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Mute Anon: chapter 5

By: An_Irish_Nomad on Aug 21st, 2012 | syntax: None | size: 6.88 KB | hits: 526 | expires: Never

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>It’s been one month since your arrival into Equestria.
>Celestia has already made progress on sending you home. After a long search through the regal archives, she discovered a spell which would allow you to be sent home, given the right astrological conditions. You weren’t going to question how exactly magic worked, but you’d received assurance from Twilight that if the princess said the right planetary conditions needed to be met, then they needed to be met.
>Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Celestia controlled the sun, and her sister controlled the moon, which had blown your mind when Twilight first told you upon your return to P0nyville. You’d felt Celestia’s power when you first met her, but you’d never guessed that she’d be powerful enough to control an enormous, flaming ball of gas millions of miles away.
>In any case, progress had been made. All that was needed was the right conditions, which Celestia guessed correctly to be a few months from now.
>Your horrible luck of waking up in this equine filled world was being balanced out by your incredibly good luck of getting to go home quickly.
>Well, no point lying here in bed thinking about it. Time to earn your daily keep.
>You hoist yourself out of the ill-fitting guest bed and make your way down to the kitchen, making sure not to hit yourself on the low ceiling. Fluttershy was an early riser, and you knew she’d be down here waiting for you.
>”Morning Anonymous!”
>Hnnnnnng
>You didn’t think you’d ever be able to get over the softness of Fluttershy’s voice. Every time you heard it you wanted to pick her up, hold her close and snuggle with her until the end of time, in a completely non-sexual way.
>You kneel down and hug her lightly, before walking over to the kitchen counter where a small bowl of salad was laid out.
>Fluttershy had, upon seeing your canines, asked if you needed some meat in your diet, but you politely refused. You didn’t like the thought of forcing a herbivore to get meat for you, even when Fluttershy insisted that she fed fish to her otters.
>Besides, it was only a few months that you had to live off veggies, it could be worse.
>”So, Anonymous, got any plans for the day?”
>As always, you shake your head.
>”Well, could you do me a favour and pick up some supplies in town. Angel, um… he hid the birdseed again.”
>That little bastard.
>You nod and Fluttershy leaves the kitchen, presumably to find her sack of bits. Fluttershy was pretty poor, you’d come to find out, so Angel better not have stolen the bits as well.
>You should probably get a job as well. You help Fluttershy around her cottage and with her animals, but that doesn’t earn bits for either of you.
>You glumly contemplate the upcoming months as you eat your breakfast. Fluttershy returns not much later, carrying a small sack of coins in her mouth.
>”Thank you so much, Anonymous.”
>You shrug, and finish off your breakfast, before heading upstairs. One quick wash and change of clothes later, and you’re ready to head into P0nyville.
>Something isn’t right.
>You grind to a halt as you walk along the path to P0nyville, your instincts on red alert.
>No-one else was on the path, and the whole area being deathly quiet put you on edge.
>What in the world…
>You kneel down to the ground, examining the path ahead.
>It looks like something is half buried in the ground… should you examine it?
>…
>No. This feels like a trap, and you’d be insane to meddle with it.
>You step off the path and cut through the trees, breaking into a run.
>Behind you came a rustling in the bushes, and you pick up the pace.
>”Brother of mine, we were foiled! Whatever shall we do!” shouted a voice behind you.
>”Don’t just stand there Flim, let’s get him!”
>Nope.avi
>You continue running, the sound of galloping hooves fast approaching.
>Fuckfuckfuck
>Who the hell were these dudes? Why were they chasing you?
>You stumble out the tree line, running desperately for P0nyville, which was still a good distance away…
>You trip over a large rock and collapse to the ground, wincing in pain. The sound of hooves falls silent and you know your chasers are behind you.
>Guess it’s time to face them, then.
>You wheel round to face the p0nies, who appeared to be… barbers? They were dressed peculiarly, and both were unicorns, with hats adorned behind their horns. The only difference between the two was that the one was sporting a moustache, while the other wasn’t.
>”Well done brother of mine, we caught him!”
>”Indeed Flam, that we did. We’re sure to get paid well for this!”
>”How delightful. As always we make a dynamic duo!”
>”That we do, dear brother. Poor Anon, he tried to run…
>”But tripped and fell, and now he’s done…”
>”He came so close, and yet so far…”
>”When it comes to kidnapping, we set the bar!”
>…
>Is this seriously happening?
>Are these two p0nies about to sing about kidnapping you?
>You grab the rock which inconvenienced you in the first place and lob it at the one named Flam, striking him on the nose.
>”Ow!” he yells, taking a step backwards, rubbing his nose with a hoof.
>You take the opportunity to pick yourself up the ground and run forward, before you deliver a right footed kick to his face, as the other brother yells in surprise.
>They’re going to regret underestimating you.
>You wheel round and duck as Flim launches a blast of magic at you, before swinging a right hook at him.
>You had the size and strength advantage, and Flim is sent sprawling.
>You turn back to Flam, who is slightly dazed, and you grab his head. You slam it into the stony ground repeatedly, until you’re certain he’s not to be going anywhere soon.
>You hear the gallop of hooves and you turn round to face Flim, who is running back in the direction from which you came. You sprint after him, losing ground as he flees you.
>You chase him back to where you started running, and in his haste he forgets about the little trap he set. With a “ding” it goes off, a net encasing Flim who tumbles to the ground. What an idiot.
>Your pace slows to a walk as you casually approach the struggling unicorn, whose eyes are now filled with fear.
>”Oh… oh dear…” His horn begins to glow and you quickly stomp on his head, his cries of pain ringing out.
>”L-look dear fellow. This is nothing personal between you and the Flimflam brothers. Blueblood, Princes Blueblood, he put a very nice price on you if we brought him to you. Flam and I have fallen on some rough times lately… you understand, don’t you?”
>You answer him with a crushing stomp to the face, and blood spurts from his nose, giving you a sick sense of satisfaction.
>Blueblood eh… you hadn’t heard of that name before. Looks like you had some investigating to do.
>One thing is for sure though; he’s going to learn what happens when you fuck with Anonymous, the hard way.

create a new version of this paste RAW Paste Data

>It’s been one month since your arrival into Equestria.
>Celestia has already made progress on sending you home. After a long search through the regal archives, she discovered a spell which would allow you to be sent home, given the right astrological conditions. You weren’t going to question how exactly magic worked, but you’d received assurance from Twilight that if the princess said the right planetary conditions needed to be met, then they needed to be met. 
>Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Celestia controlled the sun, and her sister controlled the moon, which had blown your mind when Twilight first told you upon your return to P0nyville. You’d felt Celestia’s power when you first met her, but you’d never guessed that she’d be powerful enough to control an enormous, flaming ball of gas millions of miles away. 
>In any case, progress had been made. All that was needed was the right conditions, which Celestia guessed correctly to be a few months from now. 
>Your horrible luck of waking up in this equine filled world was being balanced out by your incredibly good luck of getting to go home quickly. 
>Well, no point lying here in bed thinking about it. Time to earn your daily keep.
>You hoist yourself out of the ill-fitting guest bed and make your way down to the kitchen, making sure not to hit yourself on the low ceiling. Fluttershy was an early riser, and you knew she’d be down here waiting for you.
>”Morning Anonymous!”
>Hnnnnnng
>You didn’t think you’d ever be able to get over the softness of Fluttershy’s voice. Every time you heard it you wanted to pick her up, hold her close and snuggle with her until the end of time, in a completely non-sexual way.
>You kneel down and hug her lightly, before walking over to the kitchen counter where a small bowl of salad was laid out. 
>Fluttershy had, upon seeing your canines, asked if you needed some meat in your diet, but you politely refused. You didn’t like the thought of forcing a herbivore to get meat for you, even when Fluttershy insisted that she fed fish to her otters.
>Besides, it was only a few months that you had to live off veggies, it could be worse.
>”So, Anonymous, got any plans for the day?”
>As always, you shake your head.
>”Well, could you do me a favour and pick up some supplies in town. Angel, um… he hid the birdseed again.”
>That little bastard.
>You nod and Fluttershy leaves the kitchen, presumably to find her sack of bits. Fluttershy was pretty poor, you’d come to find out, so Angel better not have stolen the bits as well.
>You should probably get a job as well. You help Fluttershy around her cottage and with her animals, but that doesn’t earn bits for either of you.
>You glumly contemplate the upcoming months as you eat your breakfast. Fluttershy returns not much later, carrying a small sack of coins in her mouth. 
>”Thank you so much, Anonymous.” 
>You shrug, and finish off your breakfast, before heading upstairs. One quick wash and change of clothes later, and you’re ready to head into P0nyville.

>Something isn’t right.
>You grind to a halt as you walk along the path to P0nyville, your instincts on red alert.
>No-one else was on the path, and the whole area being deathly quiet put you on edge.
>What in the world…
>You kneel down to the ground, examining the path ahead.
>It looks like something is half buried in the ground… should you examine it?
>…
>No. This feels like a trap, and you’d be insane to meddle with it. 
>You step off the path and cut through the trees, breaking into a run.
>Behind you came a rustling in the bushes, and you pick up the pace.
>”Brother of mine, we were foiled! Whatever shall we do!” shouted a voice behind you.
>”Don’t just stand there Flim, let’s get him!” 
>Nope.avi
>You continue running, the sound of galloping hooves fast approaching. 
>Fuckfuckfuck
>Who the hell were these dudes? Why were they chasing you?
>You stumble out the tree line, running desperately for P0nyville, which was still a good distance away…
>You trip over a large rock and collapse to the ground, wincing in pain. The sound of hooves falls silent and you know your chasers are behind you.
>Guess it’s time to face them, then. 
>You wheel round to face the p0nies, who appeared to be… barbers? They were dressed peculiarly, and both were unicorns, with hats adorned behind their horns. The only difference between the two was that the one was sporting a moustache, while the other wasn’t.  
>”Well done brother of mine, we caught him!”
>”Indeed Flam, that we did. We’re sure to get paid well for this!”
>”How delightful. As always we make a dynamic duo!”
>”That we do, dear brother. Poor Anon, he tried to run…
>”But tripped and fell, and now he’s done…”
>”He came so close, and yet so far…”
>”When it comes to kidnapping, we set the bar!”
>…
>Is this seriously happening?
>Are these two p0nies about to sing about kidnapping you?
>You grab the rock which inconvenienced you in the first place and lob it at the one named Flam, striking him on the nose. 
>”Ow!” he yells, taking a step backwards, rubbing his nose with a hoof.
>You take the opportunity to pick yourself up the ground and run forward, before you deliver a right footed kick to his face, as the other brother yells in surprise.
>They’re going to regret underestimating you.
>You wheel round and duck as Flim launches a blast of magic at you, before swinging a right hook at him.
>You had the size and strength advantage, and Flim is sent sprawling.
>You turn back to Flam, who is slightly dazed, and you grab his head. You slam it into the stony ground repeatedly, until you’re certain he’s not to be going anywhere soon. 
>You hear the gallop of hooves and you turn round to face Flim, who is running back in the direction from which you came. You sprint after him, losing ground as he flees you.
>You chase him back to where you started running, and in his haste he forgets about the little trap he set. With a “ding” it goes off, a net encasing Flim who tumbles to the ground. What an idiot.
>Your pace slows to a walk as you casually approach the struggling unicorn, whose eyes are now filled with fear.
>”Oh… oh dear…” His horn begins to glow and you quickly stomp on his head, his cries of pain ringing out. 
>”L-look dear fellow. This is nothing personal between you and the Flimflam brothers. Blueblood, Princes Blueblood, he put a very nice price on you if we brought him to you. Flam and I have fallen on some rough times lately… you understand, don’t you?”
>You answer him with a crushing stomp to the face, and blood spurts from his nose, giving you a sick sense of satisfaction. 
>Blueblood eh… you hadn’t heard of that name before. Looks like you had some investigating to do. 
>One thing is for sure though; he’s going to learn what happens when you fuck with Anonymous, the hard way.

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