>Be Anon
>Be in hoersworld with NEETpone roommate
>It's morning, and you're about to fire up the new coffeemaker you bought
>Floor won't be up for a few hours, and the coffee will either be burnt or cold by then
>She can't tell the difference, though
>She's used to burnt coffee from the convenience store, and doesn't mind if its cold
>You are not a fan of either
>You measure some grounds into the paper filter and tip the carafe of water into the machine
>"Anon. Oh yes, Anon," you hear Floor's muffled voice from her room
>Is she calling you?
>Doesn't sound like it
>You walk to her door
>"Just like that, Anon," you hear her voice quietly say, with an edge of anticipation
>You crack her door open just a little bit, just to make sure she isn't calling you
>She's splayed across her bed, eyes shut, asleep
>She's dreaming
>About you, evidently
>"Harder!," she says


>Fuck
>You quickly shut the door and go back to turn the coffee machine on
>It's going to take at least two cups to process this
>The little mare who, for the first week you lived here said, "Eep!" and ran into her room whenever you said something to her
>Who slowly became something of a friend, in the way roommates who get along do
>But still awkward and shy af
>She's now having a sex dream about you
>It really couldn't be anything else, could it
>"Fuck me Anon!," you hear from the other room
>It couldn't
>You'd given up on trying to get laid here for the same reason you gave up back home
>No girl seemed into you that way
>This one appears to be, at least in her dreams
>Maybe this is an opportunity to relinquish your status as a wizard?
>But how?
>How do you use this knowledge without seeming creepy or weird?
>Especially with such a shy pone?
>You pour yourself a cup from the carafe and sit at the table
>You have a hard on
>Guess that's one vote for trying to figure a way to pursue this


>Be Floor Bored
>You just woke up cumming
>Which is a jarring thing
>One minute you're having sex with Anon, and as soon as you start to cum you're alone in your bed
>Shit, this is happening more and more often
>You're dreaming about having sex with Anon
>And kinky sex at that
>Several times you've dreamed about peeing on him, and had to flip the mattress when you woke up
>You've dreamed about camwhoring for him
>Him fucking your ass
>Him fucking your throat
>Him pounding you until you couldn't stand it anymore, just now
>You smell coffee, which means he's up
>Celestia, it would be so embarrassing if he could read your mind
>When you're awake you're not even sure you feel that way about him
>Maybe a little, but that's just you being pathetic
>Feeling attracted to the only stallion - not even a stallion - who you've ever had anything resembling a normal talk with
>The only one who has ever been nice to you when it wasn't his job, like the jerk at the convenience store
>And you had a crush on him for a while, too
>Not like this, though
>Masturbatory fantasies, maybe, but no vivid sex dreams
>This is new
>How would he judge you if he knew?
>The thought terrifies you
>Pathetic little mare falls for her roommate because he was the only one nice to her


>He'd probably not be able to keep from laughing
>May as well go have some coffee with him, as images from your dream flood your mind
>Just act bitchy and he'll never suspect a thing
>You emerge from your room, and he greets you from the table where he's sitting
>"Good morning, Floor. Coffee?"
"Is it good this time?," you ask, surprised at just how bitchy that sounded.
"Last time it was really strong," you add, less bitchy
>No reason to overdo this
>You're trying to hide your attraction to him, not make him think you hate him
>Like in those comics you read
>He pours you a cup and you take a sip
"Not nearly as bad," you say.
Then quickly add, "Thanks, Anon."
>It's really hard to do bitchy without sounding rude or just plain mean
>This is WAY harder than you thought it would be
>"Floor," he begins, "wanna go out and do something today? Something fun?"
"What could be more fun than playing vidya and shitposting at home, Anon?," you hear yourself sounding a little too mean.
>"I was thinking maybe going out for a cider or two this afternoon," he says brightly
"Like my life would be better if I started drinking as well?"
>Shit, that was too mean


>You like cider just fine
>You don't indulge all that often because you've been told most of the stallions and even a few mares in your family liked it too much
>But an afternoon of daydrinking with Anon sounded great
>So great you had no choice but to shoot it down
>How dangerous a situation would that be?
>A few drinks with him and you let something about your attraction slip?
>Best case he'd laugh at how pathetic you are, and you'd laugh, too
>More likely he'd just be disgusted and horrified and move out
>Leaving you alone again
>You can't let that happen
>Even if it means keeping up this bitchy act
>The problem is the harder you work to keep him unattracted the more you're thinking about how attracted YOU are to him
>Fuck!
"Anon, I'd rather just stay home all day like usual. That doesn't sound like fun to me."
>Celestia, you sound like such a bitch!
>And you KNOW it would be fun
"But thanks for the offer," you say, finishing your coffee and making a b-line back to your room


>Be Anon
>Drinking coffee with Floor, who really woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning
>You've never seen her so... bitchy
>If she were a woman or a girl you'd just assume she was on her period
>Because that's how she was acting
>You can't really believe she's the only hoers in Ponyville who doesn't like cider
>From what you've seen that's just impossible
>Even the most straightlaced ponies you've met don't balk at the offer of cider
>They may just have one, but they NEVER have none
>Unlike the handful of AA folks you knew back home
>Ponies don't seem to need meetings about THAT
>So it's got to be YOU
>She woke up from a sex dream about you and was so disgusted
>So disgusted
>That she couldn't stand the sight of you
>Does that make sense?
>Kinda fits the profile of your life so far
>Shit, YOU are definitely going out for some cider this afternoon


>Be Floor Bored, back in the dark safety of your room
>You feel awful
>Anon just offered to take you out for cider
>Like he was your coltfriend 
>And you shot him down like a bitch
>Somepony finally asks you out on a date and you...
>A date?
>He never said it was a date
>This is how you're going to make an ass of yourself to him
>You know it
>Better just avoid him for the rest of the day
>Not going out of this room
>After the dreams you've been having you almost don't trust yourself around him
>Sure you can keep acting bitchy to keep from embarrassing yourself
>But that makes you sad
>You're treating him exactly the opposite of the way you'd like to, but don't dare
>You are gonna shitpost the hell outta some threads today


>Be Anon
>It's getting to be about mid afternoon, so you figure the Dewdrop is probably open
>You feel like you deserve at least a buzz today
>You're actually surprised at the mood Floor's being a bitch put you in
>You can't shake a sour frame of mind, and figure some drinks and maybe a little socializing might help
>As you're about to get up from your computer to head out a message comes in
>It Reads: "Not feeling well today. If you go out for food could you get me some and leave by my door? Tks!"
>She's sick?
>Maybe THAT explains the bitchiness and turning down the offer of cider
>Maybe it wasn't her being disgusted by you
>You don't entirely believe that, but you like the sound of it
>And if she is sick you probably should stick around in case she needs anything
>You message back back:
"Sorry to hear that. Will get food in a couple hours. Also will be around tonight if you need anything. Feel better!"
>Tomorrow is just as good a day to go out for cider
>You feel a little better now that you have an alternate explanation for her behavior
>She responds: "Tks Anon"


>Be Floor Bored
>As you figured you are now trapped in your room for the night
>Anon, being the sweet stallion that he is just told you he's there for you if you need anything
>That is what his message said
>No one has ever said that to you
>Of course they haven't, you're an adult with no purpose in life
>Who in their right mind would "be there" for you?
>Anon, obviously
>And you can't face him now as a result
>Don't make too much of this
>Maybe he's just feeling sorry for you because he thinks you're sick
>Well, you told him you were
>Which was a lie
>Now you're lying to him and being mean to him
>This isn't what you want
>Then again when do you ever get what you want?
>Is Anon what you want?
>Your subconscious seems to think so
>And going against it has resulted in your not leaving your room all day
>And not even for a good reason, like a new vidya
>You've pretty much spent the day shitposting and daydreaming about him
>Like a filly over her first crush


>You look at Mr Quivers on your desk
>Every orgasm you've had over the last week has been fantasizing about him or dreaming about him
>Or has it been two weeks?
>Three?
>Fuck
>You've spent your life avoiding things because you didn't want them
>You didn't give a fuck about the things most ponies care about
>But you obviously care about Anon
>Maybe now you do something to move toward what you want?
>But that's not who you are
>Yet you watch yourself like in a dream
>Open your door, walk across the living room and knock on Anon's door
>He opens it quickly
>"Are you OK, Floor," he asks looking at you all concerned
>Like someone else is piloting your body you look down, scrape a forehoof on the floor then hear yourself say:
"I'm feeling a lot better now. And I'm sorry I was so bitchy this morning. Is that cider offer still on?"
>It's like watching yourself make awful decisions in real time


>Be Anon
>Today just turned around
>Floor is standing in your doorway, asking if your offer for cider still stands
>And it's late enough in the day that it's got to be happy hour at the Dewdrop
>Which means your bits are worth twice as much
"Let's go now, Floor!"
>The little mare smiles at you
"We can make happy hour at the Dewdrop then grab a bite to eat after."
>It'll be like a date
>But you don't say that, for fear of spooking her
>It will be, though
>You smile back at her
>By pone standards she's plain, unkempt and probably a little psycho
>She lacks the moe thing other ponies have going on
>But you think she's beautiful
>And maybe with a little Dutch courage you could even tell her that
>Don't get ahead of yourself, tiger
>She's skittish as hell, and moody of late
>You've got to keep this evening light and fun
>But your dick knows she's had a sex dream about you
>And he's far more hopeful than the rest of you


>The walk to the Dewdrop was mostly in silence, but as you approach the place you feel the urge to get chatty
"When I first arrived here I worked for Rarity, doing odd jobs," you begin
"I think she hired me just to be nice, because there really wasn't that much to do around the boutique."
"But for a while I was making decent bits, and had nothing to do at night, so I hung out here."
"This is the place where I had my first casual conversations with ponies and got a little bit of a handle on your culture."
>She laughs and says, "Working at Rarity's shop and hanging around a dive bar - that's some introduction to Ponyville."
"It's not a dive bar, is it?"
>She responds, "Online everypony says it is. I've never actually been. You know, not so big on going out."
"Well we're out now," you say approaching the door of the establishment. Opening it you add, "Let's make the most of it."
>Inside is dimly lit and covered in dark wood
>There are only a few other ponies there, mostly at tables, leaving the bar open
>And behind the bar is a familiar hoers
>"Anon!, " the mustache wearing stallion shouts across the room. "Great to have you back! How's Ponyville been treating you?"
>You approach the bar, Floor trotting beside you
"Up and down, " you respond, "but OK at the moment. You?"
>"All good, the stallion answers. "Who's your date?"
>You turn to Floor
"Floor Bored, meet Angel Share. A decent bartender, but also a master distiller."
>The stallion beams and says, "Pleasure to meet you, Floor."
>She mumbles something you can't make out, but it's enough to work in this situation
>"What can I get ya?," Angel asks
"A couple ciders would be great."


>"Dry or sweet?" Angel asks
>You look at Floor, who seems a little uneasy with this level of social engagement
"You like sweet, right?"
>She nods
"Dry for me and sweet for the lady."
>"Coming right up," Angel responds cheerfully, "and it's happy hour so the next round is on me."
>As the stallion fills two mugs with cider you ask Floor:
"Do you want to sit at the bar or at a table?"
>"I-I think a table would be nice," she says
>You would prefer the bar, but a table is more intimate and probably the better choice for this situation
>"Here's the dry, " Angle says, placing a mug on the bar in front of you, "And here's the sweet for the lady."
"We'll run a tab"
>"Not a problem," he says brightly. "Enjoy!"
>You pick up the mugs and lead Floor over to a cozy table in the corner of the room, away from anypony else
>There's a lit candle in the center of it, making it seem (to you at least) kinda romantic
>Dive bar my ass
"Cheers, " you say, and she clinks her glass against yours, looks you in the eye and you both take a sip
"So what do you think of the place?," you ask her
>"It's actually nicer than I expected, " she says. "I like how it's dark and not so crowded. And the cider is delicious."
"I glad you're feeling better now so you can enjoy it. I was looking forward to bring you here someday."


>Be Floor Bored
>In a bar
>NEETs don't go to bars
>NEETs don't waste their bits on overpriced drinks and mindless socializing
>Yet here you are, and it's actually nice
>You could almost relax if you could get three words that stallion said to stop running around your head
>Who's. Your. Date?
>Anon didn't balk
>And he introduced you to the stallion he's obviously known longer than you, like a gentlecolt
>So that makes you...
>His date?
>And this is normal?
>You're not exactly an expert on what is normal
>Is it pathetic that Anon's idea of an outing with you is a trip to a dive bar?
>Or is it romantic that you're sipping cider with him by candlelight?
>It obviously seemed normal enough to the stallion behind the bar that he just assumed you were on a date
>And Anon didn't correct him
>Is that your heart fluttering?
>How do you deal with this?


>You're no good at reading social clues
>But you're pretty sure this is a date
>Anon didn't bust out laughing when the stallion called you his date
>He seemed proud to introduce you to him
>Angel Share, that's his name
>And he's approaching the table with a tray that has two very small glasses of brown liquid
>"Sorry to interrupt," he says, placing the tray on the table, "but these are on the house."
>Anon smiles and says, "Thanks a lot, Angel. New batch?"
>"Yup," the stallion replies. "I think it's one of my best, but you decide."
>He turns to you, smiling under his bushy mustache and says, "Welcome to the Dewdrop Inn. Maybe you can get Anon to stop being such a stranger here."
>He obviously has no idea who he's talking to, but you nod at him as removes the glasses from the tray, then leaves with it
>Anon just said something you missed
"What? Sorry, I was daydreaming," you say
>"This is his thing," Anon says, "He makes this stuff himself, and he's won awards for it."
>Anon gestures toward the bar the stallion is returning to
>You see at least a dozen medals and ribbons behind the bar
>You look suspiciously at the little glass of brown liquid sitting next to your mug of cider
"I"m guessing it's strong?"
>"Strong as fuck," Anon responds, "but really good."
>He lifts his little glass toward you, and you mirror the gesture
>"Cheers," he says clinking his little glass against yours


>You bring it to your mouth
>It smells intense - strongly of both apples and alcohol
>Taking the tiniest sip you discover that's exactly what it tastes like
>But without any sweetness, just an alcohol burn instead, and a lingering apple flavor
>"Yeah, that's how I drink it, too," Anon says. "Some ponies shoot it, but it's really too good for that."
>Anon seems so comfortable here
>He's more normie than you gave him credit for
>Why does that strike you as sexy?
>You're being pretty normie yourself
>Here you are, a blank flank NEET
>Sitting at a bar on a date with a stallion drinking free drinks by candlelight like a Stacy Glitterhooves
>Online you'd mock the shit out of some mare for enjoying shit like this
>But you think you like it
>You take another sip of the sweet cider - no reason to rush it with the other stuff
>This is much better than hiding in your room all night
"Anon, " you start, unsure of exactly what you want to say
>I want you to fuck me on this table right now?
>Clear your head, Floor
>Don't fuck this up
"This is really nice."
>Nice? You can do better than that
"It was a good idea. I'm sorry I shot it down like an idiot this morning."
>"You weren't an idiot, you just weren't feeling well," he responds, touching your hoof
>He's touching your hoof
>"I'm glad you like it. I never was much of a bar guy, but this place is all right." he says
>Still touching your hoof
>After an eternity his hand pulls away to lift his little glass of liquor to his mouth
>"And you can't argue with Angel's hooch, either," he says.


>Anon continues, "We see each other all the time at home, but we're kind of stuck in our routines."
>"Isn't it fun to break out of that and chill in a different place outside of our regular day to day shit?"
"I wouldn't have thought so. It's so fucking normie, but I'm having a great time," you say
>The alcohol is starting to hit you as well, because that liquor is strong as fuck and you barely ate anything today
"This is a date, right?"
>Oh shit
>You didn't want to say that
>Fuck, Floor, you just fucked it up
>You're terrified to look up at Anon, but when you do he's smiling
>Warmly, not at all like he's about to start laughing at you
>"Do you want this to be a date?," he asks
"Do you want to sound like a fucking therapist?," you quip back
>Shit girl, does being terrified sharpen your sense of humor?
>That was pretty good
>Now he is laughing
>"Yes, Floor. I wanted to ask you out on a date but was not sure how to ask you, so I figured drinks would be a good start"
>He WANTED to ask YOU out on a date!
>OhFuckOhFuckOhFuckOhFuck!
>Keep cool
"So after this we go out to dinner? Like as a date?," you ask in disbelief
>"That's the plan, and I've got enough bits to make that work," he responds


"And then you take me home?"
>"I live there, too, don't forget."
"You know what I mean"
>Was that too forward?
>Did you just drop all your cards on the table?
>Too late to take it back now
>"I can guess, " he says shifting in his seat
>Is he hard?
>You steal a glance downwards, but the table blocks your view
>But from how he's shifting in his seat it seems like he's trying to adjust something down there
>And now your own seat feels a little... moister
"You're making me feel like a Stacy Glitterhooves"
>"I won't tell anypony," he says with a smile.
>And bedroom eyes?
>Is Anon giving you the stallion version of bedroom eyes?!
>And how did talking to him just get so much easier?
>The alcohol?


"You know, you could just, um, we could just, I mean you could take me home now and order a pizza."
>That wasn't as easy to get out
>Don't get so far ahead of yourself, girl
>"So you're feeling this, too?" he says a little sheepishly. "It's not just me?"
"Oh, yeah."
>"It's kind of delicious, isn't it?," he says, his ever so slightly glazed eyes looking at you in the candlelight
>He gently brushes his hand against your cheek, and says, "The tension?"
>You blush
"It um, feels more like a forest fire to me."
>"We have another round of cider coming," he says, obviously feigning nonchalance. "Maybe that'll help that fire."
"You really want to stretch this out as long as possible?"
>"What would Stacy Glitterhooves do?"
"You've gone crazy!"
>"Crazy is wanting to buy you dinner before I... take you home."
>Now you're shifting uncomfortably in your seat, too. Or more like rocking back and forth.
>You look around
>No one notices you two, or gives a shit
>You're in a dark corner of a dark bar
>This is the kind of thing that just normally happens is a place like this, you assume
>It might not be the least bit familiar to you, but you don't feel out of place at all
"Take me home and what?," you say, starting to enjoy this instead of just wanting him to ravage you now in the bathroom
>Wait a sec
>That's actually an option


>Be Anon
>Confident Anon
>Soon no longer to be a wizard Anon
>Floor is into you
>She's blushing at you right now across a candlelit table at the Dewdrop
>One of the few places in Ponyville you can honestly say has been good to you
>Tonight it's been very good
>You're gonna have to thank Angel for the gratis apple brandies when you settle up
>This batch was not just great, but may have had a role in getting you into your current situation
>Which is having the cutest mare in Ponyville looking at you like a chicken dinner right now
>Right, dinner
>You're more than happy to take her out
>That was the plan
>But she's indicated an interest in going straight to dessert, so to speak
>The question is can you walk home with this hard on?
>Because your dick is well aware of what's happening
>And he's weighing in on the sooner rather than later side of things
>Which would make this one of the shortest dates in history, probably
>What was it, not even five minutes from acknowledging it actually was a date to admitting you two wanted each other that way?
>And considering just running home and doing it?
>She's beautiful
>Not in a traditional way
>But like that girl from that 80's teen movie
>The Breakfast Club
>Not the redhead, but the dark haired one
>Back home you saw that movie on TV, they used to show it often when you were a kid
>And you always had a little crush on her
>Now you're basically sitting across from a pony version of that who wants you to fuck her


"I can say it now: Floor, you are so fucking beautiful!"
>She blushes hard
>Which just makes her more attractive in the candlelight
"I can't tell you how many times I've thought that and had to stop myself from saying it."
>She smiles. "I've had to stop myself from saying a lot of things to you as well."
"Like what?," you say as lightheartedly
>She freezes for a second, then shoots you a conspiratorial look
>"Like wanna fuck me in the bathroom?"
>Now you're the one left speechless
"But, um.. isn't the first time supposed to be special?"
>She laughs, "How special do you really think it was it for Stacy and Chad on prom night? A dive bar bathroom is hardcore."
>"Besides," she continues, "Look at this place. I'm sure we won't be the first ponies to have done it in these bathrooms."
>Shit just got real


"So how do we?"
>Her pupils narrow a little, showing more bright green in her eyes
>There's your little psycho
>She says, "You know this place better than I do. Do the bathrooms have locks on the doors, or is it a stalls situation with an open main door?"
"The bathrooms are small, for one person - pony only, so the lock is on the door"
>"Good," she replies. "Unisex, or Mares and Stallions?"
>You laugh
"Where I come from the doors are designated M or W, for Men or Women, so when I got here I saw the M on the door..."
>She's laughing now, too
>"So you saw the M on the door," she laughs some more, "and didn't realize S was for you?"
"Not at first. Somepony had to point that out to me. How the fuck was I supposed to realize I'm a stallion when I've been a man all my life?"
>"That's great! I hope you weren't too embarrassed."
"The first few weeks here were rough."
>"Poor Anon," she says without a trace of pity
>This hoers is awesome once you get her out of the house and into a bar!


>"So," she continues, "Small mare's bathroom with lock on the door? Easy. I'll head in that direction, and you follow in like a minute."
"You've already thought this through?"
>"The minute I realized this was actually happening," she counters. "when you said the WAS a date."
>"Just do me a favor," she looks at you imploringly
"Anything."
>"Leave anything for later," she says, becoming a little less secure about herself before your eyes
>"I need to know this is real and not a fucking dream. Don't worry about making love or pleasing me or whatever the latest liberal cliche is"
>"Just FUCK me so I know this is real. Cum as fast as you can, then leave. I'll clean up and meet you back at our table"
>"Because if you leave me standing there with your cum dripping out of me I'll know this is REAL, and not some crazy dream."
>Your dick just hit full mast, and there HAS to be a wet spot where the tip is straining against your pants
"Let's do this as discreetly as we can," you say, "I don't want Angel to think we're disrespecting his place."
>"Don't think about him you fucking faggot," she says with the full psycho bedroom eyes thing engaged, "think about fucking me!"
>She trots off toward the bathroom


>You can do this
>You've got your hard on positioned so the head of your cock is under your belt buckle
>You stand up from the table and put your hands into your pockets
>Feels like you're 14 again
>In this dim light you ought to be able to manage a walk to the bathroom without it being obvious you're sporting wood
>As you pass the bar Angel shouts at you, "How was that brandy, Anon?"
"Might be your best ever, " you respond trying to keep your cool
"And we're ready for the next round of cider when you have a minute."
>"Coming right up," the stallion responds
>You make it past the bar to the door with an M on it and knock gently
"It's me, Floor," you whisper
>You hear the latch move and the door quickly opens
>Stepping inside she locks it behind you
>There's really just enough room for the two of you in here
>She stands in front of you and lifts her tail with a wink
>Which leaves a drop of marecum dripping from her pony clit
>You unzip your pants and release your cock


>The angle with you standing is pretty good, would be better if she were up a little higher, but you can work this
>You guide yourself to her opening and press forward
>She's warm, tight and soaked
>She gasps and winks on you, making the muscles of her marevag ripple from the hilt to your cockhead
>More than a ripple, more like a squeeze
"You feel amazing, Floor."
>"You feel pretty great yourself, Anon.", she says with more than a little edge in her voice. "Now fuck me!"
>You heard the lady
>You first few strokes are slow, just savoring how good your dick feels with this little warm mare wrapped around it
>But instinct takes over quickly
>Harder, faster strokes feel better, and are rewarded with winks from her, which are the most incredible thing you've ever felt
>"That's it Anon, fuck me harder!," she says between heavy breaths
>As you start slamming you look at the little mare impaled on your cock
>There's a move you've sen in pony porn that you think you can pull off in spite of the height difference
>You hilt in her and lean forward, wrapping your hands around her throat, pulling her head back toward you
>Her ears are just in striking distance


>Leaning just a little forward you bite her left ear, just a little harder than gently
>"Oh Celestia," she gasps, and rewards you with the most vigorous wink yet
>So ear biting is a thing, and you can still manage to slam her like this as long as you keep pulling her into you
>You're probably halfway to choking her, but at this point you're beyond caring
>Cum in me, Anon. I want to feel you cum in me."
>You're only a few strokes away
>You can feel your orgasm approaching
>You bite harder on her ear and hilt again
>A hard squeeze of her vag works the first spasm out of you with a wash of pleasure
>"I can feel you," she gasps. "Oh shit I can feel you pumping inside me. This is fucking REAL!"
>You release her ear and throat and lean back as you unload into her, grabbing her flanks to keep you hilted
>Her tail is really pretty lifted like that
>Your sexual intensity is immediately replaced by an urge to cuddle with her
>Which really isn't going to happen in the mare's room of the Dewdrop Inn


>"Zip up and get out of here," she says, smiling at you. She's never looked at you like THAT before. "I'll meet you in a minute."
>You zip up, noticing the area around your crotch is now noticeably wet
>It doesn't quite look like you wet yourself, but it doesn't look great
>You open the door and step out
>Nopony in sight
>You got away with this
>You quickly walk back to your table where Angel has already placed your next round
>What a way to lose your wizard status
>And the way she looked at you after
>There was a softness in her eyes you didn't even think she was capable of
>And it was directed at you
>Jesus, you have a marefriend now
>Who you just unloaded what felt like a massive amount of cum into
>You look down at the wet spot on your pants
>She's no slouch either
>You take a sip of cider
>And here she comes walking past the bar
>If any other mare walked out of the bathroom looking that disheveled it would be obvious what had just happened
>But in her case she walked in looking that way


>She comes to the table and sits down, giggling like a filly
"That was amazing," you say
>"I can't believe this is real," she says, "I was so sure I was gonna wake up alone in my room when I came."
"So you did cum?"
>"Not while you were fucking me. Good thing, too. Your zipper was hitting my clit. A minute more of that and I'd be in pain now."
>She adds with a smile, "But it was like five seconds after you left. You have no idea how hot it is having your cum in me."
"You have no idea how hot it was getting it in there."
>"Oh yes I do", she says
>You've never seen her like this
>There's no edge on her
>No sign of stress or awkwardness
>No trace of psycho in those eyes as she reaches a hoof up to gently brush up against your cheek
>Moving the candle out of the way you lean over the table to kiss her
>She meets your lips, then you feel her little pony tongue brush up against them
>You open up your mouth and let your tongue touch hers
>And you hear Angel's voice booming from the bar, "Get a room, you two!"
>She pulls back, blushing and giggling, and whispers, "We already did."


>You and Floor are standing at the bar
>You've just left Angel a nice tip as a thanks for the free apple brandy
>"Thanks a lot," has says, and turns his attention to Floor
>"And it was a pleasure to meet you, Ms Floor. You're welcome here anytime, but I have to ask you a favor..."
>She freezes and her eyes go narrow
>Is he about to call you on your bathroom escapade?
>Angel continues, "Stop keeping your coltfriend all to yourself. I don't want you two to be strangers around here!"
>"Duly noted," she responds in a spot on Princess Twilight impression
>Angel is taken aback. "Hey you sound just like the princess." 
>He laughs, "You better watch it Anon, this one might be too good for you!"
>Without missing a beat Floor quips, "Oh, I think he'll rise to the challenge."
>Who is this mare?
>"You two have a good night," Angel responds, obviously not going to touch that one
"Good night Angel"
>You lead Floor to the door, opening it for her to reveal the evening dusk outside
"Fucking Dewdrop," you say, "Best damn place in Ponyville."
>Floor responds, "And now it's OUR place!"


>Shit, this is a whole new side of her you never imagined existed
>You were very attracted to anxious, awkward, psycho shut-in Floor
>But the mare she's revealed to you over the last half hour?
>Floor 2.0 Marefriend Edition?
>This is a serious upgrade
>Outside she stands on her back legs, throwing her forelegs around you in a hug that has her nuzzling into your neck
>"Thanks for the best date ever," she says
>The best date ever was fucking in a dive bar bathroom?
>You can roll with that, actually
>Honestly this is the most fun you've had since you arrived in Ponyville
>She feels so warm and soft against you
>Running a hand down her mane you say, "Well it's not over yet. Where would you like to go to dinner?"
>"Seriously, Anon?," she responds, breaking the embrace, "Do you really think I could keep my hooves off you long enough to sit through dinner out?"
>"Let's just go home, order a pizza and do what we're both thinking anyway."
>Maybe Angel was right
>If this keeps up she might be too good for you
>But you will, um, RISE to the challenge


>Be Floor Bored
>Trotting next to Anon on your way home it feels like you're walking on air
>Is this how a pegasus feels walking on clouds?
>You were sure the whole thing was a dream
>Anon asks you out for cider, and it felt like a date
>He admitted it was
>You HAD to be dreaming
>Then you had massive sex in the bathroom of the bar
>Again, it HAD to be a dream
>There was no way it was actually happening
>Then before you left the stallion behind the bar called Anon your coltfriend
>And you confidently joked around with him, at least a little
>This HAS to be a dream
>But you haven't woken up yet
>You're pretty sure you still feel wet from his cum inside you as you stop him for the fourth or fifth time on this short walk home
>You rear up on your hind legs, throwing your forelegs around him, to be met with his arms around you
>In public, on the fucking street!
>And you're met with kisses as you kick one hind lag up, leaving you on one hoof wrapped in him
>Still you don't wake up!
>Maybe you're in a coma?


>Or maybe this is real
>Except now Anon is kissing you!
>And you're kissing him back
>You feel like a filly finally managing to get the attention of the colt you had a crush on
>Except for the fact he fucked you in a dive bar bathroom less than half an hour ago
>You're pretty sure most fillies wouldn't go that far
>Unless they were dreaming
>Anon slowly pulls his lips away from yours
>"Floor," he says, "tis is a little more in the way of PDA than I'm comfortable with."
>He continues, "I'm happy with all of Ponyville knowing we're an item, but we don't need to advertise it on the street every couple minutes!"
>He's right
>Usually you'd mercilessly mock anyponies behaving like this
>Fucking Stacy and Chad stealing a kiss on the street
>Yet now it's like a switch you didn't even know you had has been flipped
>It feels so good to just TOUCH him, and have him touch you
>Without any awkwardness or anxiety, because you both KNOW this is what you want
>How is this not a dream?!
"S-sorry, Anon," you respond. "I still can't believe this is real."
"And the only 'item' I see here is yours pressing against me."
>"This is real as fuck," he responds, "and you're making it impossible for me to walk home without embarrassing myself."
>Looking down at his crotch you see his hard on straining against his pants, leaving an obvious wet spot in a telling location
"It's dark now," you say. "Nopony can tell. Except me."
>"You're loving this, aren't you?"
>You are
>Anon is trying to hide his hard on from all of Ponyville, and YOU'RE the reason for it
"Yes, I love this," you hear yourself saying. "Call me a fucking normie, but I do."
>"How could I throw any stones?," he says, gesturing. "You took away my wizard hat and cape less than an hour ago."
>You did
>And now you're heading home for more of that
>PLEASE don't fucking wake up!


>You laugh
"Your wizard hat..."
>The vision of Anon dressed up like the Great and Powerful Trixie is too much
>Anon isn't just sexy
>He's funny, too
>You don't just have somepony to touch you now
>You have somepony you can be goofy with
"Now I can't stop thinking about you dressed like Trixie." you giggle
>"Oh, like a roleplay thing?," he responds. "Got a little lesbo in you?"
"No," you say, maybe a little too quickly, blushing
>But you really don't
>This is an opening
>Dare you take advantage?
"B-but I do have a stray fetish or two..."
>"Don't we all?," he says, resting his hand on your mane as you see your house in the distance
>That's it?!
>Blase acceptance?
>For all he knows you could be one of those freaks into vore and shitting dicknipples


>His hand feels good on you
>That's something a stallion couldn't do
>Rest a hoof on you while you walked together
>He's different, that's for sure
>That's part of why you're so comfortable around him
>So many of the things other ponies would judge you for don't seem to matter to him
>Maybe he'd be cool with...?
>You DO have to pee from all that cider
>And now all you can think about is letting it loose all over him while he's fucking you
>You are so perverted
>You finally get a stallion inside you, and in less than an hour you want to pee on him
>Well, it's pretty obvious what's gonna happen the moment you're on the other side of that door up ahead
>And you have to pee anyway
>Everything that's happened today happened because you acted like it was a dream, instead of real life
>Why stop now?


>Be Anon
>Walking home from your first date with Floor
>God these ponies move quickly
>It went from awkward acknowledgment that it WAS a date
>To the loss of your virginity
>To being her coltfriend, and her having no qualms about letting all of Ponyville know it in what?
>22 minutes?
>And she's like a whole new pony - confident, relaxed, talkative, affectionate...
>And frank - like totally up front with you
>Like "Fuck me in the bathroom" up front
>You were really fond of the pony you took out on a date
>But the mare you're bringing home?
>This hoers is awesome
>And she pretty much just told you she's kinky
>Your dick is begging you to hurry toward the door of your place, about 30 yards away
"Race you home!" you say, as off the cuff and playfully as you can muster
>And she's off like a shot
>You've never seen her gallop before!
>In spite of your best efforts to keep up she's leaving you in the dust
>Protip: do not try to out sprint a hoers
>At the door she smiles at you, breathing a little heavy
>"What took you so long?," she says, coquettishly
"You are full of surprises today, Floor."
>"And the night's still young, " she says opening the door. "Get in here, you!"


>The second the door shuts she's back in your arms, her little tongue darting around your mouth
>She reaches a hoof down to rub your crotch
>"Those pants have got to come off this time," she says
>You pull away from her and set your lifetime speed record for getting your pants off
>She's staring at your dick
>"Wow," she says. "It's not quite like a stallion cock, but it's beautiful!"
>"The head is round instead of flat," she continues, reaching a hoof up to you. "But the size is right."
"I'm glad you approve," you say, aching for her to do more than just talk about it
"You can give it a kiss, if you want."
>"Is THAT what you want?," she says, looking up at you with full bedroom eyes
>Before you can respond you feel her warm, flat pony tongue slide down your shaft
>Her standing is just the right height for this, and she looks really cute with her head now bobbing on your cock
>She pulls away for a second and says, "You taste like ME! Well, me plus salty milk and coins."
>You shut your eyes and just revel in the feeling of the little mare's mouth wrapped around your dick
>You could get used to THIS
>She pulls away again
>"You are not gonna cum in my mouth, Anon," she says. "Not this time, at least. I want to feel you in me again."
>She turns away from you, presenting her rear, tail lifted in the the most come hither way possible
>You never thought you'd be turned on by a mare lifting her tail for you
>To be honest you never thought a mare ever would
>Now the sight of her unbrushed tail straining to reveal her marehood is the sexiest thing you've ever seen
>You are so going to fuck this hoers


>You guide your dick into her with your hand to be met with a wink
>Suddenly everything is warm, wet, and tight around you
>And you start thrusting into her
>Without even thinking about it your right hand goes for her flank and your left...
>Your left hand goes straight for that tail
>She gasps, "Oh yeah, Anon! Pull my fucking tail!"
>You don't need to be told that twice
>She tightens around you as you tighten your grip on her tail
>"Oh you are so gonna make me cum, Anon!"
>Time to just rail her
>You start pounding as hard as you can, pulling her onto you by the tail and flank
>Not super fast, but hard and deep
>You are rewarded with several more winks, each more intense than the other as her vag clenches around your cock
>You increase your speed a little and she starts to tremble
>And hits you with a wink so hard it pushes your cock right out of her
>"Oh FUCK!," she moans
>You fumble your way back in and she's SOAKED
>Like hot, dripping down your legs and balls soaked
>Like...


>Fillies and gentlecolts it appears we have a squirter!
>And you are now standing in the kitchen in a puddle of pony pee, with the little pony who made it wrapped around your dick
>"Celestia, " she pants
"You just made a mess all over me."
>She catches her breath as you keep plowing into her
>"Your dick doesn't seem to mind."
>Your dick doesn't mind one bit, actually
>It's actually kinda hot
>"Now you can...," she's still breathing hard, "...make a mess inside of me."
>Gripping her flank and tail you pull the little mare back and forth on your dick like she's a fucking toy
"You wanna feel me make a mess inside of you?"
>Her response is a whimper, and another wink
>Those winks feel amazing
"You wanna feel me make a mess inside you?"
>You're being a little rough, but why the fuck not?
>She did just pee on you
>"Yes... YES!," she manages to get out
>Slamming her onto you as hard as you can you hilt and feel the first spasm of your orgasm, as pleasure floods over you
>"Oh shit," she says, "I can feel you cumming! I can feel you..."
>She tightens around you and starts shaking again as you pump the last of your cum into her
>You hold her firmly in place against you until you're both finished
>When you release her she crumples to the floor, lying half in a puddle of her own piss
>There's your new pone gf
>Unkempt, lying in a puddle of piss with your cum dripping out of her
"You are a filthy little thing," you say admiringly
>She smiles up at you
>"Best date ever," she says
"If I order the pizza now we'll have just enough time to clean this up and hit the shower before it gets here"
>She pouts a little
>"I guess we HAVE to take a shower after that."


>Be Floor Bored
>You have a coltfriend
>A coltfriend who sure gets affectionate after...
>After you have pretty filthy sex with him
>In the shower he washed your mane and tail
>Then he sat you on the couch and proceeded to brush your mane until the pizza came
>Since then you two have just been cuddling and making goo goo eyes at each other
>You've only managed to eat half of the pizza
>You ought to be disgusted with yourself
>Not about the sex
>That was hot
>But about this cuddly stuff
>Part of you is totally repulsed by this Stacy bullshit
>That isn't you
>But a bigger part of you just wants to feel him touch you
>And get lost looking into his eyes
>Usually the only thing that makes you feel like you're not alone is interacting with other ponies online
>And even then you still feel a little alone
>On the couch with Anon right now?
>You don't feel the least bit alone


>It's a brand new feeling for you
>It's kind of overwhelming, actually
>Kind of?
>It's completely overwhelming
>Seriously, Floor, you're not about to
>Not in front of Anon
>This one you don't have control over, as your vision goes blurry from the welling tears in your eyes
>And now you're a sobbing wreck
>Anon wraps his arms around you and you sob on his shoulder
>"I know," he says gently. "Me, too."
>You wipe your eyes with a hoof and look at him
>He's only marginally more composed than you
"What the fuck is happening?"
>"I think...," he begins. "It's hitting you that this is real, and you're not the same mare you were when you woke up this morning."
>You think about that, trying not to get lost in his eyes again
>He adds, "I know I'm not the same guy I was just a few hours ago. I'm feeling a bunch of things I've never felt before."
"Yeah, that's it. YOU are making me feel all these things that don't feel like me... or at least the me of the last few years."
>"I hear you," he responds. "Romantic stuff is completely uncharted territory for me, yet all the sudden I feel..."
>You finish his sentence
"Romantic as fuck about you."
>"As fuck," he agrees. "So how do we deal with it? My vote is try to enjoy it like a couple of normies."
>You laugh
"That sounds horrible."
>"Going out for cider with me in the first place sounded horrible, didn't it? You shot me down in seconds. But look what happened."
>He's got you there
>Maintaining eye contact is hard, but you make an effort now
"This is real, right? Please tell me this is fucking real."
>"This is real, Floor"


(Skip this if you have any feels invested in this story)
[spoiler]>You suddenly feel cold and wet, and Anon and the couch disappear like smoke
>You rollover to discover your mattress is soaked with cold pee again
>And opening your eyes to reveals your dark room
>Where you are alone[/spoiler]