and stops while machine arms shave you >One of the machine arms picks you up by the waist and puts you on the toilet >Then it punches you in the stomach, rocketting the shit out of you into the bowl >It flushes and then water squirts up at your butthole, cleaning it >The arms hold you up in the shower while a third one turns the water on >You remain limp as they all wash you and dry you >You are thrown back on the conveyor belt and carried back to your room where the mechanical arms cloth you >Then they drop you down the hole next to your bed so you land on the couch again, fully dressed, shat, showered, and shaved >You jump over the conveyor belt and stretch out Man, being a lazy morning person is a lot of work... >You walk to the fridge and open it to see the most wonderful thing >Cheese Pizza and cola Oh god yess.... >You take them out and put the box on the counter as you eat them chilled slices while chugging the 2 liter bottle >So fucking good >There's a knock on the door Fuck now what... >You put on your Rainbow Shoe and look for the other one Where the fuck did I put it... >There is a squeak noise and you see something blue and rainbow under your table >You pull it out Oh there it is. >You shove your foot into it and it moans loudly and squeezes on your foot >Shoes totally do that >You walk to the door and open it >It's Fluttershy, with a picture in her hooves >"Um, so I was wondering if maybe your fetish was...dickbutt?" >Wat >Wat >Wat Wat. >She turns the picture she has around and it is a pony thing with it's horn coming out of its butt Wait just one fuck... >"What?" Horns are dicks? >"What did you think they were?" >You stare at her >That time at Twilight's...   --Flashback time Motha Fucka--   >You at Twilight's housebrary >In the tree >She asked you to come over so she could try some magical shit on you >Her horn glows and your hair poofs out to an afro Holy shit! That's awesome! >"Thanks Anon." >She makes her horn glow again and it goes away Aw... >"Well...break time. I'm pretty tired right now...can you uh..." Pet you? >Her cheeks turn a shade of light pink >"I told you not to call it that..." Whatever. Get over here! >You throw out your arm as you say that >No chain attached to a blade comes out Darn... >"What?" Oh nothing. >She trots over to you and sits on your lap facing away from you >You run your hand through her mane and she exhales deeply >You pet her for a good few minutes >Then you go up higher once and touch the base of her horn >"Oh yes~" What? >"Oh um...it uh...relieves tension in the m-magic users body when their horn is massaged...but I can't do it properly with hooves. Spike helps me sometimes bu-" I get it. I'll do it. >"Oh okay..." >You grip her horn and she moans >"Yes...harder and stroke it." >Okay? >You grab as hard as you can and slide your hand up >Her body convulses and she moans loudly >Little sparks fly out of her horn and land on you hand >You pull your hand back What is this? >"...what?" >You show her your hand >"Oh that! That's um...candy! Yes sorry I casted a candy spell on accident." Candy? That sounds boss! >You pull your hand in and lick some of it off >It's just like pop rocks! This is awesome! Can I have some more? >"Oh uh...just stroke my horn again like that..."   --Back to the Future--   >You are still standing in the doorway just looking off in the distance >Fluttershy's voice catches you out of your retarded state of mind >"Anon!" >You look down at her Wait, where did my shoe go? >"Y-your shoe?" You hid it didn't you?! >"W-what? I don't know w-what you're talking about!" LIAR! >You grab her by the mane and cunt punt her to the road >You slam your door and search for that other shoe Fucking Fluttershy...