Be Anon
>In prison for possession of salt
>Apparently it's a narcotic in this world
>You had just gotten home from the dollar store across the street and had brought a 26 oz can 
>When you were transported into this world the salt came with you
>One of the cops who arrested you could apparently smell it
>Everyone here seems to think that you must be a big deal since you had the gall to walk around with so much of the stuff
>A team of dealers in here want to team up with you after their release
>You keep telling them that you're not one of them but they just don't believe you
>The junkies aren't any less annoying
>Eventually you get tired of this and escape
>It's not difficult, all you have to do is grab a pillow and start swinging wildly while running towards the front door
>Once you're outside you notice that the police station is actually right next to the prison
>It looks like the same police station that you were held in after your arrest
>That's convenient
>You run inside, threatening all the guards with your pillow and run towards the room labeled "evidence" and after a little rummaging around you find your salt
>When you get back to the prison a guard tries to pounce on you
>You pour some salt into your hand and throw it at him 
>Disobeying the laws of physics, he stops for a few seconds in mid-air before dropping to the floor
>You walk around the prison throwing salt at everything you see
"Salt, salt, have some salt, everyone gets salt!"
>Ponies everywhere are laying on the floor, some laughing, some crying, some in a catatonic state
>Halfway through your rampage you get an idea
>You find the group of dealers that had been annoying you throughout your sentence
"Is that offer still good?"

A month later
Be Anon 
>All those dealers from the prison are now working under you 
>You quickly rose up the ranks in the salt game using your business tactics
>The elusive "Saltman" is now the Equestrian DEA's top priority
>This is fun