Corps-á-Corps Chapter 1: "Arrival"

>You’re woken from your nap by your dog.

>Mous has his leash in his mouth and is pawing at the door.

“Alright boy. Let me get some shoes on and I’ll take you out.”

>You look for your shoes, but Mous is one step ahead of you.

>He has them in his mouth and is sitting in front of you.

>You take them from him, noting the lack of drool.

>You put them on and get the harness ready.

>You attach the harness to Mous and walk out the door.

>You get to the usual split in the road.

>You decided, instead of your usual route, to take the path that leads to the forest.

>A bit later, it was getting dark and you decided to turn back.

>Shit, can’t see the trail

>You end up wandering for about 2 hours before you decide to make a camp for the night.

>Mous seems worried but is going along with your plan.

“It’s okay boy. I’ll get us out tomorrow morning.”

>He looks at you, and lies down.

>You can read a look of concern on his face.

>You’re too tired to be able to do anything though.

>You lie down, and after a minute, fall asleep.

 

>You are Mous.

>Yeah, you’re the dog now.

>So what?

>You wake up before your master does.

>He’s lazy sometimes but you love him nonetheless.

>You remember his promise to get you guys home in the morning.

>You get up but something’s wrong.

>You fall over.

>Your hind legs are strangely longer than what they used to be.

>You look down when you realize something.

>Color.

>You can see color.

>You knew you didn’t like this forest.

>After a moment you get the hang of the human legs.

>You stumble over to your body and shake you master awake.

>He starts to stir.

 

 

>You start to wake up.

>Something’s shaking you pretty hard.

>It’s probably Mous.

>Oh yeah, you fell asleep in the forest.

“Raghghhhh”

>What.

>Why can’t you speak?

>Come to think of it, why are you so warm?

>You force your eyes open and immediately see something’s off.

>You look down and see Mous’s leg.

>MOUS’S LEG.

>WHY ISN’T YOUR ARM THERE?

>You attempt to stand up in the alien body, but fall over.

>You try again, and after a few moments succeed to stand.

>Having a tail is weird.

>It has a mind of its own.

> You turn around to see if Mous is in your body.

>Only to pass out when you see your body licking its crotch.

 

>You are Mous.

>It’s kind of hard to lick your crotch with such a short tongue.

>Master’s body isn’t that flexible either.

>And his front paws are useless.

>You hear a thud.

>You look up from your crotch, to see your master has passed out again.

“RUF”

>Speaking is weird in this body.

>You walk over to your master and poke him.

>Hey, these paws are good for something.

>You poke him until he moves again.

>He lifts his head to you and starts speaking to you.

>He’s just saying gibberish.

>You look at him and cock your head.

“ARF!”

>He lifts his front paw to his face.

 

>You are Rainbow Dash

>What? Haven’t been introduced in this story yet?

>You have now. And if you do say so yourself, you are one awesome pony.

>You and Twilight are going through the Everfree forest trying to find the strange creature you spotted while flying over head.

“I’m telling you Twilight, I saw something different!”

>“Rainbow, this is the Everfree, a lot of things are different.”

“Well, I don’t know, it seemed like a good kind of different.”

>She sighs and looks like she is about to head back when a bush moves.

>She turns back around and stares intently at the bush.

>You stand on your hind hooves ready to fight whatever came through.

 

>You are now Anon.

>You got the hang of walking with four legs, and are now walking like a boss.

>A boss that trips over his own tail

>Still haven’t gotten the hang of that thing yet.

>You and Mous are walking through a bush.

>You heard talking, so you thought you might be able to get some help.

>You get clear of the bush when you see the source of the voices.

“Ronies!?”

>HEY! YOU SPOKE!

>No, wait, talking ponies are more important than using your dog's vocal cords.

>“Hey, Twilight, dogs aren’t supposed to talk, are they?”

>Mous comes walking up next to you.

>He looks at you before he notices the ponies.

>“What’s THAT?”

>He runs up and tries to sniff the cyan pony’s ass.

>He gets kicked away.

>You stand up on your hind legs and walk to the closest tree.

>You proceed to bang your head against the tree as hard as your dog body will allow.

 

>You are now Twilight.

>Expecting somep0ny else?

>lolnope

>You observe the strange actions of the dog, and the weird creature.

>The creature seems to be behaving like a dog and the dog... a distressed pony.

>You go on a limb, and walk up to the dog.

“Hi... Oh Celestia, I can’t believe I’m doing this, but can you talk?

>It’s too preoccupied with bringing its head against a tree.

>You tap it with a hoof.

>It stops and looks at you.

“Can you understand me?”

>It looks at you, and nods its head.

>It gets back on the ground and grabs a stick.

>It starts drawing something in the ground.

“Letters? I.... Don’t know this language... Wait... That looks like English...”

>This dog... knows an ancient writing language that was presumed dead.

>“Get off of me!”

>You and the dog turn to see Rainbow struggling against that strange thing that came with the strange dog.

 

>You are now Mous.

>This pony smells cool.

>She’s a little mean but you don’t mind.

>You are licking her face but she keeps pushing you away.

>After the third try, you decide to go back to master.

>You walk up to him and see he's talking to the Old Book pony.

>You don't really like that smell.

>You go up to master and sit down, looking expectantly at him.

>He looks confused for a moment before noticing he has the stick.

>He throws it and you chase after it.

>You hear a banging sound as you chase after the stick.

 

>You are Fluttershy.

>I mean... if that's okay....

>You are tending to your animals when something knocks on the door.

>You jump and scream at the top of your lungs.

"Ahhh!"

>“Hey, Fluttershy, it's just me and twilight.

>Oh, it's just Rainbow.

>You open the door and get tackled by a new animal.

>It starts licking you.

"Hi there boy, what's your name?"

>“Ruff!" (Mous!)

"Hi Mous, I'm Fluttershy."

>A dog walks in on its hind legs and pulls Mous off you.

>Hind legs.

"Ummm, why that dog walking on its hind legs?"

>Twilight was the first to answer.

>“Err, well, it seems that it and his pet swapped bodies... I was hoping you would be able to understand what they are trying to say..."

>You nod

>You walk over to the dog.

"So, what's your name?"

>The dog just gives you a deadpan stare.

"It's okay, I can understand you."

>“Ruah ruff" (Yea, right.)

"I can too!"

>“(Wait, what? You CAN understand me. Well then. I'm Anon and the one in my body is my dog Mous.)"

>You turn to the girls.

"His name is Anon, and his dog is Mous. What exactly did you want to know?"

>“Well, first of all, how they swapped bodies."

>You look at Anon.

>“(Don't look at me, I woke up like this.)"

"Did you do something you didn't usually do?"

>“(Well... I took Mous on a different walk route than usual, and we got lost... We ended up sleeping in the forest...)"

"You fell asleep in the Everfree?"

>“(Everfree? Dammit, so I’m really not in Oakland anymore...)"

"Oak...land?"

>“(Yea, knew it, I’m in fucking Equestria. How did I get into a kid's show!?)"

"Kid's show?"

>“(Oh yea, only that pink one knows.)"

"You know Pinkie?"

>“(In a way I know a small amount about all of you)"

"Really? What do you know about me?"

>“(That you are good with animals.)

"Yea... That's about it..."

>“(I need a drink...)

>That last sentence was clear as day.

 

 

>You are now Anon.

>“Water? Certainly! Give me a second.”

>She flutters inside and grabs a bowl, and fills it with water.

>She trots back outside and places it on the ground.

>“Here you go, anon.”

‘“(Thanks.)”

>Not what you really meant, but you were thirsty.

>You look at the bowl, and realize you have NO IDEA HOW TO DRINK WATER.

>“Well, aren’t you going to drink?”

“(Err, I don’t know HOW... New to this dog body... Still can’t control the damned tail.)”

>You shoot the tail a dirty look

>It just wags happily.

>You are brought back to attention when Fluttershy speaks.

>Next time tail... Next time...

>“Oh, it’s simple really: You just lap it up with your tongue.”

“(O...kay...)”

>You bring your muzzle up to the bowl.

>You open your mouth and try drinking the water.

>First attempt, utter failure. Only a little water got in your mouth.

>Second one, water went up your nose.

>Third time’s a charm right? Sure is, you got a good amount of water.

>You start drinking like a boss.

>You finish drinking, and see Mous waiting behind you.

“(I think he wants some too... Get him a cup. He has hands; he can drink it if you teach him.)”

>“Hands..?”

“(Oh yea, hoofs. If you wouldn't mind translating, I would walk him through it. He’s smart. I hope.)

>“Okay...”

>She goes inside and gets a mug.

>She comes back outside after filling it with water.

>You notice they hold mugs in the crook of their hooves.

“(Okay, tell him to hold out his... front paw.)”

>“Okay... Mous.”

 

 

>You are now Mous.

>You are thirsty, but the yellow one wants to talk.

>“Hold out your paw.”

>You do so.

>She puts a cup thing full of water in your paw, and closes your paw.

>Didn’t know your paw could do that.

>“Now what I want you to do is lift the cup up to your mouth and SLOWLY pour some water in.”

>Ruff that.

>You quickly raise the cup to your face and start lapping up water.

>You get barely any.

>How did master LIVE in this body?

>You seem to recall seeing him drink before.

>You try to mimic that.

>You raise the cup slowly this time and put it to your lips.

>You pour some in and lower the cup. You swallow.

>“Good boy!”

 

 

>You are now Twilight.

>You are baffled at how fast that dog learned how to drink out of a mug.

>You’re also confused at how they managed to swap bodies.

>This NEEDS to be reported to Celestia.

“Hey Fluttershy, would you mind following us into town?”

>“Oh, I would love too, but I need to feed the animals first...”

“Well, when you’re done, could you meet us at the Library?”

>“Sure.”

>You nod and turn to Anon.

“Okay, now that I’m sure you can understand me, would you mind following me?”

>“I need to go back to my place for a minute, need to feed tank. I’ll catch you later.”

“*Sigh* Alright Rainbow.

>He nods his head and turned to Mous.

>He walks towards him and pulls his hand.

>Mous dropped the cup, spilling water everywhere.

>Soon, Anon and Mous are at the door next to you.

“Alright, we’ll see you soon Fluttershy.”

>“Bye guys...”

>She gets to work cleaning up the water as you leave.

>The walk to town was... Interesting, to say the least.

>Mous got distracted by a squirrel and nearly ran halfway up a tree before Anon got to him.

>When you actually got into town proper, Mous attracted a lot of stares.

>Not often do you see a bipedal ape walk in and start barking at everything.

>Mous kept running up to random stands, trying to take the food off of them.

>Angry p0nies EVERYWHERE.

>Anon could barely keep up with him.

>Every stall owner yelled at you as you all went by.

>Eventually you ended up at Applejack’s stand...

>Well, at least Mous didn’t take anything...

>But Anon was pretty distressed about his body getting bucked in the gut.

“Oooh nooo, I’m so sorry AJ, I was just taking them over to the library to study them... But it looks like they haven’t eaten all day...”

>“It’s alright Twi, I think I overreacted... Uhh, what’s with that dog? He’s actin a mite strange...”

>You look over towards anon and see that he’s on his hind legs shaking a paw at Mous.

>It’s a strange sight, seeing a St. Bernard stand on its hind legs.

“Oh... yea... It’s a long story... And I don’t really know most of it...”

>“Well, uh, tell me later... These apples won't sell themselves... Speaking of which, here.”

>She tosses you a small bag of apples.

>“This is my apology for bucking that feller in his chest.”

“Thanks AJ, this may help keep him in line...”

>“No problem. Just tell me their deal later on.”

“I’ll be sure to.”

>With that, you get back on track to the library.

>Mous, with the promise of food, kept in line for the remainder of the trip.

>He still stopped at the odd tree every now and then and raised his leg.

>Only to be stopped by Anon.

>By the time you all reached the library his pants were SOAKED in urine.

>They also could be smelled a mile away.

>You refused to let him in until the pants came off.

>Anon was more than happy to help.

 

>You are Rarity.

>You are on your way to visit Twilight and Spike.

>You needed some help gathering gems and Spike was the only one who could pierce the ground with ease.

>You get to the Library and open the door.

“Hello Twilight, it’s good… to see... you...”

>Your eyes fall upon a naked ape thing, and a dog trying pull some sort of clothing off of it.

>Then it hits you.

“WHAT IS THAT SMELL!?”

>Twilight finally notices you.

>“Oh, hi Rarity... You kinda came at a bad time...”

>You see Spike walk toward you.

>“Uhmmm, let's get out of here... It really stinks... And that ape thing keeps trying to lick my butt."

“Uhuh…”

>You’re in a state of shock.

>“Come on Rarity, follow me...:”

 

>You are now Anon.

>And OH DEAR GOD THE SMELL.

>You are trying to get the soiled pants off of Mous when you hear the door open.

>Too busy trying to ignore the HORRID SMELL THAT IS RADIATING OFF OF THE PANTS.

>With each pull, you hear a bigger ripping sound.

>Getting… Closer....

>Just a little more....

>The pants come flying off and hit you in the face.

>OH GOD. NONONONONONONO.

>You run around tripping over your legs, pants still on your snout.

>You run into everything before you find the door.

>You run outside and shake the pants off.

>AIR. YOU CAN BREATH. SWEET SWEET AIR.

>You walk back in the smell lingers.

>Not as bad as it was before, but it was still pretty bad.

>Hey, where’d that purple lizard thing go?

>Think it had a name... Spike?

>Eh, doesn’t matter.

>You hear knocking at the door, and see that the rainbow one is back.

>She trots over to you and raises her hoof.

>You pound it with your paw.

>Normally you would say bro fist complete. Or in this case, bro hoof.

>But you are a dog. WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS.

>You decided to ignore this for now when your new bro backs off waving her hoof in front of her face.

>”You smell, bro”

>You see twilight walk up next to you... with a book... floating in front of her...

>Oh yeah. The show did have magic.

>”Okay... I have been looking... And it seems there is a spell I could use to allow you to speak... But, not with your mouth... More like... Projecting your thoughts into ponies of your choice.”

>You cock your head.

>Her horn starts to glow.

>”You may want to sit down for this; I don’t know what will happen...”

>You sit down, slightly worried.

>A second later a ball of magic comes flying your way.

>It collides with your head, leaving a jolt of pain.

>It’s only for a second, but it was intense.

>You’re on the ground clutching your head with your paws.

>You hear Twilight panicking.

>”Omigoshisheokay?”

>You slowly get to your paws.

”(Ughhh, my head’s killing me...)”

>They all look around, shocked.

>”Hey, who said that?”

“(Said what?)”

>”There it is again!”

>Twilight walk over to you.

>”Is that... You?”

“(Is what me?)”

>”It IS you! The spell worked!”

“(Really? Sweet.)

>”You don’t sound all that excited...”

“(Well, you said that peop-p0nies can hear my thoughts, right?)”

>”Yeah.”

“(Doesn’t that also mean that they can hear the things I don’t want them to?”

>”What? No, only what you choose to broadcast. And if you focus on somep0ny hard enough, you can ‘speak’ only to them. You also can’t read minds.”

>You decide to test this out with RD.

>You focus on her and prepare to send her a message.

“(She’s a NERD!)”

>Rainbow falls to the floor, laughing.

>Twilight has a look of confusion.

>”What’s so funny?”

>”Hehe, nothing Twilight...”

>Twilight shoots you a glare.

>You just thought whistle to everyp0ny

>”Ugh, fine, don’t tell me.”

“(Oh, uh, Twilight, can you like, give me and Mous bath? I can’t do it myself...)”

>”Fine... But you owe me... Tomorrow you have to answer all my questions.”

 

TIME: 15:43

 

>You are now Twilight.

>You have been asked by a sentient dog to give it a bath.

>You might as well, he stinks up a storm...

>”Follow me”

>(Okay, Mous, come on. You’re going to get bathed too. You stink worse than me.)

>Mous just looked around and started barking.

“Come on, follow me... You too Rainbow.”

>Aw, come on, why do I have to help?”

“Because if Mous is like any other dog, he hates baths. You know how hard it is for AJ to give Winona a bath, right?”

>”Ugh, fine!”

>You lead them to the bathroom, and start by giving Mous a bath.

>After about 15 minutes trying to make Mous get IN THE FREAKING BATHTUB, he accidentally knocked RD out, and had to be... Sedated to bathe him.

>“(Uh, is she going to be okay...? Looks like he hit her as hard as my body can... Her wing looks a little fucked up too...)”

“She’s been hit by worse.”

>”(Errr, okay.. If you say so...)”

“Okay, now get in the tub. It’s time for your bath.”

>”(Hehe, sorry for the trouble...)”

“It’s okay, I just wish Fluttershy was here...”

>He jumps into the tub, almost getting you soaked.

>“(Sorry...)”

“It’s okay... Just happy I was able to get a shield up...”

>You get to work on cleaning him when you start to hear music.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0EHi14jkMUs

>Odd. Seems like the spell can also project full songs if the user knows them by heart.

>You need to ask him about this later.

>About ten minutes later, you’re done cleaning him, and are drying him off when you hear a knock at the door.

>Thank Celestia Fluttershy’s here.

“The door’s open!”

>You finish drying Anon and make your way to the main room.

>That’s not Fluttershy...

“Pinkie, what are you doing here?”

>”My Pinkie Sense told me something bad was happening!”

>You cock an eyebrow

“Really now? What happened?”

>”I got an ear flop, knee twitch, and a tail shake! Somep0ny’s gonna get knocked out!”

“Uhh, yeah... Rainbow got hit by a friend...”

>”Ohhhh new ponies?! I have to throw them a party!”

“Nononono, not now Pinkie!”

>As you’re talking to Pinkie, you fail to notice Anon walking out of the bathroom.

>”OHHH WHEN DID YOU GET A DOG TWILIGHT?”

“Huh? What? I didn’t... Oh”

>You spot Anon.

>”(I’m not a dog... Okay, I am... Bu... Ahhhh yea... that’s the spot...)”

>You see Anon on his back, shaking his leg, and his tail wagging approvingly.

>You let out a laugh at the sight.

>You pull yourself together when you hear knocking at the door.

>You walk to the door and open it to see Fluttershy standing there

>”Hello Twilight, I came as soon as I finished feeding the animals... Is everything okay?”

>She starts looking inside to see the giant mess.

>”What happened...?”

>You’re about to reply when you hear stuff falling and breaking.

>A few seconds later you see Mous running out of the bathroom stark naked.

>He runs up to the door, and accidentally kicks Fluttershy, knocking her unconscious and sending her flying a few feet back..

“WHAT THE BUCK!?”

>Mous is on the floor, face to the ground.

>Pinkie hops up next to you.

>”See? I told you somep0ny was going to get knocked out.”

“Aren't you worried about Fluttershy!?”

>”Oh of course not, silly filly, she just got punted!”

>You let out a sigh, “Pinkie, would you mind taking Fluttershy home?”

>”Sure!”

>You watch as Pinkie hops out the door, picks Fluttershy up, and puts her on her back.

“Thank you Pinkie...”

>You shut the door, and make your way to Anon, who’s still on his back.

“I see you’re content...”

>”(I now know why Mous likes it when I rub his belly.)”

>He turns over, and gets up into a sitting position.

>”(Hey, shouldn't we check on RD?)”

“Who?”

>”(Oh, uh, Rainbow Dash. Her name’s kinda long, so I just used her initials.)”

“Okay, I can understand. Just don’t go calling me TS.”

>He lets out a chuckle. “(I won’t.)”

>You and Anon make your way up the stairs to your bed to check up on Rainbow.

>As you get to the bed you can hear her waking up.

>She lets out a small groan “My head’s bucking KILLING me...”

“Take it easy Rainbow... You got hit pretty hard...”

>She rolls out of the bed and stands up.