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Cutie Mark Crusaders, and the search for Anonymous' body CH4

By: An_Irish_Nomad on Feb 1st, 2013 | syntax: None | size: 30.61 KB | hits: 252 | expires: Never

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>The silence of the night surrounds you, interrupted only by your desperate sprint.
>Where the hell is the path? How did you miss it?
“Can’t stop to chide myself… must get help…” you pant, joints aching from the effort of running.
>Suddenly, your foot catches on a treacherous root, wrenching it out of its socket whole.
“Gah! Son of a…”
>You grasp your femur, wincing in pain, before tugging it out of its ensnarement, and twisting it back into its joint.
>Every delay, every holdup, every second you spent dawdling around… just another second for that spider to find the crusaders.
>”Unless it found them already…” Your psyche taunts.
>You grit your teeth and begin running, but guilt isn’t something you can easily outrun… >Grim images of the fillies’ fate dance at the edge of your conscious, only serving to speed up your determined sprinting.
>Soon enough, the tree-line begins to thin out, the dense rows of foliage spacing out.
“Almost at the edge… just one… more… minute…”
>With a triumphant cry, you break through the tree-line, coming to a bedraggled standstill.
>You sway on your feet, gasping at their pain, oblivious to the world around you.
>When you finally begin to think clearly, a number of nearby voices grabs your attention.
>”C’mon Rainbow Dash, get back on yer hooves already!”
>”My head… oh god my head… buck!”
>Suddenly cautious, you creep along the bushy path, senses on full alert.
>”Goodness gracious, it’s awfully ragged out here. Are you sure they came out here?”
>”Ah told ya, Rarity. We checked every other place in town an’ they ain’t nowhere to be found.”
>”I dare hope that Sweetie Belle had enough sense to avoid the Everfree, of all places! It is not the place for a mare such as her… or a mare like me, for that matter!”
>”Quit yer whinin’, it ain’t the first time y’been out here!”
>Now more curious then cautious, you skulk through the undergrowth, separating the folds off the bush in front of you…
>Three ponies stood there, each distinct in their own way. One was an orange earth pony, hair tied up and adorned with a battered Stetson hat: another was a white-as-snow unicorn with a flowing, flamboyant mane that commanded your attention. The third was a cyan-blue pegasus with a particularly prismatic mane: she (at least you assumed it was a she) was curling up on the ground, clutching her head in obvious discomfort.
>”Why did I have to come…?” she moans, face buried in the ground.
>”Cause yer Scootaloo’s idol an’ all, that makes you responsible for her!” the earth pony mutters, glancing at the Everfree.
>Scootaloo… Sweetie Belle… they know the fillies, but what is the connection?
>Your jaw suddenly drops.
“Sisters…”
>”What was that?” the unicorn asks, jumping in fright.
>Oh dear, that was not meant to happen…
>”Ah don’t know, but it sounded like it came from that bush!”
>You panic, backing off from the bush as the ponies near it
>You are so screwed, once they find out you left their sisters in that calamitous cave…
>They’re about to find you… might as well try and give them a good first impression.
>You peek round the bush… only to stare right into a pair of magenta eyes, inches away from yours.
>”What the… damn, I really did drink too much.”
“I, uh… hello?”
>The eyes blink once, before the pegasus recoils in horror.
>”What the buck! That’s not a hallucination!”
>You stand up straight as the ponies surround you, their eyes filled with suspicion.
>”What in tar-nation!”
“Now, let’s all be calm, sensible adults now-“
>Your plea is met by a two-hoofed kick from the earth pony, and you fly back in pieces.
“I suppose that was to be expected, but god DAMMIT that hurt!”
>”Applejack! How rude can you be, kicking a person not two seconds after you meet them?”
>”Person? Rarity darlin’, I don’t know if you noticed, but he’s a talkin’ skeleton! There’s a world o’ things wrong with that!”
>”He didn’t threaten us, nor raise his hoof to attack! A little courtesy goes a long way, Applejack!”
>Your skull is suddenly lifted off the ground, surrounded by a magical aura, and you look the ponies squarely in the eye.
“Thank you… Rarity…”
>”Not a bother, my dear. Not all of us are as brash as Applejack here. Now, who might you be?”
“My name is… Anonymous.”
>”Anonymous? Seems rather tacky for a title, but if that’s your name…”
“It didn’t use to be that, but that’s a rather long story… in the meantime, could you give me a helping hand and put me back together?”
>”Of course darling, just tell me what goes where and you’ll be back on your feet in no time!”
>Over the course of the following minutes, Rarity painstakingly pieces you back together, as Applejack tries to make small talk.
>”So, uh… sorry bout that whole ‘kicking you into pieces’ business. Ah ain’t usually one to panic-“
“Don’t worry about it, some just find me to be too spooky. And who can blame them, in all honesty? Just don’t make dismantling me a common occurrence, and we’ll be as jolly as can be!”
>As Rarity fiddles about with your lower torso, tongue bitten in concentration, you turn your head to the pegasus of this particular trio.
“And may I have the pleasure of knowing your name?
>”Rainbow Dash.” She mutters sullenly.
“Oh. Well, it’s certainly fitting… is something wrong? Have I offended you so?”
>”No. Too much cider.”
“Ah, been tipping back the bottle too much! I understand!”
>”So loud… uh…”
>She buries her head between her wings, in a strange self-cuddle.
“Well, uh… best of luck recovering, I suppose!”
>Rarity suddenly yells in triumph, as your foot spasms.
>”And there we go! An expert reconstruction, if I do say so myself!”
>You tentatively wiggle your toes and fingers, before energetically raising your arms and legs.
“Perfect, absolutely perfect! I feel even better than I did before-hand, how did you do such an expert job?”
>”Yeah Rarity, where in Equestria didya learn how t’reconstruc… reconstr… rebuild a skeleton?”
>”Darlings, please. If I can assemble the Grand Galloping Gala dress of Celestia herself the night before the event, with nothing more than a pair of broken scissors, a rusty frying pan, 200 rolls of silk and a bottle of Applejack Daniels… repairing a charming skeleton on an early morning on the outskirts of the Everfree is a breeze!”
>You stand up straight, stretching out s your joints pop.
“Ah, that feels heavenly.”
>”You’re welcome!” Rarity giggles, her mane bouncing. “I may be generous through and through, but I’ll need you to return the favour right now. We’re in a bit of a… situation, so to say.”
>You sigh.
“I’m afraid I know much more about this than I ought to… the cutie mark crusaders, yes?”
>Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash pause as you reveal your knowledge of the moment.
>”You know about Sweetie Belle and the others?”
“Well… yes. I do.”
>”You know where they are right now?”
“I… oh jeez, this isn’t good.”
>Rarity’s smile and demure hardens into a stoic stare.
>“What do you mean ‘this isn’t good’?”
“Well, I…” You gulp. “They may currently be down in a cave deep within the forest, being stalked by a gargantuan arachnid-“
>”May be? They MAY BE trapped in a cave?” Rarity yells.
“Ok, they’re definitely in the cave!”
>”And you just abandoned them there? You didn’t even try to rescue them!”
“What could I do? If one kick from a waist-height pony shatters me whole, do you think I can stand up to a spider that fills the whole tunnel-“
>”Both of you, cut it out!” screams a voice, and the pair of you cease your bickering.
>Rainbow Dash, looking as tattered as a boxer following a pugilism bout with his rival, steps between the two of you.
>”Scootaloo, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle are trapped right now! We can beat Anon’s flank till it turns red, but that can come after we rescue them!”
>Rarity glares at you, before huffing.
>”The Everfree, it’s always the bloody Everfree…”
>Applejack starts marching towards the tree-line.
>”Anonymous, you’re gonna lead us to this cave, and ah hope for your sake that they’re still ok.”
“I wasn’t cutting my losses and running you know… I came out to get help!”
>”Then we’ll just have t’see if your gamble was worth it… now get runnin’!”
>Ignoring the well deserved glares from the ponies, you start running for the cave, the ponies hot on your heels.
>”Anonymous! Why were the crusaders with you anyway?” Rarity yells.
“I… I was going to help them find treasure…”
>”And why of all places in Equestria did they gallivant down a cave?”
“No idea…”
>Rarity stares at you, before huffing.
>”Very well then… pick up the pace already!”
>You gulp and will yourself to sprint faster, suddenly terrified of the classy mare behind you.
>You shortly arrive at the cave, the ponies exhausted but determined.
>”So this here’s th’cave?”
“Correct, Applejack.”
>She silently stares down into it, before turning back to you.
>”Y’can go first.”
>Your jaw hinges open as you prepare to argue, before you sigh.
“Very well.” You say, before vaulting down.
>Your bony feet land with an echoing thud, and you feel yourself clench with fear.
>”Come on y’all, let’s follow him already!”
>A second later, the trio of siblings begin to make their way down the steep entrance.
>Rainbow Dash fumbles, blinking with almost comedic surprise, before tumbling down to the ground.
>You scramble forward to catch her, the lightness of the Pegasus catching you off guard.
“Gotcha!”
>”Ooof!” She wheezes, rubbing her sore sides.
“You can thank me for that premature injury averted! Though if I may be so rude, I’m surprised to see such an acrobatic animal as yourself floundering like a fish out of water.”
>”Buddy, my head feels like I just went five rounds with Iron Will and lost. Don’t yap at me unless you feel like giving Rarity another assembling job to do.”
“Your less-than-subtle threat has been duly noted”
>You gently set Rainbow Dash down onto the floor, and she shivers.
>”By Celestia your hands feel weird. So thin and… bony…”
>”How insightful, Rainbow Dash. If you’re done with your intrinsic commentary into the situation, could we please hurry up and find the crusaders?”
>Rainbow Dash shrugs off Rarity’s rant, as she turns to you.
>”Well Anonymous, how do we find the crusaders now? Did you know what path they took?”
“I, uh… I’m, not sure how far into the cave they went. I kind of, er, fell into that hole there.”
>”Wonderful, truly exemplary.” Rarity mutters sarcastically. “This fills us with so much confidence…”
>A slight flickering grabs your attention, and you see a firefly struggling to free itself from a nearby web.
>A grim idea suddenly hits you.
“I know how we can follow the crusader’s trail!”
>”How?” Applejack asks incredulously.
“By following the firefly trail.” You reply, with almost sick satisfaction.
>”Hmm… ah suppose that could work.”
“I’ve no better idea for finding them, do you?”
>”No, ah don’t.”
“Well then, let us carry on!” you say, marching towards the side tunnel which the crusaders must have taken.
>”You best let me take the lead, Anonymous.” Rarity says as she marches forwards with a glowing horn.
“Er, very well then. Let us make haste!”
>The three of you begin to explore the tunnel, fireflies periodically marking your route.
>”Uugh! I got cobweb in my wings!”
>”Gosh darnit Rainbow Dash, wouldya be quiet fer one moment? You’re gonna let that spider find us!”
>”I must agree, these tunnels are a nightmare for my hair!”
>You sigh to yourself, cupping your empty eye sockets with your hand.
“All of you be quiet!” you hiss, and the three ponies turn on you in unison.
>”Don’t you shush me! You’re the one who got them and us into this tomfoolery!” Rarity snaps, her horn’s glow wavering.
“And I’m doing my damnedest to get them back out of this ruckus, despite your verbal undermining!”
>”Oh, why… you did NOT just-“
>A sudden, faint cry cuts the both of you off, as you freeze in place.
“W-what was that?”
>”That… sounded like Sweetie Belle!” Rarity cries, eyes widening.
“Oh, blast it! Come on, we have to move NOW!”
>You break into a sprint, your bones’ creaking being drowned out by the hurried hoofbeat behind you.
>Careering down the stony path, you sprint towards the source of the scream. You suddenly grind to a halt as the path splits into a six-way junction, each route as likely as the other.
>”Why’d you stop!” Rainbow Dash pants, coming to a shaky stop.
“This… BUGGER of a path… I don’t know where to go!”
>You kneel down and cup your head in frustration, before punching the ground.
“Dammit! Dammit, dammit, dammit-“
>”Uh, Anonymous!”
>You glance upwards, your teeth gritted in anger.
“What? There’s nothing that can be done!”
>Applejack silently points to the firefly that had deftly landed on your hand, and you gape at it.
“It… which tunnel did it come from!”
>”Far left!” Rarity shouts, and you scramble to your feet.
“Well, uh… I apologise for that little outburst, but… let’s just go!”
>You resume your hurried chase, rocketing down the far left path, feeling rather stupid at your own dramatics.
>Another shrill cry spurs you on, this time coming from much closer.
>A few minutes, you and the ponies burst into an open section of the cave. Along the back wall, the clearing opened up into what appeared to be a huge tunnel plummeting downwards, and strung along the adjacent wall…
>”Rarity!” Sweetie Belle screams, struggling to free herself from the silky spindles that were securing her to the wall.
>Rarity gasps. ”Sweetie Belle! Applebloom! Scootaloo! Oh thank goodness that you’re all safe!”
>Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash rush over to the wall, tugging on the bonds binding the crusaders.
>”Come on!” Applejack grunts, wrestling with the fibrous webbing. “Darn… stupid… spiders!”
>You approach the crusaders cautiously, your senses on full alert.
“I am relieved to see you all well, but we heard screaming not a few minutes ago. What happened?”
>”The spider just left us here and crawled away!” Scootaloo exclaims as Rainbow Dash struggles to free her.
“It just left you here? That is bad… I can’t help but feel that this may be a-“
>From behind you, a sickening and sticky sound emanates, like something crawling down a web-covered wall…
“Trap.” You finish, your long-gone muscles tensing in fear and anticipation.
>The fillies’ eyes widen in fear, their sisters turn round, and you gulp.
“It’s right behind me, isn’t it?”
>The six ponies all nod in terrified unison, and you sigh.
“Then I best do something brave!” you cry, cupping your fist as you wheel round.
>You barely have time to examine the spider before your fist strikes it in the face, causing to stagger back in surprise.
“Ahaha! You did not anticipate that now, did you? You expected me to quake in my skin and run like a gutless coward! Foolish, I don’t even have said body parts! I theoretically spit in your fa-“
>Your adrenaline-fuelled taunt is cut short at the spider returns the strike, hitting you square in the face with a left hook.
“Ooof! You call that a punch! My mother could punch better than that! Come on!”
>The spider pauses, regarding you with dozens of beady eyes, before taking a step back.
>You barely have time to react before the spider smacks your with four of its bunched fists, sending the top half of your body flying across the floor.
“Ouch! That was my best spine, you… BOUNDER!”
>The enormous arachnid leaps on your torso, pinning you down while the others continue to try and free the crusaders.
“Gah! Get off me!” you cry, squirming to escape the clutches of the disgusting creature.
>Your struggle only serves to excite the spider, as it wrestles you into the ground, undoubtedly preparing a silken straightjacket for you…
>Suddenly, you get an idea. You controlled your body remotely before, could you do it now when it mattered the most?
>Your thoughts turn to your legs, lying uselessly on the floor beside you. If you could just…
>The legs shakily stand up, as you let out a cry of triumph. The spiders now regarding you with hesitation looks around to see the cause of your exuberance. Too late!
>Willing your legs to move, they rise from the floor, charging towards the spider, before leaping upwards with the grace of a drunken elephant. With a satisfying whack, they connect with the spiders face in a magnificent two-footed dropkick.
“Take that! Did you feel it? THAT IS A GENTLEMAN’S KICK, YOU RUFFIAN!”
>”You call that a kick, pardner? Y’ain’t seen nothin’ yet!”
>Spurred on by your strike, Applejack charges at the monster, which retaliates by firing a solid ball of web from its rear.
>Applejack deftly dodges the webby trap, sliding towards the spider. The web-ball continues to arc though, hitting the poor-headed pegasus square in the back.
>”ACK, GROSS! IT’S IN MY WINGS!”
>Her cries are left ignored, as your attention is fixated solely on Applejack and the spider.
>As she closes the distance, she swivels on her hooves, her ponytail whipping round…
>BAM!
>You jaw hangs open in surprise as the spider careers backwards across the floor, letting out a shrill cry of pain.
>It skids along the floor, struggles to get to its feet… before collapsing, mewling gently.
>Rarity snorts in contempt. “Phenomenal kick, Applejack dear! Fortunate indeed that Fluttershy was not here to witness it!”
>”Thanks darlin’. Ah pride myself on mah ability to kick things hard.”
>Applejack and Rarity return to freeing their sisters, as Rainbow Dash now juggles freeing her own wings and her Scootaloo.
>A guttural tearing sound filling the air as the webbed binding is ripped free, finally freeing the fillies.
>”Applejack!”
>”Applebloom! When ah said y’were grounded, ah meant it! Look at the trouble y’got yourself into!”
>”Sorry Applejack…” she mutters, looking up at her sister with wide, round eyes.
>Applejack sighs, before bringing her sister in for a hug.
>”Ah’m still relieved to see you’re ok. But haystacks, don’t give me scares like that no more!”
>The two sisters hug fiercely, as Applejack chuckles.
>”But just because ah’m glad you’re sound and well don’t mean y’aint grounded no more!”
>”I agree!” Rarity exclaims, grooming the spider webbing out of Sweetie Belle’s hair. “Out of all the things you could have done, you decided to ignore your sister’s warning and engage in such… uncouth exploits!”
>Sweetie Belle hangs her head in shame, before perking up as Rarity nuzzles her.
>”But thank the heavens that you’re ok.” She concludes, a beaming smile crossing her face.
>”No, thank Anonymous there!”
>You swivel your head to Rainbow Dash, as Scootaloo struggles with the prismatic pony’s webby wings.
>”If it weren’t for him finding us, and bringing us back here to help, who knows what might have happened?”
>”It was Anonymous’ fault in the first place!”
>Your long-gone heart sinks as you realise your fib, so well intending at the time, may be about to bite you in the ass.
“It’s true… This was my fault. The crusaders found me In Twilights attic, with the intention of treasure hunting. When they discovered my head, stashed away in Twilight’s attic, the quest quickly turned to one of recovering my body.”
>Rarity’s stern hardens.
>”Why are you saying this?”
“Because… because I had lied to them. There is no treasure down here, never was. All that was down here was that cowering spider, and my dusty old body.”
>Rarity’s glare morphs into one of pure fury. “You lied to them? Just to get them to help you find your body back? How could you!”
“I… Actually, I’ve got nothing to say in my defence. I acted purely on a selfish fear that they wouldn’t help me otherwise: I am responsible for endangering their lives…”
>”Damn right you are!” Rarity exclaims.
>”Yeah, we oughta pick y’apart an’ leave y’here!” Applejack agrees, as her and Rarity advance on your helpless self.
>”Rarity, wait!”
>Rarity pauses at her sister’s request, turning around.
>”What is it, Sweetie Belle?” she asks with an impatient tone.
>”Just wait a minute, before you start knocking Anon about!” she exclaims, trotting over to your torso.
>”Sure, Anon here might have told us a fib. But you can’t ignore that fact he came back for us! He could have just run away if his intentions were greedy!”
>Applebloom joins your side, as you blink in surprise.
>”Ah agree! Besides, it’s… well, it’s more our fault than his! We shouldn’t have been adventurin’ out when we were grounded!”
>Suddenly, Scootaloo is perched on your head, hooves wrapped around your skull.
>”Yeah, sure, there might not have been any treasure!” she squeals. “But to be honest, I was never in for the treasure, really!”
>”Whaddya means, Scootaloo!”
>”Well Applebloom, I gotta be honest… I never thought we’d get our cutie marks from this thing.”
>”You didn’t?” Sweetie Belle asks in surprise.
>”Nah, not really. And before you ask why… well, I was only really in this for the adventure, you know? It was something exciting, new, different…”
>”You know Scootaloo… I think you’re right!” Sweetie Belle agrees with a wide smile on her face. “The whole treasure thing doesn’t really seem that important anymore, does it?”
>Applebloom giggles. “Ah think ah feel the same way! Ah don’t even care that we didn’t get our cutie marks…”
>She grins at you, before turning to her sister.
>”Because ah’ve got somethin’ much more important oughtta this…”
>She trots over to Applejack, before wrapping her sister in a tender hug.
>”Ah now know y’weren’t tryin’ to punish me, Applejack. Y’were just worried about me, that’s all. Ah shouldn’t have gone and done this t’ya…”
>Applejack blinks in surprise, before her stern glare mellows away.
>”Aw shucks, Applebloom…”
>Applejack kneels down, returning the embrace with heart-warming fervour.
>Rarity opens her mouth to say something, before sighing.
>”I simply can’t stay mad right now… come here, Sweetie Belle!”
>Sweetie Belle bounds over, giggling as her sister nuzzles her.
>Scootaloo is not left out of the feel-good moment: as she comes to a stop next to Rainbow Dash, the cyan Pegasus wraps the filly up in a feathery hug, laughing heartily.
>You sigh in contentedness, before propping yourself upright and dragging yourself over to your body.
“Hnngh! Bah… I’m not even sure where this goes… if I just… aha!”
>Your spine slots into place, your feet arching as control is fully returned to them.
>You haul yourself up, brushing yourself down as you do.
“Well then, all well that ends well, am I right?”
>”Don’t think yourself off the hook just yet, Anonymous…” Rarity chuckles, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “But I suppose I should thank you. Even if you did cause this mess, you still got my sister and her friends out of it in one piece.”
“You’re welcome… and er, thank you.”
>If you still had cheeks, they’d be blushing volcanically right now.
>You hear more scuffling from behind you, and you turn to face the still-mewling spider.
“And what do we do with this thing now?”
>”Nothin’, I’d hope. Ah just want t’get out of here, no need for further fightin’.”
>”Yeah dude, let’s just go. My head is freakin killing me!” Rainbow Dash complains.
>”What’s wrong with your head, Rainbow Dash? Are you sick?”
>”Heh, you’ll find out when you’re older kiddo.” She chuckles, as Scootaloo climbs onto her back, nestling between her wings.
“Well then, I shall not persist in remaining in this accursed cave… I just need to do one more thing…”
>You turn to the spider and bow.
“That was a fine fight in the end. If you ever feel like another round of pugilism, I shall be ready.”
>The spider responds by curling up, its many legs wrapped around its undoubtedly sore head.
>That Applejack had quite the kick, that’s for sure…
>In what seemed like minutes, you and the ponies had escaped the cave, and you lean blearily against the misshapen tree.
“Well, this whole thing has been quite the rush, hasn’t it?”
>”Ah wouldn’t call it a rush, sugarcube.” She says, before grinning. “But if ah’m honest, which ah always am, then ah’ll admit it was pretty darn satisfying, kickin’ that spider in the head.”
>You still hadn’t gotten over Applejack’s ludicrous accent. Maybe in time you’d actually be able to understand half the stuff she says…
“So, what is to be done now?” you ask.
>”What do you mean, Anonymous?”
“Well Rarity, what happens from here? What will you all be doing?”
>”Well, I for one will be retiring to my bedroom for a well-deserved beauty nap!” Rarity grins. “And I would think that Rainbow Dash here would follow suit… if “beauty nap” can even apply to her!”
>”I’d totally kick your flank if I didn’t feel like Iron Will and Snowflake tag-teamed me for 3 hours straight…” she mutters.
>”What’s ‘tag teaming’?” Scootaloo asks innocently, and Rainbow Dash blinks in surprise.
>”It’s, uh… it’s one of those grown-up things I told you about.”
>”Aw, do I really have to wait until I’m a grown up!” She asks, oblivious to the awkwardness of the situation.
>”YES!” Rainbow Dash splutters, her cheeks a brilliant hue of red.
>”Geez, fine then… When I am a grown-up, will you be doing a tag-team with me?”
>You quickly jam your arm into your gaping mouth, before letting out some strange combination of a choke and a laugh.
>”SCOOTALOO!”
>The filly recoils in surprise, as Rainbow Dash flushes.
>”What’s wrong Rainbow Dash? Are you embarrassed?” she asks concernedly.
>Rainbow Dash shuts her eyes tightly, breathing in heavily, before speaking.
>”Scootaloo, I’m not feeling very well and your questions don’t help. Now, I’ll take you to Sugarcube Corner as a treat, but only if you stop asking about… tag-teaming…”
>”Fine, I’ll be quiet!” Scootaloo exclaims enthusiastically, miming a zipping action over her mouth.
>As the filly clambers onto the multicoloured mare, Rainbow Dash offers you a pleading eye.
>”Kill me.” She mouths, and you choke on another laugh.
>Rainbow Dash begins walking off along the trail, and Applejack moves to follow her.
>”Ah gotta get back t’work now, an’ you’re gonna help me, Applebloom!”
>”What? But ah thought ah was grounded in mah room!”
>”Yah are, but y’gonna help me anyways!”
>”But Applejack!”
>”No buts, no whinin’!”
>Applebloom sighs, before sullenly following Applejack out of the clearing, leaving you along with Rarity and her sister.
>”Well, you already know of my intentions.”
>You nod silently, and she frowns.
>”Is there something wrong?”
“Well… what am I going to do? I can hardly just return to Twilight’s, clamber into the box and turn out the cranial lights, if you follow.”
>”No-one says you have to do that, you know. Although you’re… you being…”
“The whole ‘animated skeleton’ thing wouldn’t go down too well, would it?”
>”I was trying to think of a nicer way to put it, but yes.”
>You sigh.
“So, I am to remain in here then? Stuck in this forest?”
>”No, of course not! This is no place for a well-speaking… and admittedly, well meaning being such as yourself!” Rarity exclaims, before pausing.
>”For the time being, perhaps you could find somep0ny to stay with in Ponyville?”
”Rainbow Dash seemed pretty easygoing-“
>”Unless you feel like plummeting to your un-death from several thousand feet darling, I wouldn’t advise visiting Rainbow Dash’s house.”
“I beg your pardon?”
>”Pegasus houses have a horrible tendency to be… not on the ground.”
“Oh… hmm, really should have seen that coming… Oh well, no big deal. What about Applejack?”
>Rarity snorts.
>”Applejack? Unless you feel like being worked down to the bone… well, perhaps it’s too late for that, but I’m sure you follow.”
“Hmm, you aren’t painting an optimistic picture.”
>”Don’t mistake me, I abhor laziness. Sweet Apple Acres will require you to work your keep and then some, though.”
>You sigh.
“Well then, there’s not many options left…”
>”I suppose you’ll want to accommodate yourself in my abode, yes?”
“I don’t require food, I can fold up into a box when not needed and I’m very hygiene-conscious.”
>”I was going to offer you it anyway, but I suppose this only sweetens the agreement.”
>This strikes you by surprise.
“You were going to offer me a hearth to stay in? Why?”
>”I’m not the bearer of generosity for no reason, darling. I simply could not stand by and let somep0ny settle in the forest!”
“Well then, that’s… that’s extremely kind of you. Thank you!”
>”Of course, my generosity only extends so far… just don’t bring Sweetie Belle off on another gallivant, please!”
“I promise not to.”
>Rarity smiles pleasantly, a sight that warms your long-gone heart, before motioning to the path.
>”We should head back to Ponyville now; I for one have had enough of this wretched forest.”
“I couldn’t agree more! Let us make haste!”
>Rarity nods, before her eyes widen.
>”Wait a moment! Something doesn’t seem quite right…”
>You glance round while looking for what might be lost, before the realisation hits you.
“SWEETIE BELLE!” you both say in unified horror.
>”What?”
>Her head pokes over the rim of the cave entrance, before she hauls herself up, dragging a bag with her mouth.
>”Sweetie Belle! Good gracious, don’t give me a scare like that again! Why in Equestria were you hiding down that ghastly hole?”
>”I wasn’t hiding, I just forgot my bag!” she exclaims happily, dropping the bag on the forest floor.
>Rarity gapes at her, before she exhales in relief.
>”Let’s just go already…”
>You offer Sweetie Belle a grin while Rarity turns her back to you, before setting off down the path with her.
>You weren’t looking forward to your now inevitable encounter with Twilight… and the town was unlikely to welcome you…
>But that didn’t matter now. You had something now, something you couldn’t remember having in so many years…
>Hope.

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>The silence of the night surrounds you, interrupted only by your desperate sprint.
>Where the hell is the path? How did you miss it?
“Can’t stop to chide myself… must get help…” you pant, joints aching from the effort of running. 
>Suddenly, your foot catches on a treacherous root, wrenching it out of its socket whole.
“Gah! Son of a…” 
>You grasp your femur, wincing in pain, before tugging it out of its ensnarement, and twisting it back into its joint.
>Every delay, every holdup, every second you spent dawdling around… just another second for that spider to find the crusaders.
>”Unless it found them already…” Your psyche taunts.
>You grit your teeth and begin running, but guilt isn’t something you can easily outrun… >Grim images of the fillies’ fate dance at the edge of your conscious, only serving to speed up your determined sprinting.
>Soon enough, the tree-line begins to thin out, the dense rows of foliage spacing out.
“Almost at the edge… just one… more… minute…”
>With a triumphant cry, you break through the tree-line, coming to a bedraggled standstill.
>You sway on your feet, gasping at their pain, oblivious to the world around you.
>When you finally begin to think clearly, a number of nearby voices grabs your attention.
>”C’mon Rainbow Dash, get back on yer hooves already!”
>”My head… oh god my head… buck!”
>Suddenly cautious, you creep along the bushy path, senses on full alert.
>”Goodness gracious, it’s awfully ragged out here. Are you sure they came out here?”
>”Ah told ya, Rarity. We checked every other place in town an’ they ain’t nowhere to be found.”
>”I dare hope that Sweetie Belle had enough sense to avoid the Everfree, of all places! It is not the place for a mare such as her… or a mare like me, for that matter!”
>”Quit yer whinin’, it ain’t the first time y’been out here!”
>Now more curious then cautious, you skulk through the undergrowth, separating the folds off the bush in front of you…
>Three ponies stood there, each distinct in their own way. One was an orange earth pony, hair tied up and adorned with a battered Stetson hat: another was a white-as-snow unicorn with a flowing, flamboyant mane that commanded your attention. The third was a cyan-blue pegasus with a particularly prismatic mane: she (at least you assumed it was a she) was curling up on the ground, clutching her head in obvious discomfort.
>”Why did I have to come…?” she moans, face buried in the ground.
>”Cause yer Scootaloo’s idol an’ all, that makes you responsible for her!” the earth pony mutters, glancing at the Everfree.
>Scootaloo… Sweetie Belle… they know the fillies, but what is the connection?
>Your jaw suddenly drops.
“Sisters…”
>”What was that?” the unicorn asks, jumping in fright.
>Oh dear, that was not meant to happen…
>”Ah don’t know, but it sounded like it came from that bush!”
>You panic, backing off from the bush as the ponies near it
>You are so screwed, once they find out you left their sisters in that calamitous cave…
>They’re about to find you… might as well try and give them a good first impression.
>You peek round the bush… only to stare right into a pair of magenta eyes, inches away from yours.
>”What the… damn, I really did drink too much.”
“I, uh… hello?”
>The eyes blink once, before the pegasus recoils in horror.
>”What the buck! That’s not a hallucination!”
>You stand up straight as the ponies surround you, their eyes filled with suspicion.
>”What in tar-nation!”
“Now, let’s all be calm, sensible adults now-“
>Your plea is met by a two-hoofed kick from the earth pony, and you fly back in pieces.
“I suppose that was to be expected, but god DAMMIT that hurt!”
>”Applejack! How rude can you be, kicking a person not two seconds after you meet them?”
>”Person? Rarity darlin’, I don’t know if you noticed, but he’s a talkin’ skeleton! There’s a world o’ things wrong with that!”
>”He didn’t threaten us, nor raise his hoof to attack! A little courtesy goes a long way, Applejack!”
>Your skull is suddenly lifted off the ground, surrounded by a magical aura, and you look the ponies squarely in the eye.
“Thank you… Rarity…”
>”Not a bother, my dear. Not all of us are as brash as Applejack here. Now, who might you be?”
“My name is… Anonymous.”
>”Anonymous? Seems rather tacky for a title, but if that’s your name…”
“It didn’t use to be that, but that’s a rather long story… in the meantime, could you give me a helping hand and put me back together?”
>”Of course darling, just tell me what goes where and you’ll be back on your feet in no time!”
>Over the course of the following minutes, Rarity painstakingly pieces you back together, as Applejack tries to make small talk.
>”So, uh… sorry bout that whole ‘kicking you into pieces’ business. Ah ain’t usually one to panic-“
“Don’t worry about it, some just find me to be too spooky. And who can blame them, in all honesty? Just don’t make dismantling me a common occurrence, and we’ll be as jolly as can be!”
>As Rarity fiddles about with your lower torso, tongue bitten in concentration, you turn your head to the pegasus of this particular trio.
“And may I have the pleasure of knowing your name?
>”Rainbow Dash.” She mutters sullenly.
“Oh. Well, it’s certainly fitting… is something wrong? Have I offended you so?”
>”No. Too much cider.”
“Ah, been tipping back the bottle too much! I understand!” 
>”So loud… uh…”
>She buries her head between her wings, in a strange self-cuddle.
“Well, uh… best of luck recovering, I suppose!”
>Rarity suddenly yells in triumph, as your foot spasms.
>”And there we go! An expert reconstruction, if I do say so myself!”
>You tentatively wiggle your toes and fingers, before energetically raising your arms and legs.
“Perfect, absolutely perfect! I feel even better than I did before-hand, how did you do such an expert job?”
>”Yeah Rarity, where in Equestria didya learn how t’reconstruc… reconstr… rebuild a skeleton?”
>”Darlings, please. If I can assemble the Grand Galloping Gala dress of Celestia herself the night before the event, with nothing more than a pair of broken scissors, a rusty frying pan, 200 rolls of silk and a bottle of Applejack Daniels… repairing a charming skeleton on an early morning on the outskirts of the Everfree is a breeze!”
>You stand up straight, stretching out s your joints pop.
“Ah, that feels heavenly.”
>”You’re welcome!” Rarity giggles, her mane bouncing. “I may be generous through and through, but I’ll need you to return the favour right now. We’re in a bit of a… situation, so to say.”
>You sigh.
“I’m afraid I know much more about this than I ought to… the cutie mark crusaders, yes?”
>Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash pause as you reveal your knowledge of the moment.
>”You know about Sweetie Belle and the others?”
“Well… yes. I do.”
>”You know where they are right now?”
“I… oh jeez, this isn’t good.”
>Rarity’s smile and demure hardens into a stoic stare.
>“What do you mean ‘this isn’t good’?”
“Well, I…” You gulp. “They may currently be down in a cave deep within the forest, being stalked by a gargantuan arachnid-“
>”May be? They MAY BE trapped in a cave?” Rarity yells.
“Ok, they’re definitely in the cave!”
>”And you just abandoned them there? You didn’t even try to rescue them!” 
“What could I do? If one kick from a waist-height pony shatters me whole, do you think I can stand up to a spider that fills the whole tunnel-“
>”Both of you, cut it out!” screams a voice, and the pair of you cease your bickering.
>Rainbow Dash, looking as tattered as a boxer following a pugilism bout with his rival, steps between the two of you.
>”Scootaloo, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle are trapped right now! We can beat Anon’s flank till it turns red, but that can come after we rescue them!”
>Rarity glares at you, before huffing. 
>”The Everfree, it’s always the bloody Everfree…”
>Applejack starts marching towards the tree-line.
>”Anonymous, you’re gonna lead us to this cave, and ah hope for your sake that they’re still ok.”
“I wasn’t cutting my losses and running you know… I came out to get help!”
>”Then we’ll just have t’see if your gamble was worth it… now get runnin’!”
>Ignoring the well deserved glares from the ponies, you start running for the cave, the ponies hot on your heels.
>”Anonymous! Why were the crusaders with you anyway?” Rarity yells.
“I… I was going to help them find treasure…”
>”And why of all places in Equestria did they gallivant down a cave?” 
“No idea…”
>Rarity stares at you, before huffing.
>”Very well then… pick up the pace already!”
>You gulp and will yourself to sprint faster, suddenly terrified of the classy mare behind you.
>You shortly arrive at the cave, the ponies exhausted but determined.
>”So this here’s th’cave?”
“Correct, Applejack.”
>She silently stares down into it, before turning back to you.
>”Y’can go first.”
>Your jaw hinges open as you prepare to argue, before you sigh.
“Very well.” You say, before vaulting down.
>Your bony feet land with an echoing thud, and you feel yourself clench with fear.
>”Come on y’all, let’s follow him already!”
>A second later, the trio of siblings begin to make their way down the steep entrance.
>Rainbow Dash fumbles, blinking with almost comedic surprise, before tumbling down to the ground. 
>You scramble forward to catch her, the lightness of the Pegasus catching you off guard.
“Gotcha!” 
>”Ooof!” She wheezes, rubbing her sore sides. 
“You can thank me for that premature injury averted! Though if I may be so rude, I’m surprised to see such an acrobatic animal as yourself floundering like a fish out of water.”
>”Buddy, my head feels like I just went five rounds with Iron Will and lost. Don’t yap at me unless you feel like giving Rarity another assembling job to do.”
“Your less-than-subtle threat has been duly noted” 
>You gently set Rainbow Dash down onto the floor, and she shivers.
>”By Celestia your hands feel weird. So thin and… bony…”
>”How insightful, Rainbow Dash. If you’re done with your intrinsic commentary into the situation, could we please hurry up and find the crusaders?”
>Rainbow Dash shrugs off Rarity’s rant, as she turns to you.
>”Well Anonymous, how do we find the crusaders now? Did you know what path they took?”
“I, uh… I’m, not sure how far into the cave they went. I kind of, er, fell into that hole there.”
>”Wonderful, truly exemplary.” Rarity mutters sarcastically. “This fills us with so much confidence…”
>A slight flickering grabs your attention, and you see a firefly struggling to free itself from a nearby web.
>A grim idea suddenly hits you.
“I know how we can follow the crusader’s trail!”
>”How?” Applejack asks incredulously. 
“By following the firefly trail.” You reply, with almost sick satisfaction. 
>”Hmm… ah suppose that could work.”
“I’ve no better idea for finding them, do you?”
>”No, ah don’t.”
“Well then, let us carry on!” you say, marching towards the side tunnel which the crusaders must have taken.
>”You best let me take the lead, Anonymous.” Rarity says as she marches forwards with a glowing horn. 
“Er, very well then. Let us make haste!”
>The three of you begin to explore the tunnel, fireflies periodically marking your route. 
>”Uugh! I got cobweb in my wings!” 
>”Gosh darnit Rainbow Dash, wouldya be quiet fer one moment? You’re gonna let that spider find us!”
>”I must agree, these tunnels are a nightmare for my hair!”
>You sigh to yourself, cupping your empty eye sockets with your hand. 
“All of you be quiet!” you hiss, and the three ponies turn on you in unison.
>”Don’t you shush me! You’re the one who got them and us into this tomfoolery!” Rarity snaps, her horn’s glow wavering. 
“And I’m doing my damnedest to get them back out of this ruckus, despite your verbal undermining!”
>”Oh, why… you did NOT just-“
>A sudden, faint cry cuts the both of you off, as you freeze in place.
“W-what was that?”
>”That… sounded like Sweetie Belle!” Rarity cries, eyes widening. 
“Oh, blast it! Come on, we have to move NOW!”
>You break into a sprint, your bones’ creaking being drowned out by the hurried hoofbeat behind you.
>Careering down the stony path, you sprint towards the source of the scream. You suddenly grind to a halt as the path splits into a six-way junction, each route as likely as the other.
>”Why’d you stop!” Rainbow Dash pants, coming to a shaky stop.
“This… BUGGER of a path… I don’t know where to go!”
>You kneel down and cup your head in frustration, before punching the ground.
“Dammit! Dammit, dammit, dammit-“
>”Uh, Anonymous!”
>You glance upwards, your teeth gritted in anger.
“What? There’s nothing that can be done!”
>Applejack silently points to the firefly that had deftly landed on your hand, and you gape at it.
“It… which tunnel did it come from!”
>”Far left!” Rarity shouts, and you scramble to your feet. 
“Well, uh… I apologise for that little outburst, but… let’s just go!”
>You resume your hurried chase, rocketing down the far left path, feeling rather stupid at your own dramatics. 
>Another shrill cry spurs you on, this time coming from much closer.
>A few minutes, you and the ponies burst into an open section of the cave. Along the back wall, the clearing opened up into what appeared to be a huge tunnel plummeting downwards, and strung along the adjacent wall…
>”Rarity!” Sweetie Belle screams, struggling to free herself from the silky spindles that were securing her to the wall. 
>Rarity gasps. ”Sweetie Belle! Applebloom! Scootaloo! Oh thank goodness that you’re all safe!”
>Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash rush over to the wall, tugging on the bonds binding the crusaders.
>”Come on!” Applejack grunts, wrestling with the fibrous webbing. “Darn… stupid… spiders!” 
>You approach the crusaders cautiously, your senses on full alert.
“I am relieved to see you all well, but we heard screaming not a few minutes ago. What happened?”
>”The spider just left us here and crawled away!” Scootaloo exclaims as Rainbow Dash struggles to free her. 
“It just left you here? That is bad… I can’t help but feel that this may be a-“
>From behind you, a sickening and sticky sound emanates, like something crawling down a web-covered wall…
“Trap.” You finish, your long-gone muscles tensing in fear and anticipation. 
>The fillies’ eyes widen in fear, their sisters turn round, and you gulp.
 
“It’s right behind me, isn’t it?” 
>The six ponies all nod in terrified unison, and you sigh.
“Then I best do something brave!” you cry, cupping your fist as you wheel round.
>You barely have time to examine the spider before your fist strikes it in the face, causing to stagger back in surprise.
“Ahaha! You did not anticipate that now, did you? You expected me to quake in my skin and run like a gutless coward! Foolish, I don’t even have said body parts! I theoretically spit in your fa-“
>Your adrenaline-fuelled taunt is cut short at the spider returns the strike, hitting you square in the face with a left hook.
“Ooof! You call that a punch! My mother could punch better than that! Come on!”
>The spider pauses, regarding you with dozens of beady eyes, before taking a step back. 
>You barely have time to react before the spider smacks your with four of its bunched fists, sending the top half of your body flying across the floor.
“Ouch! That was my best spine, you… BOUNDER!”
>The enormous arachnid leaps on your torso, pinning you down while the others continue to try and free the crusaders.
“Gah! Get off me!” you cry, squirming to escape the clutches of the disgusting creature.
>Your struggle only serves to excite the spider, as it wrestles you into the ground, undoubtedly preparing a silken straightjacket for you…
>Suddenly, you get an idea. You controlled your body remotely before, could you do it now when it mattered the most?
>Your thoughts turn to your legs, lying uselessly on the floor beside you. If you could just…
>The legs shakily stand up, as you let out a cry of triumph. The spiders now regarding you with hesitation looks around to see the cause of your exuberance. Too late!
>Willing your legs to move, they rise from the floor, charging towards the spider, before leaping upwards with the grace of a drunken elephant. With a satisfying whack, they connect with the spiders face in a magnificent two-footed dropkick.
“Take that! Did you feel it? THAT IS A GENTLEMAN’S KICK, YOU RUFFIAN!”
>”You call that a kick, pardner? Y’ain’t seen nothin’ yet!”
>Spurred on by your strike, Applejack charges at the monster, which retaliates by firing a solid ball of web from its rear.
>Applejack deftly dodges the webby trap, sliding towards the spider. The web-ball continues to arc though, hitting the poor-headed pegasus square in the back.
>”ACK, GROSS! IT’S IN MY WINGS!”
>Her cries are left ignored, as your attention is fixated solely on Applejack and the spider. 
>As she closes the distance, she swivels on her hooves, her ponytail whipping round…
>BAM!
>You jaw hangs open in surprise as the spider careers backwards across the floor, letting out a shrill cry of pain. 
>It skids along the floor, struggles to get to its feet… before collapsing, mewling gently. 
>Rarity snorts in contempt. “Phenomenal kick, Applejack dear! Fortunate indeed that Fluttershy was not here to witness it!”
>”Thanks darlin’. Ah pride myself on mah ability to kick things hard.”
>Applejack and Rarity return to freeing their sisters, as Rainbow Dash now juggles freeing her own wings and her Scootaloo.
>A guttural tearing sound filling the air as the webbed binding is ripped free, finally freeing the fillies.
>”Applejack!”
>”Applebloom! When ah said y’were grounded, ah meant it! Look at the trouble y’got yourself into!”
>”Sorry Applejack…” she mutters, looking up at her sister with wide, round eyes.
>Applejack sighs, before bringing her sister in for a hug.
>”Ah’m still relieved to see you’re ok. But haystacks, don’t give me scares like that no more!”
>The two sisters hug fiercely, as Applejack chuckles.
>”But just because ah’m glad you’re sound and well don’t mean y’aint grounded no more!”
>”I agree!” Rarity exclaims, grooming the spider webbing out of Sweetie Belle’s hair. “Out of all the things you could have done, you decided to ignore your sister’s warning and engage in such… uncouth exploits!” 
>Sweetie Belle hangs her head in shame, before perking up as Rarity nuzzles her.
>”But thank the heavens that you’re ok.” She concludes, a beaming smile crossing her face.
>”No, thank Anonymous there!” 
>You swivel your head to Rainbow Dash, as Scootaloo struggles with the prismatic pony’s webby wings.
>”If it weren’t for him finding us, and bringing us back here to help, who knows what might have happened?”
>”It was Anonymous’ fault in the first place!”
>Your long-gone heart sinks as you realise your fib, so well intending at the time, may be about to bite you in the ass.
“It’s true… This was my fault. The crusaders found me In Twilights attic, with the intention of treasure hunting. When they discovered my head, stashed away in Twilight’s attic, the quest quickly turned to one of recovering my body.”
>Rarity’s stern hardens.
>”Why are you saying this?”
“Because… because I had lied to them. There is no treasure down here, never was. All that was down here was that cowering spider, and my dusty old body.”
>Rarity’s glare morphs into one of pure fury. “You lied to them? Just to get them to help you find your body back? How could you!” 	
“I… Actually, I’ve got nothing to say in my defence. I acted purely on a selfish fear that they wouldn’t help me otherwise: I am responsible for endangering their lives…”
>”Damn right you are!” Rarity exclaims. 
>”Yeah, we oughta pick y’apart an’ leave y’here!” Applejack agrees, as her and Rarity advance on your helpless self.
>”Rarity, wait!”
>Rarity pauses at her sister’s request, turning around.
>”What is it, Sweetie Belle?” she asks with an impatient tone.
>”Just wait a minute, before you start knocking Anon about!” she exclaims, trotting over to your torso.
>”Sure, Anon here might have told us a fib. But you can’t ignore that fact he came back for us! He could have just run away if his intentions were greedy!”
>Applebloom joins your side, as you blink in surprise.
>”Ah agree! Besides, it’s… well, it’s more our fault than his! We shouldn’t have been adventurin’ out when we were grounded!”
>Suddenly, Scootaloo is perched on your head, hooves wrapped around your skull.
>”Yeah, sure, there might not have been any treasure!” she squeals. “But to be honest, I was never in for the treasure, really!”
>”Whaddya means, Scootaloo!”
>”Well Applebloom, I gotta be honest… I never thought we’d get our cutie marks from this thing.”
>”You didn’t?” Sweetie Belle asks in surprise.
>”Nah, not really. And before you ask why… well, I was only really in this for the adventure, you know? It was something exciting, new, different…”
>”You know Scootaloo… I think you’re right!” Sweetie Belle agrees with a wide smile on her face. “The whole treasure thing doesn’t really seem that important anymore, does it?”
>Applebloom giggles. “Ah think ah feel the same way! Ah don’t even care that we didn’t get our cutie marks…”
>She grins at you, before turning to her sister.
>”Because ah’ve got somethin’ much more important oughtta this…”
>She trots over to Applejack, before wrapping her sister in a tender hug. 
>”Ah now know y’weren’t tryin’ to punish me, Applejack. Y’were just worried about me, that’s all. Ah shouldn’t have gone and done this t’ya…”
>Applejack blinks in surprise, before her stern glare mellows away. 
>”Aw shucks, Applebloom…”
>Applejack kneels down, returning the embrace with heart-warming fervour. 
>Rarity opens her mouth to say something, before sighing.
>”I simply can’t stay mad right now… come here, Sweetie Belle!”
>Sweetie Belle bounds over, giggling as her sister nuzzles her.
>Scootaloo is not left out of the feel-good moment: as she comes to a stop next to Rainbow Dash, the cyan Pegasus wraps the filly up in a feathery hug, laughing heartily.
>You sigh in contentedness, before propping yourself upright and dragging yourself over to your body.
“Hnngh! Bah… I’m not even sure where this goes… if I just… aha!”
>Your spine slots into place, your feet arching as control is fully returned to them.
>You haul yourself up, brushing yourself down as you do.
“Well then, all well that ends well, am I right?”
>”Don’t think yourself off the hook just yet, Anonymous…” Rarity chuckles, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “But I suppose I should thank you. Even if you did cause this mess, you still got my sister and her friends out of it in one piece.”
“You’re welcome… and er, thank you.”
>If you still had cheeks, they’d be blushing volcanically right now.
>You hear more scuffling from behind you, and you turn to face the still-mewling spider.
“And what do we do with this thing now?”
>”Nothin’, I’d hope. Ah just want t’get out of here, no need for further fightin’.”
>”Yeah dude, let’s just go. My head is freakin killing me!” Rainbow Dash complains. 
>”What’s wrong with your head, Rainbow Dash? Are you sick?”
>”Heh, you’ll find out when you’re older kiddo.” She chuckles, as Scootaloo climbs onto her back, nestling between her wings. 
“Well then, I shall not persist in remaining in this accursed cave… I just need to do one more thing…”
>You turn to the spider and bow.
“That was a fine fight in the end. If you ever feel like another round of pugilism, I shall be ready.”
>The spider responds by curling up, its many legs wrapped around its undoubtedly sore head.
>That Applejack had quite the kick, that’s for sure…

>In what seemed like minutes, you and the ponies had escaped the cave, and you lean blearily against the misshapen tree.
“Well, this whole thing has been quite the rush, hasn’t it?”
>”Ah wouldn’t call it a rush, sugarcube.” She says, before grinning. “But if ah’m honest, which ah always am, then ah’ll admit it was pretty darn satisfying, kickin’ that spider in the head.”
>You still hadn’t gotten over Applejack’s ludicrous accent. Maybe in time you’d actually be able to understand half the stuff she says…
“So, what is to be done now?” you ask.
>”What do you mean, Anonymous?”
“Well Rarity, what happens from here? What will you all be doing?”
>”Well, I for one will be retiring to my bedroom for a well-deserved beauty nap!” Rarity grins. “And I would think that Rainbow Dash here would follow suit… if “beauty nap” can even apply to her!”
>”I’d totally kick your flank if I didn’t feel like Iron Will and Snowflake tag-teamed me for 3 hours straight…” she mutters.
>”What’s ‘tag teaming’?” Scootaloo asks innocently, and Rainbow Dash blinks in surprise.
>”It’s, uh… it’s one of those grown-up things I told you about.”
>”Aw, do I really have to wait until I’m a grown up!” She asks, oblivious to the awkwardness of the situation. 
>”YES!” Rainbow Dash splutters, her cheeks a brilliant hue of red.
>”Geez, fine then… When I am a grown-up, will you be doing a tag-team with me?”
>You quickly jam your arm into your gaping mouth, before letting out some strange combination of a choke and a laugh.
>”SCOOTALOO!”
>The filly recoils in surprise, as Rainbow Dash flushes.
>”What’s wrong Rainbow Dash? Are you embarrassed?” she asks concernedly. 
>Rainbow Dash shuts her eyes tightly, breathing in heavily, before speaking.
>”Scootaloo, I’m not feeling very well and your questions don’t help. Now, I’ll take you to Sugarcube Corner as a treat, but only if you stop asking about… tag-teaming…” 
>”Fine, I’ll be quiet!” Scootaloo exclaims enthusiastically, miming a zipping action over her mouth.
>As the filly clambers onto the multicoloured mare, Rainbow Dash offers you a pleading eye.
>”Kill me.” She mouths, and you choke on another laugh.
>Rainbow Dash begins walking off along the trail, and Applejack moves to follow her.
>”Ah gotta get back t’work now, an’ you’re gonna help me, Applebloom!”
>”What? But ah thought ah was grounded in mah room!”
>”Yah are, but y’gonna help me anyways!”
>”But Applejack!”
>”No buts, no whinin’!” 
>Applebloom sighs, before sullenly following Applejack out of the clearing, leaving you along with Rarity and her sister.
>”Well, you already know of my intentions.”
>You nod silently, and she frowns.
>”Is there something wrong?”
“Well… what am I going to do? I can hardly just return to Twilight’s, clamber into the box and turn out the cranial lights, if you follow.” 
>”No-one says you have to do that, you know. Although you’re… you being…”
“The whole ‘animated skeleton’ thing wouldn’t go down too well, would it?”
>”I was trying to think of a nicer way to put it, but yes.”
>You sigh.
“So, I am to remain in here then? Stuck in this forest?”
>”No, of course not! This is no place for a well-speaking… and admittedly, well meaning being such as yourself!” Rarity exclaims, before pausing.
>”For the time being, perhaps you could find somep0ny to stay with in Ponyville?”
”Rainbow Dash seemed pretty easygoing-“
>”Unless you feel like plummeting to your un-death from several thousand feet darling, I wouldn’t advise visiting Rainbow Dash’s house.”
“I beg your pardon?”
>”Pegasus houses have a horrible tendency to be… not on the ground.”
“Oh… hmm, really should have seen that coming… Oh well, no big deal. What about Applejack?”
>Rarity snorts.
>”Applejack? Unless you feel like being worked down to the bone… well, perhaps it’s too late for that, but I’m sure you follow.”
“Hmm, you aren’t painting an optimistic picture.”
>”Don’t mistake me, I abhor laziness. Sweet Apple Acres will require you to work your keep and then some, though.”
>You sigh.
“Well then, there’s not many options left…”
>”I suppose you’ll want to accommodate yourself in my abode, yes?”
“I don’t require food, I can fold up into a box when not needed and I’m very hygiene-conscious.”
>”I was going to offer you it anyway, but I suppose this only sweetens the agreement.”
>This strikes you by surprise.
“You were going to offer me a hearth to stay in? Why?”
>”I’m not the bearer of generosity for no reason, darling. I simply could not stand by and let somep0ny settle in the forest!”
“Well then, that’s… that’s extremely kind of you. Thank you!”
>”Of course, my generosity only extends so far… just don’t bring Sweetie Belle off on another gallivant, please!”
“I promise not to.”
>Rarity smiles pleasantly, a sight that warms your long-gone heart, before motioning to the path.
>”We should head back to Ponyville now; I for one have had enough of this wretched forest.”
“I couldn’t agree more! Let us make haste!”
>Rarity nods, before her eyes widen.
>”Wait a moment! Something doesn’t seem quite right…”
>You glance round while looking for what might be lost, before the realisation hits you.
“SWEETIE BELLE!” you both say in unified horror.
>”What?”
>Her head pokes over the rim of the cave entrance, before she hauls herself up, dragging a bag with her mouth.
>”Sweetie Belle! Good gracious, don’t give me a scare like that again! Why in Equestria were you hiding down that ghastly hole?”
>”I wasn’t hiding, I just forgot my bag!” she exclaims happily, dropping the bag on the forest floor.
>Rarity gapes at her, before she exhales in relief.
>”Let’s just go already…”
>You offer Sweetie Belle a grin while Rarity turns her back to you, before setting off down the path with her.
>You weren’t looking forward to your now inevitable encounter with Twilight… and the town was unlikely to welcome you…
>But that didn’t matter now. You had something now, something you couldn’t remember having in so many years…
>Hope.

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