>be Anon

>You finally finish your homemade portal out of stuff you bought at a local BestBuy and teleport to Equestria, the land of small rainbow horses.
>Just like in every greentext you've read (and written), a kind pony picks you up from the outskirts of some random city and helps you with not dying from starvation.

>She doesn't have much herself, but as a past NEET you don't need a lot of food to live anyway.
>A travelling pony and an autistic human, what a pair.
>Except, both don't know anything about living with another living being, especially when it's just as self-centered as they are.


>Day 14 of living with Trixie, road from Fillydelphia to the central parts of Equestria.

>You release the pen from your deadly grip, and shake the strain pain from your hand.
>Never got enough practice with writing back at home.
>All you did with a pen back then was draw horse puss--
>Knock knock
>Oh, Trixie has woken up.
>Is it morning already?
>You could swear you sat down to add your second week in Equestria to your diary at just about 11 P.M, if not earlier.
>KNOCK KNOCK!
>Why did you even start a diary, again?
>"ANON!"
>Oh, right
"Yeah, yeah, wait, wait, wait."
>Your legs are going to kill you...

>You open the cute little door to see the blue pony without her hat and cape, and seemingly very, very anxious about something.
>And she looks like she's about to scream right no--
>"ANON! GET OUT, FAST!"
>Wait.
>What.
>As you're coming to your senses, Trixie is nowhere to be seen.
>She's probably outside, already.
>You take a peek in the opening further.
>Everything in the front door is dark.
>And you seem to be catching a smell of something.
>Sniff
>Sniff
>It's smoke.
>That can only mean...
"Oh, shit."
>FIRE!

>...

>The last bit of your carriage falls off with a cracking sound.
>Trixie stands beside you, watching most of what she owned burn and crumble.
>And you're clutching to your last suit and your diary of adventures in Equestria.
>So it wasn't morning after all.

>"Damn it all."
>Trixie falls to the ground, with a moan of defeat.
>"It had to be right here, in the middle of nowhere!"
>"Right at this very moment is the worst possible time for it to break."
>You sit on the slightly wet grass.

>It's a strange land.
>It looks just like Earth.
>And feels just like Earth.
>Feeling the cold autumn air again...
>Is refreshing.
>The dark outlines of tall trees, towering over you...
>While the night sky was spotless, you felt like a rain was coming.
>Just the moisture in the air, you know.
>It makes the air even more chilling.


>Chilling, right.
>You really should put your suit back on.
>Throwing the jacket over your shoulder, you hear a quiet sob.
>Is Trixie crying?
>The Great and Powerful Trixie, coming to such a low point?
>Honestly, you get the feel.

>"This is the last..."
>She sobs again, now louder, as she caught your attention.
>"...straw, Anon."
>Aw, fucking hell.
>The pony had already curled up in her tail to keep warm.
"Already asleep, eh? It must be all the stress, you poor thing."
>You drag her in your lap and cover the rest with your body.
>And now should be the best time to get your sleep as well.

>...

>You wake up with the Sun shining right in your still hazy eyes.
>And only now realize that your shirt is all wet from the grass under you.
>Fuck, that's the last one.

>Trixie's still sleeping in your lap, albeit in a slightly different position, as now you are lying down instead of just sitting.
>She seems so calm now.
>Just as about any living creature that's sleeping, you guess.
>Maybe even you.
>Goddamnit, now you want to see how you sleep.

>Sometimes you wonder how do you look with your eyes closed.
>Then you think "It's easy, just get a camera".
>Then the realization comes.
>Oh, how much you could do on Earth...
>You took it for granted.
>Idiot.

>"Anon?"
>You look down on the little pony in your lap.
>Trixie just woke up, but looked like her normal self already.
>You'd never manage that.
>Ever.
>"It wasn't a dream, was it?"
>Both of you turn your heads to the burnt carriage.
>It was really fuckin' cool, by the way.
>Like, bigger on the inside and everything.
>Just what you expected from a magician pony.

>Sob.
>Again.
>Oh Trixie, one minute you look like a Princess...
>And right the next you're a crying wreck of a homeless pony.
>It must've been embarassing, if not for the fact that you're the only one seeing her in this condition.
>Ha.

>You gently pet her mane to try calming her down.
>It's fabulous; silky smooth and light at the same time, it flows under your fingers like the fur of a cat that's more expensive than you yourself are.
>Never really got to touch her mane during these two weeks.
>You never really got close to her, in fact.
>It was like two step-siblings that see each other for the first time.
>Except one of them was a different species.
>Maybe it's for the best.

>Oh, and Trixie seems to have stopped crying.
>Your mane-petting might have helped.
>"Hmph."
>Horse noises.
>"I would say that I thank you, but you already know that."
>She gets up and stretches her legs.
>Just like a cat.
>You wish you had one back home.

>Well, at least you helped her get better.
>And she seems to be heading to the ashpile.
>Not really an ashpile, but a bunch of burned wood on a melted frame.
>You also get up from your cross-legged position.
>It's really not good for your limbs.

>Approaching, under the burned floor you see something that seems to be a little engine strapped to a crankshaft.
>Trixie's also looking at it.
>"That's the reason of the fire."
>"It's an engine, I'm sure you humans have them in some form."
>"Powered by magic, you see. And since magic is energy, and energy cannot just disappear, it converts into heat."
>With that, she lightly kicks the ash off it's side.
>You see a thing, which is probably supposed to be a heatsink.
>It must've came off.
>"It's cooling system broke, so it overheated."
>She sighs, looking at the clear blue sky through the remains of the roof.
>And then giggles.
>"Still better than tugging it yourself."

>Trixie looks at you with the cutest puppy eyes you've ever witnessed.
>She knows how to hit that feel, doesn't she.
>"Anon, I have to ask you something."
>Oh.
>Here we go again.
>"Would you be so kind to help me with my bags?"
>Well…
>That wasn't as bad as you expected.
>You quietly nod.
>"My back is killing me after sleeping with the bags on."
>She drops them off herself with a quick motion.
>Like she's done a lot of times before the shows.
>You pick them up by the middle strap.
>"Also, Anon…"
>With a long "Mmmm?", you turn your head to the pony.
>She hesitates.
>Tries hiding in her room.
>But there's no door.
>After she realizes that, with a sigh of defeat, Trixie finally manages to finish the sentence.
>"Thank you. For helping me get through the last night."
>Are you blushing?
>You feel like you're blushing.
>Shit.
>Shitshitshitshitshi–
>"I consider that as "you're welcome"."
>Dumbstruck, you stand there with the saddlebags in your hands.
>"Let's not talk about this ever again."
>You nod furiously.


>Trixie gets back to rummaging through her room.
>She looks everywhere: in the dresser, under it, behind it, over it, under the little bed, or rather what's left of all of them.
>"Anon."
>The blue horse cartoonishly jumps out of the bed's frame.
>"Have you seen the map?"
>Oh.
>She's looking for the map.
>You raise your index finger.
>With it sticking out, you squeeze the saddlebags between your legs and flail your other hand inside it, looking for the map you're sure Trixie has put in there.
>"Are you sure it's in there? I don't remember taking the map out o--"
>Ah!
>You look triumphally at Trixie, while holding the scroll that was the map of Equestria.
>Trixie's eyes shine, while taking it from your hand with her magic and opening it.
>"Anon, you're a saviou--"
>There's sure a lot of interrupting going on here.
>"That's not the right map."
>Oh.
>"I was looking for the magic map that told us where we are!"

>"Of course, I could calculate that, but I don't have time for such things."
>Gimme that.
>You take the map off her forcefully.
>Calculating where you are on a perfectly good map?
>It's easy!

>"Um."
>"We were heading west."
>Bwah, even easier.
>The map's scale looks like 1:1000000.
>So that means 1 centimeter per 10 kilometers.
>An engine of that mass would probably produce about 10kN of force.
>The mass of the carriage is about 2 tons.
>Simple math...
>Your acceleration would be 5 meters per second, or 18 kilometers an hour.
>You've been on the road since 7 PM to about 3.30 AM, which is 8.5 hours...
>You've passed 153 kilometers!
>Now you just need to measure 15.3 cm on this map...

>"Found it!"
>Trixie trots to you in glee with a scroll floating beside her.
>Fuck.

>She got it.
>She's definitely gotten it.
>Don't move.
>"Anon, you didn't really just try calculating that, did you?"
>What to say.
>Anon, think.
>Turn on your think tank.
>More like "empty tank".
>Ha.
>Now's not the time for jokes.
>It's a matter of life and death.
>Trixie's gonna die of laughter if she finds out.

>be Trixie.
>Anon's been standing here for 5 minutes without moving at all.
>And there's ominous noises coming out of him.
>The Great and Powerful Tr-trixie is scared.

>be Anon again

>You're still standing in one spot.
>Staring blankly into her eyes.
>Piercing her very soul, seeing through her very being.

>Trixie might consider that creepy.
>You need to say something.
>You shake your head to wipe that expression from your face.
>"A-anon?"

>With a "Hm?", you tilt your head a little.
>So she knows that you're alive and not posessed by some kind of demon.
>Goddamn your neck hurts.

>"Are you alright?"
>Since when is she caring about your well-being?
>You travelled to a land of magical rainbow-colored horses with a portal that you made in my basement.
>Left everything for this.
>And now you're slowly going mad, it seems.
>No, I'm not alright.

>She probably is just worried about herself.

>Trixie gets out of the corner.
>Wait.
>Aren't you forgetting something?
>Oh.
>That.
>"W-we really need to get going Anon, until it gets dark agai--"
>You shoot off immediately towards the place where you spent your night.
"Fu-u-u-uck..."

>Where is it.
>Where the hell is it.
>You hear Trixie's voice in the distance while diving under a rock.
>You'd really love to have a flashlight right about now.
>Should've prepared better, Ano--
>You spot something brown and leathery in some grass.
>There it is!
>Your diary is safe.
>How could you ever forget about it, Anon.

>"Is there something wrong?..."
>Trixie notices the thing you're holding in your hands from behind you.
>You can almost hear the eyeroll.

>"Are you ready to move out now, Anon?"
>You guess so.
>Now that you're in a good mood.
>It doesn't matter that you've left everything you had back home.
>After all, you've come here to start a new life.

>Giddily, you turn around on your heel to face her.
>It's a lot harder to do now because of all the dirt.
>You nod.

>Anon the Human and Trixie the Magician Pony are moving out to new and exciting adventures.
>And tiring, seeing how now they'll have to hike their way to said adventures.

>But it won't stop them anyway.